"Hyung, what are you humming?" Kyungsan asked as he tried balancing on the chair to reach a glass cup on the top shelf. He was on his tippy toes, struggling to reach with his short arms. Hoya was busy looking through some papers from work to pay attention.

"Nothing. Just a tune." He replied without looking up to check on his brother.

"I like that tune. Noona hums that tune too. Did you hear it from her?" He asked.

"Yeah. You can say that."

A loud shattering sound broke Hoya's attention away from the work and towards the kitchen where a glass cup laid shattered into a hundred small pieces. His eyes widen in shock before moving to Kyungsan who stood there, eyes in tears.

"Hyung, I'm sorry." He apologized as fat tears spilled down his cheeks and a pout lit across his face. And for a second there Hoya saw the image of JiAh spin back into his mind, rampaging through his every thought. He slowly stood up and walked over to the kitchen, avoiding the glass shards. He pulled Kyungsan into his arms and carried the child to the living room where he placed him on the couch.

"Its fine. It was an accident. Accidents happen." Hoya spoke wiping away the tears falling from Kyungsan's eyes.

"Hyung, you're not mad?" He asked softly with his head hung low. Hoya shook his head indicating a no. Why would he be mad it was an accident after all. In fact it was his fault, he should had been paying attention to Kyungsan. Although Kyungsan acted far older than he actually was, Hoya had to remember Kyungsan was still an eight years old child.

"But hyung, why were you mad at noona then?" The words felt like knives stabbing him, stabbing every inch of his body. Words killed. They were killing him.

Did JiAh tell him? Did she tell Kyungsan of all the times he yelled at her, abuse her, hurt her?

And as if he could read his mind, Kyungsan replied, "Noona didn't tell me. I figured it out on my own." He answered. Hoya was frozen in his spot for a few seconds there. Was that a good thing or bad thing?

"Hyung, let's clean up the mess." Kyungsan suggested, and they both knew it was more than broken glass that needed mending. The question was where to start?

"She really did raise you well didn't she?"
--

Life wasn't like it was in the movies. The characters would magically change in the middle of the night and decide to do better, be better. But life wasn't like that. It took a long time and a lot of effort before someone can even make the smallest step into changing. Change wasn't the three minute transformation Hollywood portrayed it as. If only it was that easy...

Hoya for one, had no idea where to begin. It was like spinning in a circle that met no end and had no beginning.

"How about we list what is wrong with you hyung?" Kyungsan suggested as he scribbled on the paper in front of him with a purple marker. Hoya chuckled, Kyungsan was the teacher and he was the student. It was an odd site, yet fitting for the situation.

"That's a long list."

"You're right. I don't like lists."

"Why?" Hoya probed.

"Because they're different than what I'm used it. Different from noona." Kyungsan replied.

"How so?"

"Because noona was anything but a list. She was a mess, a crazy, disturbed, beautiful mess. There was no order to her, no lined by lined formation. Just a cuddle of words that formed something amazing." Kyungsan replied. His words wise beyond his years.

"Am I like noona?" Hoya asked, it was a question intended more to himself than it was for Kyungsan.

"You're exactly like her. You're scare, like her. You're horrible at translating your emotions through, like her. You bottle everything up, like her. You're stupid, like her-"

"Watch your language." Hoya snapped jokingly.

"And then there's that. That charm, you have that charm, just like noona."

"Hyung, is being like noona or good thing or bad thing?"

--

"And hyung read me the book. Noona its a good book. I'm glad you suggested it." Kyungsan said while sitting next to JiAh. The two were in one of the play rooms at the orphanage. Hoya would drop Kyungsan off once in a while. Kyungsan wanted to visit, he was used to the orphanage. It was his first home.

Hoya had to return to work leaving Kyungsan there for a few hours. JiAh just happened to stopped by that day. She never ran into Hoya. The two never crossed paths. Kyungsan didn't say anything to Hoya. And no one else did. It was that sort of thing where the whole universe knew what was going on, except for that one oblivious person that everybody just wanted to go up to and slap the truth into their face.

"Noona, why don't you go back to hyung?" Kyungsan asked. JiAh wasn't prepared to answer this question. She knew whatever her answer would be, Kyungsan would understand. He always did.

"Because we've gone through too much for us to pretend like we used to. Let's let the past be the past." She answered honestly. Her answers were always honest. JiAh wasn't one to lie. She was blunt, too blunt for her own good.

"I don't want to hurt him anymore." She mumbled under her breath. Kyungsan heard.

"Noona, I think you're hurting him right now."