(5)
A good in goodbye."Turn right…" the woman in my gps instructed.I immediately make my car turn to the right.
After i read the letter , i rushed myself to the car and drive to Chanyeol's house ,which inna gave the address moments ago.And now i am hanging on my gps to find chanyeol's home.
After my gps said that it is the place , i go down from the car and immediately ring the bell.
His house is big , with many plants in there .The design is minimalist though ,wow he must be so rich to have this-type-of-house ...Is this his house or his family ?
Chanyeol barely told me about his family before .He only said his parent were busy and never had time for him.Also he said he has a noona, his noona is that beautiful , smart and kind type of person …he said she resembles me so much.Only that .
"Anyeonghaseyo" someone with a short hair ,a similar face with chanyeol came out and greet me . Must be his sister, he told me before...
"Anyeonghaseyo, excuse me ....is this park chanyeol house ?" i asked .She is smiling "Yes it is , come in….Park chanyeol is busy preparing his luggage in his room .You must be his friend." she said and then i follow her into the living room .
His house is really nice, the building has a high window made of glass in which makes me think that more than a half of his house is covered by glass,the wall is painted with white and a little bit dark grey here and there then from what i see in his living room.... he doesnt have so many furniture here.The building isn't that big though but the garden is , with all the flowers there i just know it it is not park chanyeol's its his family .Park chanyeol i knew cant do gardening, he is as bad as me .
But back again , 7 years passed .....
He must changed a little bit.
"You can sit here , i will go upstair and ask him to meet you ,okay ?"she said.I only nodded and take a sit on the comfortable couch they provided here.
I see their living room is full of photographs and paintings hanging on the wall.The biggest one in the centre is their family photograph, i can see his appa-eomma sitting together in the centre,chanyeol is on the right standing beside his eomma, his sister is on the left with the supposed to be his sister's husband standing beside his sister,a baby boy sitting on her laps .it must be her child….Then i see another photograph of chanyeol having his first baby step and also her noona graduation photos.At the left side, i could see a big painting of a a giraffe in a savana but the giraffe looks sad.Is that him ? i laughed to myself and on the left i see an abstract painting i couldn't understand,weird taste from park family i guess.
I finally could hear someone is walking down from the upstairs.It must be chanyeol…
"Nana….is that you?" he asked.I turn my head to see him and smile.
"What are you doing here , Nana ?" while walking towards him.I stand up and walking closer to him"Are you okay chanyeol ?" i asked .looking at the bruises beside his mouth ,it must be because of what baekhyun did to him .
"I am!!! i am though you know !" he laughed .How dare he laughs like that ,it is not even funny.
And now, we are not talking to each other , awkward silence.It must be because of yesterday tragedy or the seven years or...... we are just not that close anymore.
"Do you want to look around at our garden ?" he asked break the silence. "Okay ."i answered short .
Then we walk into the park's garden.Their garden is beautiful and big , they have almost everything from a green plant until a colourful flower.They also have tress with a swing hanging under the branch , a bench and a pool full of fish.A heaven on earth for gardener i guess.
We walk in silence , i remember the last time we walk in silence was when he was about to go to America i hate this though …it brings back memories i hate so much.
"Lets just sit here , its my favourite bench ." he said pointing at the bench full of carved words. I can't see the words because its pretty blurry ,but i could see "27.14" i remember its our favourite number before.27 is his birthdate and 14 is mine ..if we minused the birthdate we would get 13 which mystically people always thought of 'Un-lucky number' so we made a change for ourselves and we promised to ourselves that "13 is our lucky number".That we are lucky enough to be together.
"I read the letter ." i said ,to break another silence we made.He only smile."I just read that today …" i added .
"I know…..Inna told me earlier." he said . he blankly look at the garden full of sunflowers,i remember its his favourite flower before. He said sun flower is the best when it is with its friends , sunflower is just the same with a person ..its better with friends.
"Baekhyun……is that his name ?" he asked , his eyes still fixed on the garden. I nodded carefully on him .But,out of my sense , he hold my hand ..i feel a strange feeling lingering in my body "Don't tell me more about him nana,please…i beg you."he said softly .I slowly release my hand from him ,i can't do this even i want to …even i miss him like hell .I still can't do this
"What happened to you ?" i asked him . I manage myself to be calm and not being bluntly ask everything just because i am curious.At least he is back and he is healthy , i don't care if he is not anyway i would still be on his side.I simply just don't want to scare him.
"I am okay , i guess"he answered .
He might tried his best to lie , but i know him more than everyone …He can't lie to me.My mind processing to one day when he lied to me about not bringing cakes for my birthday because he didn't have any money when the reality is the cakeshop were closed everywhere because of national holiday and although i knew what he told me was a lie because i could see him in his eyes…but i remain silent .But for now ? i can't do that anymore.I need to know….
