Zitao personality shifts once more and he begins to cling onto Yixing as the end of April approaches. And then, before either realizes it, It’s his birthday and May. Yixing doesn’t know how to get the younger male to stop clinging to him. He doesn’t want to cause another rift between them, doesn’t want to fight, but he does want to see Kai. Every time he tries to subtly mention the Korean male or visiting his house, Zitao either volunteers Kris to drive him there or avoids the topic all together. Yixing doesn’t like it.

Yixing loves his cousin dearly, Zitao had always been like a younger brother to him, and Yixing was used to the younger’s random clinginess. When Kris first entered their lives, Zitao would be the one always complaining about the older male.  Zitao gets clingy when he feels like he’s being left out, so Yixing figures that maybe he’ll indulge his younger cousin a little bit more, reassure the younger that he’s not going anyway, so when Yixing tells Zitao the truth about Kai it’ll be easier.

Yixing relies on SMS, and phone calls to keep him in contact with the others in the meantime.

On Zitao’s birthday, Kris and him spend most of the day with the birthday boy before going to a tiny party where Jongdae, Amber, Yixing’s mother, and a few of Zitao’s friends help them celebrate.

 “I’m happy,” Zitao tells him later when the party has ended and they’re stuffed from birthday cake and Zitao’s favorite dishes from home.

“It’s your birthday you’re supposed to be happy,” Yixing tells him, as he talks to Sehun through text message. Sehun had become the most open to him and willing to interact via text message. Kai did phone calls and the others didn’t respond as fast as Sehun did when they were texting.

“No but I’m really really happy,” Zitao explains. “It’s not a birthday happy, it’s a daily happy. Everything seems to finally be going right for me.”

“Really,” Yixing asks, turning his attention from his phone to look at his cousin. “You’re living a fairytale huh?”

Zitao frowns and throws a glare at him. “I’m happy because I’m not ashamed about what’s making me happy. After what I’ve done and went through before it’s nice to have no secrets and lies, everything is a lot less stressful and I feel truly happy.”

“That’s nice,” Yixing mutters, going back to his cellphone. It’s not that he’s not happy for his cousin, he’s just as happy for his cousin as anyone else; it’s just that Zitao’s words seemed as if they were attacking him. Maybe he’s overreacting and overthinking the younger’s words but he can’t help but frown down at his phone while Zitao sighs happily into the air.

Zitao’s clinginess doesn’t cease even after his birthday, if anything it gets worse. Every day after school Zitao would rush to his classroom and find a way to get Yixing to come with him, which wasn’t exactly hard because Yixing was extremely cautious about his relationship with Kai, and Zitao was extremely stubborn.

Yixing manages to work out a plan. On Friday fifteen minutes before the class is over he fakes sick, grabs his bag and heads off to the infirmary. Yixing stays there until minutes before class ends, and then heads off to the nearest exit.

Zitao travels down the same route day by day so Yixing manages to avoid him, Jongdae, and Amber while leaving the school.

The Chinese male reaches Kai’s house before even Junmyeon makes it back, and runs into an exiting Chanyeol. “Look who decided to show up,” Chanyeol remarks, a lazy grin on his lips as he stares down at Yixing. “We were starting to get worried.”

“Sorry,” Yixing mutters, eyes straying to the ground, shoulders hunching up, and hands reaching into his slacks like he’s a child being reprimanded. “Things sorta...”

“I get it,” Chanyeol states, waving a hand dismissively. “Don’t think so badly of us okay. We’re not that judgemental. You come when can and you don’t when you can’t, we get that so don’t force yourself hyung.”

“Thank you,” Lay sighs a look of gratitude flashing across his features. Chanyeol smiles brightly at him, and bids him goodbye. Yixing enters the house next and heads towards Kai’s room. Chanyeol’s understanding, but he can only hope that Kai’s understanding as well.

Yixing knocks loudly before opening the door and heading up the steps, Kai’s on the floor in front of his bed, glaring down at his cellphone and Yixing can’t help but wonder why he seems upset.

“Is it broken,” he asks, cautiously. It’s the only thing that makes sense in his mind, Kai’s cellphone is really expensive and Yixing wouldn’t be surprised if most of his life was connected to it. Kai seemed to have a lot of friends and acquaintances, so it was understandable if he was frustrated at probably losing contacts.

