“Ellie, Ellie, Ellie, stop the car,” his voice came out hoarse because he hasn’t spoken since he gasped, looking at his phone.

            “Wae? Right now?” I looked at where we were. It was safe to stop a few hundred metres ahead. We were back in the city and it was almost eleven. I pulled over to the side of the road and the hazard lights. He silently fumbled out of his seatbelt and I watched him move, keeping his eyes on the phone. “Yah! What is it? I’m getting nervous here!” I said, annoyed. He rapidly shook his head and his hand at the same time.

            “Aniya aniya, sorry, but oh my gosh Ellie! Ottoke, what is this???” he said, in a tone I couldn’t understand. Was he happy? Was he worried? Was he excited about something? Or was he nervous about something? I eyed him suspiciously and grabbed the phone from him. He didn’t try to take it away from me. Instead, he used both his hands to cup his face with his brows furrowed, with an expression on his face that I couldn’t understand. I stared at his phone and it was a video. It was a video of me. I remembered the exact moment I took this video. I had just gotten home from work and my family wasn’t home. It was the perfect time for me to grab a guitar, sing, and record it. My hands trembled. I didn’t play the video, but exited out of it. I, then, read the article it came from.

“SHINee’s Key’s mysterious lady. Voice revealed???”

Where did they even get this??? I searched my mind, thinking hard, trying to remember where I posted the video, but I only posted it in my private account on Instagram. I only had one follower on it, which was my public account.

            “Is that really you?” Kibum said after letting me process what I just read in silence. I slowly nodded, staring at a blank space. I’ve never sung in public before, let alone an article online which has hundreds of comments at this moment. “Really?!?! I haven’t listened to it, I just read the article… I haven’t read the comments either…” he was unsure of what he was saying. “You look nervous… is it a bad video? Are you scared for the comments? You’re holding your guitar…To think about it, I’ve never actually heard you like, sing for real,” he said in English. I was so speechless that my mouth was left open and I was frozen in the driver’s seat.

            “A-aniya,” I cleared my throat. “that’s uh…it’s not worth watching, don’t worry, don’t click it,” I said. I only sang for my Aunt, really. I would hum or sing parts of songs now and then, but it was hard for me to sing in front of people if I wasn’t trying to be funny… The last, whole, song I sang was at her funeral…And that was it. I couldn’t enjoy being proud about singing anymore. It was more of a wound that needed to be left alone for it to heal. When I missed my Aunt, I’d grab a guitar and dedicate a song to her…hoping she could hear it.

            “Yeoboseyooo?” Key said, waving his hand in front of my face. “Are you okay? I won’t watch it if you don’t want me to, I promise,” he could sense how I was feeling. Rather, he could see how I was feeling. He started wiping my face. “Why are you crying, silly? You can be so emotional,” he smiled a smile that reached his eyes. “Let’s switch seats, I’ll take you home,” he said and we switched without saying a word. My body sank in the seat and before I knew it, he was waking me up, telling me I was home. I sat up straight. “Are you sure you’re okay? I’m sorry about the article… Is something else in your mind?” he asked, lifting my chin with his index finger. I smiled at him, the most genuine smile I could give at the moment.

            “I’m okay, don’t worry, really Kibum-ssi, you worry too much,” I joked, trying to ease his worries. “Thank you for a really lovely date, thank you for introducing me to your Grandmother and for taking me to your hometown,” I smiled a grateful smile.

            “Aigoo, of course! You had to meet the person who raised me beautifully and had me end up a great man,” he said smugly.

            “Oh man, you’re so full of yourself,” I mumbled quietly and rolled my eyes at him. “Okay okay, great man, thank you for today,” I said and grabbed his hand to shake it. “’till next time!” I winked and got out of the car.

            “Eeeeeeeeeey!” he rolled down the car window and waved at me. “A handshake, really?”

            “Mm-hmm! It’s our first date, we have to be proper, remember?” I smirked. I glanced around the street, glad that there weren’t any fans tonight.

            “Aish, it backfired on me… Araso, Ellie-ssi, sleep well, sweet dreams! Of meeeeeeeeee,” he drove off as he yelled that out. I chuckled lightly and went inside.

