January 2011, 23:41

“Good job everyone!”

Words of approval and encouragement can be heard as everyone started packing up as soon as the director had called it a day.

Filming had gone well, and everyone had been satisfied with their work. Among the distinct chattering, I excused myself to go to a quieter area, seeking some sort of privacy even if just for a few minutes.

“Where are you going? It’s time to go home.” Turning around, I could see my two group members waiting for me.

“Don’t worry, I’ll be back soon. Go on ahead without me, I’m just going up get some fresh air for a while” was my only assurance as I hurried out of the studio.

23:53

I managed to find myself in a somewhat secluded place with no trace of any other person in sight. Resting my back against the wall, I took out my phone and unlocked it, opening the contacts and typing out the familiar number.

What are you doing?

Honestly? I don’t even know.

Its already been months, how are you even sure if he has the same number?

I don’t. I’m not sure and maybe that’s what makes it more terrifying. It’s only a single thread of hope left, barely holding on.

Unconsciously, I reached my hand up to my neck and gripped on the pendant. My lips quirked up in a small smile as I remembered the fond memory.

Always keep the faith huh?

Hovering my thumb over the screen, I finally pressed the voicemail button.

Why are you bothering with this? You’ve moved on, haven’t you?

Even if its been far too long, even if he hates me, even if I know he probably won’t respond, I just want some type of closure. I don’t think I can keep going on unless I get these feelings out.

In the end, I never really ended up telling him, did I? This is the last chance before I say goodbye. Officially.

23:57

Closing my eyes, I began.

Why did I end up falling for you?

Why did I end up falling for you?

No matter how much time has passed

I still thought you were right here

But you’ve already chosen a different path

Why couldn’t I call out to you at all?

Every day and night growing emotions

And words overflow

But I realized that

They’d never reach you again

Since that day I first met you

I felt like I already knew you

You and I melded into each other so smoothly

It was natural for me to be where you were

The two of us grew up together

But you’ve already chosen a different path

Why did I end up falling for you?

No matter how much time has passed

I still thought you were right here

Now we can’t turn back

Why did I end up falling for you?

How we were before

We can’t return to it anymore (I’ve thought it through, thought it through)

Why didn’t I hold on to your hand?

No matter how much time has passed

You should’ve always been by my side (never changing)

But still, even if I’m nowhere near you anymore

I’m praying that you

May be happy for eternity

No matter how much that would make me lonely (no matter how lonely)

Finally opening my eyes, I took a deep breath and pressed the ‘send’ button.

00:00

Voicemail failed to send.