I closed the apartment door slowly and stepped out to the unfamiliar place; I just needed some fresh air to clear my mind and I just needed to stay away from the place he’s in at the moment; I was frustrated and stressed out

 I inhaled the cold air; that refreshed my lungs; I kept walking blankly thinking about everything that has happened the past few months; the sun didn’t rise yet and the cold fog was blocking everything from sight; I approached a low wall where you can sit and observe the beach; I bent down beside the end of it and now if I took one step; My feet could touch the cold beach sands; the beach was far enough thought so I just bent down beside the low wall; spacing out while inhaling the freezing air; it was so quiet; I can only hear the soft sounds of the waves; he came crossing again though my thoughts and my heart started aching me again

"I handled a lot from the day you left Umma, Appa” I said softly while fixing my eyes on the not so clear beach because of the cold fog;

 “Sometimes … I just hate you for leaving me in this tough world” I said again and shivered from the cold wind that blew suddenly

“I wonder what my uncle is doing now by all the money you made … I just hope he'll forget about me … because ………. “ I said softly and my voice cracked as tears started forming quickly in y eyes not giving me a chance to stop them

"Because …. I feel that I'm going to be exposed anytime soon!" I said softly and tears managed to escape my eyes quietly

" Umma … am so afraid; losing them is not … easy” I said sobbing while looking up at the sky

"It's almost a year Umma, Appa; I really *sobs* … I missed you …" I said and clenched my fist bringing it to my mouth as I tried to suffocate my cries but couldn’t stop my loud sobs as I cried my heart out; I was really tired and I was so scared …

Kris POV

I opened my eyes at 5:30 am; I was having a headache and regretted drinking so much last night; I stood up heading to the kitchen when I saw a messy sheets on the floor, bowl full of water and a half cooked porridge?

"Someone is sick?" I said heading to ___'s room; I knocked softly but no response; I opened the door slowly peeking inside and the bed looked like no one slept on it last night

 "Where is she?" I thought heading to the living room again; No signal; Bathroom? Empty.

“Lay?" I said opening his door slowly; I saw him sitting on the floor; bed edge supporting his back and the bed sheets were thrown at the room side; I looked around and looked back at him

"Are you okay? You look pale?" I said approaching him

"A bit sick" he said shortly in a low voice

“Where? What’s hurting you?” I said and touched his forehead worriedly

“Am fine Kris, no need to worry” he said and I examined his face that didn’t look like he’s fine at all

"Where’s ____?” I asked him and his head jerked up; he looked at me

"Where is she? She's not here?" he said shocked; I looked at him weirdly

"I looked for her … But No –" he suddenly stood up running to the exit; he ran out and I stood there clueless; when it hit me; I looked at the exit door and sighed

"You hurt her again?"

Lay POV

I was shocked when Kris told me she wasn't around; I was afraid she might go somewhere and get lost; I know she's clumsy; she might do something foolish too

“She’s not even familiar with this place why the hell would she go out alone” I said as I was running and looking around trying find her but she was nowhere to be seen; I was getting more and more worried now; I stopped and looked around me; the sun didn’t rise yet as it was starting to rise but it was still not lightened enough; the air was so cold and foggy and it made it harder for me to spot her; I was panting hard and I kept looking around me

"___  ah!!!! " I shouted her name hoping she would hear me but all I could only here my own voice echoing all over the place; I started running again looking around the place and I was about to call her name again when I saw that small figure that was so familiar to me

She was bent down not fully sitting on the ground by the low wall that was beside the beach; her side was supported by the wall and her hand was clenched into a fist while covering ; her sobbing were so loud; she was crying hard and her sobbing were echoing around the place; she tried to suffocate her cries by her hand 

I stood at my place looking at her sobbing hard; I was panting heavily but she was crying so hard to even hear it or notice my presence; I clenched my fist as my heart was aching at her sight; I approached her; angrily; I held her hand that was covering by the wrist and pulled her to stand up

Her eyes widened when she saw me; she stopped crying and looked at me in the eyes; I looked at her back while breathing the cold air heavily preventing myself from spilling the tears that were chocking me at the moment; her teary eyes kept looking at mine while sobbing; she looked scared and sad …

"Why are you crying?” I said firmly with an angry tone while looking at her still panting heavily and she looked at me; tears still coming out silently; I was still holding her wrist tight

"You obviously know I'm in love with you yet you kissed Jonghyun!" My voice cracked as tears started to form in my eyes threatening to fall any moment now; I looked at her furiously and she kept on sobbing while her eyes widened while breathing the cold air heavily too

"THE WEATHER IS SO COLD SO WHY ARE YOU CRYING IN THE MIDDLE OF THE STREETS?? WHY?!" I said angrily scolding her and shook her by her wrist while still holding it firmly

"Is it because of me? That's why you are being like this?" I said questioning her but she just avoided my looks while tears started coming out of her eyes again silently

