Pretending that you didn't care, pretending that you didn't know and pretending that you didn't like such things is difficult. How can you hate something that you really like? How can you set aside that feeling that is already overflowing and wanting to go outside. I feel like i am in a jail, no freedom, lock in that 4 cornered dark room and been watched by those wicked eyes. Actually I am not like this... When is the time i feel insecure about myself? When did i first feel that i wanted people to like me.

There is a moment in my life that i doubt myself... Not just doubt but i defy myself. Why am i born like this? Why i am so different? Why am i not born like other people did.

"You are so boring and plain."

I know... I know... Coz i don't have something to do with my life but to read and look at the night sky. But i didn't know that this will lead my life into the miserable world of the bully. I am so plain and boring that makes them feel irritated about it. I keep on talking about stars, the astronomy, the constellation, the zodiac. But... What's wrong with talking about something that i like? Is there no one who will going to listen to me? Is there no one who will join my world? What should i do? Well i be alone forever? I don't want that... The world is scary being alone. If people can't accept me the way i am now, i want to change. If people can't accept the me who is standing in front of them now i should change myself. I am afraid... I don't want to view the world without anyone. It's scary...it's cruel.

Class is already over and then Ryosuke approach Yuri who is fixing his things and then he saw Mirai who is also putting her things to her bag. "Yuri, are you going somewhere? Let's eat something outside."

"Eh? I'm going to the astronomy club today. I'm going to register." Yuri said.

"I didn't know that you are planning to join the club. This is rare."

"Maybe i am just too bored with my life so i want something new." Yuri answered him. "Mirai-chan, do you want to join a club as well. If you want you can join Astronomy Club."

"Why not... She said she likes..." Ryosuke started but Mirai immediately approach him and drag him far away from Yuri. Ryosuke is wondering what is this girl's planning to do. Both went to a corridor where no one is passing by that much and then Mirai look at him seriously. "Why did you drag me here?" he asked.

"Don't say it." Mirai pleaded to him and then she clap her hand and stick them together. "Please don't tell it to anyone. Everything that I told to you before. About the stars, how I love astronomy. Sip your mouth and don't say anything."

"Huh? What's wrong with saying it. You like those things right? You said it to me yesterday."

Mirai sigh, it's true that she said all these things but it is because she thought that he is nothing but a stranger and there is no chance he can say those things about her to others. That's the reason she is surprised when he saw him enter their classroom and even he is his classmate. "No, i don't like them." she lied and she even bite her lower lips.

"Huh? I really can't understand you."

"I hate those things" she snapped. "I am not interested with them. All that i told you yesterday are just lies. They are nothing but lies. I...i am just playing around with you. I can' t believe that you will trust me that easily when we just meet yesterday. You are so funny, what if i am a hoodlum and just trying to trick you." Mirai said while laughing sarcastically but she stop when she noticed that Ryosuke is being serious about it. "Wh...what's wrong?"

"I know that you are not like that so i trusted you." Ryosuke answered her. "What you show to me yesterday is your true self."

Mirai didn't say a thing upon hearing what just Ryosuke told him and she feels hit by his words. That time that she is talking to Ryosuke, she didn't doubt of saying those stuffs to him. That she likes astronomy stuffs, that she really loves stars. She is more determined to tell things to him because he is listening to her seriously and he is responding how she likes it to be.

"Just don't say it. I...i'm going." Mirai told him and then after that she runs away from him. Ryosuke just watch her as she leave and then put his both hands through his pant's pocket and start walking back to their classroom.

Even i explain myself no one will going to listen to it or no one will going to understand how i am feeling. Locking my other self so that everyone will accept me. Trying to hide something that i really love. Running away from who really i am. It's alright.. I know it's alright as long as someone will stay by my side. Being alone is scary... Being alone is something i don't want to experience anymore.

Mirai is on her way back to the classroom when she saw a lady who is holding so many piece of papers and seems like no one is helping here even others can already see her doing those stuffs and so without a second doubt she approach her and help her with those papers.

"It's fine i can handle these on my own." the girl told her when Mirai is about to help here.

"I will help you besides i don't have something to do. You are in my class right? I am Mirai Kurosawa."

