Mirai POV

3 days have past, life was back to the ordinary. It seemed as though nothing much changed ever since. Well, nothing was supposed to change between me and Ryosuke anyway, however, between me and Hiro, nothing is left to be changed. I did send a message to meet up to explain myself but there was no reply. That's probably his feelings when i did not reply him the last time. He was a good friend, and i failed to treasure that friendship. I took it for granted, or was i simply too obsessed with managing my feelings for Ryosuke that I have lost track of the other valuable things in my life. 

I looked out of the window in class and dazed at the blue sky with occasional birds fluttering past. The field was quiet as the school prepares for the year-end examinations for the other students, now that graduation season is over. My head leaned on my hand as I lethargically pen down notes on my book. Nothing was going into my brain of course. 

Umika's class was out for their laboratory practical examination, leaving me alone after school if it's not for Chinen's call. He wanted to ask me for a favour but won't divulge more until i reached our meeting place.

"Here~" Chinen hollered to me when he saw me hovering around the door and the same cafe. He has ordered a cup of ice lemon tea and a deluxe sandwich, and i knew that favour wont be simple.

"What's up?" She asked.

"I need your help to pass this bag of stuff to Hiro."

"Me? Can't you just pass it to him?"

"I am preparing for my entrance examination for university, and Umika is busy with working on her drama club camp itinerary recently, so she cant make it too."

"I'm sorry. I can help any favour but definitely not this. He hates me."

"I dont know what makes you say that? But anyone can tell that he likes you."

"Are you kidding?! Why would he like me. I am just plain ordinary. He wont."

"You didnt notice because you are still crushing on Ryosuke. You didnt notice Hiro's gentle gestures towards you."

"He is just kind."

"Not the way umika and i saw it. He definitely likes you."

"Umika said so too?!"

"We both noticed the way he cares for you. It's not overt, but his little actions were all out of love" chinen's explanation triggered some recollection of the day he comforted her after the confrontation with the girls. While in a daze, Chinen added, "i still insist you stop liking Ryosuke. even though he is single now, but it wouldnt be long before he finds his next target. He is a heartbreaker, so dont get your fingers burnt over him. Im saying this because i could tell the 2 of you getting closer. I am most surprised that he celebrated his birthday with you. He never celebrated with anyone else for a long time."

"How... How did you find out?"

"It's disneyland. There's bound to be people who saw you and him."

"Mizuo knows too..." I imagined since her brother already knew of it. 

"I dont know if she knows but she'll eventually. Heard she's very upset over the breakup and by her nature of not conceding defeat, she wont just give him up. So Dont get embroiled into their couple tiff. Hiro is a much better choice. He'll treasure you"

I kept silence as i remembered how angry he was that night, and it all made sense now, though i am still pretty much unconvinced. A perfect guy wouldnt fall for me. "Can we just change topic? Lets talk about you. How are things?"

"i'll be busy with the entrance examination for tokyo university."

"Envy..."

"You can too. I'll see you as school mate next year." Chinen said positively.

"It must be busy to find time to meet Umika?" 

"To hang out outside is hard, but we go each other's house so that we can still work on our individual stuff. Killing 2 birds with one stone, ne. Fortunately, Umika isnt like other girls who are really demanding. Those of Ryosuke's really give me the phobia. Speaking of him, i havent had a proper meal with him for a while. Trying to ask him out for his favourite yakiniku, to secretly celebrate his birthday, but he's uncontactable. Are you in contact with him?"

"No. Since his birthday..." I became curious too and especially so when Chinen made a wild guess, "perhaps he's busy with job search. This dude has jobs looking for him even before graduation, a reputable modelling firm, yet he turned down to seek the job of a salaryman. He really have no idea the employment rate."

"He turned down?! Why?" I was shocked by what Chinen has said

"I would like to ask him too. I heard from Mizuo that The contract they are offering him is 1 billion yen. The classmates i have who scored nearly perfect scores havent even secured a job and there he is rejecting one. Though i heard somehow that Mizuo helped pull some strings, it could be why he turned it down. His dignity is too high"

Mizuo is able to do something as great as that for him, thats the benefit of being popular. Me, i cant do much, so i should not even dare hope he accept me. I cant even convince myself of my worth. I only mess up his life like the almost-screwed-up birthday. 

