I - The Spitting Cobra

Treacherous

Jiyong P.O.V

 

I didn't even bother to turn off my alarm because I NEVER really got the chance to switch it off to be honest. I was pissed off (again) to how early I always wake up that I just jumped off from my bed with tired eyes. I sighed as I saw it was just 5 AM in the morning.

 

                                                                                     

 

"Damn you clock."

 

Like my everyday routine, I had my ten-minute shower and picked up my daily uniform. A white ragged t-shirt and a pair of my favorite pants will finish my typical look.

As if on cue, my nephew, Jiwon, cried his lungs out. I sighed as  I knew I had to make him his milk before my sister throws him out of their room. Uhuh. Dami noona once left Jiwon outside our house when he made his scandalous cries early in the morning. I knew better than to let her handle the situation.

After successfully putting Jiwon to sleep again, I rushed downstairs to start the laundry. We don't have a washing machine so I end up washing them with my bare hands. Even though piles of clothes were always left in my hands, I doesn't even bug me. As long as I do well and I could finally pay my debts, I would do everything I could for them.

Now it's time for ironing. This one has always been tricky. I can never pass the day without having burns because of mini-accidents. Good thing our neighbor suggested that I would drip vinegar on my burns and mind you, it actually works!

As I was ironing Dami noona's favorite dress, my handphone rang. That's odd. Who would call me at this hour?? I'm pretty sure I quitted that newspaperboy job I had a week ago.

 

"Yoboseo?"

"Hello, sorry to bother you at this fine hour but I would like to tell you you've been hired."

 

                                                                                 

 

If it not was for the lady's enthusiasm, I would have hung up the phone. ME? HIRED? What the hell. This would be the first time I didn't have to beg for my job!

I was so psyched that I hurriedly switched my full attention to the lady.

 

"Uhm...are you sure? I am Mr. Kwon Jiyong. Are you sure I'm the one you're calling?!"

 

Though it sounded absurd, I was quite relieved she just went on.

 

"Absolutely, Mr. Kwon Jiyong. We are in-need of helpers in our today's event and we would like your services. I would dictate to you to where you can find us."

 

HOLY MOTHER OF POVERTY she is talking to me! I didn't even bother to get a paper. I just grabbed the pen on our end table and scribbled the details on my arm. Heck what do they care, I am excited as !

 

"Thank you so much! I would be there at 8 sharp!!"

 

After she hung up, I was jumping like a lunatic until I smelled something unpleasant.

 

HOLY .

I looked to where the smoke is coming from. I thought I just saw my deathbed in the ironing stand that I just stood there mortified. OH .

Remind me to take FIRE 101 lessons after this. Because I panicked hard, I was blowing air to the little fire I made on DAMI NOONA'S DRESS and I even took the fan, hoping it would estinguish the fire. But as a dumb-o I am, IT JUST GOT WORSE.

 

"KWON JIYONG!!!!!"

 

                                                                              

 

OH CRAP HERE COMES THE TERMINATOR.

Dami noona was about to bulge her eyeballs out with the scene, leaving me shaking like hell. I was praying she would not throw me into the fire and let me burn to ashes but I guess I had my luck this time. She quickly went to the kitchen and filled a bowl with water and with her miraculous act, the fire eventually died.

Though the house was full of fog, I can still see her scrunching her eyebrows, which I thought would be perfect in my mental collection of her unibrow moments. I was almost tempted to run for it but she was angry as .

 

"DON'T LET ME GET YOU, YOU DEVIL."

 

Oh no. I was not stupid not to get what she meant. I hurried my way out of our house and it seems like I would not see my room for about a few days.

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TOP P.O.V

 

"Sir, we checked all the models for the event and they're on their way here."

 

"How about the clothes?", I asked her.

 

"Perfectly altered for them, Sir."

 

"Good. Get me a copy of the program and I'll call you later."

 

 

My assistant had the blood of the Flash in her system. I was smirking to see how she was doing her job very seriously when I told her she needs to fasten up her pace. I really don't like the likes of a turtle. I wanted to smash their shells and make them eat their shattered pieces. I'm not a sadist, but I can be one when I like to.

Our mini fashion show will start in a few hours and wanted everything to be perfect. Even the catering we hired should be well dressed and the folds of their customized aprons must be folded accordingly. If not, I would not hesitate to fire them for being clumsy. The runway was built the night before and it looks just fine for me. As for the models, I personally picked them according to my taste. I don't want lame-looking girls wearing my clothes. It the awesomeness out of me.

