*MINJI’S POV*

 

    It was a saturday and the first day of winter break. I could already picture staying up late watching movies, drinking hot chocolate, and playing in the snow and I planned to make it the best out of it the time I had

           

I took the bus to their apartment building and made my way up. Coming here seemed to be natural now, like going to Myungsoo’s house. I passed the door, said hello to the concierge, and entered the elevator- pressing their floor number without a second look. 

The elevator made a ringing sound when it reached the floor I was headed for. I stepped out, walked to their door and knocked. 

“Come in” I recognized Sungjong’s voice. I pulled the door open, a little surprised they didn’t lock it considering their sasaeng fans. But then again, they probably wouldn’t live here anymore if they knew where they lived, right? 

Four boys sat in the living room, their thumbs and fingers furiously moving- clicking and rolling the buttons on their controllers. I took a seat, watching them play a game I had no knowledge of. 

"Where's Myungsoo Oppa?", I asked keeping my eyes on the screen. 

"Sleeping, still. Along with Sunggyu." Woohyun walked out of the hallway. "I'm a bit hurt. Weren't you wondering where I was?", he cutely pouted, placing his two hands beneath his chin.

"Nope."

"Yah", he retained his manly composure. "You couldn't just play along? How cruel",  he took his seat beside me on the floor. I laughed and ruffled his hair. He responded with a smile and squinted eyes. I checked the time; 11:54. I stood from my seat and dusted myself off. 

"Yah! Where are you going? I just took a seat here", Woohyun tried to bring me back. 

"I'm gonna wake Myungsoo up. It's almost twelve and he's still sleeping", I scowled. 

"Aish,  always worried about Myungsoo. Are you secretly in love with him or something", he wagged his finger at  me. 

"Yah! Oppa!  How could you say that? I've seen him with missing teeth!" I argued. Woohyun laughed loudly, holding his chest as he did so. I smiled to myself and made my way into his room.

When I entered, I found that Sunggyu slept beside him. It boggled my mind that Myungsoo slept here when he had his own warm home. Before I could even try to wake Myungsoo up, I decided to wake Sunggyu up first. It wasn't any better for his health either. He awoke with not much of a problem.

I shook Myungsoo's shoulder furiously but to no prevail. His hair fell infront of his eyes and his fingers sort of twitched. I yelled in his ear, kicked his back, and even held his nose, yet he didn't awaken. Relying on my last resort, I stood up and walked to the nearest bathroom. I filled a plastic cup with water and made my way back to his room. I stared at his peaceful figure for a while, trying my best to remember this image of him. I tipped over the cup and let it spill over his head. He immediately shot up, reminding me of a cat. 

"Rise and shine", I smiled.

"Yah!", he shook his hair, wetting me a bit. A bit of the water shaken off contacted my skin, sending a small chill throughout my body. His breath was a bit heavy. He was angry but he was nothing close to intimidating. 

"Just go change and come out to the living room. Even Sunggyu is up!"

and with a small grumble, he got up, changed,  and made his way to the living room. 

 

 

My fingers fidgeted with the buttons on the controller. Honestly, I had no idea what I was doing, but pressing random buttons isn't that bad of a method. Beside me, an eager boy's eyes remanined on the screen. His charismatic eyes made him more intimidating. His tongue was slighty sticking out from between his lips. Another boy sat behind me, cheering me on while trying to inform me about different combos. My character's life was nearly gone now. 

"Aish, Oppa. I have no idea how to do this!", I whined to my supporter. 

"Here", He stuck out palm.

"hm?", I questioned, continuing to press random buttons while staring at the screen. 

"Tag team", Hoya smiled. I quickly handed him the controller and slid to the side of him to get out of his way. 

"Yah! That's not fair, I was challengingMinji, not you! ", Myungsoo whined, his eyes still glud to the screen.

"Well neither is playing against someone who doesn't have any knowledge of the game", Hoya smirked. His fingers moved quickly, initiating combos and moves. He quickly brought Myungsoo's health level down and the game was becoming more intense. However, in the end, Myungsoo won. Of course, it was thanks to the first half of the round.

But that fact didn't affect his attitude. 

"You have to cook me food!", he pointed and wiggled his finger at me. I stuck my tongue out at him, cursed,and turned to walk away. "Minji-ah, don't be like that."

