The party was a long night for everyone. Nobody managed to sleep much.

But the next day was going to be even longer…

"Hyung?"

Luhan groaned and turned to look at the owner of the voice that disturbed his sleep. His body ached as he moved and his headache was killing him. He desperately needed some aspirin. He can't remember the last time he was this hungover.

Oh my god.

The brightness of the room was hurting his eyes. It a took a minute or two before his eyes could fully focus his vision on his surroundings. Sehun was leaning over him, tilting his head with his eyes wide astonished by his hyung's state.

"Morning." Luhan's voice was weak and hoarse. He stretched and sat up to look at Sehun properly.

"Morning, hyung!" Sehun was a little too loud and excited. Luhan flinched at the Sehun's voice, which was at an uncomfortably high decibel. Sehun 's hand flew to his mouth and mouthed an apology cutely.

"What's up, Hunnie? What time is it?" Luhan looked at the alarm clock on his bedside table. It was 9:45am. Luhan groaned and pulled his cover over his head.

"Hyunggg~!! You promised to get up early to go out with me! You promised!" Sehun whined with a pout. Luhan ignored him and hid his head under his pillow. Sehun huffed and did his 'angry' face with his hands on his hips. He then giggled and jumped on top of Luhan on the bed, pulling the duvet away, grabbed his pillow and tackled his hyung playfully.

Luhan shrieked with fits of laughter and sat up to retaliate. The two of them swapped position and now Luhan was on top of Sehun, trapping him between his knees. He knew the young boy well and tickled him in his sensitive spots. Their bright laughters filled the room.

Luhan suddenly stopped and smiled at the sight of his love. All the ache in his body seemed to have disappeared for a moment. Sehun was his drug.

"Hyung, are you awake now?" Sehun asked cheekily, sticking his tongue out.

Luhan chuckled. "Yes, Sehunnie. I'm awake. Why am I up this early, though?" Luhan moved to a sitting position, releasing Sehun, who bounced excitedly on the bed.

"It's Hyunggie's birthday the day after tomorrow! You promised to come buy a cake and pick a present with me today, remember?" Sehun reminded him.

Yes, the moody blond's birthday was quickly approaching. Sehun had planned a simple dinner with their friends to celebrate. Just a small dinner at home because it was a school night, but mainly because Kris hated celebrating his birthday. Any birthday celebrations in the past was all for Sehun's sake.

"Oh yeah…" the thought of his best friend made Luhan cringe. The memories from last night hit him hard and he deeply regretted his drunken actions. He couldn't remember every detail but he knew that he had finally confessed to Kris about his feelings for Sehun. His secret was finally told and Luhan daren't imagine what Kris would do. The blond's face invaded his dreams last night. It was emotionless, yet Luhan could still see the hurt and disappointment in his eyes.

His stomach churned at the thought.

"Hyungg~ Hurry up and get ready!" Sehun was tugging at Luhan and shaking his body by his arm. Luhan chuckled and surrendered with his hands in the air.

"Alright, alright, I'm up. Go wait outside and give me ten minutes." Sehun cheered and hopped off his bed to leave the room so Luhan could get ready.

Luhan stared at the scarred boy as he skipped out of his room. The aches in his body returned with the stabbing pain in his chest.

How would Sehun react to my secrets? Would he...hate me? Luhan rubbed his temples and thought about the consequences of his foolish actions. He was scared.

He knew that Kris would find out one day but he didn't realise that the day would be so soon. He knew that the blond was a noble man, and wouldn't be fall as low as himself. Kris wouldn't stab him behind the back. He would let Luhan confess to Sehun about his secrets. And Luhan was frightened.

He thought back to last night and what triggered his breakdown as he brushed his teeth. Tears stung his eyes again.

*Flashback*

Luhan tucked the yawning minor into bed. He sat on the edge of the bed and held onto the younger's hand as he fell asleep. It was an old habit, one that Sehun couldn't quit.

Since his accident three years ago, Sehun has never managed to fall asleep without someone holding onto his hand. He needed the comfort and the security of knowing that someone was there for him while he slept. Kris was mainly the man for this job, Sehun's hand until the younger's grip on him loosens, indicating that he had fallen asleep.

This special routine between the two used to make Luhan quite jealous. Of course, when Kris was unavailable, Luhan would step up for the job but it wasn't quite the same. He noticed Sehun's twitch and nervousness whenever he was the one to sooth him to sleep. It was as if he felt uncomfortable with him. His envy made him childish and unreasonable. Once, he even calculated the difference in time it took for the two of them to sooth Sehun to sleep. The younger always took longer to fall asleep when it was Luhan who held his hand.

Luhan was bitter. He wanted to be the source of Sehun's comfort, but he knew he was being stupid. Nobody could replace Kris's importance in Sehun's heart.

His eyes watered. He couldn't bear the thought of being the third wheel, the spare part to the two most important people in his life.

Luhan then thought about Sehun's agony for the past three years. Most of his laughter were lies to cover up his pain. His simple wish to be normal and happy was ruined by Luhan. He was responsible for the boy's tragedy and took away the boy's hope when he agreed to plastic surgery. He didn't really deserve him.

He looked lovingly at the snoozing Sehun, fully asleep. He could never get tired of this sight. His steady breathing, his soft, pale skin, his long eye lashes, his defined jaw line, his pink lips. Every inch of Sehun was perfect to him.

Luhan frowned slightly at the long, dark scar across his eyes and it softly with his finger tips. But that never matter to Luhan. He loved Sehun. And that meant every single part of him.

"Do you know how perfect you are? Do you have any idea...how much I love you?" he whispered. His lips were trembling and a tear ran down his face. He placed a gentle kiss on Sehun's scar, hoping that the sleeping boy could hear his words, feel his love.

He knew that it was hopeless. Sehun wouldn't want to speak to him ever again once he found out that he was the culprit behind his scar. He couldn't bear to think anymore and left the bedroom.

He wanted to run away. He wasn't worthy of being in the same house as Sehun. He saw a bottle of whiskey on the kitchen counter and drank it savagely directly out of the bottle. He was angry and wanted release.

He wanted to cry his heart out.

*End Flashback*

He vaguely remembers Kris and Chanyeol hauling him back to his bedroom last night and took this as a good sign. At least his best friend didn't storm out and just leave him. He desperately wanted to talk to him. He needed to talk to him. He didn't want to leave things hanging and unresolved, but maybe it will have to wait unti