Title: When the Mocking Bird Strikes

Author: -Yoshi

Reviewer: Kakurine039

Title: (5/5)

Amazing. I’ve yet to come across a story that instantly pulled me in from the title alone. This reminds me of the novel ‘To Kill a Mockingbird’; that was a great story. Just from looking at your title, I immediately had high hopes for this story. It made me wonder about the true meaning behind your use of a mockingbird.

Description and Foreword: (10/10)

The description and foreword really caught my attention. I feel like I was getting ready to watch one of those popular cop shows, and the trailer for it came on during the commercials. It also reminded of a summary of a mystery or a crime novel. The way you described the mockingbird gave me chills. I was able to clearly see the image in my head. You managed to provide a vivid description of the crime scene while leaving a hook at the end of your foreword. Very impressive!

Originality of Plot: (15/20)

This isn’t the first story I’ve read that revolves around crime, mystery, and the solving of these cases. I wouldn’t say that this is a common, over-used plotline, but it also isn’t unfamiliar in the fanfic world. However, what makes this story original is the use of the mockingbird. The way the murderer mocks other world-known killers, keeping the CSI agents guessing, wondering what’s going to happen, curious as to who the Mockingbird killer is going to mock next.

It almost reminds me of an old Japanese anime show called Ghost in the Shell: Stand Alone Complex. The entire first season was about a group of government agents trying to find the identity of the ‘Copycat’ killer, who went around killing innocent people by copying previous killer’s tactics. Kind of like yours–but I digress.

Mechanics (Grammar, Vocabulary, Punctuation, Spelling): (23/25)

Your grammar and spelling is amazing! I don’t think I came across any mistake worthy enough to be pointed out. It’s obvious you pay attention to the mechanics of your story. Your vocabulary was above average. I actually had to look up the definition of a few.

However, in chapter eight, you placed a comma after a dash.

Chapter Eight – He had been thinking of Sungyeol last night–he would grudgingly admit that–, but in no way had it been in a romantic sense.<