Author: Did you guys miss me? My reson for being M.I.A will be explained in the "interview".So I got the idea of doing character interviews from aienbest on SSF. The idea is hers, not mine. 

*Taeyeon and Tiffany enter the room all married-like*

Author: Welcome, welcome to Garden of Confession’s character interviews. Our first couple is…err… TaeNy! Hi, nice to see ya guys.

Tiffany: Hi! *insert eye smile here*

Taeyeon: *insert Sica glare here*

Author: * Ahehehe, is she okay?Worriedly clears throat*

Tiffany: Huh? Oh Tae Tae? She’s just upset.

Author: With me?

Taeyeon: Better believe it! We have no spotlight in this story. There’s a ‘taeny’ tag for a reason you know!

Author: Well, err…yeah…you see the thing is…I never really thought about your moments in this story.*nervous laugh*

Taeyeon:ARE WE NOT WORTHY OF A STINKING CHAPTER?!

Author: Of course you are! I just couldn’t fit it in naturally into the story. This is like my first major fic you know.*Backs up in chair*

Taeyeon: Fany’s hardly even in this fic!

Author: W-W-Well, you’re wife was mentioned quite a few times

Taeyeon: That was when she was buying lingerie and t-Ohoho*insert Byuntae stare here*

Tiffany: Kim Taeyeon!

Tiffany: It did look good on y-Okay, okay. Sorry! Anyway so, the number 1 SoShi couple gets 3 lines, but the prancing idiots are the heroes?!

Yuri's muffled voice outside of Author’s pimpin’ interview room: Don’t be a hater!

Taeyeon: I’ll get you back for that Kwon!

Tiffany: Tae~, we should could the author some slack. She has been sick you know.

Taeyeon: Oh you’ve been sick?

Author: Yeah, my vision has been kind of blurry and I have strep throat. But look on the bright side, you can get some spotlight in my other fic! “You’ve Got The Wrong Number”

Taeyeon: WHICH YOU HAVEN’T UPDATED EITHER!

Tiffany: CAUSE SHE’S SICK! Gosh, is your need for a chapter that demanding?!
Taeyeon: YES! *insert Fany glare here* I-I-I mean-

Tiffany: Guess who’s going to be sleeping alone tonight?

Taeyeon: But,Fany~!

Tiffany: Hmpfh. *exits pimpin’ interview room*

Author:………..

Taeyeon:……………

Author:…………….

Taeyeon:…………………

Author:…..Shouldn’t you go get her?

Taeyeon: She’s best friends with Jessica, and you want me to get her when she’s mad?

Author: Touché   

Tiffany's muffled,angry voice outside author’s pimpin’ interview room: KIM TAEYEON! GET OUT HERE NOW.

Taeyeon: Y-Yes my love! *turns to Author* I’ll find you.

Author: *prays for my life*

*The Twinnies prance into the room*

Author: Well, uhhh I was supposed to call you in but-

Yoona: Do you want us to go outside and do It again?

Yuri: ’Cause we could totally go and do it again you know.

Yoona: Yeah, we could make our entrance more epic.

Yuri: Yeah, and when we do that can you make our introduction better than theirs?

Author: Uhh, sure?

YoonYul: Sweet!

*They exit and come back*

Author: And for our second, most amazing-

Yoona: Most attractive

Yuri: Healthiest

Yoona: Coolest

Yuri: Epicest

Yoona: Is that a word?

Yuri: I think it’s a word. Is it a word?

Author: Uhh, I don’t know if it’s a word?

Yoona: Oh, well, we could make it a word.

Yuri: We’re so smart!

Author: Umm, I’m happy for you guys and such but could I possibly finish my introduction?

YoonYul: Sorry.

Author: Anyway, now it’s time for our second, but most helpful twin cupid couple, YoonYul!

YoonYul: *Start applauding for themselves*

Yuri: Oh and I heard that you were sick Author, so I brought you some Ma.

Yoona: God Yuri, no human would want to drink that.

Yuri: Hush, I’m sure Author would love it. Right?

Author: Are you up to me so that you get more moments?

Yuri: Yup *hands over Ma*

Author: Right. So, how is our reader-friendly couple doing today?

Yoona: Reader friendly?

Author: Well yeah, ever since your cupid moments the readers have been loving you even more!

Yuri: I should hope so. Do you know how hard it is to get Jessica and Sooyoung together?