The girl looks at Mirai first before she say anything to her. She rolled her eyes and give some paper to her to hold on. "I...i am Fujiko Kojima." she started to introduced herself. "Yeah i am in your class as well."

Name: Fujiko Kojima

Age:18 years old ; 3rd year high school ; Students Council Secretary

Likes: reading books

Dislikes: she doesn't like too many ice on her drinks

Personality: shy and introverted

"What's with papers? What are you planning to do with this?"

"Well, i am member of the student council and i am assigned to sort this paper."

"You are a member? Wow that's great."

"Not really..."

"What do you mean? Being in the student's council means that you are really great. You are smart and you have the authority. The school council president look so strict but i know she is doing her job well."

The two arrived to the classroom where Fujiko put the papers and then after that Mirai excuse herself to go to the library. She wanted to visit the library and to know what kind of books that are around the school. She is not with her friends so it is find to check on books related to Astronomy. While she is taking a look and found a book she is interested to check. She is about to pick that book but at the same time another hands is about to get the book. Mirai gasped and immediately drawn her hands and look at that someone who is interested to read the book and she is surprised when she saw Yuto standing besides her and starring at her.

"Are you interested with this book?" he asked her as he get the book and then give it to her but Mirai didn't want to accept it.

"Eh... No...no i just want to see it's cover coz it looks fascinating but only that one. I don't have plan on reading it." Mirai denied though deep down of her feelings she really wanted to read that book.

"Do you want to join the Astronomy Club? We are looking for members for this semester. If you are interested you can just go to our office and pass your application." Yuto told her.

"I'm sorry but i am not interested with it. " she lied to him.

"Alright i will not force you to do it but if you want you can come anytime. We are open for members and i am willing to accept you there." Yuto told her as he smiled. He is so tall, like a prince in those fairy tales. Prince that are riding those white horse and tried their protect the princess. She remembers that her new found friends are talking about him. How good looking, smart and kind he is. They also talk about him receiving confessions from other girls but he didn't accept anyone at all which they can't understand.

"I heard that the Astronomy Club is just a new club that start last year." Mirai started  a conversation when the two are reading books. "Wh...why did you started it?" Yuto look at Mirai and he is puzzled. Mirai think that maybe Yuto is thinking why she is interested in that kind of thing. "Do...don't get the wrong idea...I...i just want to know. "

Yuto chuckled a little and then he close the book that he is reading and then look at the window and then up to the sky. "People said that astronomy is boring because they can't appreciate it." he answered. "Being bored is a choice, it is not a feeling like sadness and happiness that you feel purely. People said that Astronomy is a boring subject but it is not... It is exciting, thrilling and enjoyable."

Don't you think it's too late already? To go back to my own old self? Why? Why i can't meet such kind of people who appreciate the things that i like before? I am always alone, in my world i am always alone but now... It's too late. My confidence is already broken.

"Do you think Astronomy is plain and boring?" Yuto asked her and that make her silent.

I...i didn't like it. Actually it is my world... But... But...

"I hate it."

...

"It is official. Yuri-sama joined the Astronomy Club." someone of Mirai's circle of friend said. " That means there are already 3 good looking guys in that club and plus the adviser. Only Ryosuke didn't join the club and then that will be the best club in our school."

"What do you mean?" Mirai asked.

"Oh yeah you are just new...All the members of the Astronomy Club are all good looking. The President Yuto Ishikawa, the Vice President which is Umika Kawashima and then the member Keito Ishikawa. There are only 3 official members of the club when it is established. Actually there are lots of girls who wanted to join the club but not because they are interested but because they wanted to get close  with the Ishikawa."

"Now that Yuri-sama joined already that will make the group stronger and popular."

"Yeah... Yeah... It is club of ikemen ne."

"But even there are lots of cute guys in there it is still boring. I am not interested with Astronomy. I fine it boring and nothing exciting. You just gazed at the stars and then what?"

"I agree... Agree... That's the reason i only wanted to join because of the guys but not because of the topic."

"It's boring and plain. It's not worth while to know about those things."

