Chapter 12

 

Hold Me

 

I shouldn't say it, but I'm starting to think I care

I've had a drink, you probably think my judgement isn't clear

And it's getting late now, we're a long way from our homes

Before you leave, before you grieve, there's one thing you should know

 

When you hold me, when you hold me in your arms

 Oh when you hold me, yeah I can feel your heart

When you hold me, when you hold me in your arms

Oh when you hold me, yeah I can feel your heart beating

 

Tom Odell; Long Way Home

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I've never been raised to be such an arrogant little brat like what people commonly believe about me, a usual assumption whenever they figure out what family I came from.  As a child, I was raised at my grandparents’ house, a beautiful country style house at a small town near Gangnam.  Since my parents were so busy running the family company in France, it was my grandparents who really bore so much input in to my upbringing.  I was given much freedom to run around, usually with nana Hye Mi and Jingyo, and play around in the wide vast land my grandparents own.  To say that my childhood was just as simple as the other children would be something that would make the people do double flips.  I would remember picking fruits and flowers outside by morning then go watch the ahjusshis take care of my haraboji's favorite horses, possibly even ride them after much pleading or pouting.  I wasn't spoiled with brand new accessories or clothes but rather objects that are handmade by my very artistic halmoni.  She was the one that got me inspired in vintage and painting canvases from artists around the globe; she's also probably the source of all my artistic genes.  

 

 

I love my grandparents so much that's why when my haraboji died I felt like I've lost my own father.  I cried all day at the stables, holding a phone towards my ear, listening to Jingyo's comforting words.  He was already at France that time and all he could do was talk to me for hours even though the time back in Paris was past midnight, I guess that's why talking to Jingyo's halmoni makes me feel this sense of nostalgia on the days of my happy childhood. 

 

 

"Eat some more," she says encouragingly at us like we haven't eaten all those bread puddings and sweet delicacies she offered earlier. 

 

 

"Minji-ah, get those fruit cakes I bought yesterday," she orders at Jingyo's cousin who gets up for what I count is the fourth time today.  I was quick to stop her as I look at my companions, mouths full and eyes wide.

 

 

"Halmoni, no need to, we're already full, thank you!" I say smiling at her, my words instantly making Minji pause. 

 

 

"Hush child, you need to taste it, the fruit cake here is like no other!  People from the city come here just to buy it,"

 

 

As expected of a grandmother.  I saw that coming actually.  My own halmoni is also keen to spoil her guests with food, even me.  That's why I gain weight whenever I am left under their care so it's safe to say that I have been trying to keep those slightly chubby pictures of little me kept in a very dark place, never to be viewed ever again.

 

 

Needless to say, I was guilty to see Jingyo's halmoni sad at my refusal so I was quick to give in.

 

 

"Minji-ah, I'll help you," I say to the girl as she gives me a smile and waits for me to catch up to her.  The kitchen was really small but it smelled really good.  I just found out that Jingyo's halmoni cooks delicious meals every time any of her children or grandchildren arrive.

 

 

"Oppa talks about you a lot." Minji suddenly tells me as she opens the fridge.

 

 

"Really? I hope he only says nice things then," I say with a laugh.

 

 

"Don't worry unnie, oppa made sure that we never believe those nasty rumors about you, besides one look at you and I couldn’t believe how much they exaggerate their stories," she says as she takes the cake and places it on top of the counter, ready to slice it for us.  I quickly made myself useful and offered to do it.

 

 

"Because of oppa, I think I know you a lot more than most people. I know things about you that the media doesn't," Minji suddenly says as I look back at her, a bit surprised at her statement.  This 15 year old cousin of oppa's seems to be very straightforward, a trait Jingyo also has whenever he believes something is troubling me.

 

 

"And what are those things?" I challenged her as she rest her chin on the palm of her hands, watching me slice the fruit cakes and placing them in the smaller plates.