Suddenly, I felt his arms around my shoulders, dangling loosely. I could hear the snickers from a few of the older members.

"Aish, this kid", scowled and pulled away. "Nothing for you", I scolded.

 

 

*MYUNGSOO'S POV*

 

"Nothing for you", she tried to scold. Of course, it was nowhere near menacing. With a long puppy face, she finally gave in. She walked over to the fridge, took a peak inside, and quickly shut the door. 

"How do you expect me to cook when there's nothing in the fridge!", she questioned.

"Ah, we don't eat much meals at home. Usually, we eat out or at L's house", Sungyeol scratched the back of his head. 

"This won't do." She leaned on her right leg, her hip slightly sticking out. She clucked her tongue, slightly shook her head, then clapped her hands together. "Give me money."

"Bwo?", I scoffed. 

"I need to go grocery shopping. But I don't have money", she shook in her place, sticking out her palm. "Pali!", she screamed. Somehow, her yell made me react. I reached into my pocket, took out my wallet and handed it to her.Only when it was in her possession did i realize what i'd done. 

"Thank you, Oppa", she smiled and hugged me. I hugged here back and the feeling of regret dissapeared. Her height made it easy to hug her. She pulled away and giggled. In my head, her giggle played over and over again. I loved the sound of it. 

"I'll be back", she announced. Before she could pull the door open, a body shot up.

      "I'm coming with you." He picked up his jacket and stepped towards the door, opening it for her.

      "Ah, Oppa, it's okay. I can go on my own. I don't want your fans bothering you or seeing us together", she grabbed his hand away from the handle. 

"I'm coming. I'm just going to throw some glasses on." He ran into his room and returned within a few seconds. "Alright, let's go", he smirked. Minji looked up at him, shook her head and gave in. He opened the door for her like any gentlemen and she walked through the door like any other women would. I watched her back-her hair swaying with every step she took- until Hoya walked through the door, blocking my view of her. I could see the very tip of her head if I looked past his shoulder. He let go of the door, and I watched the door slowly close as I let her leave with another man. 

   

    *HOYA'S POV*

The air was cold and sharp, but I felt warm because she was beside me. Every step we took was farther from the apartment than the last and I felt sort of glad for leaving. We were both silent as we walked to the elevator. The silence wasn't an awkward silence, but more of a comfortable one; neither of us needed to say a word. For me, just being at her side was enough, and as we took a step into the elevator, I couldn't help but wonder if she felt the same way too. 

 

The walk to the grocery store was cold but not frigid. Infact, it was warm and enjoyable, like a cup of hot chocolate. Her smile was my fireplace in this cold weather. Her laughter was the blanket that added to the warmth. And I couldn't help but wish my laugh and my smile could provide that kind of aid for her. 

   "You ready for the winter benefit?", I randomly asked. In a few days, our acting class would be showcasing a bundle of skits. We were all seperated into groups and made to perform a skit. 

"Sort of.  But we'll see on the performing day", she shrugged and strolled into the market. The air became warmer almost instantly after I took a step in. her hair began to frizz and wave but I still thought she looked beautiful. I pulled out a cart and she held one side while I held the other and together we pushed the cart and for a moment I forgot about infinite and Myungsoo and school. For a moment it was just the girl beside me and the people in the store. For a moment, she was mine. Or at least I pretended so. But moments, as everyone knows, don't last very long. And this one, only lasted for a couple minutes. And it was wonderful and great and almost magical, but it didn't last long enough. Before we could even past the magazines set up in the front of the store, we ran into him. Jaehwa. 

He was wearing a heavy coat and jeans. His hair wasn't gelled and he looked almost innocent- but I knew he wasn't. On instinct, I slipped my hand into hers and squeezed it for reassurance. She looked up at me scrunched her nose and slightly shook her head.

  Don't worry about it.

  That's what she was trying to say.

But I needed to worry- because he loved her too. It was clear to me. It wasn't even the fact he bothered her so much or changed his moods around her so radically. It wasn't the fact he gave her ice cream for hurting her feelings or randomly became nicer to her recently. It wasn't even the fact he has asked her to dance last weekend and was almost angry when she left him on the dance floor. No. It was the way he looked at her that gave it away. They way his eyes changed depending on what she'd say. How his intense stare could turn into a soft, sincere one within a matter of seconds. It was the way her words or actions could turn his stare from angry to devastated. It was the way he looked only at her despite the people around them. And I could only wonder how Minji managed to steal the heart of not only Myungsoo's and mine's, but his as well. 

