Taeyeon is finally back and I know it’s only been a week, but after having the habit to meet everyday, a week really seem such a long time.

 

She arrived yesterday’s evening and she said she really wants to see me for lunch today. I guess it’s her way of saying that she missed me too? Well I didn’t dare to say ‘I miss you’ because I reckon that will be too much. So having her saying that she really wants to see me kind of assure me that we’re not walking on a treadmill. There’s progress in our so-called relationship.

 

I’m super excited and I almost run to the restaurant when it’s time for lunch. She sent me a text saying she’s already there and securing a table for us since the restaurant probably will be packed on a Monday.

 

When I arrive at the restaurant, it’s pack with people. I look around and catch a glimpse of Taeyeon, but a tall man in front of me kind of block my view. I walk around him and meet with a view of a laughing Taeyeon with a very beautiful woman sitting across of her, also laughing.

 

I stop on my tracks.

 

Who the hell is that woman?! What is she doing on my chair?! Why are they laughing?! And most importantly, why is she so beautiful?!

 

My mood is ruined straight away. Gone the excited and happy feelings. Replaces by jealousy and disappointment. But reality hits me hard. I can’t be jealous and disappointed. Yes, Taeyeon told me she likes me and wants to date me someday. But she never promises me anything. She’s not committed to me. She doesn’t have any obligation to me whatsoever.

 

She could be dating this sickeningly beautiful woman and I can’t be mad at her. I can’t be jealous because she’s not mine.

 

I don’t know how long I’m standing there until Taeyeon finally stop laughing and turn her head and see me.

 

The cute smile instantly appears, but I feel numb. I smile back half-heartedly and approach the table.

 

Taeyeon greets me still with a smile plaster on her face, “Hi!”

 

“Hey.”

 

Her smile is gone and changes into a confused look. She opens to say something, but I divert my gaze to the woman on my chair. The woman stands up and suddenly bows while greeting me.

 

“Oh, right! Tiffany, this is Yoona, and Yoona, this is Tiffany.”

She offers her hand and I don’t want to be rude, so I shake her hand.

“Nice to meet you, Tiffany-ssi.” She says with a dazzling smile. Damn it she really is a beautiful woman. But, no, it is not nice to meet you!

 

I don’t want to lie, but (again) I don’t want to be rude also, so I reply with, “Me too, Yoona-ssi.”

 

Me too?! Isn’t it supposed to be ‘You too’? Oh whatever.

 

“Yoona is going to join us for lunch!” Taeyeon announces while pulling another chair for me.

“I don’t want to interrupt, Un-”

“You’re not and I insist, Yoona-ah.” Taeyeon smiles to her and sits back down on her chair.

 

I’m thinking to just walk away but I was not raised to be an impolite person. Therefore I sit on my chair and muster all my will to smile.

 

 

All throughout lunch, I was cursing on my mind. Turns out Yoona is Taeyeon’s secretary at the office and I had no idea why she ‘insisted’ that her secretary joined us for lunch.

 

For once, I’m grateful we cut the lunchtime short because Taeyeon has another meeting. Before we part, Taeyeon threw me a worried glance but I didn’t think much about it because it might just be my imagination.

 

I got back on my cubicle and a text comes from Taeyeon.

 

Taeyeon: Fany-ah, is everything okay?

Me: Yes.  

 

My cellphone doesn’t buzz after I send the reply and slam it a little bit on the table.

 

I don’t like that Yoona. Eventhough she seems nice and very polite. I don’t like her because I’m utterly jealous of her. But I can’t be jealous because Kim Taeyeon and I are just friends!

 

All of a sudden, my cellphone buzzes, indicating an incoming call. It’s Taeyeon. I contemplate for a moment before my finger moves on its own to tap the green button.

 

“Hello? Fany?”

I sigh quietly before I answer, “Yes?”

“Um... are you really okay?”

“Yes I am.”

She doesn’t say anything back and I really don’t want to converse with her at the moment.

 

“Why are you calling me? Don’t you have a meeting?”

“I- I do. It’s just....... you didn’t look okay all through lunch and I’m just..... worried.”

I let out another sigh and not bother to do it quietly this time, “Don’t worry about me. Just worry about your secre-”

 

Oh sh*t! What did I just almost slip out?! Stupid Hwang!

 

The line is silence. Should I just hang up?

 

“Fany-ah..... are you......... jealous?”

I’m feeling defensive and I don’t think properly when I say, “I’m not entitled to be jealous.”

 

Another silence ensues, but not for long.

 

“I have to go to that meeting now. But meet me after work? Please?”

 

“Okay.”

“Okay, I’ll text you later then.”

“Sure.”

 

She hangs up and I hate how much I like her at this point.

 

*

 

I enter the coffee shop warily and instantly hear my name’s being called,

“Tiffany!”

 

I look to the source and Taeyeon’s waving her hand from a table for two. The chair in front of her is empty so I’m a bit relieved.

 

Taeyeon stands up when I got closer to the table and suddenly, she hugs me.

 

I freeze.

 

Her arms go around me and I can feel the front side of her body pressing up a little bit on mine. 

As if that’s not enough to melt my whole being, she has to whisper right in my ear, “I miss you.”

 

I literally hold my breath and I swear if she doesn’t let go the next second, I’m going to hyperventilate right there on her arms.

 

She steps back probably half a second later and my brain still processing what she just did to me. Even though my brain is rebooting, but my eyesight is working well and I see Taeyeon’s blushing while scratching her neck awkwardly cutely.