“No,” Kai answers shaking his head. He stops his glare to glance up at Yixing and smiles. “A friend just called.”

Yixing doesn’t think a friend had just called. Kai’s not really the type to show so much emotion over a call he makes seem so minor, but if Kai isn’t in the mood to tell him yet than he won’t force the boy.

“I missed you,” Yixing tells him, walking deeper into the room and sitting on the loveseat in the corner. “I wanted to see you, but I couldn’t and you love your sleep don’t you.”

“If you wanted to meet at 3pm or 3am you just had to ask,” Kai tells him, putting his phone on his bed and moving to sit beside Yixing. “I wanted to see you too, but I didn’t want to be the cause of us not meeting again. You couldn’t see me because of your cousin right?”

“It was his birthday so he was a bit clingy,” Yixing states softly. “Plus he just got a boyfriend, he was nervous about the fact that they’re a couple now so he doesn’t know how to act.”

“Weren’t they friends before, they even slept together right, why would he drag you along when you’re more inexperienced?”

“Zitao didn’t want to appear too clingy or too childish. Even if they did things before they’ve only just started dating after years of being friends. Transitioning into that kind of thing can be awkward.” Yixing’s never experienced such a relationship change but he can imagine it, especially in Zitao’s perspective, he was technically trying to replace the guy Kris liked which meant he had to live with being someone’s second best for a while if Kris still hadn’t sorted out his feelings.

“Does he know about me,” Kai asks, “did you tell him yet?”

“So I am supposed to tell him,” Yixing states. He bites his lips to keep the sigh on the tip of his tongue from escaping. If Kai wanted him to tell Zitao by a certain time he should have him. Yixing was just living on obliviously, thinking he was doing what Kai wanted.

“Were you hoping to keep me secret forever,” Kai asks him, raising an eyebrow.

“You’re not a secret,” Yixing mutters, Kai grabs his chin and forces him to stare into his eyes, his eyebrows are raised in challenge and Yixing swallows thickly because he hates confrontation.  “You’re not a secret,” Yixing tells him weakly. “Zitao knows of you. He knows I come to meet you.”

“Does he know my name,” Kai asks him, lips pulling into a deep frown, fingers tugging at the fabric of the suede sofa cushions. “Does he know who my friends are or that he hates me?”

“He doesn’t hate you,” Yixing tells him. “He just doesn’t know you.”

“I think he knows,” Kai retorts. “I think he knows about us. I think that’s why I haven’t seen you since the party. He hates me and he’s keeping you away from me either to protect you or to spite me.”

“He doesn’t know,” Yixing huffs out. “You don’t even know him yet you’re making up accusations about him. My cousin would tell me if he knew about us, he wouldn’t do something as petty as that.”

“Will you tell him,” Kai asks him. “Will you go home today and tell him about us and ask if he knows.”

“No,” Yixing states, and then quickly shuts his mouth and turns to Kai. He grabs onto the younger male’s shirt sleeve and begins to ramble in panic. “I didn’t mean that. I–I don’t want to tell him today, but it’s not because of what you’re thinking. I don’t want to fight with him or spend more time away from you. I’ll do it–”

“Because he’ll keep you away from me if he knew about us,” Kai asks, interrupting his panicked speech. Yixing bites his lips and shakes his head. Kai’s not letting him explain properly.

“He can’t keep me away from you,” Yixing states. “I’m in control of myself.” Kai flashes him a look of disbelief before pulling his arm away and walking towards the bedroom door, mumbling a soft ‘whatever.’

Yixing remains on the loveseat, going over the conversation in his head. He doesn’t think that was a fight. That didn’t exactly sound like a fight, but Kai was mad. He did screw up, he had said things he hadn’t meant because that’s what happened when he was under pressure. He doesn’t like to be wrong especially about the people closest to him and he refuses to believe that Zitao would do such a thing. Zitao doesn’t shy away from confronting people when he thinks they’re doing something stupid and Yixing wasn’t an exception. In fact Yixing got it worse because he was related to him.