"Say it!!!" I said still holding her hand tight; I was panting heavily; preventing tears that already formed to fall; it was really cold; I looked at her waiting for an answer

 "Y-You're hurting me … Let go" she said trying to free her wrist from my grip and I let go of her hand angrily

_____POV

‘What? Did he just confess to me? I can't say I love him back! I can't! I don't want to hurt him! I'm lying … to them all, they’ll be so hurt; I’ll just disappear quietly after telling them the truth; but I can’t be that selfish and hurt him .. Can I?’ I thought panting heavily as tears dropping and sobbing while biting my lower lip and looking at him in the eyes

"AREN’T YOU GOING TO STOP CRYING” He shouted and glared at me with his teary eyes

 “Do you know how ugly you look if your face is ugly and you are crying on top of that?” he said shouting at me; I sobbed and looked at him

‘I have to let go; I should tell him that I like someone else; I love you so much Lay that I don't want to hurt you’ I thought with tears filling my tears

"I … I like someone else … " I said in between my sobs while trying to avoid his stares not to let him see the love in my eyes; my heart was hurting so much; the one I love so much and care for; I’m losing him and am the one who’s letting go now …

Lay POV

"I … I like someone else …" she said and I felt my chest tightening; I looked at her as she was avoiding my eyes now

"Jonghyun?" I said as a tear slide down my cheek; she didn't say anything and I can only her soft sobs

"You like him don't you!" I snapped at her and she jerked her head up looking coldly at me with teary eyes

"Yeah! I like him! I like … Jonghyun Oppa" she said and her voice cracked while saying his name and I was taken aback by the sudden coldness in her attitude

“It has nothing to do with you! So don't interfere between us" she said and her words hit me so hard like sharp knives that stabbed my heart; a smirk formed on my lips; I looked at her and walked passed her; our shoulders brushed lightly

____POV

I could see how hurt he was but suddenly a smirk formed on his lips and then he left; I turned slowly and looked back; he just continued walking till he disappeared from my sight; I clenched where my heart was aching; I stood there; tears dropping again; I looked up to the sky

"I chose the right choice Umma … right? I shouldn't hurt him more; I'm leaving them anyways" I said sobbing

Lay POV

"She likes him; did she really have to confirm it in that hurtful way; it’s not like I don't know already about her liking him!" I said walking away furiously; I stopped walking when I was far enough from her; I took a heavy breathe

 "She really let go of me completely … I missed my chance long time ago didn't I?” I thought and sat at a bench and looked up

 "I already knew she liked him, but why it's hurting so much?!" I clenched where my heart was aching so much

____ POV

The sun started rising; I started heading back to the apartment; we are leaving to Seoul today; soon enough I was standing in front of the door where all EXO are behind now …

"I should look normal; I don't want them to suspect that anything happen; I don’t want them to worry anymore" I said forming a fake smile on my lips; I opened the door

"I'm back …." I shouted and Kris oppa was the first to approach me

"Where did you go?" he said smiling softly

"Just went out for a walk; I needed some fresh air " I said faking a smile and he just nodded

"I’ll prepare the breakfast enough ordering food" I said walking away; he chuckled and asked me

"Were you with … Lay?" he said and I turned back nervously

"A-Ani; I was alone" I said and he nodded; I walked faster to the kitchen so he wouldn't ask me anything else

Kris POV

I noticed how she was acting weirdly when she got back I asked her about Lay and she said she was a lone; I nodded although I was 100% sure they met and something happened between them; I took my phone and dialed Lay’s number and the moment he picked up I could feel from his voice that something happened

"Mmm, hyung … " he answered softly

‘He said hyung? He never calls me hyung? It's only when he’s feeling so down and need me as a hyung he would do so’ I thought growing worried about him now

"Where are you?" I said going far from the kitchen

"Beside the pool" he said shortly

"She's at the apartment now" I told him and I could hear him sighing

"You met her?" I said and he didn't say anything

"Come back Lay hmm? We need to have breakfast and pack up to head back" I said as I knew he didn’t want to talk about anything now

"I will hyung …" he said and I hung up

Lay POV

"I'm back …" I said softly when I entered the place and they looked at me

"Where did you go hyung, Omo~ You look pale!!!! Are you sick? Kris hyung! " Tao said looking at me panicking and ran to the room to call Kris; I looked at ___ who was preparing breakfast and Luhan who was helping her; he turned when he heard Tao and rushed to me

“Are you okay? Where are you hurting? I’ll call Manager hyung; we’ll go see a doctor before leaving” he said over worried and all the guys surrounded me with worried expression

“He look so pale hyung …” we turned as we heard Tao who’s coming along with Kris who approached me and felt my forehead and looked at me; I think he understands why am so pale; he knows exactly what’s paining me …

"I'm fine guys … I just need some rest" I said assuring them and then looked at Kris who told them to let me rest for awhile; I closed the door and went directly to the bed and sat there …