 

 

"Your kitten, Hee-roo was born here.  Oppa found out that the stray cats we've been taking care of, a pair of Siberians that wondered here during a storm, both mated and of course, the female got pregnant.  He had my omma bring one of the kittens to Seoul and we all thought that he would be giving it to his ex-girlfriend, Mi Yeon, turns out it was for your eighteenth birthday which I'm pretty sure you didn't enjoy given that you'd rather choose to be somewhere less... extravagant," she said as I finished working on the fruit cake, awed by what I just heard.  How much more has oppa told her? My interest, however got from moderate to high as Minji said Mi Yeon's name.

 

 

"Wow, I guess you do know a lot for your age," I commented, itching to ask more.

 

 

"Unnie, I do know a lot of things you'll be so surprised of.  Adults tend to think we young ones never listen to things around us," she says with a knowing smile.

 

 

"What has oppa been doing up at the mountains anyway? Does he have a companion with him?" I suddenly ask.

 

 

"Girl problems, you know about the recent break-up, right?" Minji groans at the mention of ‘Girl problems’ as I listen carefully, nodding my head.

 

 

"Oppa is up there by himself.  This all started when Haraboji told oppa this story about him and halmoni back in the day.  That time when halmoni and haraboji were separated for a short while because halmoni's parents didn't want haraboji for her.  Haraboji was so heartbroken he decided to let out all his frustrations by hiking up at the mountains.  He says that it helped him clear his mind and find the answers he has been looking for all along,"

 

 

"What happened?" I asked, wanting her to continue.

 

 

"Haraboji doesn't get in to detail about what happened to him up there, only that it was the hardest journey of his life.  When he made it back down, he realized that he could never love any other woman again but halmoni.  Thus, he fought for her and, well, the rest is history... that is also the end goal pabo Jiyong oppa wants to accomplish, by the way," Minji finished, shaking her head as I let out a light chuckle. 

 

 

If women go cry all their sorrows in some cold shower and get a haircut, men go out and take a hike to the mountains, typical.

 

 

"Halmoni is a very lucky woman," I say, as Minji nods her head in approval, her raven hair swaying with the abrupt movement.

 

 

To say, that I was deeply touched by Jingyo and Minji's grandparents' love story is already an understatement.   I am secretly a romantic at heart and how I dream of something as sweet as this, to be fought for by the man you really love, a love as strong and passionate like what the movies portray, but then in the end I know it's all going to be just what it is, a young heart's dream.

 

 

Reality , to be honest.

 

 

"Minji... do you know why your oppa and Mi Yeon unnie broke up?" I asked cautiously, not wanting to sound like a busybody but then the curiosity is killing me every day.  Somehow, I just have a feeling that she knows the reason.

 

 

However, this sly cousin of Jingyo's just gives me another one of those meaningful smiles, her eyes disappearing into thin crescents as she places all the plates on to a tray.

 

 

"Maybe... maybe not," she says in sounds like a teasing tone before heading back to the dining area with the tray full of fruit cakes, leaving me wondering and even more curious. 

 

 

God, all this mysteriousness will be the death of me.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

#

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Jingyo's halmoni had us rest for a while in some of the rooms.  It seems like Jingyo won't be back any time soon and from what Minji has told me, now I can't help but worry about his safety.  Bom and Dara had instantly collapsed on the makeshift bed, which meant these big soft cushions laid out on the floor, both dead tired from the long travel while I decided to go wash my face, ping my suitcase and grabbing all the things I need.  Walking out of the room, which is probably as big as my walk-in closet, I started walking cautiously towards the only bathroom of the house. 

 

 

This actually worries me a lot since I take such a long time in the bathroom and so does Dara and Bom, especially Bom, an hour isn't even enough for that girl! She needs the usual three hours or the record breaking 5 hours inside the bathroom.  With the presence of Nana Hye Mi who is busy exploring the land outside, Minji who went out to look for Hee-roo's parents, Halmoni who seems to be knitting at the living room, Haraboji who is still out at the sea port waiting for today's catch, Jingyo’s aunty, Minji’s omma, who is here to check the harvest this year, Butler Seo who is probably out doing bodyguard duties by securing the perimeter, and Jingyo who is still trekking somewhere up there, this would mean ten people sharing only one bathroom!