Yixing slowly makes his way down the steps of Kai’s bedroom stairs still slightly dazed by the fight. His feet just barely touch the second floor when a door to his right opens. He watches as perfectly styled golden locks peeks out of the tiny crack in the door before lifting up and revealing Luhan’s smiling face. 

“Lay, Chanyeol told me you were here!” Yixing smiles apprehensively up at him, eyes straying back to the stairs. He wonders if Kai has already disappeared, gone somewhere where Yixing wouldn’t be able to find him. Did Yixing want to find him, was he supposed to? He had never gotten into a lovers’ quarrel before, never gotten angry over something so petty, and despite as childish as everything happened to be, he wasn’t ready to apologize. He wasn’t even sure what exactly he should be sorry about.

“You should come with us tomorrow,” Luhan tells him excitedly. Yixing focuses back on him but gets distracted again. He wonders if they’ll fix things. Couples usually made up after petty fights, but Kai and him had so much going on Yixing wouldn’t be surprised if Kai called it quits. Yixing was too much work, especially when compared to the other people that probably threw themselves at boy. “We’re going to the arcade and then dinner with probably a bit of shopping in between. You haven’t gone out with all five of us yet have you?”

“Not exactly,” Yixing mutters. “I don’t think I can go though.”

“What,” Luhan asks him, stepping outside of his room. “Why not? Is some something wrong?”

“I – Kai and I got into a fight,” Yixing explains slowly, fingers wring together as he avoids Luhan’s eyes. He can hear steps and part of him hopes that it’s Kai coming back.

“You what,” Luhan asks, stepping even closer to him. “Why, what was it about?”

Yixing opens his mouth to speak, slightly put off with the way Luhan’s voice turns hard, when Junmyeon comes up the steps and interrupts him. Junmyeon is grinning slightly at him and Yixing wonders if he’s really good at hiding his emotions, because despite the cold look his features might have his heart is beating loudly and his thoughts are a jumbled mess.

“You’re here even before me, Lay.” He casts a look from Yixing to Luhan and raises an eyebrow.  “What’s going on?”

“Lay got into a fight with Kai,” Luhan states, voice full of accusation as if he’s blaming. He’s not wrong, it is Lay’s fault but the tone he uses makes Yixing want to bow his head in shame. Yixing turns to face Luhan and sees a small frown on the boy’s lips. He watches as Luhan shuffles back and leans against the wall, arms crossed over his chest. “I was just about to find out what happened.”

Junmyeon moves forward, and places a hand on Yixing’s shoulder a small smile on his lips as he looks over to the boy. “We can talk about your fight in my room. You’re confused right?” Yixing nods his head slowly and turns to look back at Luhan while Junmyeon does the same.

“We’ll talk to you later hyung okay? I’ll help Lay figure things out.” Yixing watches as Luhan huffs softly but nods his head and heads back inside his bedroom.

“So what happened,” Junmyeon asks, when they’re both inside the boy’s room. Junmyeon’s slung his schoolbag to the ground beside his desk, and has taken a seat beside Yixing. “What was the fight about?”

“I don’t know,” Yixing states. “I mean I screwed up and I know that but I don’t get why it escalated to where it did. When I fight with my cousin there’s usually a lot more arguing that goes on till we’re both too frustrated to even look at each other. This wasn’t like that”

“Tell me what happened,” Junmyeon demands. “I won’t force advice down your throat, but I know Kai so I can help you fix this.”

Yixing is quiet for a moment, going over things in his head before he starts to speak, and then he begins telling Junmyeon about all the things he’d said and all the things Kai said to him. He finishes with a helpless “what should I do?”

“Kai’s frustrated,” Junmyeon tells him. “He can’t see you as much as he wants and you’re constantly sneaking around and even if he tries to be understanding about it, it still frustrates him. When your cousin was hogging all your time, I think he was really worried.”

“I missed him,” Yixing states. “I missed everyone but my cousin needed me. He just started dating our childhood friend and he doesn’t actually know how to act with him yet. They’ve had a bumpy start.”

“Your cousin doesn’t know about you and Kai,” Junmyeon asks.

“Zitao wouldn’t hide it if he knew,” Yixing tells him.

“Do you plan to tell him?”

“I do,” Yixing admits. “He’s gotten used to me seeing someone and not spending all my time with him. I want to slowly introduce the idea. You all kind of how he is, if I just outright tell him he’ll put up an even tougher fight.”

