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{STORY LINK}

Title: 9/10

An interesting title. I thought that it fit the theme well, and it also attracted me to your story. But i believe 'back', 'your', and 'smile' should be capitalized. You don't capitalize words that are three or less letters. Also those words are important also, so it would be better if you capitalize them. Or at lease capitalize 'smile'. It also made me curious as to WHY they needed to bring back her smile, so it made me think and wonder what your story was going to be about.

Foreword: 11/15

It was bit boring for me to read. When i read your description i just skimmed thorough it and nothing really caught my attention. There was also some grammatical errors which also took away the appeal of your story. It did an ok job of describing your story, but i just got bored of her sad life. Hm, for your forward you did a character profile. I always like to improve my writing, and have been reading some helpul hints on writing fanfictions. Some say you shouldn't have them, and that they take away from your story. Why? Well it seems to the readers that you can't write good characters, and that you need to tell them what your characters are like instead of building up the character's personality during the story. Some say that you can have them, but they recommend that you don't. I can see that it's a nice thing to add, but it is also ok just to have their name, picture, ect, and not add their personality. But once again, im not so sure about this, so you can ignore my ramblings.

Overall Look: 4/5

Nice! Good job choosing the font and size. Its pretty, doesn't hurt my eyes, and the size isn't too big. The poster was pretty also! The pictures seemed to fit the theme also. Really pretty, and well done!

Grammar: 21/30

You had quite a few mistakes. I suggest you re-read your chapters, and make sure they make sense to you. Here are some things that i caught and suggest you fix. Its not all of them, just a few. OR = original, CR = correct

OR: She was busy of seeing the happiness of other people outside, without noticing that the door was open.

CR: She was busy seening the happiness of other people outside, without noticing that the door was open.

OR: She lifted up her head to see the board with proud.

CR: She lifted up her head to see the board with proudness.

Here i'm not sure what you were trying to write, so i just fixed it the way i thought would make some sense.

OR: All of them admired with their beauty espectially Suzy.

CR: Everyone admired their beauty, especially Suzy.

OR: Ji-Eun never felt the feelings of lonely, since she's already used of being alone.

CR: Ji-Eun never felt lonely, since she's already used to being alone.

OR: You were just shock.

CR: You were just shocked.

OR: Everyone have their own weakness

CR: Everyone has their own weakness

OR: I'm major in music,

CR: I'm a major in music,

Spelling:  17/20

You made some spelling errors, but they weren't that bad.It was just missing a letter or two. But make sure you pay attention to what your writing, and fix your mistakes. OR = original, CR = correct.

OR: collge's

CR: collage's

OR: plus ver noisy

CR: plus very noisy

OR: espectially

CR: especially

OR: woth

CR: with

Flow: 12/15

It wasn't that bad. It was at a good pace, and didn't seem to go by that fast. I suggest you work on your word choices. I felt awkward reading some parts because the words that you used was a bad choice. You also had a variety of sentence lengths, so i didn't get bored of reading all short sentences, or all long sentences.

Originality: 4/5

I love dream high! Such a good drama! I haven't read a story like this, but some similar. Also it seemed almost like the real dream high. But overall i liked it!

Total: 75/100

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Reviewed by: StarlightTango

(a note from her~So Jonghyun is her cousin? But he likes her romantically? I didn't take anything off about this, but isn't it a bit weird? But weird is good also~ Just my last thoughts! Keep up the good work!) 

got any questions? pm us! remember to credit us in the foreword!