 

 

Ten people!

 

 

One bathroom!

 

 

Sharing my bathroom with someone already makes me go crazy and to share a bathroom with nine other people is going to be the death of me!

 

 

Let me cry for a while.

 

 

Sighing, I continue on with my extremely short trip to the bathroom but not before pausing to look at the picture frames hanging on the wall.  There was a picture of Jingyo's grandparents, a picture of the whole family, a picture of Minji, probably taken when she was about five or six years old with her appa, a cute little Jingyo holding a soccer ball and lastly… a picture of my appa and Jingyo's appa from way back! My appa looks just about my age as he stood next to Jingyo's appa with his hand around Uncle Kwon's neck, two handsome young men sporting goofy smiles in front of the camera.  Their shirts were dirty and they looked like they had rolled around the mud, which practically was the case since I could see a vast green field behind them.  The scenery actually looks quite familiar. 

 

 

Wait a minute... that looks like one of the fields that we passed by on our way here!  That means appa has been here!  I continue to stare at it closely, still amazed at the connection.

 

 

"He is a nice man, your father," a voice said from behind, I immediately turned my head to see Jingyo's halmoni smiling as she gently touches the frame of the photo.

 

 

"He suddenly came here one summer unannounced, that's why I told myself not to be surprised if one day you'd suddenly turn up here on a whim as well," she says, shaking her head at the irony of it all.

 

 

"What was appa doing here?" I asked.  It was rare for my appa to taking trips out of town now; everything was on schedule and planned.

 

 

"Probably the same reason why you're here, missing a friend," she says in a matter of fact tone.

 

 

"My son, Jiyong's appa felt very homesick that time and became ill, he was advised to return to his hometown and recuperate.  In a couple of days, your appa came, bringing in lot of gifts and stayed here for a week, living the life we common people live in even though he had countless complaints and questions" we both let out a light laugh.  My appa, who lived his life in grandeur, who has fear of furry animals, heights and dirt, paid no mind to all that just so he could visit a friend whom he already considers as a brother.

 

 

“Jiyong is going to be fine, Chaerin-ah.  We, Kwons, can be thrown anywhere around the globe and still survive.  He’ll be here before you know it and I’m very sure he’d be extremely happy to know you are here.  Besides, a photo of the both of you shall be a nice addition on this wall, now that is something that would make me extremely happy,” Jingyo’s halmoni says in a gentle motherly tone I am very familiar with as she pats my cheek lightly and heads back to the living room where I could see Hee-roo playing with the ball of knitting thread.

 

 

I couldn’t seem to shake off the feeling though, that like Minji, Jiyong’s halmoni also knows something about the reason of the break-up and it’s like they’ve all conspired to give the still very clueless Lee Chaerin, a.k.a. me, those meaningful smiles.

 

 

I was hoping to drown all these confusing thoughts by immediately heading inside the bathroom and give my face a much needed freshening up.  Initially, I was shocked at how small the bathroom was, there wasn’t even a bath tub!  It’s just the sink then the toilet and then next to it was the shower. 

 

 

People actually have bathrooms this small…

 

 

There wasn’t any option of hot or cold on the sink’s faucet so I had resolved to splashing cold water on my face.  I was almost done when I suddenly hear a shrill scream resounding all throughout the entire house.  If I wasn’t in the safety of these bathroom walls I would have surely gone deaf.

 

 

I hurriedly rushed out the bathroom, being familiar with the owner of that voice.

 

 

Dara.

 

 

I could never be wrong yet as I run across the short hallway towards our room a million questions race through my mind.  Could there be an intruder wanting to do harm to my friends?  Did something caught on fire?  An earthquake which I couldn’t feel?  Was the house falling apart?

 

 

Please don’t let them be in harm’s way.

