“What is wrong with you? Why do you have so much crap!” I was loading Kris’ car with my luggages.

            “This is already the cut-down version! I could’ve easily had 8 bags! But I got it down to 4 alright, it’s not that much,” I explained and struggled to put them in the trunk by myself. “Why aren’t you helping again?” I turned to her.

            “Uhh, because I got my nails done today and I don’t wanna ruin my brand-new nails just because you’re leaving to a country far, far away,” she said mockingly. I groaned did everything by myself. After long hugs with my parents and even my brother who has never hugged me before, I got in the car. I had Kris drive me instead because I probably wouldn’t be able to leave if I watched my family stand by on the other side of the airport. I teared up quietly in the car as we drove away from the house.

            “Got everything?” Kris asked.

            “Yep!” I said and clutched my purse. I was super organized with packing, because I loved doing it. I flew out on vacations a lot by myself, so I was used to doing it. Even though I had 4 bags for this trip. But it was understandable. I was going to be gone for a year!

            “No you don’t,” she said and reached for the compartment while we were at a stoplight.

            “Don’t what?” I asked.

            “Don’t have everything,” she said and pulled out a box out of the compartment drawer.

            “Waaaaah! What is this?” I asked the obvious.

            “A present, duh!” She dropped it on my lap and drove when the light turned green. “Merry Christmas,” she said coolly.

            “Aigooo! Thank you thank you!” I said and hugged her from the side. She smiled and told me to open it at the airport, I agreed because opening gifts in front of the person who gave it to you was always awkward to me.

            “I can’t believe you asked me to drive you to a 4am flight,” she said when we got on highway. “Wait from what I recall, you didn’t even ask, you just informed me,” she said pointed her index finger up in the air.

            “Hellooooooo, best friend duties,” I said and tilted my head side-to-side.

            “So, are you gonna contact Key-ssi when you get there?” she asked in an awkward way. We haven’t really talked about Key again because I was sensitive to it.

            “Mm..probably not,” I said and raised my shoulders. I looked at her from the corners of my eyes to see her reaction, but she just smiled. It was a weird smile too, I didn’t know what it meant, but I brushed it off.

            “I.cannot.believe.this.is.actually.happening,” I said with multiple pauses in between.

            “I knoooow! You’re so grown up!” she said excitedly.

            “Jeez, aren’t you at least a little bit sad?” I asked curiously.  

            “Mmm, not really!” she said and bobbing her head to the music.

            “Wow! Okay!” I said, a little hurt but I had jittery feelings in the pit of my stomach so I didn’t even care. It ended being a fast drive to the airport because there were barely any cars in the streets.

            “Am I supposed to wait for you to get inside or somethin?” she asked when I was unloading the trunk, by myself again.

            “Not really, i’m gonna check in and wait inside, plus parking’s expensive and you might make me pay for it,” I said and finished loading the bags onto an airport cart.

            “Okaaay, this is goodbye then!” she said casually.

            “What?” I said surprised at how un-emotional she was being. Usually it was her who was always sad when I’d fly out somewhere. “Yah! Could you at least show your sadness?” I complained.

            “I’m not sad though,” she said and smiled.

            “Aish, okay, i’m going, watch me go,” I looked back at her and slowly walked away.

            “Awwww, okay fine,” she ran to me and hugged me. “Be safe out there, okay? Call me when you need me, i’ll be here,” she said and let go of my hug.

            “That’s it? No tears?” I said, offended.

            “If I cry, you’ll cry, do you want that?” she asked.

            “Uh, good point!” I replied. “Alright, get back in that car and drive away,” I said and pushed her.

            “Awwwe, I can’t leave,” she said, acting all girly.

            “Eww, go away,” I turned to leave, while we were still joking around, so that neither of us would be sad.

            “HAHAHAA! Okay, bye best friend!!! See you! I’ll miss you, just for a little bit though!” she said as she got inside her car. I waved her goodbye and watched her drive away.

            “Aigoo,” I said to myself and walked inside the airport.

            After checking in, I bought a bottled water to take inside the plane with me and sat at my gate. A lot of Koreans who looked like students were waiting at the gate with me. They were probably going home for Christmas…

I considered posting a picture on Instagram, but I didn’t want Kibum to find out that I was going to be in Korea. Not that I knew if he was even still checking my Instagram for updates. I shrugged to get my mind off Key and decided to open Kris’ Christmas gift for me. I almost cried when I saw what was inside the sturdy white box. It was a bunch of pictures of us and moments and experiences. There were also letters, confetti, and a big white envelope. I held it up and decided not to read it yet, because I would probably cry.

            When it was time to board the plane, I texted my mom and Kris, I didn’t get replies because they were probably all sleeping already, so I took a snapchat of me walking inside the ramp leading to the plane. I felt so limited since I was trying not to use any social media and I was usually up to date with posting anything going on.  

