A/N: I'm spoiling you, guys! Two chapters in one week! 

That's for not updating for such a long time.

Enjoy~ 

- Onew POV -

After wrapping up my photoshoot, I excuse myself and leave the site with all the cameras. Our manager, who has accompanied me to the shoot, tries to stop me, telling me it is dangerous for me (an idol) to go out without manager or bodyguard. But at this moment I have to be alone. I don’t want to see anyone, not a manager, not a bodyguard, not even a friend. With pleading eyes, I ask our manager to leave me alone for a while and I tell him that he can go home without worrying about me, that I will get back to the dorm – which is located only a few blocks away from the shoot – on foot.

When the manager gives in with an almost imperceptible nod, I slowly walk in the direction of the river bank, pulling my hood over my head and putting my hands in my pockets. The sun is trying its best to drive away the grey snow clouds and warm the city with her yellow and orange rays. A cold winter breeze brushes my cheeks. My breath makes tiny white clouds when it hits the cold winter air. Pulling the dark grey scarf higher over my cold nose, I try to cover my face a little more. I drag my feet along the darkening streets until I arrive at the Han river. I sit down on a little bench that is hidden between two small bushes in the deserted part of the park.

At this time I hate being an idol as I don’t want to attract any attention. If fans would find out that I am here and they would see me like this, they would be utterly shocked. At this moment I am not the Onew they all see on television or on stage. At this moment I am not the clumsy, goofy man they all know. At this moment I am just Lee Jinki, a confused, frustrated and heartbroken man, who has no idea how he should handle the situation. I am not only confused and frustrated, but also terribly afraid… afraid that I am not handling the situation correctly, that I am treating my friends and girlfriend so wrongly that nothing can be done to restore our bonds.

When I am sitting on the bench, my cell phone suddenly starts to vibrate. I take the device out of my pocket, hoping it will be someone else than the last 10 calls I received. But of course it is the same person. My heart breaks into thousand little pieces when I see the smiling girl on the picture. A tiny voice inside my head urges me to pick up and listen to her explanations, but another part of me tells me I have to stay strong. I listen to the second voice and turn off the phone before putting it back in my pocket. At this moment I don’t feel like listening to her lies, and that is all what she will tell, lies. A deep sigh escapes my lips as I close my eyes for a second, trying to control all the feelings that are boiling inside of me.

After a while I am sick and tired of sitting on the bench, so I decide to get up before my is stuck frozen on the wood.  I start walking around and wander on the river bank, taking in my surroundings; the shimmering water of the river, the city noises in the background and the smell of wet street stones after the fresh snowfall of this morning. I am hoping that the familiar feeling of the city of Seoul will drive away my frustrations and fears, but that is the thing about fear… you can run away from it or pretend it doesn’t exist, but one point or another it will catch up with you. And catching up with me, it does when I am suddenly standing in front one of the old trees in the park. I hesitate at first, but in the end my feet drag me to the side of the trunk. I crouch down next to the old tree as tears start to flow once more. Images that were once linked to happiness, now tear apart my heart; the happy smile on our first date to the chicken restaurant, the sparkling in her eyes every time we secretly entwined our fingers, the blush on her cheeks after the first kiss that we shared underneath the leaves of this old tree.

More than an hour passes as I absentmindedly wander around the park, along the river. Though the winter breeze and the silent peace of the nature helped my body to relax, my attempts to relax my mind are fruitless. So still frustrated, confused and afraid as I was when I arrived at the park, I leave and head back home.

~…~

As I enter the dorm after my walk in the park, someone is crying again. The small sobs, unfortunately, sound all too familiar to my ears. I quickly take off my shoes and run to the living room, wanting to wrap my arms around the fragile figure of the broken, crying boy so desperately. But when I take in the situation in front of my eyes, my feet freeze onto the floor, every cell of my body filling with shock and anger. Key is sitting on one of the couches, his elbows resting on his knees and his head in his hands. His entire body is trembling as he tries to muffle his sobs. Taemin is sitting next to the crying boy, soothingly the other’s back. But that’s not what has shocked me, the two other figures present are what froze me on the spot. The girl who broke my heart and the singer whom Key loved with his entire body are sitting side by side on the other couch in our dorm’s living room. The girl is sheepishly looking at her hands in her lap, while the singer has placed his hand on Key’s thigh in a soothing manner. They all look up in surprise when I enter the door, slamming the door behind my back.

“Onew-ah!” “Hyung!” They all call me in unison.

“What are they doing here?” I ask, directing the question to Key and Taemin as I’m not feeling like talking to the two other people present.

“Explaining the situation,” Taemin answers, seriousness dripping in his voice.

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A/N: Another cliffhanger, thanks Taemin (bad boy! ㅋㅋㅋ)!

Love ya’ll and don’t forget to comment <3