FYI:  so i'm a little worried about this chapter and i can't tell if it's bad timing or just the way i wrote it....oh well if everyone absolutely hates it i'll delete the chapter and rewrite but we'll see how this goes^^  be honest too, please - the story's only here for you guys!

Clothes from Jungryul (maybe wait until you get to this part before opening the link?  but i don't think it really matters^^) : http://i.ysi.bz/Assets/GalleryImage/02/192/L_g0015519202.jpg

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Helen had avoided Hyun’s calls for long enough – he was particularly mad when she never showed up at the hotel that night and even more angry when she refused to tell him where she was.  “I’ll come to you when I need to talk or else the next time I’ll see you is back at base.”  Helen stated before hanging up.  Hoya stood in the doorway, holding a breakfast tray, as he watched Helen pace back and forth on the small front porch.  She had about four feet to walk before she would run into a railing or the stairs.  Part of him wanted to laugh – she looked silly being able to travel only a small distance before having to turn around – but another part of him was worried – Base?  

Helen had spent the night with Hoya and Sungjong in the living room.  Jungryul was skeptical leaving Hoya and Sungjong in charge of Helen but apparently they had done a good job – seeing as she was still with them when they woke up in the morning. 

Sungjong had woken up first, as usual, but instead of waking the other members – they didn’t have any schedules today and no one had been awake when they arrived home late last night – he headed out to the nearest market to buy food.  He wanted to please Helen with a great, big breakfast of his own creation to show his gratitude, and possibly warm her heart to make her want to stay.  He had never seen Jungryul cry because of such a great sadness and more than anything he never wanted to see that again.  Sungjong liked Helen but he had also come to a conclusion that she was the one who had done such a terrible thing to his Hyung.  He felt as if he had to weigh both sides of the story – Helen with dangerous secrets that she didn’t want to keep (yes, he’d seen the way she looked at Hoya and he, too, could see a secret playing behind her eyes) or Jungryul, his manager who had kept him in line but also shown him how to grown into his own skin over the past year.  Sungjong kept these thoughts to himself while keeping his optimistic personality fresh and revitalizing for everyone in the dorm.

Sungjong had nudged Hoya awake, informing him of where he was going and if he could borrow some money.  It wasn’t until after Sungjong left did Hoya rub his eyes open and stretch; it took him a minute to realize he was lying on the living room floor and he had just punched something soft.  “Aish…” he whispered to himself, as Helen groaned softly and pulled the blanket they shared closer to her face.  It hadn’t taken long for Helen to fall asleep last night and the two boys snuggled in on either side of her.  Hoya realized how peaceful she was; he’d given her his pillow to use but throughout the night she’d pushed it out of her way and only used her arm.  He chuckled.  This is how it should be, Helen…nothing to worry you or make you cry.  What are you hiding from?  Who’s hurting you?  He watched her sleep until he felt the desire creeping up in his stomach; he wanted to touch her cheek, move her hair, and run his thumb along her lips.  Hoya pushed the blanket off of his body and sat up, leaning against the couch behind him. 

Helen felt the movement and started to wake up.  She shivered and quickly pulled the blanket up to her chest; looking beneath the cover she realized she was wearing a large t-shirt –one of the guys’ - that reached her knees.  “Good morning.”  Hoya chimed at her.  She ruffled her hair, smiling at him.  Helen was about to reply but stopped herself.  “What?”

She looked away as a large smile appeared on her face; she looked around the room as if checking to see if anyone else was listening.  “This is the first time in nine years that I haven’t had a nightmare.”  She whispered at him; she grinned, showing her white teeth. 

Hoya didn’t quite understand.  “What do you mean?  You’ve had nightmares every night since you were 14?”

It seemed as if Helen had forgotten who she was talking to, having been used to waking up and having Hyun right by her side.  Usually Hyun would be waiting for her to wake up so he could comfort her right away; Helen had forgotten that she’d spent the night in Infinite’s apartment and not anywhere near Hyun or what she had thought to be safe.  “Oh…” Helen’s reply was a whisper.  “Nevermind.  It’s not important.”  She threw the blankets off of her lower body and stood up but Hoya caught the bottom of the large shirt. 

“Ya, anja.” Hoya tugged on the fabric. 

Helen looked around and realized Sungjong wasn’t next to her.  “Eodie?” Helen asked as she pointed to an empty blanket next to her. 

“He left to get some food to make you for breakfast.”  Hoya had begun to feel a little upset; she didn’t seem to want to talk to him...about anything important and was more focused on her surroundings than him.  Hoya changed his tone, sounding unimpressed. 