 

"Sir, we have a problem!"

 

Did I tell you I'm allergic to that phrase? I nearly wanted to get my assistant fried if not for her fast reflexes.

 

"The floral team had some problems with their manpower. But they said we need not to worry for their back-ups are on their way here!"

 

I raised my brow on her. "Back-ups? You mean, amateurs?"

 

"Erm....it would be good if we should not assume that they are, Sir."

 

                                                                         

 

She was shaking as hell as I stared at her. Honestly, I didn't like to how she acted like SHE'S BETTER THAN ME. I hated on how people shove their opinions to higher-ranking persons especially if it would someone who is CHOI SEUNGHYUN.

 

"Get out of my sight."

 

"S-S-S-sir?"

 

"In case they would mess up my show, their flowers to get some manners. You're damn fired."

 

I felt great as I walked out on her. I didn't care if she begged down her knees there. All I knew was that what I told her is just a piece of art! THEIR FLOWERS TO GET SOME MANNERS. Man! My rhyming's getting better! BOOYAH!

But before I can celebrate my little victory, I had to attend to that ty floral team first before they can ruin things for me. Tch. PEOPLE ARE JUST PLAIN CLUMSY and how dare they flaunt their clumsiness on Korea's Next TOP Fashion Brand Founder!

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Jiyong P.O.V

 

It turns out this is not really my day. The job that I got is just not for me. But since I needed a job and fast, I didn't have a choice but to deliver and decorate these flowers to some fashion show .

I AM ALLERGIC TO FLOWERS. Yes. Their pollen is just too much for my nose to inhale. I was once brought to the hospital for looking like a tomato due to my contact with white roses. Gosh. It was embarrassing that I had to sneeze every other second. I was just hoping that my allergy would spare me this time since my last attack happened years back.

When we got to the venue, the crew went working. I took all the precautions I can think of before working. I wore a pair of gloves and a mask that covers my nose and mouth. I even wore a thick sweater just to avoid falling pollen over my skin. Though I'm not sure if it can trigger my allergy. I'M JUST BEING CAREFUL OKAY?

While I was doing a pretty peaceful job, a lady approached us and handed us a plastic of clothes. WHAT THE ARE THOSE....?

 

"These are some cool clothes you need to wear. The press will be coming soon so please prepare!", the lady in corporate attire announced.

 

I opened the plastic and saw the complete opposite of what I'm wearing. A pair of khaki shorts and a sleeveless green shirt with a caption, HIM. WHAT THE HECK? I thought we would just decorate these flowers? NOBODY TOLD ME WE WERE THE ONES WALKING IN THE RUNWAY?!

 

I raised my hand for an objection. "I'm sorry but I'm not a model!"

 

The lady looked at me like she's trying to absorb what I said.

 

"Uhm, I think you got it all wrong. You just have to wear those for press pics. You won't be one of the models."

 

OH. RIGHT.

Though there some teasing giggles from my work-mates, I just ignored them. Tch. It's not my fault that they weren't clearing things up!

After we all changed our outfits, we went back to work. They were practically pressuring us to take double time in arranging these ty plants around the runway. I started feeling itchy and I knew my attacks are here to get me.

 

"HA-CHOO!!!!"

 

Thanks for my big nose that I blew up the flowers I was arranging. It scattered to the cement floor that all the working people with corporate attires stared at me like I was the most sinful man on earth for sneezing.

I took a bow immediately to express how sorry I was. I was beginning to retrieve the flowers on the ground when series of my  allergies butted in.

 

"HA-CHOOO!!!!"

 

I don't know how many I blurted out but it seems like there were men in black ready to take me out of the venue. They reached for my arm and was about to drag me when I stopped them.

 

"Excuse me for a while. Please give me a chance!!!", I mercifully pleaded.

 

"I'm sorry but your rhinitis is messing up the arrangement. We need to you out right now!"

 

OH CRAP.

I. MUST. NOT. BE. FIRED.

DAMI NOONA WILL KILL ME!

 

"I...I have my medicine! Please! Just-----just a moment!"

 

                                                                

 

I tried wiggling from their grasp and rushed to the nearest washroom I saw. I just needed to have some space, that's all. Plus, I don't really have the money for buying my meds right now. I'm broke and this ty job is digging my own grave.

I went to a cubicle for a while to pee. There was this man on my side but I knew better than to look at him. He may recognized me and kick my out of this place. Tch. Not good.

