Finally another chapter!
I have been reading this great fanfic for the last couple of days,
and really, I could not concentrate on my own fanfic anymore. XD
I hope you are all still enjoying the story,
even though it is not that exciting all the time. :)
As I said before, the last character is coming soon,
I still have to make a good entrance for this person,
but I think you all know who it is.
Enjoy the chapter!
Tinywings

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I quickly ran to my room, forcing myself not to let my eyes wander around the house. If I were to see my mother right now, I wonder what I will do. I may even go crazy and yell at her, and normally I would, but this time, I was scared to death that it would only make her snap, drive her crazy, make her lose sanity. So instead, I locked myself up in my room. I tried to calm down my breathing and heart beating as I sat against the door, convincing myself that I am save now. It was only when I calmed down, that those words haunted me again.

“If you stopped thinking about how long this love may last, but only think about the moments you are sharing right now, how does that feel then? I mean, why would you want to think about a lifetime, when you can also think about now?”

I bet every girl would want to live a lifetime with the person she loves. To stop thinking about how long this love may last, only means that I already gave up on him to last with me for a lifetime, and that is something unbearable for me. Because I do not want to love him for only the moment, but I want our love to last until our last breath. This love is not something in the spur of the moment, but something I am sure of.

“Minhee, that was something that made Yoona so special to him, because she knew exactly what Sungyeol thought.”

I sighed as I threw myself on the bed. So many things were in my mind, I did not know what to do anymore. Even though I stand by my own belief, I did promise Sungyeol that I would replace Yoona when necessary. Since Sungyeol said he wants to try, I should try my best too, even though I doubt I can do it. The more I think about it, the more it seems impossible for me to replace Yoona, since we are so incredibly different. And another sorrowful thought quickly followed, reminding me that Sungyeol is just as distant from me.

“Sungyeol-ah…”

I muttered to myself, hesitating about what I want to say, but before I knew it, it already slipped out of my mouth.

“What is happiness?”

-

I looked up from my computer as I heard something by the window, but there was nothing but the blackness of the night. I shrugged my shoulders before continuing with what I was doing, but then I heard that sound again, as if something was being thrown against the window. I sighed as I realized what, or rather who it could be. Only Myungsoo could do something as pathetic as that, when he could just call me and tell me he is here. I shook my head with a smile as I walked to the window.

“What?”

I said as I opened the window, confirming that it was indeed Myungsoo who was throwing pebbles against my window.

“You do know that you have to pay for it when you break the window, right?”

I said with a playful smirk, earning a scoff from him.

“Even in the middle of the night-” He shook his head. “I did not come here to argue with you about your hopeless attitude.”

“What brought you here at such a time?”

I continued as I opened the window some more so I could lean out a little. Myungsoo shifted his body uncomfortably, as if he did not know how to begin. I raised my eyebrow as I saw it. Myungsoo never hesitated to say anything to me. He is way too straightforward to me to hesitate like this.

“What-”

“I just saw Minhee.”

A small smile unconsciously crept on my lips, but I let him continue.

“She was crying.”

The smile was instantly replaced by a frown. Crying?

“I was on my way home when I saw her on the street, crying. She would not tell me why, though.”

“Is she alright?”

I was surprised with the amount of concern I was talking right now. It had been a while since I was worried so much about someone, except for my mother and Myungsoo.

“Alright is a big word, but she was not hurt physically. I brought her home and watched her as she went inside, so at least she is at home right now. I just came here to tell you that, because maybe you would know something.”

I shook my head slightly. She was all smiles when we parted today, so certainly, I did not do anything. Maybe something happened… At home. I closed my eyes tightly as I searched in my mind for the conversations she shared with me about her parents. Maybe, it was because of her parents again.

“Maybe she was just in a bad mood.”

Myungsoo continued to reason out loud, and I gave him a nod of agreement as I opened my eyes again. Maybe it was something with her parents after all. I will call her when Myungsoo leaves.