Mirai clench his hands to her skirt. She feels irritated about hearing her friends opinion about the things that she likes. She excuse herself and then run through the garden and stand behind a big tree and then she start kicking and punching the tree but not so hard coz she is afraid to wounded her hands. "How can you say those things? Did i say something bad about the things that you like? Did i say that your music are boring and i don't like it? I hate rock music, it is irritating and it has no sense. How can you like those kind of music which for me are just adding to the noise pollution.  I hate them... I hate them for saying those things about my Astronomy." Mirai complained. Finally she already bursted out what she is feeling all this time.

"How will they know if you will not tell it to them." someone said and Mirai was startled. She looks around but no one is in her back or on her side. Who said those words? But she can distinguish that voice, it is him. She look at the tree and then saw a shadow from the back. He is there, sitting like he has no problem.

"Do you really have lots of free time to eavesdrop."

"I went here first... I am not eavesdropping. You just came and started saying those things."

Mirai sit down on where she is standing and then drawn her legs towards her chin and then hug it using her arms. "You think I'm naive right? Acting like this... Saying that i hate something that i really like."

"Yeah i think you are contradicting yourself so much. I don't understand why you are doing this but i have no right to judge you either. In every action people do they have reasons behind it. I will not asked what is your reason but aren't you feeling bad about what you are doing? Contradicting what you really like, you are like going to the opposite of the current."

"In my last school i am bullied. I am really obsessed about Astronomy because of my father. I always brings book about it and then read it when break time and because of that i don't have time hanging around with and that time they thought about me as different and so... They start bullying me. At first it is only by words but it came a time that they used physical and so i am afraid to go back to school again." Mirai told the story to Ryosuke who is listening from the other side of the tree. "I'm so pathetic... I am so weak that i can't fight back. The only thing i can do is to cry and cry. I make mom and nee-chan worried again about me and i don't want that to happen again and so... I am... I am doing this."

Mirai heard a sound from her back and she thought that Ryosuke move from his place, she wanted to take a look but when she titled her head she is surprised that Ryosuke's face is already too near to her. They both blink their eyes at the same time and then immediately, Ryosuke drawn himself back and said sorry many times. "I...I'm sorry i didn't mean to surprised you."

"It's nothing." Mirai said but her heart is beating so fast that time.

"Do you want to see him? Sage?"

"Sage?"

"The dog... The one that we saw. I name him Sage." Ryosuke told her. "Isn't that a cute name."

"Eh?... I think it is weird." Mirai replied back and Ryosuke pout his lips but Mirai smiled and then chuckled a little. "Alright.... I want to see Sage."

Mirai waited in the park, Ryosuke get the dog. While she is alone, she is thinking about the things that just happened. She can' t handle it anymore, denying what she really likes. She really wanted to join the Astronomy Club and she really wanted to talk about it to everyone who has the same interest as her. Mirai is thinking about it when she heard a dog barking from a far. She immediately take a look and she saw the dog coming to her direction while Ryosuke is walking behind his back.

"Cute, Sage...you are so fluffy, i feel like I'm gonna die." Mirai mumbled as she ruffles the dog's hair and also playing with it. It is still so small so it is easy to lift him up. "Ryosuke, your house is just near here?"

"Actually no."

"Eh? So where did you go to get Sage?"

"I asked a maid from the house to bring Sage here. I just waited for them in the main gate." Ryosuke answered.

"You are really rich right? The Ishikawa family are so rich that i always see them in television."

"Really? I am not watching television anymore so i didn't know. It's true that our clan is rich but it is because of the people of the past generation." Ryosuke replied her back. "My parents just inherit everything and so they become rich."

"You are Ishikawa right? Then you know Yuto and the others?"

"Of course they are my relatives." he answered but not as excited as he is on the first question. Somehow, Mirai feels a little strange effect to Ryosuke when he mentioned Yuto's name to him but she just ignore and just keep on playing with Sage who seems like enjoying himself being touch on his tummy. Ryosuke watch as Mirai do that to the dog and that innocent smile makes it more enjoyable to watch.

"If you are contradicting yourself like what you are doing you will not be happy." Ryosuke said to her when she is about to ruffles Sage's head. She stop her hand and then just stare at the dog who is waiting for her to touch him. "I can't understand the feeling of being bullied and so i can't relate to what you are thinking but if you like something why should you hide it? Why do you need to change yourself for other people to accept you?"