 

 

In five seconds I was barging through the door, I could hear Minji’s footsteps behind me as halmoni’s worried voice echoes from the living room.  My eyes instantly spot both Dara and Bom cramped up in a corner of the room, seemingly terrified and clearly awake. 

 

 

However, what I expected as something at a level of national security happens to be a…. bug.  Seriously? I thought I was going to be facing some type of pandemonium and play heroine to rescue my beloved friends but then all this commotion is just about some bug— that is one a huge bug… a huge, creepy looking bug…

 

 

Oh my—

 

 

“Ah!! Jingyo!!!”

 

 

Everything happened out of pure instinct. I found myself screaming oppa’s name, which is basically what my first reaction to danger is.  Also, I may have unintentionally meant to use Minji as a shield because an eighteen year old screaming and hiding behind a very calm fifteen year old is just odd and definitely wrong, but then my body has already chosen such defense mechanism, I just wasn’t myself anymore.

 

 

I felt Bom jump towards me, also using Minji as shield while Dara has somehow gotten hold of her huge bottle of bug spray, she quickly sprays the bottle towards the bug but then it started crawling creepily that Dara shrieked for the third time, probably rivaling the fire truck’s alarm, while running towards us.   We probably had gone around in circles with poor Minji, still serving as our sole human shield, trying to assure us that there is nothing wrong.

 

 

“Dara! Kill it! Kill it!!”

 

 

“I’m trying, Bommie!! It won’t die!! O-Omma!!”

 

 

“Please die already, bug!!!”

 

 

“Newspaper!! We need newspaper!! All the ahjusshis back at home use that to kill the flies!!” I scream, flailing around frantically behind Minji’s back.

 

 

“Step on it, Chaerin-ah!!”

 

 

“I can’t Dara!! Jeremy gave me these sneakers as a present!  I won’t have some scary bug breathing their last breath and spilling their guts all over it!!”

 

 

“But— Ahh!! it’s crawling again!!”

 

 

“Ahhhhh!!”

 

 

“City kids,” I hear Minji tiredly sigh but then we were all running around crazily in panic to make sense of anything else.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

#

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The calm after the storm.

 

 

That’s what it felt as I sat at the Kwon family’s living area; the once small area filled with simple furniture has now become a post-trauma center.  I look at my other two companions, my best friends who seemed to have the same blank look as I.  Jingyo’s halmoni had already made us tea to calm our nerves while nana Hye Mi exterminates whatever living being that might still be hiding inside our room. 

 

 

The incident earlier ended with Minji stepping on the terrifying bug, silencing the place as we all stared dumbly at the squished remains.  It was then that I noticed the whole room looking like it has gone through a tornado, the mattress were Dara and Bom has collapsed on minutes before the craziness has flipped like a pretzel, all the other things we owned was tossed and scattered everywhere.

 

 

Right now, the only thing I feel is embarrassment.  I can’t even look at Jingyo’s halmoni straight in the eye for causing such a senseless commotion in her own house.  Not to mention, we could have damaged the room itself and even though money isn’t a problem I bet that if I’d place myself in her shoes I’d probably never have my son marry some girl who gets easily scared by—

 

 

Wait, what was I just thinking?  Did I say marry?  My mind must have gone haywire…  

 

 

Somehow, even though I may have tried to forget about the stupid idea I can’t help but feel like I have to prove something to Jingyo’s family, like I’m vying for a spot to be accepted here.   I guess from the moment I stepped in this house, I unintentionally or probably automatically let my mind fly and imagine myself being potential granddaughter in-law… I need to stop thinking of impossible things before it gets worse.  I don’t want to end up in the mental hospital. 

 

 

Just thinking about it scares me...

 

 

 

 

Patient: Lee Chaerin

Diagnosis: Delusional to the point of no return (similar to Bigbang & 2NE1 fans)

Medication: 3 cups of chocolate milk per day, more coloring activities, 24/7 Rilakkuma teddy bear as companion and regular visits from family and friends, especially Kwon Jiyong.