"Anyway, are things alright for you in school? Sorry, i heard some girls confronted you quite sometime back. What was it about?" He was concerned. I thought no one else would learn of it, obviously, i was wrong. He found out after all. It must be the juniors at the drama club that day, who witnessed it.

"It's the usual stuff. Im okay, dont worry," i shrug it off, hoping he doesnt probe further and finds out it's about my relationship with himself, hiro and the one he is persuading me to give up all this while, Ryosuke. If i tell it all, it's gonna prove his point greater that trouble will follow.
 
"Sorry, i wasnt there when you needed help. Next time, call me. I'll rush there immediately." I gave him a nod, his words surely tugged me heartstrings. However, right after, he pushed the bag of items to me once again, stood up and gestured to leave.

"Oi Chinen!"

He cheekily exclaimed, "meet Hiro for me. Im giving you a chance to patch things up with him. Go for it, Mirai. Gambatte!"

"Chinen!" I shouted for him to come back but he ran so fast, he disappeared in a blink of an eye. I stomped my feet in frustration. I have no choice but to do what he instructed, regardless how unwilling i was. I carried the bag over my shoulders and walked in the cold, slouching. I followed the directions on the map based on the address Chinen gave, and land myself outside a tall building that emitted quite a strong feeling of star power. I hesitated before entering, especially avoiding the eyes of the more famous people who i crossed paths with. From what i know, hiro is a freelance actor and model, managed by this company, kei artiste management. He gets to decide on the projects, and that seemed to resonate well with his character of free-choice and reasoning.

Can it be i looked too out of place, cause the receptionist walked right towards the confused me who wandered in the lobby. "Who are you looking for, miss? We do not allow unauthorised personnel entry unless you made an appointment."

"Im looking for Suzuki Hiro, and sorry i dont have an appointment."

"Then im sorry, miss. I cant allow entry."

"Can you pass a message to him? Please..."

She looked reluctant, and her eyes obviously judging me as a desperate fangirl. I did sound like one, since i did not position my words persuasively. Too late, i can only hope she help me out. 

"Okay. I'll see what i can do." 

I quickly grabbed a pen and paper from my back and wrote down my message quickly before she changed her mind about helping. "Hiro-kun. I've got something for you, from Chinen. More importantly, i hope you could see me, for a minute. Please. I'll wait for you until you are free to meet." I signed off my name, folded it, and passed it to the receptionist who looked at me with raised brows. 

"How are you related to Suzuki Hiro-san?"

"His friend" 

"(Thats what i thought. It cant be anything more)" she mumbled loud enough for me to hear. She was rude but thats how the entertainment industry is, hostile, exclusive and judgmental. She assimilated very well. I was clearly from the other extreme. I thanked her nonetheless as she headed up to pass the note. I am nervous, genuinely am. Would he meet me? This question repeatedly pounded on my head, making it impossible to breathe regularly. The wait turned out to be longer than i imagined, the receptionist did not come back until almost 15 minutes later. Her face was in frowns, very much angsty. My anxiety rise further. 

"He's not free. If there's anything you want to pass to him, i'll pass it on your behalf," she gestured for the item, but i did not agree. "I'll wait for him," i responded. She said with annoyance, "whatever you want, but please wait outside the building." There was no compassion in her words. Before she would suggest having the security drag me out, i should promptly leave the vicinity. As the door swing open to the outside, i could already feel the long wait in the cold. I simply regretted not bringing my sweater along. How good would it be if i have a cup of hot coffee right now. But, i dared not leave even for a second in case he popped by. 

The wait turned hours. I could not feel myself, almost on the verge of hypothermia. With chattering teeth, frozen limbs, i began to hallucinate.. Or was I? A tall figure stood in front of me where i sat. The person did not say a word. I rubbed my eyes and saw Hiro's stern face. It was inappropriate for me to be star struck but Hiro who is donned in a turtle neck white top and a suit was especially captivating. 

"What is it that you have to pass to me personally? You could just hand it to receptionist." He said coldly. I had a whole lot of things to say to him, but when he stood in front of me, i couldnt say a word. I barely stretched out my hand to pass him the bag. He took it and had a look of it. Realising what it was, he answered back, "you shouldnt have waited so long just to pass me this... Thanks, Mirai. I am going back, and you should go off too," he said. Regardless of his change in attitude towards me after that night, he is still polite and considerate nonetheless. But the noticeable changes make my heart sour. Before he walked off, i called out, "wait Hiro, can we talk. I need to explain."

