TEN

Opening the door to the school pool, Jinwoo take his clothes off, leaving his small body with just his trunks. He slowly put his feet in the water, his whole body shiver from the cold air and water. He turn around, heels at the edge, dropping his body at the water with a big flash of water slapping his back. Jinwoo just let his body goes deeper and deeper until he feels the pool tiles. He opens his eyes and feels a stinging pain from the chlorine, swimming his way up, he let his body floats. He let his body feel the cold water, closing his eyes as the happy memories of them together comes back and he can’t help but chuckle bitterly. Those happy moments they shared, the laughter’s, midnight calls, Seunghoon cheesy line that he learn to love, Seunghoon touch that he’s longing for, Seunghoon smile that he used to see everytime they meet. All of them were gone; Seunghoon doesn’t even spare him a glance no matter how he called the latter.

Jinwoo feels some movement around him but he just ignores it and let his body float at the end of the pool.

“Hyung you’ll catch a cold again. Come on.”  A deep husky voice breaks the silence and Jinwoo opens his eyes, glancing at the tall man with his hand stretch for him. Jinwoo doesn’t take it instead he closes his eyes again and just swims away.

Jinwoo waits until Mino leaves before he leaves the pool. Walking his way to his room he met Seunghoon who’s on his way to his and Hongseok room. It’s been two weeks since they last talk, since the night Seunghoon left him.

“Hey.” Jinwoo tries to catch Seunghoon but the latter just walk faster.

“Seunghoon.”  Jinwoo wraps his arms around Seunghoon waist when he finally caught the latter.

“Can we talk?” Seunghoon face him, grabbing the towel from Jinwoo hands, wiping the water that drop from Jinwoo hair to his skin.

“I can ask Taehyun to leave. We can talk to my room or yours if you want.” Jinwo says biting his lips. His heart had been clenching and he doesn’t know if he can keep his composure any longer.

“We can talk here.” Seunghoon glance to him, tossing his towel.

“But-”

“If you don’t want to then.” Seunghoon shrugs, turning around and walking away.

“Wait.” Jinwoo holds his wrist but Seunghoon just slaps his hand away.

“I’m sorry.”

“I’m sorry. I really am. I know no words can change what happen but I just want to let you know that I’m really sorry. I don’t know how to make it up to you. I don’t know if you will forgive me but please give me a chance. Please don’t close your heart for me. Please don’t let this be the end. Please let me love you again. Let me feel your love again. Please call me baby again. Watch me sleep again. Please Seunghoon love me again.”

Jinwoo tears don’t stop falling when Seunghoon drags him to his room, asking Taehyun if he can sleep with Seungyoon. It doesn’t stop when Seunghoon kisses him, when Seunghoon tear his clothes, when Seunghoon touches him, when he felt Seunghoon hands all over his body, when Seunghoon kisses and to him roughly and he cry louder when Seunghoon just left him when he’s done.

Jinwoo doesn’t understand whatever Mr. Choi teaches them.

“Kim Jinwoo.”  A firm deep voice startles him.

“Yes?”

“Is Seunghoon more interesting than my class?” Mr. Choi asks with his eyebrows quirk up. The whole class giggles and Jinwoo face

“No sir.” Looking down Jinwoo caught Mino looking at him sadly.

“As I was saying next week will be your exam so I hope you use all your free time studying not staring.” Mr. Choi looks at Jinwoo at the last words.

“You should be studying not sulking.” Taehyun nudge Jinwoo that’s only staring at the book on his lap. Jinwoo has been on the same page for 30 minutes and releasing a sigh every now and then.

“You’re not mad anymore?” Jinwoo faces Taehyun. It’s the first time Taehyun talks to him and he can’t help but hug his friend. He really needs someone right now.

“You look pathetic hyung. Look at your dark circles, stop thinking about it.”

“Taehyun-ah I want him back.”

“Maybe you need to give him time?”

“But what if he slips away during that time?”

“He loves you hyung I’m sure he will forgive you.”

“But I hurt him.”

“That’s why you need to give him time hyung.”

“How long?”

“We don’t know but maybe after you end everything with Mino. You’ve been ignoring him and he doesn’t know where he stands.”

Jinwoo release Taehyun, biting his lips and fidgeting with his fingers. He doesn’t really know what he really feels for Mino and he can’t just end everything after what happen.

“Don’t tell me you can’t.”

“I just don’t know how.”

“Just focus on your exam first hyung. Let’s think about it together.”

They start studying again but Jinwoo minds still lingers between Mino and Seunghoon and he found himself getting lost again.

It’s Sunday, the day before Monday and the day before their exam. Jinwoo spends all his time studying alone but his minds is busy studying other things and he knows he’s doom tomorrow. His phone rings and when he saw the caller he got the urge to just rejects it but he’s been ignoring his brother.

“Hello.”

“Hi Kim Jinwoo! Finally you answer my call. Why are you ignoring your brother?”

“I’m not I’m just busy.” Jinwoo groans he doesn’t really need his brother to annoy him today.

“Busy my . Where’s Seunghoon?” it’s another reason why he ignores his brother. He likes Seunghoon a lot and he knows he will be dead the second his brother knows what he had done.

“He’s busy studying.” It’s not actually a lie, knowing Seunghoon he’s probably studying right now.

“You’re not studying together?” His brother knows them too well. He knows that the two of them love studying together.

“No?”

“Why?”

“A little fight I think?” Jinwoo wishes his hyung just stop asking question he can’t answer.

“I want to talk to him.”

“Then why don’t you just call him.”

“Can you just find him for me?” and Jinwoo knows better than to irritate his brother so he walks out of his room, searching for the man who doesn’t want to be found.

He saw Seunghoon outside, sitting with his friends.

“Hey.” Jinwoo doesn’t know how to approach him. This is the first time he will talk to Seunghoon after that night and he’s heart still hurts seeing him.

“Why hyung?” Bobby asks, at least Bobby still talks to him like nothing happens.

“Sunggyu hyung.” Jinwoo gestures his phone to Seunghoon who takes it and walks away from them.

Seunghoon and his brother take their time talking and Jinwoo actually making up scenario inside his head in case Seunghoon tells the truth to his brother. When Seunghoon gives him his phone back his brother is still on the line.

“Hyung.”

“So you broke up?” Jinwoo looks at Seunghoon who stop laughing when he meets Jinwoo eyes.

“Yes.” Jinwoo voice cracks and he feels like crying again when Seunghoon smiles at him like nothing is wrong.

“You don’t have plan on telling me why?” Jinwoo walks away from the group. Seunghoon is ready to let him go. He looks so happy even without him and he’s been dying all along while Seunghoon was actually moving on from him.

“I cheated on him.” Jinwoo mutters and he let everything go, telling his brother everything that he did, telling him how horrible his brother is and his brother listens. Listen to him with and open ear and heart.