“Oh…”  Helen said again.  Slowly she took her seat next to Hoya; their backs pressed again the couch.  There was a silence embracing the two of them as they sat, unmoving, in the living room.  Hoya would glance out of the corner of his eye, wondering what she was doing, what she was thinking; Helen stared straight ahead – she’d tried to ignore the persisting thoughts of Hyun popping into her mind every few seconds.  What happens if he’s found out I’m here?  What will happen to these boys?  She began to panic. Hoya noticed her arm’s tensing as she gripped the blanket beneath her in tight fists. 

“Hey…” Hoya scooted closer to her, putting his hand on her fist.  “Hajima.”  The touch fuzzed Helen’s thoughts and she focused on what Hoya had said instead.  “What’s wrong?”  He asked her, tilting his head, trying to get a better understanding of what was going on inside her brain.  Helen didn’t respond but she opened , trying to find the words; she turned her head, looking at Hoya in silence.  Her eyes became glossy and Hoya couldn’t stand it anymore.  “Ya!” he exclaimed, shifting closer to Helen and cupping her small face in his palms.  Helen tried to look away but Hoya kept his grip and forced her to look at him; her eyes pooled with water but she didn’t let a single tear fall.  “Uji malayo.”  He watched her as his thumb rubbed her cheekbone softly.  Helen pursed her lips, fighting back her fear but Hoya saw all of it, “Whatever you’re thinking, stop.”  Hoya lifted her face, making sure she understood how serious he was; Hoya wasn’t the type of boy to sit by a let a girl cry on his shoulder.  He didn’t like it in general and he especially didn’t like seeing Helen vulnerable – in all honesty he missed that smiling face she’d given him when she served him pancakes a few mornings ago.

“Hoya…” she whispered; he could feel a soft patch of air hit his cheek as she spoke – he’d moved so close to her.  “You don’t understand.”  The tear fell from her eyes and landed in Hoya’s palm; his hands dropped as if it was acid on his skin and he stood up, not wanting to hear more.

“Why are you being like this?!”  He yelled, kicking the table and turning around to punch the wall as well. 

His violence startled Helen; it wasn’t what he had expected his reaction to be.  “Hoya…” she spoke, trying to calm him down.  Hoya turned to face her, his chest heaving as he breathed through his nostrils.  “It’s so hard to explain…” Helen sighed, once she had his attention.  “There’s…it’s such a long story.”  She brought her hand up, brushing her bangs out of the way as she leaned her body towards him. 

“I hate these games that you’re playing, Helen; I don’t have time to ask you twenty questions to just get to know you.” Hoya spat.

Helen winced, “I’ve got two options, Hoya.” Helen looked away, deciding if what she was about to say was breaking protocol.  “Either I stay here with you and Jungryul and live as if nothing has happened or I return to my work…return to Madacorp.”  She looked up at Hoya, her cold, blue eyes daring him to yell at her again, but he refused to speak or look at her.

“The man from last night…Jin Hyun…?” Hoya finally spoke, looking at her and raising his eyebrows.  He looked so innocent and naive, but he was obviously looking for an explanation.

“He’s my…my teammate…” Helen answered, hoping that would be enough.

“Your teammate for what?  Competitions?”  Hoya spoke sarcastically.

“Hoya…” Helen warned.  “We…the two of us…Madacorp…”  Helen didn’t know where to start; there was so much to tell and so much she couldn’t say – Madacorp was a government agency and she contained a lot of top secret information.  She couldn’t just start spilling all their confidential missions to a Korean idol.

Hoya squatted down on his bedding next to Helen.  “Just tell me.”

Helen sighed and looked around the empty room once again before looking at Hoya again.  “Madacorp…we specialize in a type of “protection for the people”.  My unit, in particular, isn’t entirely special because all we can do is fight.”  She watched Hoya, waiting for a reaction – he swallowed hard but said nothing.  “We compensate, you know?  Because we lack the other talents we fight very well.”  Hoya was so confused; nothing she was saying was making sense.  When he still didn’t respond Helen continued to talk, “This is why I didn’t want to tell you, Hoya.  You’re giving me this look and it’s exactly what I never wanted to see, especially from you.”  Helen sighed and turned her head away.

“I was there…at the restaurant.”  Hoya pulled her chin back towards him.  “I followed you into the men’s restroom…”  The sentence would’ve sounded strange in any other context.  “I met Jin Hyun that night.”  Helen’s eyes went wide but Hoya kept talking before she could speak, “We didn't say anything to each other.” The words comforted Helen.  “But the way he looked at me that night…it was a different man than the one we just had dinner with.” Hoya dropped his hand from her chin and returned to resting his back against the couch; he looked at the blank wall across the room while Helen continued to stare at him, stunned.  “I guess…in a way…we did talk that night.  Hyun was caring you out of the bathroom; he wouldn’t let me touch you or get near you…and then he carried you out of the restaurant.  When he passed me…” Hoya rubbed his forehead – remembering seeing her having a date with Hyun had made him irritated to the bone, “I could tell he was daring me…daring me to come near you.  He wanted to see…how much you meant to me.”  Hoya’s head fell – he was upset with himself. 