But Jaehwa was a whole lot of bad. If Myungsoo and I didn't deserve her, he didn't deserve even her friendship. But she see's something in him, I know it. Some beacon of hope that he can change and although I honestly could never picture that happening, I'll let her try to change him. Because if she honestly see's a light in him, there must be something there. 

"Ah, it's the two lover birds", he smirked and put his hands into his coat pocket. "How's your break? gone on any dates, yet?"

"Actually, we're on one right now. Buying grocercies to cook dinner", I coldly stated.

"Ah, one of those cliche` things. Like a korean drama", he took a step toward us. 

"By the way, i'm really looking forward to see your guys' performance", he smiled.

"Your going?", Minji asked. 

"Yeah. Mother said I had too. But at least I have a performace actually looking forward too. I'm bringing a date with me. I wouldn't mind you guys meeting her." His tone of voice was different when he spoke to Minji.

"Well, we have to go. We're going to try to cook dinner before the members get home", I pushed the cart forward a bit and smiled a toothless smile.

"Okay", he walked forward and slowed down beside me. It was fast and faint, but I heard him. He whispered, "this game ends in a few nights", he walked towards the exit of the grocery store. I don't know what, but something snapped. Minji slightly walked forward, but I walked towards the exit. Before he could take  step out, I pulled him back and held his collar. 

"Say it again", I demanded. "Say it again, ."

"A little bit agitated about your girl, huh? Don't worry, i'll bring another one for you", he smirked. He ing smirked. And just then, all my anger boiled up and I shut out all the watching eyes and gasps. I raised my fist, allowing all the hate to flow to it. From the moment he tried to drag her to his car. From the moment he caused that dispute in the hallway. From the moment  he started this whole damnn war- I felt all of that anger flow towards my fist. But suddenly I felt her arms around mine as it hovered over Jaehwa's head. She was tip-toeing.

"Don't do it, oppa. Please", she softly said, her voice cracking a bit. I looked into her eyes and I saw fear. Worry. And I couldn't help but wonder if she was a bit disappointed in me. I could ignore the whispers going around and the stares I got, but not her. Not her. And so I lowered my fist, nodded, and held her face between my hands.

"Okay, i'm sorry", I whispered. "I'm sorry for scaring you." and then she shut her eyes and hugged me. It was warm and I realized that she's never really hugged me before. Not like this.

I've kissed her cheek and held her hand, but none of those could compare to her hug. None of them were as warm or sincere as this moment. 

"It's okay", she shakely whispered. I looked up at Jaehwa, who was staring at us. His eyes were sort of sad and he looked sort of defeated and suddenly I didn't  have the strength to even yell at him anymore. 

"Go."

and he left.

 

*JAEHWA'S  POV*

I was wrong. He does love her. His feelings for her are sincere. And something told me her feelings for him was sincere too. And I felt a bit angry and unjustified. Because how could the world be so cruel? How could it be that the person someone's heart belonged to loved someone else? The game ends here. So, on performance night you better be prepared- Lee Howon.

 

*NARRATOR'S POV*

They walked through the isles silently, staring at the dairy products. Minji had nothing to say. Hoya didn't know what he should've said. 

  "I-", Hoya stuttered, raising his hand and dropping it quickly. He sighed in frustration. "I-", he stuttered again and shut his mouth, a bit more irritated at his failed attempt. He walked away, ruffling his hair. Behind him, Minji pushed the cart and slightly chuckled. 

"I'm not mad at you", she yelled across to him. He stopped in his tracks and twirled around. 

  "You're not?"

"You didn't hit him. Why would I be mad?"

"I almost hit him."

"Yeah, but you didn't. You got a bit lost in your anger. So what. You're human", she walked away from the cart. "But something changed your mind. So it's okay."

 It was you. He thought.

 

  Hoya ran, jumped on the back of the cart, and let it roll into the frozen aisle. He jumped off, acting as a break, and brought the cart to a stop. He left the cart, ran to the door beside it, and opened it. 

"Yah! You should've slowed down for me!", Minji came racing behind.

"Ah, Mian", he chuckled, pulling out a tub of ice cream. 