“Then do what you originally planned,” Junmyeon tells him. “When Kai calms down tell him that. You need to explain that you’re not hiding him because you want to.”

“He pushes me away a lot,” Yixing tells him. “When we’re in public sometimes he appears uncomfortable being with me. I thought not telling anyone right away was me doing what he wanted. He’s probably plotting to end things with me.”

Yixing throws himself back against Junmyeon’s bed, and Junmyeon laughs a little patting at his knee in a comforting manner. “He’s not going to end things with you over some little fight. If anything this is just him showing a new side of him.”

“What kind of side,” Yixing asks.

“The sensitive side,” Junmyeon states. “That kid’s really sensitive you know. Behind that whole bad boy act of his, he’s the type of person that brings home stray animals.”

Yixing pouts a little because he can actually see Kai smiling his rare little smile, while picking up stray puppies out of dogged down cardboard boxes on cold rainy days. He’s in way too deep, head over heels and back again to the point where he can’t tell up from down.

“Yeah well I’m not an abandoned animal. I’m just a whole bundle of complications after complications. I’d drop me if I was him.”

“ He’s not going to drop you or whatever. He’s just as complicated as you if not more so, you’re just a bit more ignorant to his flaws. You want to know something funny,” Junmyeon asks. “A small anecdote about Sehun and Luhan.”

“Sure,” Yixing states. He doesn’t know what it has to do with him, but he’s up for listening to Junmyeon. He shouldn’t wallow in self-pity.

“They broke up two weeks into dating. Luhan didn’t want to date the kid who used to come to him for bread back when they were children. He broke up with him, and moved out for a week. We were all walking on eggshells because that was the first time someone had spent such a long time out and alone since we all moved in together. Sehun had locked himself in Kai’s bedroom. Kai had to bring him food for the whole week.”

“They got back together though,” Yixing states.

“Yeah but they still fight sometimes, Sehun once stopped talking to Luhan for a whole day after Luhan let some girl at a restaurant give him her number.” Junmyeon states. “I’m almost as inexperienced as you but I can promise you that if you come tomorrow with us, you two will be okay.”

When Yixing gets home he finds Zitao waiting for him in the living room, watching an animated show on the television set.

“Where were you,” the younger asks.

“Where do you think,” Yixing asks, dryly. He literally feel like a married man with zero freedom. Zitao’s not his wife, and Kai is not his mistress. He shouldn’t have to document his whereabouts on a twenty-four hour basis, and if he decides he wants to spend time with Kai then he shouldn’t have to ask for permission first.

“You spend too much time with him,” Zitao tells him, “you haven’t even introduced him to me yet. How can you just expect me to accept someone I don’t know?”

“Didn’t we just have this conversation,” Yixing asks with a sigh. “You made me stop talking to Kris afterwards.”

“Well you kept promising to introduce me but you still haven’t,” Zitao huffs. “It’s been how long? Three months? Don’t you think it’s time to unravel the mystery? You don’t have to bring him back to China just at least let one of us meet him. ”

“Why don’t people just leave me alone for just one second so I can make my own decisions,” Yixing asks with a huff. “I’ll introduce you when I decide to do so, until then can’t you just trust my judgement? It’s tiring to continuously have this conversation, it won’t make me introduce him any faster.”

“Why not,” Zitao asks. “Why can’t I meet him? You’re acting really suspicious about this. Are you ashamed of him or me?”

“Why can’t it just be that I don’t want to introduce him,” Yixing asks, “Why do I have to be ashamed of anyone? Why can’t I just have this one thing, this one person, all to myself without anyone interfering or commenting or caring? Why am I not allowed to be happy too?”

Zitao doesn’t respond and Yixing takes deep breathes and leaves the living room. He avoids mirrors as he heads to his bedroom, he’s positive that his face is flushed red from frustration and he just wants to lay in bed and maybe sleep the annoyance away.

Yixing does sleep; he sleeps until his mother comes home and wakes him up and tells him to do homework. He does feel better, sleep moves all his problems to the back of his head, and his need to do math and science overwhelms those thoughts even more.