 

She sits down on her chair while clearing and seemingly already compose herself (while I’m still standing like a fool, waiting for my brain to finish rebooting) when she says, “You’re not going to order some coffee?”

 

Thankfully my mouth is not as slow as my brain, “O-oh, yeah.” and my legs is also quick on their feet, for I’m walking to the counter right after my mouth close.

 

There’s a queue and I’ve never felt more grateful for a long queue in my whole life. Because I need time to calm the hell down!

 

Oh my God!!! Did Kim Taeyeon really just hugged me and whispered ‘I miss you’ to me?! Am I in a kind of inception dream or something?

 

OMG OMG OMG!

 

Breathe, Hwang Miyoung, breathe. There’s no time to reboot my brain again, so I need to keep it together!

 

But, but, she really hugs me and-and-and whisper in my ear-

 

No, wait! I was mad at her. But now I’m swooning because of a simple hug and three simple words like that?!

 

...........................

 

Okay, hold up! Wait a second. She doesn’t have the rights to do that to me!!! I mean friends don’t hug each other and say they miss each other after having lunch a couple hours before. And how about that secretary she brought to lunch?!

 

If I can’t be jealous, then she can’t hug me and say sweet things like that to me! She needs to make us official first.

 

Therefore, as I order, wait, and finally take my coffee, I made up my mind to tell her I’m done with waiting. Either she dates me or she doesn’t. I’m going to get my answer now!

 

I walk back to the table and she looks up at me from her cellphone when I pull out my chair and she smiles right through my soul.

 

My determination crumbles down at the cute sight. Oh who am I kidding, I was smiling ever since I queued and I don’t think I can give her an ultimatum like ‘date me or go away’. What if she chose to go away? That’s suicide right there.

 

I want to curse so bad because I’m.so.whipped.  

I sit down and start to stir my coffee.

 

“So.......” I look up at her and she fidgets a little before continuing, “I owe you an apology, Fany-ah.”

 

That’s not what I expected. I raise my eyebrows and my face must’ve shown my confusion clearly because she starts to explain, “I shouldn’t invite Yoona for lunch. It’s.... um... how do I say this? Umm.... well I’d like to think that lunch is...... exclusive for the two of us. And we haven’t seen each other for a week. I meant it when I said I really want to see you, but then, this morning I saw Yoona with red eyes and very sad look on her face. She’s the happy-go-lucky kind of girl, so I knew she’s having big problem this morning when I saw her like that. When lunch time came, she still looked so sad that I didn’t have the heart to let her eat alone.” She finishes her explanation and if my mind doesn’t play a trick on me, I’ll say she’s nervous right now, “So, I’m sorry, Fany-ah. I should’ve asked you first if it’s okay if someone else join our lunch.”

 

I’m flabbergasted. She thinks that lunch is exclusive for the two of us! Nonetheless, I don’t know what to say now. Should I say that I forgive her? But that means I am mad at her for inviting someone else to lunch and I don’t want to admit that yet. Not when we’re still just friends.

 

She starts to speak again when I don’t give her any response, “I also need to set something straight. Yoona is just my secretary and also a good friend. Nothing more.”

 

Okay, I definitely feel shy now. I need to keep my cool though, “It’s okay, Taeyeon-ah. Umm... you don’t even need to apologize actually. But thank you for the explanation.” I finish it off with a smile.

 

She smiles back and looks relieved. Suddenly her cellphone that’s on the table rings. She looks at it, “Crap, it’s my boss. I’m sorry again, Fany-ah, I have to take this.”

“It’s okay, go ahead.”      

“Hello? No, I haven’t gone home, Ma’am. Just taking a break for coffee.” She looks at me again with apologetic eyes, “Yes, I’ll be back at the office right away, Ma’am.”

 

What? She’s going back to the office?! I thought we could finally have some time together.

 

She hangs up her cellphone.

 

“You’re going back to the office?”

 

She nods solemnly, “It’s hectic at the moment. I have to finish up on Hong Kong report whilst preparing for Japan.”

“Oh.”

“I snuck away to meet you actually.” She grins and voila! There goes again my blushing face.

 

“So are we okay? You’re not mad at me?” she asks and reaches out her hand across the table to get closer to mine.

I move my hand so that our fingers are touching, “No.”

She breaks out into another wide smile, “Whew!”

I laugh at her reaction and she finally holds my hand.

 

“Now about that jealousy thing.” She smiles teasingly and now I’m really embarrassed.

 

But saved by the ringing cellphone! Her cellphone’s rings again and she heaves a sigh when she looks at who’s calling.

 

“Your boss again?”

“Yeah.” She retracts her hand, “I need to go now. I’m sorry, Fany-ah.”

 

Although I’m disappointed I can’t spend time with her, I don’t want her to get scolded by her boss because of me.

 

“It’s okay, Taeyeon-ah. Stop apologizing.” I give her my best smile and she smiles back.

 

“Thanks, Fany-ah. Be careful on your way home, okay?” she takes her coffee cup and (still ringing) cellphone while standing up.

 

“Okay. I’m going to finish my coffee first though.”

“Oh.” She stands beside me looking somewhat unsure. I’m about to ask her why when she swoops down and kisses my cheek.

 

My body freezes, my eyes widen, and she straightens up, waves while saying ‘Bye’.

 

I manage to mumble what I thought a ‘Bye’ back and see her walking out from the coffee shop.