"There's nothing to explain cause there's no misunderstandings anyway." He said.

"If so, then are we not friends anymore?"

"It's up to you. Im tied up with work right now. Sorry," he paced off without even facing me. I frankly was pessimistic about hearing from him anymore, since he did not end off with his usual upbeat tone which signals a possible meetup. There wasnt Even a simple 'see you' or 'call you later'. It was almost like he didnt care at all, but i was hoping he did. To put it crudely, he has completely lost faith in the friendship. Oddly, it impacted me so greatly, i couldnt focus on my journey back. I was in a complete daze as I walked aimlessly.

*buzz buzz.

I was disrupted by the vibration of her phone. I lethargically held it up, and picked up the phone without bothering much. "Yes?" I answered without any greetings too. In the first place, i dont normally receive much calls, so come to think of it, i often lost track of my phone ethics. However, the other person on the line didnt seem to know either.

"are you free?" A man's voice channeled through the device. It was familiar. So familiar. I quickly took a second look at my caller ID, and i almost dropped my phone in the shock im in. 

"Ryosuke?.. Is that you?"

"Is it that surprising," he sounded like my reaction was a joke, and i felt i needed to explain before he thinks of me weirdly. It's not that im not already weird enough. 

"No no. It's because Chinen just told me he hasnt been able to contact you in the past few days too. So i didnt expect to hear from you..."

"So, are you free?" He repeated his initial question. I could hear impatience in his cold tone, and thought something must have happened to cause such reaction. I responded, "yes," readily. I couldnt bring myself to say no to him even though he was demanding and was obviously exploiting my infatuation to him for his needs. Yes, at times i do feel this way, especially today. 

"I'll see you at tokyo station." He said then hung up the call before i could ask him about the plans. Why tokyo station? I made my way there, still trembling from being in the cold. I folded my arms to trap the warmth then as i walked past the stores along tokyo station, i saw my pale reflection. I sighed as i saw how he could never be interested in such a poor maintained girl. Above all, is my weak physique... Only barely 3 hours outdoor, i am feeling nausea, cold and dizzy. I leaned against a pillar at the platform, stood still facing the passing train, my mind totally blanked. I wondered how empty my brain can be. Not even when a guy in business suit stood abnormally close beside me. It was for a while until the train arrived. The guy grabbed my arm and pulled me in. Kidnapper? I gasped, but that firm grip was familiar. When we sat down, he released my arm and only then i could take a better look at the suited man.

"Ryosuke?!" I was so shocked that this shock was trapped within me and wasnt verbally expressed. I dont know what was more shocking, him suited up, or his mere presence beside me.

"You were in a daze," he said emotionlessly. I sighed as i probably humiliated myself there and then. Again. The sigh turned into another round of speechless petrification when a layer of warmth wraps around me and kept me cozy. I looked down and saw him pulling his blazer over me. Still he was wearing a stern face, despite his gentle gesture.

"Thank you." I said shyly as i became engulfed by a strong scent of perfume that was seductively enticing. 

"It's getting cold. You should wear more" his words were kind but his deep-knotted brows showed distress.

"Where did you go before this?" I asked, apparently intrusive, so of course the immediate response from a guy who dislikes personal questions was a direct "why?"

Why - i dont know, but i have a feeling its probably the reason why he looks depressed. I dont know how to answer him, luckily he wasnt expecting an answer.

"I had an interview at central bank."

"How was it?" Am i asking the obvious, cause his apparent mood swing could be due to a flop in his interview.

"They offered me a position in the marketing and public relations department." It's definitely a cause for celebrations. Ironically, he is not smiling in joy. 

"Is there something wrong?" I asked, then immediately, he pressed his finger against his lips, "shh", so i did. "We'll sit to the last stop and back" he added, then he slipped back into a depressing silence. His eyes cold as ice, his expression is close to none. I have no idea what happened nor dare to attempt another probe, cause it was obvious he wanted to say no more. I peeked at him, once, twice, few times in a minute, guessing and unguessing what is wrong with him. I noticed his eyes were close, not sure since when, so i got the courage to observe him directly. With arms were folded, and that mere gesture got the area around his neck and the exposed chest beneath his white collar much more irresistible. I gulped as i got attracted to the moles on his neck and subsequently his slow breathing. I recalled the very touch of his skin that fateful night i probably cant forget in my life. My hand uncontrollably stretched out, approaching his shoulders, then i traced the corners of his face, in midair. He couldnt have noticed my actions with his eyes closed, or is it he got a sixth sense?! He suddenly laid his head on my shoulders. 