 

 

 

 

I shuddered unintentionally, shaking my head and snapping myself out of the disturbing image before finding myself face to face with Jingyo’s halmoni who then placed her hand on top of mine, a warm smile on her lips.  I could tell she was about to laugh if not for my pitiful expression.  Oh how I want to go find a well to fall in and haunt people with.  Thus, I resort to the one thing I know is only appropriate in this situation.

 

 

“We are really sorry, halmoni,” I say as I kneel down and do the most respectful bow in the whole wide world, Bom and Dara had their heads hanging down low while sincerely giving their apologies as well.

 

 

“Aigoo, get up child!  What is there to be sorry about?” halmoni says, trying to pull me up by the arm yet I kept on mumbling on how our ignorance got the best of us and all those stuff that I just spontaneously said in one breath.  She did manage to place my arms on her lap.

 

 

“Halmoni, I’m sorry about the commotion.  The neighbors must be mad because of the noise.  That bug was really scary, it took us by surprise and it made us scream really loud,” I went on in all remorse when I hear her laughter ringing around the house.  She laughed heartily that I could see her wiping tears at the side of her eyes that I fear she might get a sudden heart attack from all the laughing.

 

 

I only looked up at her cluelessly as she continued to laugh, shaking her head a couple of times before finally getting to catch her breath and looking down at me.

 

 

“You are really your father’s daughter,” she said, gently my hair.

 

 

“If it makes you any better, when your father came here he peed on his pants when he saw a small snake in the bathroom,” her words made me let out a laugh while Dara gasps from behind me.

 

 

“There are snakes here too?!” she whispers towards Bom who tries to stop her from fainting.

 

 

“Don’t worry, dear, the snakes here mostly eat crops and are not the poisonous kind.  They don’t bite humans just like that bug in your room earlier,” halmoni explains.

 

 

“Although from the looks that bug was giving me I’m thinking otherwise,” Bom blurts out before Dara’s hand clamps on while I quickly turn my head at her to give her a look.  It’s a good thing halmoni didn’t hear her clearly.

 

 

“We’ll keep that in mind and not panic next time, halmoni,” I say in a very remorseful tone as I look up at her.

 

 

“It’s really alright, child.  We understand if you and your friends aren’t feeling comfortable about things like that.  Don’t be ashamed of anything and treat this as your own home from now on, okay?” she assures me, patting my cheeks as I begin to smile at her words.

 

 

“Then it’s only right that we help with the household chores, halmoni.  We don’t want to be a burden here,” I say sincerely, prepared to do anything in the world.  I am determined to show them that I’m not just some ignorant city kid who came here demanding to be treated like a queen.  Those rumors the stupid paparazzi’s make about me are definitely not true.

 

 

“Well if you really insist then…”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

#

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

This is the best job in the world.

 

 

“Remember to pick the ones that fully red until the tip, just like this one,” one of Jingyo’s aunty, aunt Shi Yeon reminds us again, showing the deep red strawberry in her hands for all of us to see.

 

 

I take another gulp as I look at the long rows of heavenly goodness in front of me.  I feel like those delicious red fruits are calling out to me in this very magnetic level. 

 

 

Strawberry over here.  Strawberry over there.  Strawberry eh eh eh everywhere!!  Am I in heaven?

 

 

I look at my side to see Bom and Dara equally excited as I am, each of us with a container in hand ready to fill it up with strawberries. 

 

 

“Now, here’s how you pick them.  You hold on to the stem with your forefinger and thumb, breaking it gently like this,” aunty Shi Yeon says, perfectly demonstrating in front of us.  She seemed so happy to know about our unannounced arrival earlier and was more than willing to teach us about strawberry harvesting.

 

 

So this is where Jingyo gets those sweet strawberries from.

 

 

Not wasting precious time, we all went to work happily, crouching over at each of our corners and carefully picking the ripe strawberries.  I had sneakily eaten some countless times, well aunty Shi Yeon says it’s okay so... might as well grab the golden chance.  I didn’t even have to ask since the very first words she says upon seeing me is, ‘Eat as much as you like, I know you love strawberries so much’.