"Isn't it normal? There is always another side of an individual that he or she only knows and no one else. What's wrong with changing myself to be like?"

"But you don't like it, you are not happy. You can't smile like this in front of what you call you friends. I am not saying that it is wrong, changing yourself is a choice but if you will do that just for the sake of the people to like you then it is vain. It is your life, it is not other people you should think about but yourself." he continued his words.

Myself? I am thinking about myself, i wanted to be accepted so i am doing this thing. Isn't it about myself? Everything is about myself... Everything is about my own self. But still... I can't still feel happy about it. I can't still smile about it. People at my age start to talk to me already but i am not happy at all. They are talking things which i am not interested with, they are laughing at things i didn't think funny. I'm so stupid... So naive... Stupid... I hate myself. Why am i like this? I...i love Astronomy so much... With astronomy his memory will be with me. Ryosuke is right... This is not what i want... I don't want to forget Astronomy...

Mirai's tears star to fall without her knowing. Ryosuke saw her crying and he feels bad about saying those words to her. He immediately get his handkerchief and offered it to her.

"I...i have my handkerchief..." Mirai told him and she looks at it to her bag but all of a sudden Ryosuke's hand touch her eyes and wipe away the tears that is about to fall down. She slowly lift her head and then have an eye to eye contact with Ryosuke. His face is too near to her but his calm face makes her feel relax.

"Life is something you need to enjoy with. It's yourself and you must be the one controlling it and not those people who want you to be like this and that."

"I... I want to join the Astronomy Club. I love the night sky so much, i love stars, i love the constellation, i love the zodiac, i love everything about them." Mirai cried as she wipes the tears that falls from her eyes. Ryosuke chuckled when he saw how Mirai cried, she looks like a child with her small height but he is happy that he can help her consider things.

...

Mirai went back home and then she went straight to her room and take a look at the application paper for Astronomy Club that she get when she went back to the school. She is excited to fill it up, write her name, every details that she need for it. While she is writing on it, Miori enters her room and sit down on her bed.

"What are you doing?" Miori asked her.

"I'm going to join the Astronomy Club." Mirai answered her happily.

"Change of heart? I thought you will not joining that club?"

"I just realize that i am running away from who really i am. Because of the experience of the past i almost forgot why i love Astronomy so much. I was blinded by other's people expectations that i didn't think about my own self. I will try to change myself but not  in a way that i need to run away from something that i really like. I will be strong... Stronger than i am before so that i will not be affected anymore. I will try my best to have friends that will accept me even without knowing those entertainment world. "

"I'm glad... " Miori told her and the she smiled.

"But you know what, my school is so strange. It seems like a world of ikemen. There are lots of good looking guys and looking at it they are all Ishikawa." Mirai asked when she is already done writing the details on her application paper.

"Ishikawa?" Miori asked. "I think i heard that family name before... Ishikawa...Ishikawa..." she repeated saying the word and when it already comes to her mind she immediately hit her head to the soft pillow just near her and then stare at her sister who looks innocent and thinking what's with the sudden reaction of her sister. "Why do you need to remind me of that name? Th...that's forbidden!"

"Huh? When is Ishikawa became a forbidden word to this house?" Mirai asked, she has no idea what is playing on her big sister's mind. Sometimes she thought that she acts so immature at her age and she even loves talking to her own self. 

"It's been forbidden since i start attending university. I told you a story before right? You know that guy who already dated almost all the girls in my class? He even make my best friend cry, he is an Ishikawa." Miori told her. "It's true that he is good looking and he is good at singing and he has great sense in fashion and also smart and rich but the fact that he is so cruel about hurting a maiden's heart makes me despised him and i cursed him to death." she continued and she even punch her pillow. "A guy like him has no right to be happy."

"Nee-chan, your words are too much already. Didn't we believe that there is always a reason why people act like that."

The conversation of the two sisters ended when their mother came and told them that dinner is already ready. The two went downstairs and then start eating dinner. They talk lots of things and then after that Mirai volunteer to wash the dishes and after that she went straight to her room. She write something on her diary, a notebook with an archer image on it. She write about everything that happened that day and her hopes about tomorrow.