"I can't bear staying at the same place with her … it hurts" I thought looking at the door blankly

"Breakfast is READY~" I Heard her voice announcing; I sighed when I heard her voice and laid down and covered myself

____ POV

I heard him announcing that he's back; I wanted to run to where he was and make sure he's okay; I wanted to feel his forehead; I wanted to make sure he's fine now; but I didn't even turn back

I heard Tao panicked voice about Lay being so pale; suddenly Luhan Oppa who was helping me dropped whatever was in his hand and rushed to his side; being over worried about him

‘Why are they panicking? It’s just a fever …’ I thought as I tried to act normal; I can feel how scared they were and worried about him and I was actually a bit confused about them being over like I mean over worried about him looking pale; Kris managed the situation and asked him to rest; I heard the room door closing softly and I turned back slowly and looked at it and then looked at the guys

“Kris … let’s take him to the hospital” Suho said still worried and Kris sighed and looked at the room Lay was in right now

"Is it ready yet?" Chanyeol voice brought me to reality with a little smile

"Ah .. yeah”  I said smiling back to him; I arranged the table and shouted

 "Breakfast is READY~~~~~~" I wanted Lay would hear; they all came and sat down

“Hyung .. Let Lay hyung eat something so we can give him some medicine” Chen said; Kris then looked at me and I shifted nervously while digging in my food

"____ go call him …" He said and I was shocked

“It’s okay hyung I’ll go call hi—“ Sehun said but was cut off by Kris glare

"W-Why should I call him? If he wants to eat he should come by himself" I said looking at him; surprisingly he looked at me unsatisfied

"When did you start answering Oppa back?" he said and I looked down

"I'm sorry Oppa …. " I said and got up to call Lay

‘Why is he insisting on letting me interact with him? He knows something doesn’t he?’I thought heading to where Lay is

" Hyung! Why are you scaring her?!" Baekhyun said looking at Kris who glared at him too; I Knocked softly and opened the door slowly peeking inside

Lay POV

I heard soft knocking and I knew it was her; I didn't want to look at her; I didn't want talk or hurt her, so I pretended to be sleeping; I heard the door opening and I heard her soft steps

"You sleeping?" she said softly and slowly felt my forehead with her soft, tiny hand; I was really surprised; my heart started beating really fast that I was afraid she would hear it

"Still a bit warm ..” she said softly

 “I'll go bring you some medicine" she said leaving the room and left the door opened; I opened my eyes and looked at her back while she was leaving the room

 ‘Why do you care so much? This sickness pain is nothing compared to the pain you are giving me now ….’ I thought closing my eyes again

"He’s warming up again?" I heard Kris voice

"Yeah Oppa … I'm making him some porridge and here is the medicine" I heard her soft, caring voice

"Go bring him some porridge then so we can feed him the medicine" Kris said

"Yeah~" I heard her steps disappearing from the room

"Lay … I know you are awake" Kris said and I opened my eyes slowly

"Something happened right?" he asked me and I sat up on the bed

"No …" I said shortly informing him that I don't want to talk about it now

"Okay then as you like; we are leaving in an hour …" I nodded and he left but before he closed the door , ___ showed up with the tray of food; she approached me slowly avoiding my eyes; she placed the food on the table beside me and was about to leave when I held her wrist stopping her

She turned and looked at me in the eyes; I could see the love in there; I could see pain; I could see fear but why is she trying to push me away?

 I looked into her eyes lovingly but it was mixed with pain; we looked at each other’s eyes for awhile now; her eyes slowly shifted to our locked hands and I let go of it quickly

"E-eat some … and don't forget to take the medicine " she said closing the door behind her

____ POV

My heart was beating so fast so I headed out of the room quickly; I headed to my room directly closing the door and resting my back against it; sighing heavily

"Will I be able to stay at the same place with him around?" I said taking my bag and packed everything back; wearing simple skinny jeans with a white bluish T-shirt and prepared for leaving

"You guys ready to leave?" Manager said and everyone got their stuff and headed out side to the mini-van

“I’ll go get Lay’s hyung stuff” Sehun said and ran back to the apartment while Lay was walking in between Luhan and Kris with a mask on his mouth and nose; I looked at them and then ran after Sehun to the apartment

“Sehun-ah …” I said entering where Sehun was taking Lay’s stuff

“Yeah Noona?” he looked at me

“Can I ask you something?” I said unsure whether I should ask or not

“What’s wrong Noona?” he said again and gave me his full attention

“Why are you guys … over worried about Lay being sick?” I said carefully as I looked at him; his expression softened and he looked out of the window that was showing the van and the guys arranging their bags in along with the manager; I can see his eyes were fixed where Lay was standing with Luhan now

“Our hyung … he can’t get hurt” he said softly still looking at Lay through the window and I tried my best to get what he means

“Lay hyung-ie … has blood disorder disease …” he said and my heart sank 

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