  "Chocoloate for the rest of the members", he tossed over the first tub of ice cream to Minji, "and green tea ice cream for us two", he smiled. 

    "Isn't that a bit un-proportionate?"

   "Fine. One more tub chocolate ice cream for the members", he tossed another. 

  

 

  They walked in the snow, returning back to the apartment. It was a very soft fall of snow. They walked the pathway behind tall buildings, blocking them from the main roads and watchful eyes. It was nice- peaceful. The package that held their ice cream was leaning on Minji's leg. As they continued to walk, the cold became unbearable. 

"Aish, so cold", she stopped and rubbed her leg. 

"What's wrong?", Hoya stopped behind her and asked. 

"The ice cream", she rubbbed her leg faster for more warmth. "it's leaning on my leg."

"Aigoo, this girl", Hoya took the package out of her hand. "I'll just hold everything." He stuck his tongue out at her and walked ahead. Minji chuckled and jogged to catch up to him.

"Such a gentlemen", she teased and poked his cheek. He smiled at her and she smiled back and they felt a weird warm feeling inside their stomaches, but they liked it. 

They simultaniously looked at the ground, watching their own feet move foward. Suddenly, Minji crouched down and picked up a small portion of snow. She pressed it onto Hoya's cheek and ran ahead.

"You've just been kissed by the snow princess!", she yelled behind her.

Hoya chased after her, failing to catch up to her. It was difficult to run with groceries in hand.

Soon enough, they arrived at the apartment building- a bit earlier than they wanted.

 

 

*MINJI'S POV*

 

 I laughed one final time before pulling open the apartment door. Honestly, it was nice to be with Hoya. 

 "Yah, you guys take forever! What's for dinner?", Dongwoo rolled off the couch ad walked towards us. The first thing he did was take the groceries out of Hoya's hand and search through the bag. The rest of the members crowded around him as I walked towards the kitchen, pulling out pots and utensils. 

  "Manduguk?", Woohyun looked up at me. 

  "Yup."

   "Ah, jincha? I want to help cook!", Woohyun ran over to me. I patted his head and nodded.

   "Me too. I want to help too", Myungsoo walked over and pushed Woohyun aside. Jincha, these boys are really weird.

 

  So we started. Me and Myungsoo worked on the dumplings and Woohyun worked on the broth. Myungsoo and I sat at the kitchen table, our own work laid infront of us. 

  We stared at eachother with intense glares. 

  "Hana"

  "Du"

  "Set!", we exclaimed in unision.

  Both of our fingers worked furiously on the mandus. He was quick but i was skilled. 

  "Done!",

  I exclaimed, brushing my hands on my apron. He looked at me with his mouth gapping open, and threw his unfinished work onto his cutting board. 

  "Yah! I'm not a good cook anyway. You do it", he walked away and I laughed and he looked back at me smiled and I couldn't help but smile too. 

 

  After dinner Myungsoo took me home and for a little while, we sat in my house, staring out the window and watching the snow fall. 

  "How's your leg?", he asked, breaking the silence. 

  "Good. I mean, I can't run yet, but it's good", I replied. And we stayed silent for another moment, just enjoying each other's company. And then he got up, walked over to the tree my mother had decorated so precisely, and sat. He rummaged through my gifts and stopped when he found one- neatly wrapped with snowflake wrapping paper and a black bow. 

  "You should've made the whole wrapping black", he scrunched his nose as he turned it in his hands as if he could figure out what was in the wrapped box- his present. "What is it?", he asked, giving up and putting the present back underneath the tree. 

  "You'll just have to wait and see", I smiled and put his present in a pile with 6 other boxes. 

  "I got the other members a gift", I said. 

  "And i'm guessing this one's Hoya's?", he asked with one eyebrow raised, holding a reindeer designed wrapped present with a purple. 

  "You're guess would be correct", I answered, grabbing it out of his hands and setting it back in the pile. 

  "You and him got pretty close, huh?", he asked, leaning back, using his two arms to support him. 

  "Yeah", I nodded. "We did."

  "Do you like him?", he asked nonchalantly. It was smooth and quick and it made me pause for a moment to make sure I heard him correctly. He looked at me, waiting for an answer. There was no sign of urge or desperation in his stare and it made me wonder wether he cared or if he had just suspected it. And suddenly it hurt me that it didn't bother him. Yet, there really was no reason for him to be bothered. 

