Kai is tired of all this.

 

Even if it seems like Kris hasn’t returned to school yet, Kai has the feeling he’s still there, spying on him, Baekhyun and Kyungsoo and taking note of every single thing they do. It scares the out of him, but he has to deal with that, hoping Kris only wants Kyungsoo… and not him. Sometimes he feels like he’s been too harsh with ex-best friend. Maybe Kyungsoo doesn’t deserve all that. But Kai won’t go back, he knows that.

 

‘Let’s just concentrate on the present and try our best to forget the past.’

 

It has been a while since the three of them came back to school and everything seems to slowly come back to normal. Well, except them. They will never be like before, ever. But in a way, it doesn’t matter. As long as they try to be happy again, as long as they try to forget that and just live normally, as long as-

 

"Oh ing ! Why can’t you ing leave me alone?" Kai groans when he opens his locker and finds a (too) familiar little paper in it.

 

Ever since the first three little posts-it, Kris never let him go, harassing him with so many messages. He even called him once, but Kai just hung up before Kris could possibly throw some insults at him or whatever he wanted to say.. again. But now Kai is tired of all this. He was able to ignore it for a while but now, he knows that his façade won’t last for very long. Kai has to go see Kris, maybe talk to him and it’ll make everything stop, or at least he hopes so.

 

-----

 

Kai slowly walks on the main street, looking left and right more often than he needs to. He had taken the opportunity to meet Kris when that little message had appeared in his locker.

 

‘Let’s meet in that same alley we first talked, okay? Don't worry, I'll try not to be too harsh on you this time...’

 

Now here he is, slowly approaching that same alley as all the memories of that night come back to his mind.

 

"But you see, the problem is, he doesn't love her back. So she's hurt too, she's heartbroken too. And that hurts you to see her like that don't you? And it hurts me to see my little sister like that, too."

 

"Shut up."

 

Kai closes his eyes. He has to stay in control. He knows how sensible he is with that. His vision gets blurry, he sees red everywhere. But he can’t fall because of Kris. He has to stay in control..

 

Kris laughs and ignores him again, walking around Kai, his hands behind his back.

 

"I don't understand how you can stay calm like that even if your best friend is hurting her. I would kill that bastard and I'd really like to, if only Clary didn't like him..." Kris finally looks at Kai, stops walking and smiles evily. "Don't you want to do that, too?" Kai’s eyes widen for a second, but his eyes soon become sharp again.

 

"He's my best friend, Kris. I'd never act as low as you and hurt him. No, instead I would comfort her, cuz that's what a friend would do." Kris laughs and rolls his eyes.

 

"Ooh Kai Kai Kai.. You don’t understand.. You know that's not enough. Why don't you push that away and take her! I know you'd want to.."

 

Kai laughs at himself, at how naive he was back then. Even if it only all happened about one month ago, for him, it seems like it’s been a lot more. However he still doesn’t know if he should go back there again. Last time, it cost Clary’s life. Is Kai's visit going to cost them another life?

 

He finally arrives at the said alley and walks in. He walks a few more meters into the shadows until his eyes meet Kris’ body leaning against on the wall. As soon as he sees him, Kris smiles and walks to Kai.

 

"Do you remember this place, Kai? When you told me you'd be strong and that you'd never do anything to your dear friend?" Kris laughs and Kai closes his eyes. He remembers it pretty well, he probably always will. Kris smirks and continues. "I knew you wouldn't be as strong as you wanted to when we met last time. So you finally know how it feels, huh? It feels bad, no? It feel like you've been torn apart and destroyed like a-"

 

"SHUT UP!" This time, Kai just can’t hold it and yells at Kris, who laughs at Kai’s reaction.

 

"Aww, don’t be like last time, would you? I know how it feel, you want to kill him, you too? You want to make him feel the pain? WHY DON’T YOU ING KILL HIM!" It’s Kris’ time to yell, now.

 

Kai clenches his fists again. This feels too much like last time. But he’ll stay in control today. Today he’ll be different because he knows what could happen. He’s not going to let Kris win again. He won’t.

