Tao was walking his way to school from the students’ dorm when someone patted his shoulder.

 

 

“Morning,” Kris greeted with a smile.

 

 

“Morning,” he greeted back and his cheeks turned into a beet shade of red.

 

 

 

The two of them walked together to the school. Every girl was turning into their direction as they go. What’s even more charming than two hot guys acting cool together?

 

 

 

Not to mention that both had genuine smiles plastered on their faces.

 

 

 

Luhan saw this and smiled to himself.

 

 

 

Well, someone looks happy today.

 

 

 

**

 

 

 

Luhan and Kris were called by the new student body president since they’re the ones who just ‘joined’ recently. Kris appeared one month ago, and Luhan, weeks after him.

 

 

 

As they were walking, Luhan couldn’t help but feel a little bit awkward. Kris and he became close after the secret-telling incident, but after seeing Tao’s emotions once again, everything just changed for Luhan.

 

 

 

“Yah, Kris-ge.”

 

 

“I’m sorry what?” Kris pulled out the left side of his earphones to listen to his friend.

 

 

“How are you?” Luhan asked.

 

 

Kris’s beautiful eyebrow arched. “I’m fine, I guess. You’re weird,” he said and just continued listening to the song he was playing. Luhan just laughed at his remark.

 

 

 

Mr. Kim Kibum just gave them the student handbook and immediately left for the tasks he was supposed to do. Since there is still time, and Luhan wanted to talk to Kris, they both went to the rooftop.

 

 

 

“Someone looks happy this morning,” Luhan teased.

 

 

Kris felt nothing at first, but after realizing what his friend meant, he immediately smiled. “Yes, indeed. You know what, I’m happy that we’re staying like this, I mean Tao and I. It feels…spectacular, just like before.” Luhan smiled as his friend recited the words with a sincere smile formed by his lips. He just loves him so much, don’t you think?

 

 

“Don’t you want to tell him? I think that’s more normal,” Luhan suggested.

 

 

“I want to. But don’t you remember what he said? He hates me.” A sad smile replaced the previous one Kris had on his face.

 

 

“But I think if you explained it to him, he might—“

 

 

“No. Tao is not that easy to persuade before.” Before, Luhan thought.

 

 

“But it’s different now, right?” Luhan is really trying to persuade his friend because he wanted his friends to become okay.

 

 

“Luhan, stop,” Kris said and stayed silent.

 

 

 

Suddenly the two men heard the door creak open.

 

 

 

 

And they couldn’t be more surprised.

 

 

 

“Tao…”

 

 

 

The younger one remained silent with his eyes wide and looking with disbelief.  He was looking for the both of them since it took a little too long for their meeting with the new president, and he found himself on the way to the rooftop. This is what I get for eavesdropping.

 

 

 

“All this time…you…” He couldn’t find the right words to say.

 

 

 

Kris stood up from his place and went closer to Tao. But as he got closer, Tao instinctively backed away. Kris tried to at least pat his shoulder, but it was useless.

 

 

 

“Don’t touch me…” Tao looked at him straight in the eyes.

 

 

“Why…why didn’t you tell me?” His tears are now forming. Mixed emotions rushed over him: anger, pain, betrayal…

 

 

“I…Tao….” Kris looked at his feet and then at Tao’s face.

 

 

“I’m sorry…” was all Kris could say. He looked away and when he looked at his lover’s face, he saw tears coming out. No…

 

 

Tao sniffed. “How can you do this to me? I thought…I thought you love—“

 

 

“I do, Zitao. I really do.”

 

 

 

Tao’s tears flowed more it can form a river. “I do, too, Yifan.” Kris, being touched by his lover’s act, pulled him into a hug. I really love you.

 

 

 

“God knows how much I missed you…” Kris whispered into his ear and brushed his hair soothingly.

 

 

“Me too. I’ve been longing for you. I got mad at you after you killed yourself because you could’ve lived more happily, even without me.”

 

 

“It’s my choice, okay? No need to be mad, panda.” Tao let go of the hug and smiled sincerely at Kris as he called his old nickname. It felt just like the old times.

 

 

“So…why didn’t you tell me, huh?” Tao asked curiously, hoping to get an answer this time.

 

 

 

And he did get an answer.

 

 

 

Kris is slowly becoming transparent, and a light shone upon him.

 

 

 

“No...No...” Tao whispered to himself as Kris was transforming. “Yifan. Yifan, don’t leave me...”

 

 

“You are my happiness, Huang Zitao. Always have, always will. And before anything else, I just wanted to say that…I love you with all my heart.”

 

 

 

And Kris vanished into thin air.

 

 

 

“I love you too.” Tao cried and cried and cried. Now he knew how it felt. How Suho felt when Lay was gone.

 

 

“Tao...” Luhan approached him. He almost forgot that Luhan was also here. Luhan was about to hug him when Tao did it first.

 

 

 

Tao gripped tightly on Luhan’s shirt and cried. His cry was quiet. He was sobbing. He wasn’t shouting or saying anything. He was just crying like a baby to his mom. Luhan felt like crying after seeing Tao’s condition. He was afraid that Tao was silent because that meant that Tao was really hurt.

 

 

 

“Tao, I’m sorry...”

 

 

 

Tao just cried and poured his heart out.