Chapter 7- Why

I was out of the hotel and I kept on running. I ran as fast as my bruised body would let me. My bruises still hurt, but the pain from running is better than being back at the hotel. Where am I running to? Hell knows. There are so many questions that were left unanswered. Why can’t I remember the concert yesterday? What happened during the concert? What wish is Yoochun talking about? And who... who the hell is Kim Jaejoong?

Once I was out of the hotel’s parking lot, I stopped running. I checked around the block to see if there were Cassies or reporters around; thank God there were none.

I continued to walk until I got tired and the pain from the bruises was too painful to ignore. I was already far from the hotel, so it was okay if I stopped running. I heard my stomach grumble. I checked my pockets to see if I had my wallet or something, so I can buy food.

I had nothing...literally. I had nothing except my phone. No money...nothing. I was even in my sweat pants and a simple white shirt. Its fall already but the weather wasn’t that bad, so I wasn’t freezing. It was sort of chilly, but not that cold that a shirt isn’t enough. It was breezy... a nice autumn day.

“But I’m hungry...” I said to myself.

I went to the nearest fast food place and entered a fast food restaurant called ‘Subway’. I don’t know how to get food but I’m hungry.

I entered the fast-food restaurant and said in my broken English, “Have sandwich? I sing.”

The person who was working there just looked at me and said, “What would you like Sir?”

“Anything. I’ll sing for food... I no money,” I said in broken English.

The cashier employee looked hesitant and said, “Sorry Sir but I can’t do that.”

“I’m famous. I’m from Dong Bang Shin Ki... a famous band from South Korea,” I tried again.

“I don’t know that band...sorry Sir,” the cashier apologized.

My stomach grumbled and I sighed. On top of being hungry, my bruises were sore. I closed my eyes and started to sing the only English song that I could think of at the moment which was Insomnia by Craig David.

“I never thought that I'd fall in love, love, love, love
But it grew from a simple crush, crush, crush, crush
Being without you girl, I was all messed up, up, up, up
When you walked out, said that you'd had enough-nough-nough-nough

Been a fool, girl I know
Didn't expect this is how things would go
Maybe in time, you'll change your mind
Now looking back I wish I could rewind

Because I can't sleep till you're next to me
No I can't live without you no more
Oh I stay up till you're next to me
Till this house feels like it did before
Feels like insomnia ah ah, Feels like insomnia ah ah
Feels like insomnia ah ah, Feels like insomnia ah ah”

I sang the first part of the song when the girl stopped me and said, “Okay... okay. I’ll pay for you since you look beaten up. I feel bad for your bruises and you sing really well. But don’t say lies about something that would happen in one in a million like being a celebrity. Yeah believe you. I believe that you are a great singer but don’t lie about being famous.”

“But I am from DBSK. We are well known throughout Asia. Anyways thank you... thank you so much,” I thanked the girl giving her multiple 90 degree bows.

I heard the girl chuckle and she said, “You’re welcome.”

She gave me my sandwich and I sat on one of the tables. I was eating for a while when I realized whether or not I should go back to the hotel or wander around a city I don’t know. If I don’t head back, where would I go? Would I sleep on the streets?

Thank God I had my phone. I dialed Kyuhyun’s number. After a few rings I heard, “Yah... it’s in the middle of the night what do you want?”

I checked the time and it was already 3:42 pm here, so it must be around 4:42 am there. Ooops... I forgot the different time zones.

“Kyuhyun... I need help,” I said in my best desperate voice.

I heard some shuffling sounds on the other side of the phone and heard him say, “Yeah Min... what is it? Are you okay?”

Kyuhyun’s voice was gentler than before. I guess my voice sounded more desperate than I planned. “No not really. Yoochun, Yunho and Junsu are acting weird Kyu. They keep blaming me for something I don’t remember. I keep hearing stories about something that I did during a concert last night. To make things weirder, I don’t remember performing at a concert. I heard about how someone made the Cassies disappointed. I recently found out that I was the one who made the Cassies disappointed but I don’t remember what I did. I don’t know why I don’t remember,” I told Kyuhyun. Without realizing, tears were falling from my eyes.

I tried to wipe them away but more tears were replacing the previous tears. I could feel my throat become dry.

“Min...  Why do you think you don’t remember? I’ll ask you a few things then. It might help you remember,” Kyuhyun stated.

“Okay...” I answered suspiciously. My voice cracked when I answered.

“What was the last thing you remember?” Kyuhyun asked.

“I remember boarding the plane to Toronto for the concert,” I answered through my cracked voice. My voice was hoarse from crying.

“What do you remember happening next?” Kyuhyun asked.

“I woke up this morning and the other members got mad at me for not knowing this person,” I answered Kyuhyun.

