“Will you by fine by yourself honey?” Your mother asked you from where she was standing, in the middle of the doorway. She was dressed in a wonderful dress, finished off with a pair of nice heels and a beautiful clutch. Her hair was on point and her make up seemed flawless, it was during these moments that you started to understand you were adopted. Little did she know that you couldn’t hear a single thing of what she was saying. “_________.” She said your name in a stern voice before walking over towards you. Normally your mother wasn’t a heated person, but she could get a little bit annoying when she was nervous. A gasp escaped form your lips and your head turned to the left as she pulled one of your ear plugs out of your ear. Even now you could still hear the song blast through the room, maybe you should think about turning the volume down next time. With squeezed eyes your mother crossed her arms in front of her chest and stared at you, but you decided it was best to ignore that as you asked your question. “What is it?” You muttered as you got your attention back to your book that was laying onto your desk. Knowing that this was probably most of the attention she was going to get from you she gave up. “Your dad and I are leaving, I asked you if you’ll be able to handle yourself.” 

Before you looked up at her from your textbook and stopped your pen from writing down on your paper you raised your eyebrows. “I’ve always been able to manage before, I don’t see why it’s different this time.” You said and your mom nodded as if she had completely forgotten about that. You were annoyed because she was keeping you from your work, the longer she’d stand there the longer it would take before you’d be able to finish this task. The loose bun on top of your head moved from left to right as you focussed back onto your work, hoping she would get that as a sign that you wanted her to leave. Since she sighed deeply and placed a peck on top of your head you knew that she had figured it out. “Will you go and check on the neighbors if you find the time? We don’t want them to think we’re antisocial and egocentric.” The chuckle that came over her lips made you realize that she had tried to make a joke, but had failed since she was the only one laughing with it. You didn’t answer her and felt relieved when she finally walked out of the room and left you by yourself. When you heard the front door close you leaned back into your chair and brushed back the hairs that had escaped from your bun. 

It was exhausting, dealing with your weird parents and your weird life. There were so many things going on inside of your life, things you didn’t tell others because you didn’t know how they would react and how they’d deal with it. You had always been kind of a loner, an outsider, but you were sure that if you’d tell them your story that no one would never speak to you again. It wasn’t like you were a serial killer or had done some terrible bad things in your life. It was just that it was all so strange and complicated, that people would rather avoid you if they knew everything about it. First of all, your name wasn’t your real name, but you didn’t know what that real name was. Yes, strange, the name you were carrying now had been given to you by the people you now called your parents. They had adopted you at the age of seven, when you had been small enough to move on with your life but also old enough to understand that something wasn’t right. You couldn’t remember who your real parents were, you had no images of their faces, it was as if they had faded out of your memories. You barely remembered things about your previous life, only tatters, but nothing that could give you any information about who you were and where you had come from. 

It was hard, trying to get close to others and letting others in if you couldn’t even trust yourself. You had no idea who you were, so how could you ever open yourself up? You were so grateful for your parents for taking you in and for keep on trying no matter what, but for one reason or another you couldn’t bring yourself to show them the same thing in return. The new neighbors, you suddenly thought and groaned as you looked at the pile of work you still had to get done. Your schoolwork had always been an escape, your textbooks never judged you for who you were. They had moved in two days ago and your parents hadn’t had the time yet to step by and welcome them. The reason why you hadn’t gone by, probably because you just didn’t want to. You had heard that they had a son, who was your age and who’d join your school soon, and you weren’t interested in being the first new friend of the new guy. It would gain too much attention and if there was one thing you didn’t like then it was that. Your mom would probably get irritated because you didn’t go to them, but you’d just tell her you had more important things to do. 

The more you wrote the uglier your handwriting started to get, you were loosing your concentration. That was probably the reason why you liked studying so much, because you didn’t hav