"Ryosuke?"

I said softly with a gasp, but he ignored and continued his rest. I got a better look of him, and noticed his tired face. That face, is so familiar to that time he was deeply hurt by his birth mother. that depressed face breaks her heart. She lightly brushed his hair with her fingers entwined within those straight dark brown strands. I didnt dare move cause i didnt want to wake him up. My body was very much stiff. Anything is worth it when i saw his deep knotted brows untangle after awhile. It was night time when we took the return trip. The train was jam packed with salarymen. There wasnt really any extra space, especially between us. I was trying so hard not to lose my balance in the moving train, cause it would be especially clumsy to fall over strangers. I gritted my jaw tightly and held my breathe whenever the train makes a turn. I am not always lucky though. I lost my balance finally, and i could really be lying on a beer reeking man behind me if it's not for a pair of arms that circled my waist. "Thank you," i said with heat rushing up my face. I thought i should wriggle myself out of his arms for fear of being addicted to the feeling and become delusional. I also didnt wanna make him uncomfortable with the accidental skinship, but his grip remained tight. I gave him a confused look. Despite the long nap, he still appeared solemn and silent. He didnt give me additional attention, except held me close to him. Why is he making me confused everytime, on top of that, heart seizures without fail. I gave in, my hand gradually crept up to him, and clinged onto his torso. I felt safe and secured. That overwhelming sensation of that night rushed back to me. I couldnt stop my thoughts, and so i forgotten in that hour how to breathe.

Later that night, we walked from the station home. It was then i couldnt suppress my curiosity no more. It's really now or never. "Can you tell me now? Whatever is bothering you?"

Did i sound rude? I got worried when he didnt reply immediately, instead he stopped on his feet in front of me. I waited and my adrenaline rushed in hopes of an answer.

Unexpectedly, he turned around with a wide sunshine smile, "nothing! Im so happy i actually passed the interview with my bare minimum results. I couldnt recover from the shock"

I felt a sense of relieve when i returned him a smile. However, there was this unsettling  feeling i gather from his smile. It kept me thinking even after we separated ways. In a day we spent together, he spoke nothing, but he conveyed all uneasiness. I for one, was convinced a storm is approaching.

It became apparent when the sun rises the next day. I received a urgent call when i was on my way to school.

"Mirai, where are you?!" Umika exclaimed. She sounded hysteric amid her breathlessness.

"On my way. Why? You're panting so badly. Did something happen?"

"Yes! Something horrible! It's about Ryosuke!"

"Huh?" In my mind, i was thinking what can happen to him that could still implicate the school. My heart was pounding loud and fast while i waited for Umika to catch her breathe.

"I dont know how to say it. Come to school right now, you'll know when you see it for yourself" 

My heart paused as one possibility streamed into my mind. Could my forbidden affair that night got exposed?! I cannot afford to get expelled, more importantly i cannot implicate him or put him to shame publicly by my own unruly request which he agreed. I ran for the school while forgetting my unusual morning sickness, forgetting my empty stomach. At the gate, it all seemed calm, through it, i saw the more than usual clutter of students crowding out the notice boards in each classrooms. The chatter was deafening but it was muffled to be able to decipher. I wasnt able to see exactly what the commotion in each class was, all i saw were flyers with printed words cut individually then reassembled together, very similar to those anonymous mailers sent by kidnappers. 

I continued to rush to Umika's class. when i saw her, i hollered her name. She rushed out with her face pale. It added to my anxiety. Her freezing hand touched mine and handed me one of the flyer. I took a close look at it and the crude words stared at me, "yamada ryosuke has filthy blood. He is a son of a e". To top it up, there are horrendous discussions whether he is a hiv carrier. I could have feared for myself, just like how his former girlfriends have cluttered in disgust. A little heartening was that there was no sign of Mizuo amongst the chatter.