The next morning, their mother drive them again back to their school. But Mirai said that she will stop over the grocery store near the school coz she need to buy something. She bought some candies in the grocery. On her way back to the school and was about to pass through the intersection, she accidentally saw Ryosuke who is patting a street cat. She immediately step back and hide herself to the wall, she is not expecting that the first guy she will meet is Ryosuke. She remembers what happened yesterday and she feels grateful to him but also embarrassed coz he saw her childish side.

She tried to sneak a look  to see what Ryosuke is doing or if he already walk away but when she is about to look she is shock when she saw him standing just in front of her. She immediately falls down from where she is standing and her heart start to beat faster and she gasp. All the candies that she buy all fall down from the ground. "That surprised me." she mumbled.

"So it's just you." Ryosuke told as if he is not concern about it.

"Yo...you surprised me." Mirai answered still can' t move to her place. She is really shock, he is just far away a while back but he is already in front of her. Is he someone who has superpower that can detect if someone is looking at him. She didn't expect anything about him, she thought that he will leave and will not do anything to her but to her surprised she feels a shadow suddenly move from her side. She tilted her head and saw Ryosuke picking up the candies that just fall down from the ground.

"Are you feeling fine already?" Ryosuke  asked her.

She watch Ryosuke as he stand up, he pick up all the candies that falls down the ground and then he stare at her. That gaze make her heart stop for a bit. She can't believe herself she is allured to his charm. "Can't you stand?" he asked and with a single second she saw a hand suddenly nearing her. "I will help you."

That moment Mirai feels like she is a character in the shoujo manga that she is reading. She feels it so romantic and she can't help herself looking at the face in front of her.

"Are you not going to stand up?" Ryosuke asked her out of the blue, making the romantic moment ruined into crumble. "Seems like you don't care that i can see your from here." he continued. Mirai suddenly blushed and feel irritated for some reason. She immediately stand up without holding on Ryosuke's hand and then fix herself before she face him.

"For your information i am wearing a short." Mirai told him.

"Then you shouldn't be flustered with what i just said. I am just kidding you know, besides how can I see your if your legs are also laying on the ground." he answered her back and then he give her the candies that he pick up a while back. "You really have this side of you, so childish like how you cried yesterday. Can't believe that you still like this kind of candies. So old fashioned..." he commented and then he smiled and then after he said those words he start walking away from her.

Mirai immediately move to her place and then she saw Ryosuke walking in front of her. He is already far but if she run she can reach him. She run, as fast as she can to reach him.

"Ryosuke" Mirai called his name and he turn his body around to the direction where he heard his name. "Thank you for yesterday. I'm going to join Astronomy Club today." she said as she waves her application paper. " Candies are not old fashioned. When we are young a friendship start with a single candy you give to that someone. It will never get old." she answered him and then she smiled. She get one of her candies and then grab his hand and put the candy on it. She close his hand and then she smiled, after doing that she immediately run away from him.

Ryosuke is left standing in that position. "What was just happened?" He thought to himself. He open his hands and then look at the candy that Mirai just give to him. It is a candy shape like a rabbit. He stare at it for a moment and then turn his body around where he can see Mira's back walking her way to school. He remembered what she just said a while back and then he can't himself to smile. He put the candy on his pocket and then he smiled "So childish." he whispered and then he continue to walk again.

...

"Didn't you said yesterday that you are not interested with Astronomy Club?" Yuri asked Mirai while the two are on their way to the club room. She asked Yuri to join her coz she feels nervous meeting the other member of the club." Girls are really fast in changing decisions and this is one reason they are hard to predict."

"Don't you like it? I am already joining the club."

"Eh? That is not what i mean and honestly i am glad that you will join hanging around with the Astronomy Club is better than hanging with those es." Yuri answered her back.

"Wh... What do you mean by your words?"

"Those girls that wanted to be friend with you are known for having a care free life. They are type of people who doesn't like anything seriously. They are just bored and lazy. At least you are different, but i know you are different from the very beginning. I know that you are not like them."

"Ho...how?"

"Actually i know that you are interested with the Astronomy Club and so i am surprised when you say something like that yesterday. I saw you looking at the poster that day we first meet and i saw the delight on your eyes. It seems like you are excited about it and... I really like it." Yuri told her. "That time i already decided that... I really wanted to be friends with you."