            “Aigoo, here we go,” I muttered in Korean when I took my seat. I plugged in my earphones even though the flight attendant told me not to and played my airplane take-off song which was ‘S.E.O.U.L.’ by Super Junior and SNSD. (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EET9eaEGYEo )

This song had my heart beating for excitement and a small feeling of sadness. I was about to embark on an adventure, but I was leaving my loved ones behind. I shut my eyes and took in the moment and before I knew it, I fell asleep.

            7 hours into the flight, I was like a worm in my seat. I couldn’t stop moving because I couldn’t sit still for that long. I reeeeeeaaaaally hated long flights, which was why I barely flew out of North America. The girl sitting beside me seemed annoyed, but I couldn’t help it. So, I took out my phone and took out the polaroid picture of me and Kibum and looked at it.

            “Aigoo,” I said quietly. I wasn’t as sad as I was 3 months ago, but I was sad nevertheless. The girl beside me gasped out of nowhere. “Oh shoot,” I whispered to myself.  

            “Uh, excuse me, who is that?” she said and pointed at the picture I was holding. I froze then gathered myself to look at her.

            “Oh this? It’s my best friend back in Vancouver,” I smiled and explained through my teeth. I immediately put it back in my phone.

            “Oh really..It kinda looked like-” she started.

            “Oh looks like who?” I asked and pretended to be excited. She looked up to think, then back at me.

            “Mmm, maybe not,” she said and said sorry. Jeez, I almost made a big mistake.

            Finally! The plane has landed! 11 hours later. I stretched immediately after getting up to grab my carry-on luggage in the overhead bin. And after passing through immigration and baggage claim, I pushed my cart to exit the airport. It was around 10 in the evening by the time I got out and I had a huge headache. Suddenly, I heard screams around me, I looked around to see a huge group of people in front of the arrival doors.

            “SHINee! SHINee! SHINee!”

            “Kim Jonghyun!”

            “Minho!”

            “Onew!”

            “Maknae Taemin!”

            “Key!”

            “What?” I said out loud and looked behind me. I was almost out the door, but I couldn’t help but look back. Are they coming home from somewhere?

I tiptoed to see past the fangirls and their signs, but it was no use ‘cause I was too dang short. I grew frustrated and decided that I’d probably just get angry if I saw Key. But seeing this crowd of people for them late at night, I couldn’t help but be proud. It still hasn’t hit me that I was in Seoul, my dream place to visit. I ignored the fanchants behind me and tried hard to hail a cab, but every time I got a cab to stop for me, somebody else would rudely get on it. I was drained of energy to even argue and cause a fight, but I couldn’t help myself when I got a cab to stop and some chick pushed me aside with brute force to get on it herself. When she was about to get on, I grabbed her hand.

            “Yah, this cab was mine! Get your own!” I yelled and stretched my back. The girl looked at me, surprised that I was speaking in Korean because I looked nothing like it and threw my hand off her.

            “Then get another one,” she said and tried to get in, but I shut the door before she could.

            “I did! And everybody else took them,” I said back. I was so frustrated already, her glare at me was getting on my nerves. “Yah, are you gonna keep looking at me like that?” I added and pushed her shoulder. Okay, maybe i’m being too rude. Wait no, she needs to learn to be considerate.

We started pushing each other and I waved the cab driver to drive away instead of waiting, because i’m a considerate person and thinks about others! An airport security person had to pull us off each other because we were yelling and pulling each others’ hair. I couldn’t believe I was greeting Korea this way. This was when I noticed it had gotten quiet around us. This bleeping girl and I glared at each other while the guard pulled us apart. I decided to look around and we had gathered quite the audience. It didn’t take me long to spot SHINee watching this too. When my eyes hit Kibum’s gaze, my eyes widened. He didn’t change his expression, I didn’t know if he was in shock or if he knew it was me. I turned to grab my cart as quickly as I could and fortunately, got a cab to stop for me. I put my 4 heavy luggages inside the trunk and the crowd was still so quiet. Some girls came up to that cab-thief and asked if she was okay and everybody else glared at me. Jeez, she was the one trying to steal that cab!

When I was about to get on the cab, I took one last look at Kibum and then moved my eyes to the rest of the people watching.

            “Thank you Korea!” I yelled out in English, bowed, and got in my cab quickly. I didn’t wait to see their reactions, instead I gave the address of the place I was staying in to the driver. We drove through city and I couldn’t help but admire everything I saw. Even though I had just seen Key and SHINee, my mind was all over the place. I was just so happy to finally be in Korea. I texted my parents and Kris to let them know I had arrived safely and I got a ton of emojis from Kris, meaning she was super busy with something to even reply. My mom told me to get to my place safely and to not forget to eat. When I arrived at the residence I was supposed to stay in, I didn’t unpack or anything, I immediately laid down and passed out from exhaustion.