 

 

Even Jingyo’s aunty knows this?

 

 

To say that everything went well would be a big lie, even though I managed to gulp down my screams and just resort to running off back outside the green house once we saw a this ugly looking worm.  It may have been a caterpillar but I absolutely had no time to inspect, so did Dara and Bom who were even quicker than lightning, bolting out in seconds.

 

 

But then, despite all that, we got our first strawberry harvesting done and with high marks by aunty Shi Yeon too!  We just need to get over our fear of bugs and everything will be perfect.  I’ve never been so proud of myself. 

 

 

There is so much to see and learn here, we watched the ahjummas making colorful sweaters and necklaces.  They even graciously gave us the finished product, for free!   They would absolutely not take any money so I bought them snacks instead.

 

 

I am definitely in love with this place.  

 

 

Meanwhile, when we were busy trying not to eat all the strawberries, Haraboji has finally gotten back from the sea port.   It’s funny how I just looked at his pictures back in his youth a while ago that when he stepped in I could already tell it was him.  He seems to be a man of a few words as he greets us, that is until his eyes fall on me when halmoni points me out from the rest.  In seconds I get a big bear hug from him. 

 

 

“My strawberry granddaughter is finally here!” he says immediately as I get squeezed in the hug.  

 

 

You got to be kidding me!  Even haraboji??

 

 

Seeing this, Halmoni immediately taps his back and pulls him away, scolding him a bit.   Dara and Bom’s soft giggles were barely audible but that didn’t pass my ears.

 

 

“Aigoo, let her breathe, Chaerin-ah is staying here for two nights,” she says and I’m pretty certain that haraboji’s eyes sparkled at her words and soon enough he was telling me of places he wants me to see.

 

 

“You don’t look like your father at all which is why I didn’t recognize you immediately.  You must look like your mother but then I only saw her in person once,” he keeps telling me which was true, I do look like my mother.  I politely answer every question he asks.

 

 

When I did get a chance to be by myself, Bom nudges me once haraboji goes to prepare what he calls a ‘Welcome home feast’.

 

 

“Yah, tell me the truth, are you sure we are at your Jingyo’s place.  They look more like your extended family,” 

 

 

“More like her husband’s family,” Dara whispers as she passes us by, carrying the kimchi needed for tonight’s dinner.  I glare back at her but she innocently walks to the kitchen to join Minji, her mother and halmoni like she said nothing at all.

 

 

“She’s right! Chaerin-ah, you can practice being daughter in-law here,” Bom teases as I push her away playfully.

 

 

“Bommie! You know I don’t look at Jingyo that way anymore, I’ve accepted what we are now and that’s going to remain that way… forever,” I hissed back at her, hoping nobody hears all their nonsense.

 

 

Forever.   Forever.  Forever.  Forbloodyever… that’s seems like a long time.  

 

 

“Whatever you say, strawberry daughter in-law,” Bom says playfully before sauntering to the kitchen to join Dara.

 

 

I glanced at the happy photos on the wall by my right as some thought I couldn’t help but welcome passes through my mind.   What if… I really did become part of this family in that kind of way?   I guess my photos would be on this wall too, on the family portrait perhaps… or a whole frame of just me and Jingyo... being more than what we are now.

 

 

What if…

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

#

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I am worried.

 

 

Dinner was great and all but then it wasn’t perfect.   Jingyo hasn’t arrived yet.   The sun has long set and it’s already dark outside.   I could tell everyone was trying not to think of something terrible by talking of happy memories and getting to know each of us.    

 

 

Haraboji did have a feast made with all the fish and meat he grilled earlier laid out on the table.   I am not insensitive to know that they don’t usually eat this much before.  It’s not that they couldn’t afford such amount of food but then I know that every average family practically eats what is just right for them.   I feel like there is a very important occasion going on here.    