Author: I’m the author.

Yuri: Oh right. Stupid question.

Yoona: So, we’re the most popular characters?

Author: Well, uh, sorta?
YoonYul: CLARIFY.

Author: Well, o-o-obviously SooSica would be m-most popular since this story is mainly about them, and after that would be K-Krystal.

Yuri: Oh well that’s fine then, She is our love child after all.

Yoona: Quit with the love child talk, Jessica won’t have any of it.

Yuri: Not like she’ll ever know.*Phone rings*

Yuri: Hello?

Jessica's voiceon the other end of Yuri’s pimpin’ phone: I hear you.

*Yuri hangs up*

Yuri: Yulsus Christ, she’s everywhere!

Author: Was that Jessica?

Yuri: Oddly yes.

Yoona: Warned you.

Yuri: I didn’t think you were serious.

Author: Well she is waiting outside.

Yuri: WHAT?! DO YOU WANT ME TO DIE?

Author: Of course not! My readers love you!

Yoona: But I love her more!

Yuri: Awwww Yoong~

Author: Okay, okay, there’s a reason that this has no ‘fluff’ tag. Out you go!

Yoona: That’s all we get for the interview?

Author: Uh, kinda. I mean I got Yuri to cook you food in the middle of the night. What more could you possibly need?

YoonYul: Well….*insert YoonYul creeper smile here*

Author: OUT!

YR & YN: Fine, fine, geez. *grumbling as they exit*

Author: I’m surrounded by horndogs.

*Temperature lowers as Jessica enters.*

Author: Hi Je-

*Jessica starts choking Author*

Author: C-C-Can’t breathe

Jessica: WHY DIDN’T YOU LET ME KNOW EARLIER THAT IT WAS SOOYOUNG?

Author: S-S-Still can’t b-breathe

Jessca: ANSWER ME NAO.

Author: I-I k-kept dropping h-hints.

Jessica: LIKE HOW.

Author: N-Need…a-air

*Loosens hold on Author and sits down*

Author: *inhales* Sweet, sweet, oxygen. Anyway, I gave you a bunch of hints! Krystal almost said Sulli’s name like twice.

Jessica: That sneaky little-

Author: And I also mentioned Sooyoung ‘visits the flower shop a lot’.

Jessica: Yeah but-

Author: And her exaggerated reaction over the Botanical Gardens?

Jessica: UGH!

Author: Now, Ms. Jung. Please. This interview cannot be conducted without your cooperation. In other words….please stop kicking my leg.

Jessica: Fine.

Author: So, how are you feeling after Krystal’s slip-up?

Jessica: Slip up my . You planned that.

Author: You could at least play along with it y’know.

Jessica: Alright, fine. I was surprised. I didn’t expect it to be Sooyoung. But thanks to YOU, it makes sense now.

Author: Ahehehe, but you’re not sad it’s Sooyoung ahehehehe

Jessica: Do you want to die?

Author: See, you’re even talking like her now!

*Temperature keeps dropping*

Author: *awkwardly clears throat* A-Anyway, I can’t interview you for long.

Jessica: Great.

Author: Aren’t you going to ask why?

Jessica: No. Less questions, less time I have to be here, more time I can sleep.

Author: *whispers*I sometimes wonder how you two are roommates in real life,

Jessica: Excuse me?

Author: Nothing! Nothing at all! You can go now, and please send your sister in after you.

Jessica: Oh I’ll send her in all right.

Author: In one piece.

Jessica: Damn.

*Jessica leaves, Krystal enters all swag-like*

Author: And for our most popular-at-the-moment-character, I present Krystal Jung!

Krystal: Yo.

Author: You really are meant for Amber.

Krystal;D

Author: So,-

Krystal: Wait, are you implying that I’m not popular all the time?

Author: N-No, not all. It’s just your popularity kinda surpasses most at the moment.

Krystal: Oh really now?

Author: Yes, yes indeed. You’ve been the world’s coolest sister in these past few chapters.

Krystal: I’m always the world’s coolest sister *hair flip*

Author: Um, yeah. So anyway, how do you feel about your sister and Sooyoung.

Krystal: They are so meant to be. If it weren’t for me and my twin parents, who knows where they would be right now.

Author: Your…twin parents?

Krystal: Yoona and Yuri unnie.

Author: Ahhh, should I make an adoption chapter then?

Krystal: That would be beautiful.