 

-----------------------

TOP P.O.V

 

After calling my reserved assistant (Yes, I have 20 of them in case I get the current fired), he managed to call the floral team to get their asses in my fashion show right now. They have been an hour late and punctuality is everything for me. If we're not that in a rush, I would cancel all the reservations we had for that unprofessional flower shop.

Since I was stressed out a bit, I decided to just stay in my limo. I changed my tux as well and drank a glass of wine. Now this, is life.

 

                                                                         

 

When I peeked out on my window, I saw that a crew of about 20 people came in with flower pots on their hands. FINALLY, they came! I almost got tempted to torn all those flower arrangements because of their late asses. Tch. After I saw them changing their clothes, I got relieved since the press is about to come any minute now. HA. They will see how 'charitable' and brilliant I am for sponsoring my teams' clothes.

 

Just then, my new assistant came knocking on my window. "SIR! The press are all lining up on the entrance. You should prepare now."

"Got it. Where's the washroom by the way?"

 

I didn't know why but my simple question got him sweating like waterfalls.

 

"Uhm.....oh! THERE! Just on the right side of the runway, sir!", he finally exclaimed.

 

I shooed him away as I made my way to the washroom. I just have to satisfy my bladder and I'm good to go! When I came there, there was already someone inside looking like he's about to blow from too much redness. He was wearing the sponsored clothes I gave out and I knew he was part of the crew. I just didn't bother to look further and I went on to business.

While I was heavenly peeing, my worst nightmare came into the picture.

 

"HA-CHOOOO!!!!!"

 

I thought I was going to faint out from disgust but I stood there, speechless but mentally ready to kill the person beside me.

ING . HE SNEEZED ON MY !!!!!

I SWEAR I COULD FEEL THE DRIPS OF HIS MICROBES ON MY SPITTING COBRA WHEN HE TURNED HIS HEAD AND RELEASED HIS EXPLOSIVE PARTICLES FROM HIS NOSE AND MOUTH.

He stared at me with horror and I too, did the same.

 

                                     

 

"OH . . I AM SORRY! I DIDN'T-----I DIDN'T MEAN IT------"

 

But before he could finish, he already exploded some more.

 

"HA-CHOOOO!!!!"

 

DAMN THE MOTHER OF MUCUS.

 

"HOLY-----BEJEEZUS! WHAT THE !!! YOU DIRTY !!!"

 

I didn't even think twice of going inside this closed cubicle and wash my pitiful from the foreign invasion it experienced. I was literally going crazy declaming all the curses I know in every language while the stupid was knocking on the door begging for my forgiveness.

 

"ARGHHH HIDE YOUR SORRY YOU TARD! I'LL GET YOU KILLED!!!!!"

 

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vododoll #1
Chapter 16: Please updateeeee
missbeehave
#2
Chapter 16: Omgomgomg I love you
ur story
the irresistible characters
their 4d-ness
I want to live in ur mind
U r wonderful

Really really
Ur mind
Ur thoughts
Ur humor
Ur sass
Ur beautiful.

Pls talk to me lol
I looooove this.
Im only one mere reader but uve made me ur fan.
This story is just aaaaahhhhhh
Ahhhhhhh
Mazingly hilarious addicting captivating
Ple
P
L
E
A
S
E

Update 1000000 chaps more.

Can I b ur friend?
Lol how Embarassing is this lol
My names bee.

I lovvvve u
missbeehave
#3
Chapter 3: Omg
Im loling hard
missbeehave
#4
Chapter 1: Bahahahahahha!!!
Bahahha hahahahah
Lmaoahahahhahhahhajhaha
O
M
G
Im laffing like an idiot in my room bahahhahha
Ji sneezing on his cobra bahahahhhah
Mother of mucus!!!
Looool
Omg
sarahid #5
pleas update i love your story
Sotbaka #6
Chapter 16: Plz update soon~~~
hobuttlover #7
Chapter 15: these two are seriously just super hilarious! ROFLOL!
llvip59 #8
Chapter 15: Aaaaw xD he using aegyo on jiyong c: n i wonder hiw get sick when he was going to do other stuff o.O oh well now jiyong will have to stat n take care of seunghyun Cx
DoingCrackWithExo
#9
Chapter 15: Omg, t.o.p'a aegyo..how will jiyong resist!
gisela #10
Chapter 14: Chelliee when will you update thisss? I even re-reading it from the start :"). ... Uuuu.... But take your timee I'll wait :D