Chapter 48: Missing You

“Tiffany,” A push.

“Tiffany, get up.” Another push with slightly more force.

“Oh my god, Tiffany, get up.” Two shoves.

I groan, digging my head further into the pillow.

“Stephanie Hwang Miyoung, if you don’t get up right now I will not hesitate to get Henry to get me a bucket of icy water to pour over you.”

“Jesus, shut up…” I mumble, turning my head the other way.

“Tiffany!”

“Okay, okay, I’m up, I’m up.” I slur, rolling over onto my back, remembering that I was still very much underneath the covers. I open, squint, my eyes.

Michelle towers over me, hands on her hips, looking rather annoyed. I hold the bed sheets up against my chest as I sit up.

I yawn and scratch the back of my head blearily. “What is it with you and rudely waking me up?”

She rolls her eyes. “It’s like one in the afternoon. Get up and put some clothes on. I’ll be waiting downstairs for you.”

I sigh as I watch her leave. I then look around the room, and the discarded clothes scattered across the floor from last night. The room a mess, clothes everywhere, me being , it all points to one thing, Michelle must have worked it out, and the thought suddenly makes me feel a little embarrassed.

I stand, taking the blankets with me and wrapping them around my body before heading off into the bathroom to shower. After having showered, I dry my hair and brush it into something somewhat presentable, add a light layer of make-up, and I find myself standing in the closet, in front of the several racks of clothes.

I scan through them, picking out a pair of denim shorts. I squint at my collection of shirts, and then one of Taeyeon’s blouses catches my eye – a white one, with long sleeves that she often wears when going to the office.

I slip into it, and roll up the sleeves. The faint undertones of her scent are interlaced into the material, and based mostly on that fact, I decide to wear it.

Yes, it’s only been a couple of hours since she left, but no matter how long its been, I still miss her like she’s already been gone a year.

I descend down the stairs and see Michelle sitting on the couch, scrolling through her phone. I stretch my hands above my head, glancing around the room, which – much like upstairs – is a mess. I walk around and into the kitchen.

“Sorry about the mess.” I say, getting out a glass and filling it with water. “Do you want a drink or anything?”

“Don’t you have maids for that?” She asks, still absorbed into whatever is on the screen of her phone.

I make my way over before plopping myself down on the couch beside her. “We don’t really call the maids that often anymore. Taeyeon prefers just to do stuff for herself, and I’ve kind of grown used to it as well.”

“Oh,” Is all she says for a moment, then she shrugs. “I mean, it seems like a bit of a waste to me. Maids are here to serve us, we might as well use them.”

“Yeah, I suppose.” I say, twisting my wrist slightly, letting the water lap up against the sides of the glass, and the way Michelle talks reminds me of how I used to be, and how much Taeyeon has changed me. Taeyeon…

“Is that Taeyeon’s shirt you’re wearing?”

I look up, and Michelle’s eyes are gazing at my outfit with slight interest.

“Uhm, yeah. I saw it in the closet and thought it went well with the rest of my outfit.” My unoccupied hand moves up and clasps around my locket, missing Taeyeon a little more each passing second.

“You already miss her to the point that you’re wearing her clothes?” She asks, raising her brows at me.

I look away from her and shrug a little. “I guess.”

“It’s quite amazing.” She says, putting her elbow up on the backrest of the couch, leaning her head on her fist, lips smiling and eyes shining.

“What is?”

“You and Taeyeon.” She answers simply, her gaze unwavering. “Your relationship, it never fails to amaze me. I never thought that my little sister would fall in love so deeply, let alone with another woman.”

I frown and meet her eyes. “What does gender have to do with anything?”

“Oh, I just mean that I thought you’d marry a guy.”

“Honestly,” I inspect my nails. “Before I met Taeyeon, so did I.”

“Was it…confusing?” She asks, and it seems as though she’s wanted to ask me about this for a while.

I breathe through my nose, I’ve never had this conversation with anyone and I never really expected to anytime soon.

“Well…” I start, “Yeah, I suppose it was.”

“How did you deal with it?”

“Why are you so interested?” I say in return. “You never cared before.”

“I did care before, I just never asked. I’ve wondered for a while, and I’m just curious.” She replies, and the flecks in her eyes tell me that she genuinely is interested.

I sigh and look down into my lap, thinking of how to put it into words. “I think…I denied it for a while. In my head there was no way that I could be a lesbian, I’d been straight my whole life. So, suddenly falling in love with a girl was, well…shocking.” I look back at her to find that she’s listening quite intently. I continue, “I couldn’t deny the things that I felt for Taeyeon. After some time, I realized that I didn’t fall in love with her gender. I fell in love with her. I’d love Taeyeon just as much if she were a guy. And now…well, it’s stopped me from seeing people just based on their gender, their race or…whatever. People are just…people.”

Michelle smiles, and I swallow down and chuckle a little. It’s so strange to open up to her, I feel rather bare.

She reaches over and ruffles my hair. “You’re so smart, Miyoung-ah.”

I swat her hands away and attempt to put my hair back into place. “Yeah, yeah.” I pick my phone up from the coffee table and see that Taeyeon’s sent me a message saying that she’s boarded the plane and that she’ll call when she gets there. I reply with an okay and a I love you before proceeding to go onto the E! News website, and look at the pictures of Taeyeon at the airport. There were quite a few photos, so I flick through them, noting how cute Taeyeon looks, and how quiet Michelle has suddenly fallen.

“Tiffany?”

“Mhm?” I peel my eyes away from the screen and look at her. She’s fiddling with her fingers, looking a little pensive. “What’s up?”

She lifts her head, our eyes meeting. “I have something to tell you.”

“Okay,” I say slowly, locking my phone and leaning forward to put it back on the coffee table. “What is it?”

“I’m pregnant.”

I stop midway and look at her with wide eyes. “Are you being serious?” And when she nods and avoids my eyes, I drop my phone onto the table and quickly sit straight again. “Does anyone else know?”

“No.” She answers. “You’re the first person I’ve told.”

“What?” I ask, shocked. “Not even Donghae knows?”

She shakes her head. “I had the feeling that maybe I was, and I took the test this morning after Donghae left. And well…it was positive. I went to the hospital to make sure, and they confirmed that I was pregnant.”

I stare at her, my mouth unhinged as it all sinks in. Michelle is…pregnant. I struggle for words, trying to read her expression. “And…are you…are you…happy?”

She smiles and nods, putting her hand to her stomach. “Yeah, I guess so.”

I let out a breath. “Well, in that case, congratulations.” I pull her into my arms and hug her tight.

Wow, pregnant. I wasn’t expecting that.

* * *

“So, how was your flight?” I ask, rolling over onto my stomach.

The clock reads thirty-six minutes past midnight, and the day has been unbearably long without Kim Taeyeon by my side to help me kill time.

“It was okay, boring.” She replies through the crackle of an outstretched connection.

The sound of her voice eases every muscle in my body, and makes a smile come to my lips easier than it ever has.

“It’s nice to hear your voice.” I say softly, rolling to her side of the bed, resting my head on her pillow.

“Yeah, you too.” She replies. “It’s only been a day, but it feels like forever.”

“I know.” I sigh. “Can’t wait until you come home.”
She chuckles. “Me either.”

The sound of her breath and the scent of her pillow, with closed eyes I can imagine that she’s here with me.

“What time is i