“Chen?”

“Tao?”

We both stand there, in the doorway, eyeing each other like a vulture would eye its prey.

I feel like he’s about to lunge out at me and rip my face off, so I unconsciously get into a fighting stance, my right foot back, my left in front. I crouch my knees forward a little, so that my centre of gravity is low.

Perfect for when he comes at me, so I can chuck him over my shoulder and slam him to the floor.

Chen holds the doorframe in his hand. He’s about to slam it in my face in anger. Its like my being here is a sin against Chen’s ideal reality. An ideal reality where I’m not with Xiumin.

“Who is it?” Xiumin calls from inside.

“Tao,” I respond, lips pursed. Chen glares at me as Xiumin pushes him out of the doorway, holding a hand out to me. I take it, and he leads me inside, leading me to his side of the room.

There’s a small bed, a desk, cupboard with drawers half open, clothes folded neatly. Finally, a picture of a younger Xiumin with another boy, that sits on a wooden bedside table, that’s more like a plank than anything.

Their room is much more humble than mine and Chanyeol’s.

“What’s going on?” Xiumin asks. I shrug.

“Baekhyun and Chanyeol wanted to spend more time together, so I decided I’d come to see you.”

Xiumin gives me a small smile, and looks across the room to Chen. I give Xiumin a small nod when I’m sure Chen’s not watching us, and Xiumin grins. I whisper one word to him, so he knows my plan.

‘Tonight’.

Chen’s sulking, hand still clenched on the doorframe. His eyes are cast downwards, intently tracing the lines where the floorboards meet each other. They’re squeaky clean, much different from the dirt-covered floorboards in my room.

“Well Tao, you and I can sleep together!” Xiumin announces to the room excitedly, watching as Chen twitches in his place.

“No.”

I tilt my head to the side, watching as events unfold in front of me. Xiumin lets out a gasp of surprise as Chen jumps, running towards Xiumin with outstretched arms.

“What… what are you doing, Chen?” Xiumin squeals in surprise.

Chen wraps his arms around Xiumin’s neck, and I’m left standing there with a smirk on my face.

So I was right after all.

“You can’t sleep with Tao,” Chen whispers, his eyes flickering across to me.

“I won’t let you.”

“And why not?” I ask loudly. Chen hesitates, eyes going from Xiumin to me, back and forth across the room. I giggle, running up to them and hugging them both.

“Chen, you fell for it!” I laugh. Xiumin lets out a shrill laugh, hugging me back.

“I can’t believe it worked!” he exclaims.

Chen just stands there flabbergasted. He runs a confused hand through his hair, and I laugh at him as his left eye twitches.

“What do you mean, I fell for it?” he asks loudly. Xiumin takes his hand and sits him down on the bed.

Before I can join them, Xiumin has wrapped his hands around Chen’s neck, his tongue creeping across Chen’s jawline. Chen lets out a moan of surprise.

“What?” he splutters.

“I like you Chen. More than a friend,” Xiumin tells him with a peck on the cheek.

“I… I didn’t think you liked me back, and when you got with Kris…” Chen’s eyes widen, and I take a seat on his bed, watching as the pair stare at each other lovingly.

“I… I don’t understand…” Chen says in confusion. Xiumin laughs even louder, giving Chen’s back a rub of encouragement.

“Chen, I love you. Ever since that day, I’ve loved you. And now I know you love me too.”

Xiumin looks so happy, and I can’t even fathom how it must feel. Chen smiles at his best friend, a wide grin making its way across his face. His jawline looks so prominent as he grins, and I notice Xiumin squeeze him even closer.

“I… I thought you were joking with that kiss…” Chen whispers.

“I thought you’d never like me like that.”

Xiumin shakes his head and slaps Chen playfully on the arm.

“Chen, you’re so stupid!” Xiumin complains, flicking his tongue out at him.

“I’m the one who thought you couldn’t like me! After that kiss, I thought you’d completely rejected me!”

“I… I was confused!” Chen stumbles over his words, looking down at Xiumin as he runs his teeth across the front of Chen’s shirt.

“What about Tao?” Chen asks. I give him a small smile.

“I was helping Xiumin get you to like him,” I explain calmly, as if they’re not practically making out right in front of me.

“A little jealousy goes a long way.”

Chen chuckles, punching me on the arm.

“You were too realistic!” he growls jokingly. I shrug, stepping towards the door.

“I suppose I’ll leave you two to it,” I say, marching out of the room.

“But now where do I go?” I whisper to myself.

I head down the corridor, weaving my way around students as they head across to their dorm rooms. I almost get shoved into a wall and impaled on a stairwell as I attempt to shove past the juniors.

Soon, I find myself in front of Kai and Kyungsoo’s room. I knock, and realise that there’s no way that they’ll take me in.

I cross the hall, pressing my ear against the door that must lead to Sehun and Luhan’s room. I hear a loud, needy moan and I immediately flinch, shuffling backwards a little.

I don’t even want to know. They’re like rampant addicts, I swear.

I head even further down the corridor, until I find myself in front of the room that belongs to Suho and Lay.

They’re busy practicing music together, Suho singing, Lay dancing, and I know immediately that me being there would be a massive block, and I’m not going to do that to Lay.

There’s nowhere to go.

I shuffle down the corridor, stepping gingerly over someone’s spilt bubble tea and I groan as someone kicks a soccer ball, narrowly missing my head.

I’m back by my own dorm room, but I know that I can’t go in, so I just sit there, head between my hands.

I don’t know what to do.

I’m happy that Chen and Xiumin are together, really I am. But maybe I was putting Xiumin in my life as a substitute for something else.

A substitute for Kris.

I don’t even bother knocking on my own door. Instead, I pull my knees towards my chest, dropping my books to the floor beside me. I pile all of my textbooks and exercise books up, until they’re a somewhat passable pillow.

It’s hardly comfortable.

I lie my back down across the floor, the corridors becoming quiet with each passing second. Curfew’s in a few minutes, and I know I’ll most likely get a detention for being out of my room late. But, I can’t exactly go in, can I?

I shut my eyes, clawing at the floor before me as I roll around, trying to find a comfortable position. I know my back’s going to hurt tomorrow morning, and there’ll be no conceivable way for me to concentrate through class.

Once I’ve found a passable position, I sigh, stilling myself.

This will have to do.

“Uh…”

I squint an eye open, letting out a gasp of surprise as I look at the figure before me.

Tall, blonde, attractive. That familiar chiseled face, that familiar softness in his eyes.

“Kris?”

“Uh… Tao… Chen called me and told me about you and Xiumin,” Kris says in his obscenely y deep voice.

“Thanks for helping Chen out, they’re both really happy now.”

I give Kris a small nod, going back to shutting my eyes.

“Uh… what are you doing on the floor?” Kris asks. I shrug.

“Baekhyun’s in with Chanyeol tonight, so I got kicked out,” I explain, eyes still closed.

“So you’re sleeping in the corridor?” Kris asks. I nod.

“It doesn’t look comfortable…” Kris whispers. I nod again.

“It isn’t really,” I tell him in a growl. I hear a gulp.

“I… I’m by myself now, but there’s two beds in my room still,” Kris mumbles.

“You… er… Tao, you can take the other bed in my room, it’ll be better for you I mean…”

I glance up at him, hoping that the dim lighting will hide my blush.

“Are you sure?” I manage to choke out.

“I'm sure.”