Love Hurts

No one knows that better than I do. I’ve been broken, shattered and left to bleed to death on the sidewalks. No one knows how painful love is better than I do. It’s grown to the point that I couldn’t trust anyone, knowing that they will only break my already broken heart. And I don’t need to. I have philophobia, the fear of love. I can’t stand looking at mushy couples who hold hands and make out by the beach or cuddling on the park benches. Call me insane, call me lonely, but I don’t care. For years now, I’ve been living this way. Until she came, of course. She forced me to feel things that I have been afraid of. She made me see love in a different light. She is Jessica Jung. Because of her, I’ve learnt that love is different. Love is real and heart-warming, not cold and heart-breaking. Then I met Kim Taeyeon, the lover of love. She might even be cupid herself. I fell for her, forgetting everything else, forgetting who I had been, forgetting Jessica. Taeyeon makes me feel free without a care, while Jessica makes me feel grounded to earth. Taeyeon gives me wild dreams and fantasies, but Jessica makes me face harsh reality. But Taeyeon is cold and unyielding to my needs, giving me only my wants. Jessica is the complete opposite; she gives me only my needs and not my wants. I find it so difficult to choose. I can’t think. Love really hurts.