He takes a break when it’s dinner time, and his mother spends most of the time asking questions about their day. Yixing’s mother is a special kind of person, she doesn’t take one word answers to her questions, if she was a teacher not only would she expect you to restate the question in answer form but she would expect a paragraph at minimum. Yixing’s mother wasn’t a teacher though–thank God– she was a secretary at a firm all the way out in Incheon.

Yixing’s nervous, it’s not just the nervousness of going out with Kai and everyone else for the first time ever, there’s also the fact that he’d gotten into a fight with Kai less than 24 hours prior. They were all Kai’s friends before his and if Kai didn’t want to see him then it made sense that the others wouldn’t want to either. Luhan showed that Yixing’s side of things was not an option for them. They were all family and Yixing was just there intruding.

Yixing dresses quickly and then heads to Zitao’s room. “How do I look,” Yixing asks his younger cousin, twirling a bit like he’s at a fashion show. Zitao’s the fashion guru of the family, he has a keen sense of what looks good on a person, and Yixing would be stupid not to go to him when he was currently freaking out over every single thing at the moment. If everything else failed at least he’d look nice.

“Casual,” Tao states the obvious, Yixing had a love for v-necks and shirts that exposed his chest more than the regular t-shirt, Zitao thought he wore the clothes for fashion and even though Yixing did like to think he was a bit fashionable he liked the shirts for comfort mainly. “You look nice, you don’t need my advice. Are you going to meet him?”

“And his friends,” Yixing states, “I just really have to look nice today.”

“You do,” Zitao states. “I’m more than proud to call you my cousin, you’re extremely good-looking.”

“Thanks,” Yixing states with a bright grin.

He likes it when his cousin and him aren’t fighting. That’s how it’s supposed to be, Yixing and Zitao were liking siblings so it was natural to assume that they fought often like many siblings do, but Yixing and Zitao were also different. They both didn’t shy away from expressing their thoughts when they didn’t agree to what each other were doing or saying, but Yixing, who always tried to be understanding, tended to remain calm in situations where a fight could erupt. Zitao was a really sensitive kid so when they were younger so Yixing learned how to avoid making him cry, knowing that he’d feel bad for the rest of the day if he saw even just one tear in Zitao’s eyes.

“You seem nervous,” Zitao tells him.

“I am,” Yixing admits, taking a shaky breath. “I–I don’t really know why, it’s not like this my first time meeting them or anything. This isn’t anything special.”

“You look great,” Zitao compliments, “If they’re mean to you or say crap then their just y people.” Yixing laughs a little and thanks his cousin for the confidence boost before leaving the house. Yixing wishes that all his relationships were as easy as the one he had with his cousin. They didn’t need apologizes with each other. Zitao and him could make up with just puppy dog eyes, and stupid conversations.

Sehun notices him first when he’s walking up the block to the arcade. Yixing can tell Sehun’s noticed him because he looks up and quickly looks away, biting his lower lip as if he’s guilty of something. Sehun tends to cling to him, so Yixing can understand the guilty look, he’s probably closer to Kai than anyone else due to their age, and now he’s forced to ignore Yixing till Kai and him reconcile.

“Oh you came,” Luhan states when Yixing finally approaches the group. Kai doesn’t look in his direction, he’s closer to Luhan and Sehun and his eyes remain focused down on his cellphone.

“Is he the last one,” Chanyeol asks, turning towards Junmyeon.

“Unless you guys invited anyone else, Lay’s the last person,” Junmyeon answers, turning to Yixing to flash him a reassuring smile. Kim Junmyeon was the first friend of the same age he’d had in a long time, and even though they were born in the same year, Junmyeon still seemed older than him. Yixing doesn’t know if it’s just the grade gap but Junmyeon seems wiser than anyone he knows, not counting Kris.

Yixing doesn’t know the first thing when it comes to apologizing to someone that isn’t family and more than just a friend or acquaintance. He can’t just say sorry, or ‘I apologize’ and expect everything to be alright.

“So you want to stand outside all day,” he hears and Yixing nearly drops in a 90 degree bow in apology.

“I’m sorry,” he breathe out, he forces himself to look up into Kai’s amused eyes, and when Kai grins, his secret little grin  that speaks of tales untold Yixing can’t help but sigh from the relief bubbling inside his stomach.