“You did not, by any chance,” Myungsoo’s face suddenly hardened, “said anything stupid to her?”

My eyes widened in surprise. Did he just suspect me? So much for being childhood friends, Kim Myungsoo.

“Do I look like something reckless to you?”

“Yes.”

He said seriously, and I could not help but sigh in frustration.

“I did not do anything.”

Myungsoo nodded slightly, and I could see he was still suspicious.

“Why do you not believe me, damn it!”

I burst out, but Myungsoo’s calm expression did not waver, making me all the angrier.

“I believe you did not do anything wrong, in your own eyes that is. You have no idea how painful your words are sometimes.”

I did not argue back, realizing what he was trying to say. However, I am so convinced that this time, I did not say anything stupid. I thought thoroughly about the words before I said them, really.

“But Myungsoo, this time, I did not. I did not do anything stupid this time, unlike that time.”

Perhaps Myungsoo knew me better than I knew myself, because he seems to know how I will react in every situation. But believe me when I say that this time, I had full control of the whole situation. Only that one moment, when I opened up to her, it seemed like I lost it for just that one moment, but I quickly grabbed hold of myself again.

“I told Minhee about Yoona.”

My attention was instantly on Myungsoo as he said that name.

“What did you say?”

My voice was trembling a bit, and I did not like it that once it came to her, I would feel this indescribable feeling inside of me. I did not like it, and I did not like to talk about her either because of that.

“About what you and Yoona have in common.”

A bitter smile crept on my lips.

“Why would you say it to her? Does it make you happy to hurt her?”

“I did not hurt her!”

“You did!”

I yelled furiously, and I was sure the neighbors were hearing me clearly too. But I did not care about anything but what Myungsoo did, because Myungsoo went too far this time. I did not ask him to mingle himself in my business, and I certainly was not going to forgive him for doing so.

“Why did you tell her about Yoona? Why?!”

Myungsoo was clearly shocked because of my sudden outburst, but he quickly recovered.

“She has the right to know.”

“What did you say?”

I asked with gritted teeth, hoping he did not say too much.

“I told about what made Yoona special to you, but also,” He gave me an unsure expression, “I told her about you.”

My eyes widened in horror. He clearly was out of his mind, and then to say that I am the one who acts reckless, unbelievable.

“Just when things are getting better, you have to ruin it? Just when I said I want to try, you have to destroy it all?”

“But Sungyeol-”

“Do not say anything more, and just leave.”

I said tiredly while staring blankly at him. I had nothing to say anymore, and I did not want to hear any of his explanations. He could not reason his way out this time, and even if he could, I did not want to hear it.

“Sungyeol-”

“Go.”

“Yeol-”

“Do not think that just because we are close to each other, that I am going to let this past, Kim Myungsoo.”

I said while glaring at him, and he did not say anything anymore. Instead, he simple nodded and walked away, not even bothering to say goodbye, but I know I would not answer his goodbye anyways. I closed the window with a sigh, my mind wandering to what Myungsoo had just said. I was mad that I did not know she was having a rough time, and the worst is, she did not tell me. Maybe she did not have the time. At least, that thought comforted my heart.

I think I know exactly what Myungsoo has told her, and I did not like it, not even a little bit. He had his reason, of course, he always had, but it did not justify his actions in my eyes. Telling her the things I wanted to tell her when I am ready, it felt almost unfair to me. I was trying so hard, and even so, Myungsoo had to break all my hard work with one conversation. Maybe I was not even that mad about what he told her, it was just that I wanted to be the one to tell her everything.

I wanted to confidently say to her that Yoona is the past, when I have forgotten about Yoona completely. I sat behind the computer and searched for the pictures, sighing in relief as I finally found them. The pictures I made with Yoona, including the one I deleted in front of Minhee, they were still on my computer. Even though it was unfair to Minhee, there was no way I could forget Yoona, yet.