 

 

I was given large servings by haraboji himself saying all these were for me and that if I wanted more I should just voice it out.  Aunty Shi Yeon was here as well with Minji who bonded with us earlier when we were watching the ahjummas do craftwork.   She is no ordinary fifteen year old, I tell you.  Sometimes, she is just more mature than we are.   She balances us very well, much to my delight since I am not alone in reprimanding those two crazy Parks’.     

 

 

Minji still won’t tell me about the break-up though.   She says it’s a cousin’s word of honor that holds her tongue from blabbing anything about oppa.  

 

 

I wish I was this close with my cousins.

 

 

Anyway, I’ve been sitting out here by the porch on this really comfy two-seater swing waiting for Jingyo oppa to arrive.  Halmoni was sitting beside me earlier but then she had to sleep already since old people usually sleep early.   I even had to persuade her that she should take a rest and that I will welcome oppa home.   She smiled at that, another one of those meaningful smiles that still confuses me.  I believe she looked extremely worried before I said those words.   It’s like she had this three hundred and sixty degree flip of mood and happily walked inside, humming a happy tune.

 

 

Haraboji took her place though and that’s when I learned more about my appa’s stay here before.  I found out that he made a couple of visits after and even brought my omma here, introducing her to the whole Kwon family.   It was only after my father became president of the business that his visits became rare until it just stopped,   although he did call them to bring the good news of omma’s pregnancy and later on when she finally gave birth to me.   

 

 

Haraboji is such a funny man.  He would keep telling me jokes and funny stories about the people here, the love triangle between the neighbor’s cows, the hilarious fight over the fishes at the sea port earlier and even when Jingyo was still in diapers. 

 

 

Baby Jingyo must have been cute!   Yes sir, he’s one of a kind~

 

 

The clock ticks further as haraboji calls for his other son, another one of Jingyo’s uncles who lives a few houses away from here.   It’s really amazing how their families are close by, my relatives live in different countries and only come back to Seoul during the holidays.  Jingyo’s uncle comes by in a few minutes and decides to go call the mountain rangers about oppa.

 

 

Haraboji could only sigh tiredly as I persuade him to sleep already.  He gives in just like halmoni and reminds me not to stay out for too long.  Dara and Bom had already taken turns, telling me that Jingyo will be back before I know it and that the night air was getting chilly.  

 

 

In the end, it was only me and butler Seo who, no matter how much I order to take a rest inside was stiff as a rock, doing body guard duties.  I then resigned to reading messages from my worried parents.  My appa and omma had also called so many times today that my phone instantly lost battery by their fifth call. 

 

 

The worry I had seems to be increasing by the hour.  It’s almost midnight and he is still not here.  I know that the mountain rangers are now heading out to the mountains to look for him.   For all we know, he could be injured out there, cold, hungry and with desperate need of medical attention.

 

 

Why did he even go up to the mountains?  Doesn’t he see the answer right in front of him?   If he loves Mi Yeon then he should do anything to get her back!   I shake my head in frustration, aware that butler Seo may be thinking weirdly of me.   Then maybe I wouldn’t be worried sick right now…

 

 

 

 

 

Chaerin’s Note

 

Oppa, I’m worried about you right now.  I don’t know what else to do now.  It’s hard waiting like this.  I fear something bad may have happened to you.  I know you will never read this but… I just need an outlet for all this anxiety.   I wish we could read minds so I would know exactly where you are and if you are safe. 

 

Please come home… I’ll be waiting. 

 

-Chae-roo

 

 

 

 

 

I felt like my mind is slipping in between sleep and consciousness.  The cold air is making it hard for me to stay awake.  It’s almost midnight and he is still not back.  If he still doesn’t return I think I might just cry.  This stupid separation anxiety is killing me.  

 

 

Great… the tears are coming now…

 

 

I just—

 

 

Creak.

 

 

The unlocked gates slowly open as I suddenly straighten up from my seat and getting up on my feet, all of which woke up butler Seo who was sitting nearby, he drunk with the uncles earlier so that’s why he looked red in the face right now.