"Mirai, who put these nasty fliers. It's all over school. Is it true?" Umika asked worriedly while verifying. It wouldnt be right for me to explain to Umika even if she's my best friend cause up till now, he trusted these information to me in good faith. I shouldnt be the one verifying or commenting in any way. But seeing the same heartbreak in Umika's eyes, i knew we were both genuinely concerned for he is our friend. Well, at least we thought of he is our friend, notwithstanding the secret entanglement between me and him. 

Anyway, i shook my head, then out of a burning urge, i said urgently, "i... There's something i need to attend to..." I ran off before she could ask me anymore. I could briefly hear her hollering my name and running after me, but i managed to shake her off. I ran to where I thought the likely place he would be - the library.

It was dead silence. Every corner of the library, i saw no traces of him. I exited the library in disappointment. As i turned away from the library, i saw flyers stuck to the walls along the corridor. I tore them away one by one, but there were simply too many to be removed. Knowing the cruel side of reality too well, i was certain such bad news will not be contained within the school compounds, it will spread like wildfire over mandatory coffee conversations, neighbourhood talk and all. I was worried for him at the mere thought of it. There, i forgotten another horror, and that is the school will not let him tarnish its name. So i heard the discipline master or perhaps all the teachers phoning whoever who could summon him to school, i was sure Chinen was one of them. However, having learnt of Ryosuke's habits, he wouldnt even let his closest friend get to his heart, so there will be no way of reaching to him. No known way does not mean impossible. I was determined to locate him. I dashed out of school, to the shinjuku district, in particular kabuki street. 

"Excuse me..." I asked hastily to a lady who was about to walk into the same department as Ryosuke's mother. I have not yet told her who i was looking for, she already knew who i wanted to find, "if you are looking for Umi, forget it. I want to find her too and skin her alive if i did. She fled overnight after the money lenders came to chase her for the debts. She owe so much money, it's impossible for her to pay back in her lifetime, yet she so confidently tell me someone will pay it for her. Cant believe she really was serious. That young man is quite pitiful to be scammed"

"Young man?"  I feared at the first hearing of someone that fit the description. 

"Yes. A young man, about your age, frankly a very nice-looking one, came to look for Umi after she fled. Of course, i think by then he knew about the debts she passed on to him, and is probably looking to confront her. I wonder how she seduced him"

I was trembling as i mumbled his name. It's him, i was almost 99 percent sure. I didnt wait anymore from her, I ran with all my might to his house, thinking that he will eventually return to his shelter. I hope i hadnt wish for that. What i saw was more than grotesque, much more heartbreaking that the seemingly harmless rumours.

A few guys, with the look of mafias, were cluttered together. 2 of whom restrained the victim with his arms raised on either side of his body, and 2 others throwing punches against his stomach one after another. I did not know how long this has lasted but it was clear that it has been ongoing for a while since the victim was throwing up and was no longer struggling as though leaving it to his fate. I ran up without thinking much, just at about when the attackers flung him onto a wall. He collapsed on to the ground, on his knees, almost in a begging position with only his hands securing his body upright.

"Ryosuke!!! Stop it, you guys are killing him" i shouted to them, not knowing where i got this courage from. I secured him by his arms, and realised he was much weaker than i thought he was by now. I cried when i asked if he is alright, but he only returned subtle nod as acknowledgement before he cringed agonistically in pain. I wanted so bad to comfort him, to take his pain away, then it was i who needs the pain to be taken away. I was the burden. The attackers pulled me away, and it was precisely that moment, he gave me his attention. 

"Let her go! It's none of her business." He exclaimed with a desperate cracking voice. The response was an insultingly clear and dominating tone, "chill man, we arent gonna do anything to her since you have promised to pay up in 3 days and we have given you your due punishment" the apparent leader of the group teased and the rest of the pack laughed mockingly. They released me, and i went right to him clinging onto his arms. Our eyes were fixated at the speaker, even though he looked like he would rather not.

"We will pay you a visit again. Dont try anything funny cause we can hunt you down, and when we do, we will not guarantee we will not touch your girlfriend," the leader touched seductively the corner of my face. I shrugged, but more surprisingly was Ryosuke who brought me closer to him with his arm wrapped around me, despite his physical pain. He gave them a death stare, yet it only tickled them more. The leader smirked and said, "you only have got to blame yourself for having such a rotten mother. All mothers are the greatest in the eyes of their children, and they will do all they can to keep them safe and healthy. Apparently, this does not quite hold true for you, ne" the group laughed mercilessly then marched off. I saw how Ryosuke clenched his fist and grind his jaw so terribly that it felt like if he was not injured, he would have already charged forward. 

