It had been two days since I got the call about Logan, two miserably long horrible days.

My parents came to visit the day after she was admitted and had to leave back to Japan the day after.

I didn't go to say goodbye.

I suppose that seems insensitive and downright rude to not go say goodbye to my parents who are living across the world, parents who raised me and gave me more than I could want but...

Logan was more important now.

Logan had become my life, she was more important than baseball. More important than school, more important that air at this point. She was the only thing I cared about anymore and the fact that I had seen her just hours before her father almost killed her was a knuckle punch to the face. She was almost gone, out of my reach. I almost lost her forever... 

That was heartbreaking enough.

Everyday I fell asleep and woke up beside her, like I had wanted for a long time. But not like this, not when she was lying in a hospital bed with a constant look of pain painted across her beautiful features. Her hair losing it's shine being pulled back into a lose ill-fitting ponytail, her normally tanned skin losing color and fading to a pale white. I won't even start on how much weight she was losing.

Logan Emaiy, my fiancee was in a coma.

The day the doctor came to tell me I didn't believe it, she had told me twenty minutes before she loved me. She had held my hand like her life depended on it and now her life was slipping away right out from under me. It just didn't seem fair, not to me but to her. What had she done to deserve this? She didn't deserve anything she was handed in life. Logan was the purest person I knew and her life's deck just plain old .

"Knock knock," Warren brought me away from my pity filled thoughts. "How is she?"

Warren had come everyday just as I, but he didn't stay overnight. He had put faith in me that I would protect her.

"Still sleeping." That's what we called it, sleeping. She wasn't in a coma, just taking a nap.

"You know Logan, that girl was practically born tired and ready for a nap." He let out a tiny laugh. We both knew that was true, and we both knew that our formalities were just that. Formalities, we were trying to mask pain. Helping each other through this.

"How's Stevie and Dillion?" I asked roughly, my voice worn out from the constant sobs and cries.

"Better, they just went home to sleep a few. I'm sure they're just as tired." 

"I imagine."

"You know, Kazuya. It might be a good idea for you to go home for a while too. Just for a couple hours, take a shower, shave, get some rest. Maybe go for a run, Logan tells me all the time how you like to run. It might clear your head a little. I'll stay with her until you come back." He said walking further into the room, I wanted to reject the idea but it sounded pretty good. Especially the shaving part, I had started to grow some serious stubble and it was quite itchy.

So that I did.

Couch picked me up and after a hour or two of restless non-REM sleep I laced up my nikes and ran eight miles, going over my life in my head for a third of it and drowning out in music the rest ot the way.

"Back." I called out to Couch meakly, he nodded towards me and went back to reviewing old game tapes. I knew he was putting on a brave face for me, he was just as worried about Logan as I was. "I'm gonna shower, okay?" I said already walking towards the bathroom. He grunted something in response and took a gulp of his beer.

I stood under the hot water and tried to feel worry and sweat wash of me as I usually did under a shower head, but this time it wasn't working. I just found myself going on a sort of numbing autopilot, washing my hair scrubbing sweat and mud off my body and drying off under a cool fan in a steamy bathroom.

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I'M BACK! so i'm really sorry i've been somewhat neglecting you guys but i've had this giant project to do and it took me forever, i didnt even sleep! but im back now i'll hopefully be consistent. I've been reading a lot of John Green lately (and Janet Evanovich) so i've had the urge to write for a while. Sorry that chapters so short but some excitement comes in the chapters ahead. till then! Jia~