            Why can’t I sleep??? I want this blanket off me, but it should cover a part of my leg. Is it too hot in here? Are my pyjamas that thick? Aish! I kicked off my blanket and threw my pillow against the wall. I looked at the digital clock by my bed and it was already 3 in the morning. I’ve been tossing and turning for 3 hours?!

            “okay, I gotta get out of here,” I sighed. It’s been six days since Kibum and I’s first date, but I haven’t heard from him since then. Six days was normal to not have communication when I was still abroad and we weren’t…together, but now, it felt strange not to have heard back from him. I would call and it would go straight to voicemail, I’d text, but they remained unopened from his side. I decided to put on my workout clothes and runners and go for a run. I grabbed my keys, my headphones, and my phone. At first, I ran around in my neighbourhood, then turned to get to the main street then ended up in another neighbourhood I wasn’t familiar with. The freezing, winter air did its very best to freeze my face, but the rest of my body was warm from the run.

            “Good thing it’s not snowing,” I said under my breath. After a few more laps around the block, I started to jog back in the direction I came from. This neighbourhood was so unfamiliar that I was just following the street lamps. I stopped to tie my shoelaces that became undone. I could see a shadow far behind me from the side of my eyes. So, I turned off my music, but kept my headphones on. I didn’t want to let this person know behind me that I sensed he was following me. My heart started to beat faster and faster and before I knew it, I was hyperventilating. Often happened when I got nervous. I slowly turned my head to look behind me and it was so dark I couldn’t really see, but the stranger’s speed seemed to pick up. So, I ran faster and the figure jogged after me. Why isn’t there anyone else in the street???!!!

It took me a whole two, dumb minutes to realize I had a phone. I dialed “911” then realized that I was in Seoul.

            “Holy, what’s the police station number??? Ottoke,” my hands started sweating, almost letting the phone slip out of my hand. Not knowing what else to do, I dialed Kibum. “Please pick up, pick up, pick up,” I said, panting. Hyperventilating combined with an exhausting run. The stranger was still behind me following me.

            “Hello?” he picked up! I think I woke him up…

            “Kibum!” I whispered loudly. “I-I’m ou-out rrright now a-and I think…somebody’s following me,” I stammered.

            “What?! Where are you?” he said with a stern voice. His voice, unfaltering, showing no sign of weakness, which was good, ‘cause it was what I needed right now. If he showed me fear, I would freak out and probably pass out.

            “I, uh, I don’t know… It’s a neighbourhood across mine, but I’m running right now, l-looking for the main street,” I looked behind me and the man was still there. He was slowing down, but I definitely wasn’t.

            “Wehre yah gong, miss pretty,” the man slurred his words. I had no idea if he was drunk, on drugs of some sort, or he just talked like that. How is he still running? Why is he still following me???

            “I heard that! Is he close to you?? Keep running, do you hear me?” he sounded like he was rushing.

            “Kibum-aah… I can’t breathe…I-I’m h-hyperventilating, a-as usual,” my voice came out tired and broken.

            “Ellie, I want you to go to the nearest house and hide okay?? I’m coming, I’ll be there soon okay? Stay on the phone, do not hang up,” I didn’t answer him because I was getting so tired from running around. I found a house and entered through the back alley. I hid under some cartons that were piled on top of each other.

            “Weeeehre yo go? I am not stop lookiiiing,” the man said in English then chuckled. My body relaxed on top of the cold ground, feeling safer, hiding here.

            “Ellie, turn on your location, I’ll gps it now,” Kibum said, still on the line. I did as he instructed and tried to calm my breathing. If that man found me because of my breathing problems… Why now? I just wanted to run! I just couldn’t sleep!

            “I-I’ll be okkkk-ay right?” I asked Key.

            “sssssh honey, don’t talk,” he said in a soothing voice. “breath in….” I listened. “and out…” I exhaled. “Slowly… I’m almost there, okay? Wait a little bit more, I’m so sorry,” he continued. I heard the loud footsteps of the man again. Did he hear me? Did he know where I was? I could hear his footsteps getting closer. I wanted to scream at the phone, to yell out Key’s name, but I didn’t want this man to find me. It’s too late. This man’s feet were in front of my eyes. All he had to do was lift the cartons.