“I know,” Kai tells him. “I know what you meant yesterday. You love me right?”

“Of course,” Yixing states. “You’re the only person I’ve ever loved.” Kai then grins brighter, and Yixing’s not sure if he hates himself or if he hates Kai for making him feel the way he does.

Yixing would be lying if he said he’s never been to an arcade before. He’s a teenager, and the arcade used to be one of his favorite places when he was in middle school and had first started high school.

Yixing doesn’t have a game he specializes in, he’s good at a few and he’s more than happy when he beats Junmyeon and Sehun at a few games. Luhan and Chanyeol are a bit harder to beat and Yixing feels like the arcade must be a second home to them. KaI only challenges him at one game, it’s a racing game, and Yixing loses in second place, barely beating out the computer generated opponent.

Hours later when they run out of tokens and games to play they go get dinner. There was a photobooth inside the arcade and Sehun made it a point to take pictures which each person in the group, and as they headed off to the restaurant he continued staring down at the newly taken pictures, figuring out the ones he liked most and the ones he was willing to give to the others.

The restaurant is filled with people. Yixing figures it’s because it’s a Saturday night and the restaurant is located in a district near many colleges. They don’t have to wait long to find a seat, and Yixing stays in the back with Kai as they head off to their booth table.

“Yixing,” he thinks he hears someone calling over the chatter of strangers and Yixing lazily lifts his gaze to look around. He doesn’t see anyone familiar and is about to start walking again when his full name is said even louder.

He turns his head and sees Kris hovering above the strangers in the room. Yixing has to squint and when he does he sees Kris in the black vest, black slacks, and white buttoned shirt that is waiter attire. Kris went to school at Yonsei University, and worked part-time in a restaurant within the area. Of all the restaurants in the area Yixing had to go to the one Kris worked at. Of all times to go, Yixing had to go during Kris’s shift.

Yixing tells the others to go ahead and he walks over to his childhood friend. Kris doesn’t appear angry, he just looks on, waiting for Yixing to come to him.

“Is that the guy,” Kris asks.

“Which one,” Yixing asks, turning back to the table, where everyone is sitting. There’s a spot beside Chanyeol open.

“The one with the dark hair,” Kris states, “the slightly tanned one you were walking beside.”

“Yeah,” Yixing breathes out.

“They’re those kids,” Kris states. “The ones that Tao doesn’t like.”

“Yeah,” Yixing says again even though he knows it’s not a question.

“You’re going to tell him right,” Kris asks. “I won’t mention anything because you should tell him, and you will, won’t you? It’ll if he hears it from someone else.”

“I’ll tell him,” Yixing says slightly defeated.

“Soon,” Kris presses. “Even if Tao doesn’t like them, you still need to tell him. When you keep him secret it’s like you’re ashamed.”

“I know,” Yixing huffs. “I’m not ashamed I’m just worried.”

“Talk to him,” Kris says. “When you do, I’ll help you. Tao, he’s your cousin, he loves you and he only cares about protecting you since you’re such a nice person. If you explain things he might protest it for a bit but he’ll accept it eventually.”

“I know,” Yixing says again. He knows, he knows, but he’s still worried.

“You should go back,” Kris tells him. “They’re probably waiting for you. We can talk later.” Yixing nods his head like a reprimanded child refusing to speak after being scolded. He mumbles a goodbye and heads back to the table.

“Who was that,” Chanyeol asks, whining softly when someone possibly kicks him underneath the table. Yixing laughs a little, and grabs one of the menus in front of him.

“My childhood friend,” Yixing answers.

“The one that might be in love with you,” Kai asks, eyes peering over the top of the menu, searching for the waiter. “Can we have a waiter?”

“He’s not in love with me,” Yixing states. “He’s dating my cousin.”

“Because he can’t have you,” Kai states drily.

“Because he likes my cousin, not me,” Yixing retorts. The waiter comes a moment later and Yixing’s more than happy about the interruption. He’d just gotten over one fight and he didn’t want to get into a second one so soon.

Here's a really long chapter so don't bother me for the rest of the week XD But really guys this is really long, like it just turned into this monster chapter without my permission. No real drama yet just a little bit of resolvable teenage angst.