Jessica

I woke up feeling like crap. Well, that made sense, seeing that I went to bed feeling like crap and believing that my ex-girlfriend became an angel. Tiffany was already seated on a stool, eating cereal on the countertop. I approached her slowly, buying time to excuse my unusual behaviour yesterday. She wore a thoughtful expression, mixed with a little excitement. It took my breath away just by watching the unconsciously elegant and graceful girl before me. I shook off my dazed state and smiled at her. She returned my smile, but added a tint of confusion and annoyance in it.

“Why were you so upset yesterday?” she asked as she scooped up another spoonful of cereal and directed it to .

I faked a laugh. “Upset? I wasn’t upset.”

She made a face and chucked the spoon back into the bowl, eyebrows raised. “I live with you. And I know you enough to know that you weren’t yourself yesterday. So, don’t bother trying to hide it.”

“I’m sorry. It’s just that…my sister is a really touchy subject for me. I haven’t been a good sister to her and to be reminded of that is like you slapping me in the face,” I sighed, lying convincingly enough for Tiffany to believe.

And fortunately, she did. She gave me a sorry, sympathetic smile and touched my hand reassuringly. However pointless it was to lie to Tiffany, I congratulated myself for my first lie to Tiffany. Truthfully, I still have yet to figure out why I felt that burning rage inside of me when I heard Taeyeon’s name. And the fact remains that she had said Taeyeon’s name effortlessly and easily compared to how she said mine, even after only meeting her for a day. Just the thought of it made me want to hit something. But now, Tiffany’s face grew into confusion again as she looked at me with curious amusement.

“Would it hurt you that bad if I slapped you?”

I frowned. “It’s a slap. Of course it’d hurt.”

She wrinkled her nose and arched her eyebrows again. “That’s not what I meant. I mean, would it hurt you more if I were the one slapping you?”

“You mean, if you had put in more strength?” I asked, feigning confusion.

I knew what she meant, but I dodged her questions easily. I didn’t want her to know that if she were to slap me, my world will crumble. Heck, if Yuri had ever slapped me back then, I wouldn’t even think I would be the way I was now. A slap meant a lot of things to me. It meant that the trust between us is dead, that the love she felt for me had begun to decrease. It meant that she was siding with someone else and going against me. Additionally, I had never been slapped before. Tiffany gave up, shaking her head as she continued to eat her cereal.

“Nevermind. Forget I asked.”

“So, what are we doing today?” I leaned against the countertop, my elbows propping my chin up as I stared at her with twinkling, expectant eyes.

“I’m going out with Taeyeon,” the excitement was back on her face. “She asked me this morning when you were asleep. I said yes.”

I backed up, straightening up and looking straight in her eyes to see if she was just kidding around with me. Apparently, she was telling the truth.

“Wait. Who gave you the permission to go out with that danshin?” I snapped and she recoiled away from me, frowning.

“Whose permission do I need to ask for?” she fired back.

I thought for a while. “Mine.”

She barked a laugh, almost falling over from her seat. “Your permission, Jessica? For a fact, we’re not even related in any way! And why do I need permission from you to go out with Taeyeon?”

I could have just told her off and confined her in my apartment for the rest of the day, but something held me back. What she had said actually hurt. And I didn’t want her to leave or feel hurt just because I was selfish. After Yuri, I had no intention of hurting anyone else, of course, I was an exception. I looked away from her eyes that burned with determination.

“Fine, go. Whatever, I don’t care,” I wasn’t aware that I had said those words coldly.

I had no idea that whatever I did next felt cold towards her. In my mind, it was only a defence mechanism to hide how hurt or angry I was. Tears were threatening to fall, but I didn’t let them fall. Why do I always cry when angry? I cursed my ‘gift’ and headed for the bathroom. I slammed my hands on the edges of the sink to release my anger and didn’t feel any pain when some blood started to seep out of my bandaged hands. If she wanted to go out with Taeyeon so much, then she should go. Why was I so defensive? Could it be that I have feelings for her too? Is this my body’s way of telling me that I had fallen for her?

But tears fell, realising that the saddest part was that Tiffany didn’t even acknowledge me feelings and was probably mistaking that outburst for something else. Tiffany didn’t even see how painful it was for me to let her go to meet Taeyeon. This is my story, then. I will be the one who heals her broken heart, the noble one who lets Tiffany go to Taeyeon instead of me, and I will be the one who will pick up the pieces of her broken heart once Taeyeon leaves her. I will be by her side all the time and I was barely even acknowledged, barely even comparable to Taeyeon. From now onwards, I have to be controlled around her and listen to her when she talks to me about Taeyeon and how great she probably was. I’ll just have to show her that I’m happy simply because she was too.

Readers’ Note:

Aww…Jessica’s sad. Well, this chapter focuses more of Jessica’s reaction and her feelings for Tiffany, who had unknowingly just hurt Jessica really badly. Well, since you reader’s want JeTi, I’m going to have no choice but to make Taeyeon shatter Tiffany’s heart until she crawls back to Jessica. By the way, school has started and I feel like crap. Tight schedule and CCAs, I think I’m going to die. Wish me the best.

Thank you for reading!

Yours Faithfully
Jazzign