 

"I said shut up! I won't kill anyone! I’m not as low as you, I already told you that! I… just want to make him feel how I feel! I want him to feel pain! Not physical pain, but emotional pain… That’s even worse, I guess. Now just let go of me! I don’t ever want to talk to you anymore! Leave me alone! I’m not a crazy bastard like you. "

 

With that, Kai walks away before his anger can take control. Maybe he looks like a wimp but he doesn’t care. He didn’t even have time to say everything he wanted to say to Kris.

 

Oh well… He just hopes he’ll be satisfied for long enough with what he actually said. He hopes. While Kai walks away, Kris rolls his eyes and turns back to lean on the wall again.

 

"Not as low as me, huh? You still wanna hurt him, though. Oh stupid bastard, I won’t leave you alone until I'm done with you. You were in that car too. You deserve to die just as much as your little friend."

 

-----

 

"So yeah… I just ran away after that, left him alone in that alley. I knew I shouldn't stay anyways.. Who knows what might have happened.."

 

Kai finally stops talking and looks at Baekhyun in front of him, who has a poker face ever since Kai began to tell him everything that happened with Kris the other night. They both stay silent for a while, Kai looking down because he just can’t face Baekhyun who is looking at him intensely, his chin in his hand.

 

After at least one of two minutes of death silence, Baekhyun sighs heavily and leans back on his chair. His dining room never felt so awkward since the night Clary and Kyungsoo left to search for Kai.

 

"You’re ing stubborn, you know that?" Baekhyun suddenly break the silence and Kai slowly moves his head up to face his friend. He groans and lets his head fall on the table. "I told you to stop talking to me about-"

 

"Yah! Don’t you even understand!? What you just told me right there is another reason to help Kyungsoo since Kris probably wants to kill you too!" Baekhyun almost yells at Kai, standing up but slowly sitting down again as he sighs. "Why are you so determined to ignore him?" He says with a softer voice. "I-I don’t understand.."

 

Kai raises his head and look at his friend with a piercing gaze. He’s almost mad… almost.

 

"Well I don’t even understand myself, okay? I’m just doing that because that’s what my heart asks me to do! I’m doing that because I know that if I go back with him, each time I’ll see him will be like a shot in the heart! He reminds me of Clary, Baekhyun. And yes, even after a month I still love her as much as I did before she.. before she went away.. And you can’t ing change me! You decided to come with me, but I won’t tolerate you longer if you’re just here to try to convince me! You’re with him or you’re with me, there’s no other possibilties, Baekhyun."

 

"Fine. Fine! You know what? I give up. I ing give up! You’re happy now? You’re a ing retard. You seriously need to sit down, shut your ing mouth up and think about what exactly you’re trying to accomplish here. Are you satisfied with what you ing caused? Are you? ARE YOU ING HAPPY NOW? Well I hope you are. Cuz I’m not. It hurt me, it ing hurt me Jong In! You understand what I said? Or are you just too concentrate on your little broken heart to care about your friends? We're all in pain, Kai. But you can't even see it! You became ing blind! Blind to the point where you don't care about us anymore!" Baekhyun takes a deep breath and stands up, looking at Kai with a piercing gaze. "I hope you're happy. I hope you're ing happy with everything you've done. Because I'm not." With that, Baekhyun just walks away.

 

He knows he shouldn’t give up on him or open his heart as he just did but Kai is stuck on his idea and that's getting on Baekhyun's nerves. He knows he went a little too far but he knows that he did the right thing.

 

Now, the only thing he’s worried about is what’s going to happen after this.

 

‘As long as you don’t kill him, at least, I’ll try to be ok with that…’

 

 

 

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Author's note

 

OHHHH I'm so sorry for the late update! But yeah I slowly begin to run out of chapters... THINK MARIIIE THINK! So yeah here's a little chapter for you guys^^

I usually don't say that but.......... please don't forget to comment or subscribe or anything? Comments are always appreciated:D Since I'd like to know what you guys think about the story so far..... :)

Thanks youu!

Mariiie