She knows

She knows about me and her now

Me and Min….

I should’ve told her sooner, but I was afraid of what she’ll say

Afraid of her approving…

It’s weird… I didn’t tell her because I knew she would be happy for me…it’s gets weirder when I tell you that I wanted her to call me up and ask why? For her to tell me she didn’t want me dating…to tell me no she doesn’t love Dujun she loves me….

Yeah like that would happen….besides…

I’m happy with the relationship I’m in now, I should stay that way and forget about my first love….

I have a new love now, someone who loves me back

July….

Yoseob’s POV

The sunlight beamed through my window… it was the start of another hot long summer day…

Another day in which I didn’t know what I was going to do. I couldn’t spend time with Min because today she was busy…

She’s always busy now that I think about it. Her farther owns a flower shop so he always has her working behind the desk. I never knew a place to be so busy…especially for flowers…

(Flowers)

I closed my eyes at the old thought arising in my memory. Her birthday….the day I was beaten up by Junhyung.

The night she cried for me, the night I made her a promise that I’ll grow her more flowers. But that’s a promise I didn’t keep, the first one that I’ve broken.

But I doubt she’ll notice anyway.

I sighed to myself opening my eyes again. I turned over on my back and stared at the ceiling. I wonder what she’s doing today. I feel too awkward to call…ever since Min told me on the last day of school that Jae told her to take good care of me I find it more difficult to call her now. I didn’t tell her about me dating someone in the beginning and I felt like a bad friend, especially when we shared so many things with each other.

Then again…when she and Dujun started to date she didn’t tell me right away either.

I let another sigh escape my lips…and smiled faintly

Are we even still friends… how can we not speak to each other like this?

“Maybe we need…just a little more time

Time that can heal what’s been on your mind

You can find what we lost before it all slips away…”

Closing my eyes again I began humming the melody to the words I was just singing. Eric Benet’s “Cracks of my broken heart” was a song I felt connected to lately….

“Yoseob ah~” I heard my mother’s voice in the door way. “Ne” I answered sitting up on my elbows. “I was thinking…I haven’t seen Jae lately” she started to say. My eyes dropped from hers. “Has she been doing well?” she asked. “Ne” I nodded with a smile. (Lie)

Yet another lie I told to my mother….I didn’t know how Jae was doing.

“That’s good to hear, you should tell her to drop by and visit me sometime” she smiled before leaving back down the hall. “Ne” I said lying back down.

Umma asks about Jae more than Min…which always makes me think about her, I don’t think my mother cares about Min too much anyway...

“So just hold on and it won’t take long

I hope that you can love me

When the pain is gone

Don’t want us to fall through the cracks…

of my broken heart…”

I rubbed my fingers through my hair sighing for the third time. Why won’t the feelings go away?

I turned my head to look at the clock. It read11:30am (I wonder if Junho’s awake…?)

Jae’s POV

I looked at the calendar on my wall. July 4^th….

That’s a holiday back in the States. I knew my family was celebrating there. Though it wasn’t a holiday in Korea, today was still a day to be celebrated. I picked up my cell and looked at the time (11:30am…he should be up by now)

I dialed a number and pressed call. I waited for an answer as I listen to Seo Taiji’s “Nan Arayo” play.

Finally the voice I wanted to hear answered the phone groggily. [“Yoboseyo”] “♪Saengil chukahamnida, Saengil chukahamnida saranghaeun Dujun shii Saengil chukahamnida! ♪” I sung. I heard Dujun laugh a little. “Jagi, kamsamnida” he said, even though I couldn’t see I knew he was smiling. “Babe, happy birthday” I said in English. “Thank you, thank you” he said using English as well.

I lay down on my bed. “Yah were you sleeping? You should get up it’s almost noon” I said. [“Yes ma’am”] he said with a yawn. [“What’d you get me?”] Dujun asked. “A song” I smiled. [“Oh so you singing was my gift?”] He said. “Ne”. Dujun scoffed. [“Aish it could’ve been better”] he said. “Yah!” I pouted to myself. Dujun laughed. [“Just kidding, I loved it, a gift isn’t important”] he said. “Yeah…you should get dressed I’ll be over soon” I said. [“Arasso”] he replied. I hung up the phone.

I did get him something…it was hard for me to figure out what he would like and I’m still not sure if he’ll like it what I got him. I sighed looking at the box that lay next to me.