I was glad he allowed me to bring him indoors, and when i saw his living room, i knew what had happened. The mafias must have broken into his house and destroyed what was in sight when he was not able to pay. However, the question still lies with what is this debt about. The leader of the pack has revealed bits of information that left me confused, but all these were secondary to his current safety. 

"Come to my house first. It's safer." He had no expression worn on his face, no reaction too. I gathered the courage and held his arms. When i see no resistance from him, i took another step forward and led him towards my house. It is not a very short walk so at the midways mark, i could see him struggling to suppress the pain. He held his stomach with frowns on his face, cringing frequently. I slipped myself beside him and pull his arms over my shoulder and secured him. He still displayed no other emotions on his face, almost like his soul wasnt in his body.

Fortunately, there was no one at home, so i hid him in my room. I helped him settle down on his bed, sat upright against the wall, i asked directly, "what happened?"

He remained silent, so silent i could probably hear a pin drop. His eyes was deadly cold, his fist was clenched as though he could literally swing and punch through the wall. I felt he wasnt keen to explain, i was in guilt for probing. I wanted to excuse myself cause it us becoming increasingly suffocating for me.

".. I will go get my first aid kit," i said fearfully. To my surprise, just before i stepped away, he spoke.

"She went to those illegal money lenders and got herself into a huge dept. she couldnt pay, so she fled. But you know whats more hilarious?"

The word hilarious was confusing. I was almost certain he had not understood the meaning of the word or had used it wrongly cause there's simply no way this incident could be in anyway funny. I patiently listened nonetheless. 

"The accumulative debt is 1 billion yen and she passed it to someone she regard less than a stranger!" He laughed hysterically.

"Ryosuke~" he laughed so hard he pounded on his body. It became clear to me that he was trying to numb that excruciating heartache that burns his cells. His laughter turned into silent cries where tears ran like streams of amazon. The long suppressed sorrows tore him apart and led him to a mental breakdown. The cries broke my heart too, and it was that one side of him that i havent seen, not even close to the slight depression when he first met his mother. No one could have survived this torment from a kin that close,  no one could live after seeing the boy become crippled by the harsh reality that defined his life. I was afraid he would die crying. That was when i saw myself in him, no he was much worst. At least my family is with me, physically, albeit my presence was a bane to them. He had nothing to begin with, and that blood relation becomes a tie of abuse, that birth becomes a result of an unforgivable sin. The knowledge of his origin will no doubt cast a deep ingrained scar in his battered heart and weakens that tough shell he created for himself. What i saw before me, the perfect boy in everyone's eyes whose lies of perfection has been instantly exposed, leaving behind the most vulnerable side of him thats far from perfection. Instead, he is a victim of men's act of selfish, self-centered hedonism. He went into a recluse, despair and isolation. No matter how i tried to make available myself to console the shattered soul, the more i found his self-constructed wall between him and the rest of the world, impenetrable.

Warm tears trickled down my frozen cheeks. I hide those of mine cause they were simply too trivial to shed. I wish i could be here for you, but i just wasnt the one.

If it was the streaming tears that eventually tire him out, testing his body to its limits. He finally fell into a deep sleep. I crawled onto the bed where he had laid his head onto his knees tugged against his chest. I carefully lowered him onto my bed.  I thickened my skin and fearlessly ed his top to nurse the obscene bruises underneath the cover. My fingers gently rubbed where there were stains of blue black, or pure red. This gesture was emotionally demanding as every touch reminds me of his pain; every touch i saw his face cringed even in his sleep. I caught his falling tears from his shut eyes and caressed his face. I know i wasnt the one he would want beside him, yet i felt that was what anyone would want in a time of despair, to hug him and give a healing kiss where the tears have landed and where the head throbbed with nightmare. I lightly gave a peck on his forehead and the corner of his lips, with my arms circled around him, giving a light squeeze. His breathing was hasty, i knew then he was still struggling. I laid my head beside him while sitting on the ground, thinking how he could ever repay that 1 billion yen. He is only gonna face more horror from the mafias. My lids got heavier the more i think, i could not remember when i finally slept. 