Author: Awesome, so what makes you so slick when it comes to you and SooSica?

Krystal: I don’t even know, it’s like I have this 6^th sense for like, my sister’s pathetic love life you know?

Author: I see.

Krystal: Yeah, I’m like, meant to fix it. Plus, her face when I yelled she was was priceless.

Author: Oh yes, the readers must have loved that.

Krystal: The readers love me *hair flip*

Author: Uh huh, and my final que-

Krystal: Those are all the questions I get?

Author: Uh…what do you mean?

Krystal: I mean you’re not going to ask me what kind of toothpaste I use or something?

Author:……

Krystal: Well?

Author: Umm, I don’t have much time to ask you all of that.

Krystal: Oh, so you’re too good for toothpaste? Pfft, after all I did for your story.

Author: ……I’ll give you a toothpaste section in another chapter, okay?

Krystal: Damn straight *hair flip*

Author: So, what are you going to do if your sister suddenly starts doubting Sooyoung as the flower person?

Krystal: Well, I *phone rings* one second. Yes?...Amber!...Interview with the author…uh huh…uh huh….sure!..Kay bye, love you too.

Author: Um so back to my questi-

Krystal: Yeah, about that, Amber’s taking me out so we’ll finish this another time, arasso?

Author: But-

Krystal: Oh and Sunny and Hyomin can’t make it today. Something about catching chickens or what not.

Author: At least send Sooyoung in on your way out!

Krystal: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

*Door slams, Krystal leaves*

Author: *sigh* Dealing with two princesses is no easy task.

*Sooyoung enters the room with a candy bar*

Sooyoung: OhMyGahh, Amurrican choclagatee isshh shoo good

Author: I’m sorry, what?

*Sooyoung swallows*

Sooyoung: American chocolate is so good!

Author: Yeah, but Brazilian one’s are better.

Sooyoung: Do you have any?

Author: Uh, no. *Hides chocolate*

Sooyoung: Are you sure?

Author: Completely.

Sooyoung: Damn.

Author: So, a big round of applause for our Shikshin Casanova, our flower-wielding Romeo..Sooyoung!

Sooyoung:….We’re the only ones here.

Author: Well, we have readers don’t we? And I was doing it for effect.

Sooyoung: Ahhh, I see.

Author: Indeed so…uhhh…I can’t really…take you seriously with chocolate smeared across your face.

Sooyoung: Huh? Oh sorry.

Author: So, how’s everything?

Sooyoung: Good.

Author: How do you feel about YoonYul?

Sooyoung: Those meddling kids.

Author: Nice Scooby Doo quote you got there.

Sooyoung: I know right. But honestly, I don’t even know if I should listen to them anymore.

Author: But they’re like, YoonYul. You can’t deny YoonYul.

Sooyoung: That’s obvious, but every other day seems to be a new plan from them. I don’t trust their scheming relationship.

Author: Oh really now? *makes mental note*

Sooyoung: Uh huh

Author: How’s Jessica?

Sooyoung: y.

Author: Not what I meant.

Sooyoung: Oh! Well, she still doesn’t really know anything.

Author: How long until you tell her?

Sooyoung: Aren’t you the author though?

Author: Dude, you’re killing my flow. It’s all for effect man, effect.

Sooyoung: I can’t cooperate on an empty stomach.

Author:….YOU ATE THE ENTIRE FOOD TABLE WHILE YOU WERE WAITING.

Sooyoung:  And your point is.

Author: Ugh, I don’t even know. So, how are you feeling?

Sooyoung: Hungry.

Author: Besides that.

Sooyoung: Good, I guess.

Author: Don’t feel nervous or worried for the future?

Sooyoung: Nope…..Should I?

Author: Nope, nope not at all.

Sooyoung: But then why would you ask me if-

Author: OH WOULD YOU LOOK AT THAT WE’RE OUT OF TIME.

Sooyoung: But I’m a main character!

Author: You’ll see in the future.

Sooyoung: Bu-

Author: Want to go to a buffet?

Sooyoung: Sure!

Muffled YoonYul voices outside of pimpin’ interview room: BRING US TOO!

Sooyoung: Dear God, they’re everywhere.

Author: Let’s just go out the back door.

Muffled YoonYul: WE WILL FIND YOU FOR LEAVING US DINONUMBER4. WE WILL FIND YOU.

Author: What did I do to deserve this?! I just wanted a simple interview!