Yoseob’s POV

“Daebak!!” I shouted as I jumped up. “Aish chincha!?” Junho ruffled his hands through his hair in frustration. I laughed and kneeled down patting him on his shoulder. “Better luck next time” I smiled. He raised his hand as if he was going to hit me and I moved away quickly. “Aish I never understand how you always win” he mumbled. “I’m the best” I said sitting back down next to him. We had been playing video games for a while now. Zsuzsi was in the kitchen making rice cakes with Camila & J noona. “Again?” I asked with a raise of my brow. Junho frowned and sighed. “Let’s take a break” he said turning off the gaming system. “Yah Camila! Wrong ingredient!” Zsuzsi and J shouted around the same time. We could hear them clearly. “Mianhae!” Camila apologized in panic. Junho and I laughed. “So where’s your girlfriend today?” he asked. “She didn’t answer her phone” I said with a sigh. “She’s probably working at her family’s shop now” I said. “Oh I see” Junho nodded. “Unnie where’s Jae and the other girls today, are they busy?” we heard Camila ask. I turned my attention to the direction of the kitchen when I heard Jae’s name. I wanted to know what she was doing today too…

“Ah let’s see May will visit later, Jae’s probably spending time with Dujun, it’s his birthday today y’know” J noona started to say.

Of course she would be with Dujun….

I felt a pair of eyes on me as I sat there listening to the girls conversation. I turned to Junho who just stard at me. “Mworago?” I asked.  Junho shook his head and smiled a little. “You miss her?” he asked. “Miss who?”I asked. “Jae” he said. My eyes widened a little bit, why was he asking me that? “What do you mean?” I turned away a little. “Yah, don’t act…I know you like her…I’ve always known dude.” He said lowering his voice. I stared at him speechless how did he know? “I use to” I said, I wasn’t going to argue with him about it…

Jae’s POV

I held hands with Dujun as we walked back to his house. We had just come from norebang, my voice was tired from singing so much. It was around 9:00pm now. We spent the whole day together first the movies, bowling, & of course norebang was last. I wanted to pay for everything because it was his birthday…but Dujun being the guy that he is wouldn’t let me, leaving me to feel bad a little. It was his day, I should’ve payed. We finally stopped at his front door; he unlocked it still holding my hand. “You coming in?” he asked. “I shouldn’t its late and your parents-”

“Aren’t here” he said cutting me off and pulling me inside. He shut the door behind us. I looked around and it was completely silent. “Where did your parents go?” I asked. “There probably still at work, they’ll be home later” he said. I stared at him wondering if they did some sort of celebration for him today. Dujun smiled at me. “If you’re wondering if they had a chance to tell me happy birthday, yes they did, knowing my mom when she comes home she have a cake and we’ll celebrate then” he said. “Oh okay” I smiled. He grabbed my hand again leading me upstairs. “Come on” he said.

We entered his room and he the lights. I sat on his bed and he sat next to me. “Oh! I almost forgot” I said grabbing the small box from my tote bag. I handed it to him. “Ah what’s this” he said taking it from me analyzing it. “Open it and see” I said shyly. He opened it quickly and pulled out the silver watch. “Wow!” he exclaimed. ‘Kamsamnida” he said kissing my cheek first then my lips. I watched him put it on. “I was worried you weren’t going to like it” I said with a sigh of relief. “I love it” Dujun said pulling me closer to him, “But I love you more” he said pulling me back to lay with him. He placed his lips to mine again, but this time the kiss was deeper…

His hands roamed down to my thighs and his lips moved to my neck…

“Happy Birthday…” I whispered. Dujun rolled over onto me. “Thank you” he said has he continued marking my neck.

If we didn’t stop…it was going to lead to something more...

Suddenly we heard the door downstairs shut. “Dujun ah” we heard his mother’s voice. Dujun got off me and I sat up quickly, pulling out my cell phone trying to act natural. Dujun sat on the floor and grabbed his soccer ball tossing it and catching it as we heard his mom’s footsteps approaching. “Oh Jae annyong” she smiled as she stood in the door way. “Annyonghaseyo Mrs. Yoon” I smiled.

His mother still made me nervous…she was a nice woman but I still couldn’t help but feel that way with her. “Uh I was just getting ready to leave” I said standing up. “Oh I just bought a cake for Dujun don’t you want any?” she asked, “No ma’am thanks for asking” I said. Dujun looked at me and stood up. “Alright dear” she said leaving.

Once she did Dujun pulled me close to him. “Why are you leaving?” he asked. “I don’t want Lee umma to worry, plus you were starting to have a little too much fun” I said pushing him a little. “You weren’t complaining” he smiled. I turned away from him “Anhyong” I said. “Yahh” he whined as he followed me downstairs and to the front door. I slipped on my shoes. “Bye” I said pecking his lips. He sighed and told me good bye too.

As I walked home I thought about how close Dujun and I were to going to the next level…what happened only moments ago wasn’t as bad as what happened a week ago. I sighed to myself….I loved him yes, but I wasn’t sure when that time should come…

My conscious would always yell at me telling me I shouldn’t anyway…

Why?

As I was approaching Manchan’s corner I heard familiar giggling. Slowing my steps I tried to figure out who the voice belonged too.

“Jagiya” the voice said and immediately the person came to my mind. (Min?)

I peeked around the corner… (Is she with Yoseob?) I wasn’t sure I wanted to see the two…together anyway…

But when I saw her…she was kissing a boy…and boy that wasn’t Yang Yoseob at all…

To be continued……