"Lying isn't your speciality ,Park Chanyeol."i said with a laugh , i can see he is laughing too.Because this is what he said before to me at the party...right before the tragedy.
"Its a white lie nana , didn't you tell me about this ? 'If you want to protect someone heart , you should tell a white lies.' thats what you said to me right ?"he said.I look at him ,he is still the same chanyeol before .the talkative person everyone would hate and love at the same time.
I slap his biceps , i really hate when he does this . "Ya Im Jinah !! Why are you doing this ??" he shouted at me after i slapped his biceps hard. "Answer something irrelevant anymore or i would kill you !"i shouted at him . He glance at me ,laughing "Hoah, nana…are you sure you are a doctor ? are---you a gangster or a police officer or ....a boxer ?God your slaps might kill me ." he said with a really high tone ,he is overacting as always ,i miss this though.
But, i know he is just fussing the conversation . He doesn't want to tell me about his story , so he keeps changing the subject , joking about other things. , and looking on the other side .He needs to stop acting like this , he needs to stop running away from the reality he had.
I need to take action , i need to do something.
I place my hand on his laps and seeking his hand to hold .I need to do this , i whispered to myself. "Why didn't you tell me sooner ? "i asked as softly as i could , i don't want him to be intimidated here. "It is not easy for me ,nana.Telling someone that you would do a surgery and you know that for sure.... that you might not passed ….You know its the best to keep it by yourself until the bomb exploded .I did it for you nana."he said with a trembling voice.
My heart is shattered , it is not park chanyeol i knew before …he has this untold story more than i know but he didnt't express it because he is afraid of me ,of my feelings.He is a happy virus who always smile even though he has troubles,always laughing even though his parent forget his birthday , always strong even though the wind keeps passing his ground but it was in the past ….This park chanyeol isn't that happy virus anymore.
But he is not the only one victim here , me too.With all doubts and sadness living in minds ..im also the victim here.
"Don't you care about my feelings park chanyeol ?I waited for years ,hoping that one day you will come in front of my house …stupidly laughing and hug me… .but you didn't. Didn't you have a space on your heart to give me a chance to know how you're doing ???to know where you are living in America ?? Is that really hard for you ?"
My eyes get hot , i can feel the water starts streaming down on my face.
"I used to believe that one day…one day you would celebrate all the things you missed when you are away .The high school prom, the graduation ,the college entrance……..every single day , every single minutes when you are away i pray for this.But you didn't come……….so-"
I can see the tears also streaming down his face , he rubs my back and lean my body to his chest. I can't feel anything , but sadness in my heart.Those seven years sadness, i always keep by myself.
"So, i promised to my self that day …that winter four years ago.That i would stop thinking about you ,stop blaming myself over the tragedy …even though it is hard …i kept thinking to myself that there must be a good in goodbye ,though we never had one ."I can't stop tearing , he remain silent but his hand never stop rubbing my upper hand.
"Then you came , told me everything i wish i knew before …told me the surgery .Dont you think its hard for me too ?" i release my head from his chest and see him directly to his face.I rub his cheek , erasing his tears. "And why you didn't call me if you survive the surgery ?"i asked .
And now, he is the one who rubs my cheek from the tears "It is not important …as long as you are happy now ..my past isn't worth anything.okay ?lets just forget and start everything from the start."he smile, the smile i missed.
"So don't go to America …" i said.He nods "If thats what you want.I wouldnt go" he said. patting top of my head
This time just let me be selfish and keep him by my side.
I place my head over his shoulder and hold his hand just like the old days . In a second , he dropped his head on top of my head.Just like the old days ,when we went to the park...we didnt do anything but only like this with a closed eyes.........It is somehow bring me to the conversation we made before.
"Ah it feels refreshing...."
"Sshh.....stop talking nana."
"Why ?"
"Or we wouldnt able to hear the wind passing trough our ears.So stop talking for a minute"
"Are you dumb , of course we cannot hear the sound of a wind .Its under our decible you know that ?"
"Nothing is impossible...Just feel it nana.... with your heart and soul."
"I miss you so much , you know that ?" i said.
"I know .....i know that very well.But, cant you stop talking for a moment ..i want to hear the sound of the wind.Okay ?"
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Hi guys .
Its already on my fifth chapter and i am so happy .
I just wanna say thankyou for the subscribes and the comments .It made my day so much.
So please stay tune and keep supporting by giving comments and subscribes.Chu _^^
P.S the next chapter would be the special chapter , where we would see other character P.O.V ^^
I will give you a surprise !!
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