“So you don’t remember the concert at all? You guys were scheduled to have two concerts in Toronto... one on Friday and one on Saturday. Fine... who are you?” Kyuhyun asked seriously.

“Are you kidding me right now Kyu?” I asked annoyed.

“Just answer me Min. What’s your full name? When’s your birthday?” Kyu continued to ask me.

I sighed at Kyuhyun’s ridiculous comment but complied with his request. “I’m Shim Changmin. My birthday is February 18, 1988. What’s up with your ridiculous questions?” I ask him irritably.

He ignored my question and continued to ask me questions. “What’s your occupation?”

“I’m a singer,” I said simply.

“When did you debut? Are you a solo singer or did you debut in a group?” Kyuhyun continued to interrogate me. What’s the point of these pointless questions?

“I debuted on December 23, 2003 and debuted in a group. For crying out loud Kyu...I’m in the same company as you. Why don’t you know? I thought we were friends. I thought you knew this before. We were friends before you debuted in Super Junior. Hell... I thought we were friends before I debuted with Dong Bang Shin Ki. Seriously... what is up with you too? Why do you think I would forget important things like that? You guys are all acting weird. Even Yunho, Junsu and Yoochun are acting weird,” I told Kyuhyun frustrated. I thought he could help me but Kyuhyun is confusing me even more.

“How come you keep on saying Yunho, Junsu and Yoochun are acting weird? What did they say? What did they do,” Kyuhyun asked me.

“I don’t know,” I yelled at him. I was now sobbing and said, “I don’t know Kyu. I really don’t know. They brought in a person in our hotel room and everyone knows him. They are mad at me for not knowing him. Apparently I’m supposed to know him. They are mad at me because I don’t remember who the guy is. How can they blame me for not knowing a person?”

“Who’s ‘they’? You said they are mad at you. Who’s ‘they’?” Kyuhyun asked.

“Weren’t you listening? Yunho, Yoochun and Junsu are acting weird.  They are mad at me for not knowing him,” I answered Kyuhyun irritably.

“What about Jaejoong hyung? Where is he? Why are Yunho, Yoochun, and Junsu hyungs the only ones with you? I thought you guys had a concert. There was even news about your concert in Toronto,” Kyuhyun asked.

I sighed exhaustedly and yelled, “Not you too Kyu. Not you too! They are all mad at me because of that stupid guy who appeared in our hotel room. His name is Jaejoong. How do you even know him? He’s the reason why Yunho, Yoochun and Junsu are mad at me... it’s because of him. It’s because of Jaejoong.”

“What do you mean you don’t remember Jaejoong? He debuted in DBSK with you. How come you don’t remember? There were even news about your concert yesterday and how you kissed Jaejoong hyung on stage twice. There was even a fan cam to show it. It looked like you were the one who kissed him, not the other way around,” Kyuhyun tried to explain.

My tears that were falling eventually stopped. “Is he really a member of DBSK? Did he really debut with us? How come I don’t remember him? How come all I remember is Yunho, Yoochun and Junsu? Is that what happened yesterday? I kissed Jaejoong during the concert? Is that why there is chaos in the airport in Anaheim? What’s the reason for the Cassies being split though? Wait... is Jaemin my couple name with Jaejoong?” I asked Kyuhyun.

“Yeah he is. He’s a member of DBSK since the beginning. Jaejoong debuted with you guys. Yeah... I was watching the news while waiting in the dressing room before our performance for Music Core and your concert were all over the news. They did a coverage of your concert and showed the fan cam of your kiss,” Kyuhyun asked me. “I don’t know why Cassies are being split. Yeah Min... Jaemin is your couple name with Jae hyung. Why did you kiss Jaejoong? Do you like Jaejoong or was it fan service?” Kyuhyun continued.

“No... Of course I don’t. How can I like someone I don’t remember?” I told him. “So if he was a member since the beginning, why did I forget him? Why can’t I remember the concert last night?” I asked Kyuhyun.

“I don’t know Min. I don’t know. I’m going to go now okay? I still have a schedule tomorrow and I’m scared I would be late if I don’t wake up on time. I suggest you to go back to your hotel and sleep on it. Think about it and talk to them after you think about it...all of them, even Jaejoong hyung. Even though you don’t remember him, he is a part of the group and you might remember him again. Just sleep on it and try to remember okay Min? Goodnight,” Kyuhyun said.

He hanged up before I could respond. I thank the girl for the sandwich and began to walk back to the hotel.

Yoochun’s words still echoes in my head. “His wish came true...” What wish is he talking about? The other question that currently surrounds my head is why... why did I only forget Jaejoong? Why do I remember everyone else except for him? Why?