*****
Earlier, Umika was alone in the classroom after class, slowly packing up as she has still time to spare before meeting Chinen outside. There was so much to ask him about the whole chaos she witnessed in school today, and that unsettling feeling of Mirai's unexplained truancy from school set her worried. Immensely distracted, she did not noticed there was someone else in the room. Her heart stopped abruptly when she felt a warm touch on her cheeks.   It's the kind of warmth that cuddles, that probably also cause a surge of heat up her face. It's a loving feeling, and at the same time a hateful feeling for not being able to calm down for a long time. She wasnt able to turn to her sides for a while until the other has retreated onto a seat beside her.

"I know what you are thinking. Let me guess... You're worried about Ryosuke, you're curious what happened. i am also feeling lost. I dont know what happened and i'm also desperately looking for him. When you told me about the fliers, i had a shock. For some reason, i think he already knew about his mother and that explains why he has stopped looking for her and spoke nothing of her to me. He'll get really furious if i probe any further. So whatever that you saw on the flier isnt exactly unbelievable"

"Will he be okay?" Umika looked deeply into Chinen's eyes and asked.

"I dont think he will be okay for awhile. His dignity is like the most important thing for him and whoever who spread this has the intention to strike his weakness and cripple him. This has already spread into the neighbourhood and no doubt he will face societal discrimination. Having said that, he is tough and witty, so i know he will not let himself be defeated. We have to give him some time alone."

"Hope so." Umika sighed. They both felt immensely helpless as the only thing they could do is to wait. Then Umika remembered something else that was bothering her.

"I cant contact mirai. She ran off when she saw the fliers, and apparently she never return to school."

"Really?! Just a wild guess, she probably went to look for Ryosuke"

Umika noticed Chinen sighed and was curious why, so he explained. " she is still not giving up on him. I really think she's better off liking someone else. Ryosuke isnt good for her."

"He is your friend"

"So... Mirai is my friend too. Precisely because they are my friends, i dont want them to get hurt."

"But..."

"Lets not argue over this. Wanna visit Tokyo University?"

"Me?"

"Yes. Lets go" he took her hand and they made their way to the destination that will make all certainties turn uncertain again. Umika did not know what she would expect and least knew that what she is about to encounter would raise her anxiety. 

The gate that opens to one of the most reputable university presents itself right before her eyes. Standing beside Chinen, she felt he appeared so much in sync with the students on the other side. They were dressed freely and attractively, yet decent. More importantly, they all appeared matured and sensible. Chinen fits right in. He led her into the school, touring the corners of his soon-to-be campus. from the classroom, leisure rooms, auditoriums, seminar rooms, each were well-equipped with technologies that enhanced their robust tertiary education experience. She couldnt close from the excitement of the modern campus. Chinen smiled in contentment when he noticed her girlfriend's look of approval of his future school. He wanted her to be proud of him, to be happy for him, and he could see that all on her face. There was no words, but deep entanglement of their fingers entwined together as they paced around the school. After they toured the interiors, they took a slow walk around the perimeters of the school that embraced the scenic nature.

"Umika, would you wanna join me here when you graduate from high school?"

"That goes without saying if i have the capability. I'll work hard and that will be my goal for the next one year"

"Then i cant wait already" chinen smiled widely while giving a light squeeze of her hand. He stopped and turned to her, looking deeply at her.

"Is there something wrong?" She wondered. Then he leaned closer and closer, so she instinctively closed her eyes and waited for that moment. That wait turn longer than she thought, and she initially thought she was simply too impatient for it. Her heartbeat furiously for something to tinkle on her lips. But all she heard was his giggles. She opened her eyes and saw him laughing at her, so she gave chase when she realised he was teasing her.

"Chinen Yuri, is that you?" She stopped chasing when she saw a girl about her size right in front of Chinen. She has a pair of beady eyes, almost sparkling and has a rosy complexion. Dressed elegantly in a dress, she is clearly another man's killer. Umika felt a wave of insecurity and threat. She had the urge to step forward and claim possession, but held back as she felt that strong inertia from within.

"Ah, Ohgo Suzuka. It has been a long time." He greeted back with the same enthusiasm.

