What Hurts the Most
My Adorable Bodyguard
“Kyuhyun.” Ryeowook called Kyuhyun’s name softly as he walked towards the younger. Yesung stood frozen on his spot as he saw the angry look that Kyuhyun is giving him, while Sungmin can only watched in confusion. Nobody seemed to mind what he said a while ago. He can feel the tension going around the three, and he started to wonder what is happening.
“How dare you come here and showed your self to me after what you had done? And don’t you dare call my name again!” Kyuhyun growled making Ryeowook flinched and Sungmin’s eyes widened in surprise.
“Kyuhyun, I’m sorry. Please allow me to explain everything to you.” Ryeowook pleaded.
“What for? Huh?”
“Kyu, please-“
“Don’t call me in that name again!” Kyuhyun shouted angrily before dashing out of the room. Ryeowook immediately followed him, leaving a still dazed and confused Sungmin.
“W-what happened just now? Care to tell me, hyung?” Sungmin asked his brother after seeing Kyuhyun and Ryeowook left.
“Kyuhyun is Ryeowook’s first love.” Yesung simply answered and Sungmin thought that he had heard it wrong. “I hope everything will turn out right between them.” Yesung continued before glancing at his brother. “By the way, why is Kyuhyun here in your office?”
Instead of answering Yesung, Sungmin hurriedly went out of his office and decided to follow Kyuhyun. Ryeowook had already told him the reason why he left Seoul with his brother. He felt sad and hurt for what happened to Ryeowook and his first love.
After knowing that his brother and Ryeowook wanted to find that guy and asked for his forgiveness and make him know the truth, Sungmin had the urge to find that guy for them. But after knowing that it was Kyuhyun, he wanted to make things right even if he’ll gut hurt in the end. He knows the reason why Kyuhyun hated his father before, why the younger became rebellious, why he was so cold. He knew that it was because of what happened to his first love. But he never thought that it was Ryeowook. Why does fate had to play with them? Kyuhyun loves him, but the way he acted towards Ryeowook makes Sungmin think that the younger had not yet gotten over with his past, unlike him. Kyuhyun should know the truth and he’s going to find him and give him comfort.
~*~*~*~*~
“Kyuhyun! Wait!” Ryeowook shouted behind Kyuhyun’s back. Kyuhyun kept on ignoring him and continue to walk in a fast pace going to the parking lot. Luckily, there were no people on that place when Ryeowook shouted again. “Please listen to me! I never wanted to leave you. What I said to you on that night when I broke up with you were all lies. I love you, Kyuhyun! I never cheated on you while we are together! Please believe me.”
Kyuhyun stopped walking, making Ryeowook stood behind him anxiously. “Do you think that by telling me those will make me forgive you?” Kyuhyun turned towards Ryeowook and grabbed both of his shoulders harshly. “You left me when I needed you so badly! You don’t know how much pain I have to go through after you told me that you and Yesung are together. I love you, Ryeowook! I was even willing to sacrifice everything and give my life to you because that’s how much I love you. But you left me. You ing left me for that bastard!”
Ryeowook bit his lips to prevent the tears from falling down his eyes. He can see the rage in Kyuhyun’s eyes and he wanted to calm him in a way that he made him calm down before. If only he can turn back the time and never left Kyuhyun. If only he he can hug the younger again in his arms and tell him how sorry he is and that everything is okay. But this is not the past anymore. Everything had changed, including his feelings towards the younger.
“Why don’t you say anything? You wanted to talk to me right? Now talk!”
“I’m sorry.” Ryeowook whispered.
“Nonsense!” Kyuhyun hissed in anger.
“Kyuhyun, I will not expect you to forgive me and Yesung. I just want you to know the truth.”
Kyuhyun pushed Ryeowook towards the wall, earning a yelp from the latter. “I don’t want to hear anything. All I wanted to know from you is if you honestly love me, if you never cheated on me when we are still together.”
Ryeowook stared at Kyuhyun’s eyes. He missed those pair of enticing orbs, how they seemed to hypnotize him before making him weak on his knees whenever they stared at him. “I had been true to you from the start.” He said softly. “I never loved you for your wealth and for everything that you have. I had loved you because you are you. You are Cho Kyuhyun, the brat that I had fallen in love with. I had never cheated on you, please believe me. Yesung has got nothing to do with our breakup. I was the one who used him to pretend to be my lover so I can break up with you. I don’t want to be a hindrance to your dreams that’s why I decided to do that. I am really sorry. I wanted to tell you that I and Yesung are-“ Kyuhyun hushed him and put his index finger at Ryeowook’s lips to stop him. He saw the look in Kyuhyun’s eyes, sadness, doubt, and most of all longing.
“That’s all I wanted to hear.” Kyuhyun said before lowering his face towards Ryeowook and kissing those lips that he had missed and longed to taste for so long. Reyowook’s eyes widened in surprise.
