Chapter 14

Flashback

The unfamiliar piles of emotion that made him feel the way he did whenever her hands were benignly caressing his skin, made his heart beat for the first time.

Lust made him go wild, hiding the truth behind his actions.

The heart that stopped beating made its first pulse the moment he opened his door to her, on the night the moon was at its zenith. On the night where everything was starting to change.

From the heat of the previous night still radiating on his body, Cheondung woke up to the cool air surrounding his bedroom. Sitting up, he lazily ruffled his golden locks and turned his head only to see her peacefully sleeping by his side. He lays back, propping himself on one elbow, and pushed some hair strands backwards as he let his finger gracefully her cheek. The bed sheets were barely covering her body as he let his eyes wander to gaze at her exposed skin. He lightly grazed her cheek down to the mark on her neck, down to the few others light bites he gave her on her collarbone to the upper part of her covered chest. Seeing her like this, so vulnerable and defenseless, he could barely hold himself in, wanting to drown, once more, in the pool of pure bliss.

From his elbow, he hovered his body over her, placing his legs on each of hers and leaned his face closer to her neck, the scent of her afterglow seductively embracing her marked skin, attracting him closer to her. He bit his bottom lip as he leaned his forehead closer to hers, barely touching it and shut his eyes tight, the unfamiliar rush of emotion taking over, for just a second, making him weak to the frozen heart.

He pushed himself back and carefully got out of bed, successfully with her still asleep. He walked to his bathroom and quietly closed the door behind him, preparing for his morning shower.

He stood in front of the mirror, his palms against the counter and leaned towards it taking a deep breath. He looked up and saw a small bruise on his collarbone. He smirked and grazed over the mark as he thought about the moment he received it. From there, his mind wandered step by step through every movement of his night in bed where he got a taste of her innocence, devouring it away for the first time.

From all the women he has been with, the thinking over was a first.

He brought countless women to his bed and sent them back before the night was even over, but for her, he couldn't.

He didn't want to.

For more than once, he got her to scream his name, creating goose bumps all over his white skin. Affected for the first time from such a voice, it only made him wanting to go deeper into that bliss.

Like a drug, he wanted more.

He the water from the bathtub and dived in, letting the drops run down on his skin. He emptied his mind from everything, simply enjoying the feeling of having the droplets of water fall on his muscled body. He looked down and noticed a few more marks all over his chest, the shape of her lips visible in each one of them. He lightly retraces them and lets a deep breath out not able to control himself from thinking, once again, about last night.

He got what he wanted from her, a simple distraction from his misery, and the feeling that he got to taste as it waved through had a powerful impact to make him relive it again and again. He never thought that someone like her would ever give him something, so pleasurable, like this.

From something that she never experienced before last night, he gave her a reason to stick around.

He shook his head, amused as his mind constantly went back to her; to the way she looked so heart broken when he got so cruel with his words, to the way she looked so by caressing her untouched skin, to the way she would simply look at him as if he was a piece of art. He knew what kind of girl she was and a part of him hated her because of that.

Seeing the world in color was a naïve way to live a life. To be chirpy about every aspect surrounding you was something so stupid to do because it was simply an illusion, a lie that was blocking the brutal reality of living in this world. Every drop of vivid colors was being washed away by the sorrow that exist. Painted over by the darkest of minds to simply overtake everything that was good and destroy it.

That's why he hated her. Because she was so close minded about the world she was living in he couldn't stand to look at her like that. Using her to make her feel pain was probably the best thing he could do to her, to make her understand that life was nothing else but a hell hole. Nothing good coming out of it.

- Noona! Noona! Where are you?

- I'm right here Sanghyun-ah!

The little boy followed the voice until he reached the little pond from the garden. There stood his older sister holding a kitten in her arm, gently its fur. He walks closer to her and smiles looking at the baby cat comfortably sitting on his sister's lap, enjoying the attention.

- Where did you find the cat, Noona?

- Here. I caught him before he fell into the water.

- Can I hold him?

- Off course!

 He sits on the ground waiting for his sister to place the cat on his lap. As she did so, he carefully his head, not wanting to scare the little animal away. Hearing him purr, Sanghyun smiled, enjoying seeing the pet liking his touch.  He looks up at his sister who had her eyes on the pet, a small smile on her face.

- Noona?

- Yes?

- Can we keep him?

- I guess we can if they say yes. Do you want me to ask?

- Please?

- Sure

The four years old boy got excited, thinking that he might have a new pet to take care of.

Something he could share with his older sister.

The only family he had left.

- Sanghyun-ah!

He looked up to his sister coming back towards him as a nun stood on the porch behind her. He got up on his two feet, the cat still in his arms and met his sister halfway.

- I'm sorry, but she said that we couldn't… Some of the other kids are allergic to cats and she said that she didn't want to risk them being exposed. I'm so sorry

- Oh…

She looked at her baby brother with sad eyes, placing her hand on his shoulder.

- I promise you that once we get out of here, when I'll be old enough to leave, I'll take you with me and once we found a small place to live in, we can buy our own cat.

She smiles at her little brother, hoping that her words would be able to comfort him.

- Really?

- Hmm

They seal the promise by intertwining their little fingers together, something to hold on to in the future, where it will become the only thing that will keep them from falling apart.

I miss you, Noona.

I miss you so much.

I'm sorry.

For everything.

Please, forgive me.

Next: The Great Escape