"How are things for you and Ryosuke? I saw him on magazines so i assume he's doing great. As hot as always, or even more.. Im more curious about you,Chinen"

"I am great too. I am enrolled into this school"

"Oh my gosh! Congratulations! We're gonna be school mates again Chinen!" They both jumped with joy with hands holding onto each other. umika convinced herself that it was simply out of mutual feelings of overwhelming excitement. However, the mere thought of the duo studying within the campus, within the shared future without her, makes it hard for her not to fear. That fear gradually turned to frustration, and it became impossible to dissipate, especially when she was not on his list of agenda.

"Bye Chinen! I'll call you and we can catch up again, with Ryosuke"

"Bye Suzuka!"

They bidded farewell, temporarily, unfortunately. Umika would have suppressed all her uneasiness if she had not imagined Chinen's lingering reluctance to part from Suzuka's presence. So when he finally returned to Umika's side, she couldnt hide her unhappiness.

"Why?" He was surprised when Umika shrug his hand away. He saw the fuming face of Umika and replied with more annoyance in her voice, "what is it again?"

"You didnt introduce me at all"

"Oh, it's about this. There's always the next time, ne. Come, lets go for lunch first, i am famished" he tried to take her hand again, however she did not allow it.

"Next time when you meet privately with her? Without me in the way, conversations can be more free right?" Umika lost her temper at him, one of the rare times that she has the courage to, given her timid character. She always hope she was more brave than Mirai, more independent than mirai. this time, it was unexpected. "I am not hungry. You can eat all you want." She gave a fierce push of his chest and stomped off, leaving Chinen in shock.

"FINE! WHATEVER YOU WANT!" chinen shouted back but quickly fell into a mix of doubt and annoyance. It happened too frequently and it has become occasionally a painpoint that stirs feelings of regret. Perhaps it all happened too fast. At such times, chinen hoped he could discuss with Ryosuke, the problems he faced at love, but his phone was shut off. Chinen remembers his best friend is in a midst of a crisis himself which he could not offer help to as well. 

He sends a message, "hey ryo, i know you're having a difficult time. If you need me, i am always here for you. Give me a call okay.

From your best friend"

*****

The night was long and in the breaking of the storm, one could really feel insecured. However, when all seems bleak, there seems a blanket that shelters from the pricking rain and deafening thunder that threatens to tear one apart. Ryosuke pries open his swollen eyes, with his body aching from the aftermath. With the only thin stream of light illuminating the dark room, he found the solace in the familiar environment that once kept him safe. That familiar little head propped beside him, sleeping uncomfortably. Dejavu to rightfully put it. It seemed like it was just yesterday that they experienced the same sequence, entangled in almost the same situation, and feeling the same guilt for troubling her. He remembered the mess from the crying, feeling awfully ashamed for affecting her. He quietly sat up so that he will not startle her nor alert her family who most likely did not know his presence here. Only then, he realised she has tended to his injuries as his fingers ran across his exposed skin painted with blue-black bruises. Massaging his stiff shoulders, he reached out for his mobile phone with his free hand. He was surprised to see many phone calls, yes there were those from Chinen, and there were those from Mirai, then there was the other girl... He tried to think of other possibilities, but there only seem to be one. It seems the only one that will not implicate another person. He clenched his fist as he suppressed the burning rage and regret. He lifted the exhausted Mirai onto the bed he once occupied, then sat by her bedside with his eyes looking deeply at her and his hand gently her hair. He realised the changes in him, the way he look at her, the way he feels around her has changed. It was almost like that burst of realisation got him repelling from her bed and turned his back against her. Taking his belongings and donning back his top, he walked right to the door which sealed them together in the same confined space. he turned the knob with all his energy, fighting his inertia to finally turn around and look at her in the way she will never get to see. He murmured under his breathe with a heart full of remorse, "I'm sorry, Mirai." 

He sneaked out of her house successfully. He brushed away a drop of tear that helplessly escaped from the corner of his eyes and took one last glance of where her room was, with the image of her sleep captured vividly in his mind. He set his mind and buried all those distractions, taking up his mobile and dialled the number he thought he would never be initiating. "Lets meet," he said into the phone as soon as it becomes engaged. 

****

Please enjoy the chapter as always:) even a simple comment from you would be great. Also, i have done up a short fanmade mv of this fanfic. Would need some imagination from you cause i have simply extracted parts of various clips and it may not be entirely in sync. Ignore the subtitles especially since i cant remove it from their respective clips. http://youtu.be/inPBGPedaxQ