  I remained silent and he patiently waited with the same bored expression as if this was a simple, meaningless question. As if the answer was easy. As if a yes was simple and a no was even simpler.

  And it might've been, if I didn't like Hoya. But I did. I liked the way he made me feel comfortable and he cared about me and was there for me. I liked him for all the same reasons I like Myungsoo, despite how different their personalities came off. 

 And I knew I had to tell him the truth. But I couldn't tell him I liked him too. 

 Suddenly, he chuckled and leaned forward again, raising his knees to his chest. 

  "I was kidding. You don't have to be so tense", he nudged me. "My poker face is pretty believable huh?", he smiled and switched his gaze to the tree.

 "I do."

He suddenly looked back at me, his smile fading away.

 "I do like Hoya."

  And I like you too. 

 

*MYUNGSOOS POV*

 Somehow, our conversation was about Hoya. I wondered what she got him as I looked at the wrapping. She took it out of my hand and placed it down.

  I leaned back and I commented that they've become closer and she replied that they had with a smile on her face and right then I sort of felt this ignorant anger and I wanted to know so badly and so I asked, 

 "Do you like him?", without an expression. Without any anger or sense of humor. 

  And even though I didn't show it on my face, I was quite confused as to why I asked her that. 

 Was it because I wanted to genuinly know? 

  And suddenly, I realized I really didn't want to know. I didn't want to hear those words escape her lips. 

  And so I leaned forward and said, 

 "I was kidding. My poker face is pretty believable huh?", and looked back to the tree. And I felt fine and relieved but suddenly she said, 

  "I do."

  And I knew what she was talking about but I looked back at her, my smile gone, and stared at her as if I wanted her to continue. As if it didn't bother me. As if I had forgotten what i'd asked.

  "I do like Hoya."

 The second sentence hurt more than the first and I suddenly wished I had responded instead of letting her say another sentence. Because an 'I do' was better than 'I do like Hoya.' Because at least if she finished at 'I do.', I could forget what those two words stood for versus 'I do like Hoya.' Because I could at least sleep at night without as much of a bother hearing 'I do.' than 'I do like Hoya.' 

  "I told you that you I was kidding", I smirked playfully as if I honestly was. As if I didn't already know what her answer was before she even spoke. As if she'd take it back and I could pretend she was kidding too if I classified it as a joke. As if it could change the fact she loved me not.

  "I know. But I wasn't", she said. And it hurt. It made the pain worse. Still, I played it off as if I didn't care. As if I wasn't inlove with her. 

  "Does he like you too?", I asked. Of course, I already knew he did. But I just needed to know if she knew. 

  "No. I don't think so." At this point, I didn't know how to repsond.

 As her bestfriend, I should care. I should feel bad. As a caring man I should encourage her to go after him despite how much it hurt me. But as a selfish man, I felt sort of glad she didn't know. Because it gave me time. It gave me a chance. 

  "Oh.", I simply replied. And it was an honest reply. Because at this point, I really didn't know how to respond. And then she got up and looked at the time and said, 

  "It's late. You have a busy schedule this week. You should get home and rest", she said and grabbed my hand and pulled me up.

  "Ah, is it really?", I checked my watch and realized it was. But I kind of didn't want to go. I wanted to make her smile and forget we even had that conversation. I wanted to be sure i'd be leaving her house with her smiling. I wanted to be sure she'd go to bed at night without any ache in her heart. And I couldn't help but feel guilty for putting that pain there. Yet, maybe it was best for me to leave. And so i got up and walked to the door and said,

  "Goodnight, Minji. Sleep tight", and closed the door behind me.

 

 *MINJI'S POV* 

  He walked to the door and slowly opened it. Before taking a step out he said,

     "Goodnight, Minji. Sleep tight", and closed the door behind him. 

  And I couldnt tell wether he was hurt or hapt for me or if he honestly didn't care.

  And that made me a bit mad. 

   Asking him to be angry as a man was too much, I knew. Asking him to be jealous was selfish. 

  But as my bestfriend, I expected him to have some kind if repsonse. But he didn't.

  But as a woman, I understood that he didn't need to respond. In the circumstances that he didn't actually intend for me to answer, he was completely entitled to how he responded. And so it was okay. But it still didn't stop the pain. It still didn't change that fact that he didn't love me.