 

 

I stood at the front of the porch, trying to make-out from the dark the silhouette of the incoming person.  The only light source I have right now is the one right next to the door and it isn’t even that bright.

 

 

But then I didn’t have to figure out who the person was as I suddenly dropped the shawl aunty Shi Yeon gave me and just quickly leaped down the small stairs, crashing myself in to the strong arms of the person I had been desperately waiting for.

 

 

“Chae-roo?”

 

 

Oppa’s voice sounds so tired and hoarse like he has been shouting for hours.  He must have lost so much weight too.  I would know, I’ve hugged him lots of times, I can tell the difference.    He also smells like leaves and soil and whatever it is he may have come in contact with up there but then that doesn’t matter anymore.

 

 

He is finally home.

 

 

“Why did you have to go up there by yourself?   Why go up there at all?  Do you know how much we are worried about you?!  We had mountain rangers looking for you!  I was about to call the international ranger rescuers!” I scold him as soon as I break the hug, cupping his cheeks to examine his face yet he only blinks and looks at me. 

 

 

His lips were pale, his skin wasn’t good at all and the dark circles under his eyes are clearly visible.  I had to gasp at a cut on his right temple, next to his eye.  It wasn’t serious but still it was rare to see him with wounds.   He probably has scratches around his arms and hands too.

 

 

“Oppa, what happened to this?!  Who did this—no, what did this to you??  Are you alright?? Have you eaten yet?”  I ranted on, my eyes not leaving that cut on his face.

 

 

However, he only stares at me.  He seemed to be studying every inch my face to the point that I was already getting conscious.  I am definitely sure I washed my face and brushed my teeth so there can’t be any dirt on it.

 

 

“Oppa?  W-What’s wrong?” I ask uncertainly, my hands slowly slipping off his face but he stops that from happening, holding my hands against his cheeks.

 

 

Oh god… why am I feeling something fuzzy inside me?  Go away butterflies in my stomach… shoo!

 

 

A smile suddenly tugs on his lips, slowly widening in to that grin which makes every girl in campus squeal and faint.   His body shakes and the next thing I hear are his infectious chuckles.   He seems…

 

 

“I bumped my head,” he says rather happily, pointing over at his cut as my eyes widen.

 

 

“You bumped your head?!”   I repeat, just to be certain.   He is still sporting that smile, chuckling every now and then that I am afraid he needs a CT scan for the brain.

 

 

“I’m okay, extremely okay, perfect!” he went on, like he just realized something then there goes that happy laughter.  He looked like a man who was looking so hard to find his precious glasses only to find out that they were just hanging around his neck.

 

 

Is he drunk?  Doesn’t seem like there is a bar up at the mountains though...

 

 

“Oppa—!“ I began but then my impending suggestion that we go see the doctor was cut off by his body crushing hug.  At one point I thought I would die, well, at least I’d die happy.

 

 

“I’m just happy you’re here, Chaerin,” he whispers and I can’t help but smile.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Butler’s Note

I finally got my answer.  It was right in front of me all along.

 

-Jingyo

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

A.N.:

 

Question: Have you any idea what could be more depressing than your favorite fanfic not updating?  

 

Answer: Chugging down cold sodas like crazy on a cold night and waking up with a runny nose, an extremely annoying headache and a very itchy throat.  So you lay on bed all day on a Sunday till a few couple of days, dying, wasting tissue, coughing up all that eww, drinking all those nasty tasting stuff to get rid of all that, and being separated from your laptop by force. 

 

Now beat that.

 

SICK >>>> FABULOUSLY FINE

 

So, I'm back... to wreck havoc.

 

THANK YOU TO THOSE WHO READ, COMMENTED, SUBSCRIBED, UPVOTED,  CRIED,  RANTED, DEMANDED and BUGGED ME TO DEATH.

 

 I honestly feel the love.

 

Merry Christmas to 216 pretty people!  ♥ ☆ ♥