Helen was taking in his words one by one trying to imagine that night.  He’s upset because he didn’t do anything.  Helen realized. 

“I didn’t act then, Helen; I’m ashamed because of that.  I was afraid of what had happened to you; I was afraid I wouldn’t see you again.  All I could imagine was how fragile you looked, laying there, unconscious…”

“Hoya…” Helen laid a delicate hand on his shoulder.

“I want to do this, Helen.  It’s racing through my veins…this want…this desperate need to protect you.”  Hoya turned towards Helen and her hand fell from his body.  Hoya cupped her face in his hands, moving his face closer to hers.  “I don’t like Hyun…I can’t change that; if he’s who you’re scared of…I swear…” Hoya huffed.

His innocence and naive beliefs were cute to Helen.  “Hoya.” Helen put her hand on top of his, sighing and shaking her head.  “You don’t understand-“

Hoya put his hand behind her head, pulling her into a rushed kiss.  His eyes were closed tightly, tasting Helen’s vanilla lips under his own as his shoulders rose and the muscles tightened.  He subconsciously growled under his breath – it wasn’t like him to be this forceful.  Helen kissed back, puckering her lips against his as if it was a habit but her neck tensed and Hoya had to keep a grip on the base of her skull to keep her from breaking their connection.

Hoya pushed the blanket between them aside and moved closer to Helen; their legs brushed against each others as he gripped her waist.  Hoya separated from her lips, hovering above them, parting them slightly and silently begging her to let him kiss her again.  He grew impatient and wanted to feel her lips against his own, quickly.  He didn’t wait for her response – yes or no – and kissed them softly a second time; he rubbed the fuzz on her cheek sending a tingle of pleasure down his own spine.  Hoya breathed through his nose, taking in her scent; it calmed him like valium – it made him euphoric. 

Hoya returned, hungrily for a third kiss but as if an electric shot had zapped his lips upon touching Helen he retreated, hitting the table lightly in frustration.  Someone was walking in the front door.  He moved away from her, awkwardly and without saying anything – he was breathing heavily though causing Helen to smirk – she’d obviously made an impression. 

“Oh, annyeong!”  Sungjong called, while taking off his shoes – he hadn’t seen anything.  “Helen!  You’re awake?”  He called, stepping over the shoe barrier. 

Helen glanced over at Hoya; she couldn’t help but blush when he looked her way.  “Now I am.”  She smiled at Sungjong and Hoya laughed under his breath, letting out a small snicker. 

“Ya, move aside, Sungjong.”  Jungryul was carrying bags in his arms.

“Oh ne!”  Sungjong walked into the kitchen and set the groceries on the floor, sighing with relief.  “Noooona,” he sang, “I want to make you breakfast, ok?”

Helen grinned, “Sure.”

Hoya groaned, rubbing his face.  “Ugh…Sungjong…”  He looked at Helen whose cheeks were still pink and he laughed again. 

“Mwo?” Sungjong was unconcerned as he searched through the kitchen for clean pots and pans.

“Nothing!”  Helen leaned past Hoya, smiling at Sungjong.

“Helen…” Jungryul called, trying to balance himself between the bags while taking off his shoes.  She rushed over to help him; once he handed her some of the bags she realized they weren’t full of more groceries or food but instead were bags from different stores around Hongdae.  Jungryul shops at fancy clothing stores like these?  She took them from his hands and set them on the other side of the barrier; she turned to go back and fix up her bedding but Jungryul called out after her.  “Ya, hold on.”  He fumbled with the remaining bags on his arms, searching for one in particular.  “Go in the bathroom and put this on.”  Helen frowned but accepted the bag.  “I can’t have you running around looking all tough and tom-boyish; besides…I like seeing you dressed up.”  He smiled

Helen rolled her eyes.  “Appa…not this again.  I’m not your play doll that you get to have tea parties with.”  She pulled open the handles of the bag and moved the packaging around so she could see the outfit better.  “Oh you’ve got to be kidding me!  Appa!”  Helen stomped her foot.

“See, you’re being girly already.  Gaja!”  He shooed her towards the bathroom causing Hoya to laugh loudly.  Helen sent a glare in his direction as she walked out of the room.