“I miss you.” Kyuhyun whispered before taking Ryeowook’s lips again. This is wrong. He wanted to push Kyuhyun’s face away from his and stopped the kiss, but if this will make Kyuhyun feel better then he’ll allow it. He promised himself that this will be the last kiss that they will be sharing. He closed his eyes and began to savor the taste of Kyuhyun’s lips against his own.
Unknown to them, Sungmin had heard and saw everything. A lone tear escape his eyes as he saw how Kyuhyun looks at Ryeowook before kissing him. It hit him hard and fast, making him feel like his heart is currently being torn into pieces. Does Kyuhyun really loves him? Did the younger just used him to forget about Ryeowook? He don’t want to doubt about Kyuhyun’s love for him. But what he’s seeing now makes him doubt the younger. Is he just some kind of a third-wheeler in Kyuhyun’s life? He don’t want that. Is he really that easy to give in to Kyuhyun? It took him a year to finally accept that Sunny was gone, and now, he’s experiencing the same kind of heartache while seeing the man that he learned to love kissing another person. What will Yesung do if he saw them kissing? He was glad his brother is not around. He wiped his tears before walking away from the scene. He needed to be somewhere else right now and ease the suffocating feeling in his chest.
Sungmin kept on walking with no fixed destination on his mind. He only allowed his feet to take him anywhere since he badly needed it. Rain gently pours down on him and he didn’t mind it at all. He kept his gaze lowered as tears continuously fall down his eyes. Sungmin suddenly felt that the rain stopped puring down on his body and he lifted his gaze only to be welcomed by Yunho’s warm smile while holding an umbrella for them against the rain.
“You’ll get sick if you continue to walk without protection under the rain like this.”
“Y-Yunho.” Sungmin choked and he tried to act strong in front of his best friend but his shield broke down when the latter hugged him, allowing him to cry harder on Yunho’s chest.
Yunho didn’t say anything as he let Sungmin cry against his chest. He don’t know what happened, but he’s willing to stay at Sungmin’s side and give him comfort. He don’t know why he suddenly decided to take a walk under the rain a while ago, but now he’s glad he did. His heart breaks seeing Sungmin like this. If this is Kyuhyun’s doing, that brat will definitely feel his wrath.
“Sungmin, I’ll take you home.” Yunho whispered when he felt that Sungmin had finally calmed down from crying.
Sungmin shook his head. Last thing he wanted to do right now is to go back to his apartment and be welcomed with memories he had with Kyuhyun on his bed. He is not yet ready to face Ryeowook and his brother. It will just hurt him. Who knows what he can do to Ryeowook for cheating on his brother, or for himself? He really don’t know. “C-can I stay at your place for awhile?” He asked, feeling his throat become dry.
Yunho furrowed his brows before nodding his head and grabbing Sungmin’s hand. He knows that if Sungmin is not feeling good, he’ll head towards his own house and never asked for his help before. But now, Sungmin really seemed so broken and he wanted to know why.
When they arrived at Yunho’s house, Sungmin walked lifelessly towards the couch. Yunho grabbed a towel and dry clothes for Sungmin to wear. “Go to the bathroom and change first. We’ll talk after that.” He instructed and Sungmin went towards the bathroom without giving him any glance at all. “I’m always here, Sungmin. Always loving you from afar.” Yunho whispered to himself.
~*~*~*~*~
Yesung was pacing back and forth while holding his phone. He tried calling Sungmin how many times, but his brother is not answering at all. It was past midnight and he can’t help but worry a lot. He didn’t see him come back to his office that morning, and Ryeowook is even avoiding him. He then dialled a number and almost burst out in anger when the other line answered.
“Where in the hell is my brother? Don’t tell me you had sent him again in a dangerous mission! I will really kill you this time, Kim Hyun Joong!”
“Eh? Who’s this?” The other line answered annoyingly.
“Don’t you ‘who’s this?’ me! You know pretty well who I am.”
“Yesung?” The other line asked.
“Yes! Now where is my brother?”
“Geez. Yesung, will you calm down? I don’t even know what mission you are talking about. I didn’t see Sungmin today.”
“Are you telling me the truth?” Yesung asked suspiciously.
“Of course I am. Why don’t you call Yunho? Maybe he’s with him.”
“Oh! Why didn’t I think of that?”
“Because you are still the ever protective brother of Sungmin.” Hyun Joong chuckled.
“Shut up! I just don’t want his life to be put in danger again. He’s the only family I have. And I can feel that you are up into something not good. I know you, Hyun Joong.”
Hyun Joong chuckled again. “You really know me, but it’s up to you to find out what I am currently planning. I will sleep now and you start calling Yunho.”
~*~*~*~*~
Yunho stared at Sungmin’s sleeping face. He gently brushed the strands of hair that’s covering Sungmin’s eyelids. He wanted to talk to Sungmin after he had taken a shower, but the latter remained quiet the whole day. He felt frustrated, but he will wait until Sungmin is ready to tell him what really happened. His phone suddenly vibrated in his jeans and he grabbed it before walking out of the room to answer the call.
“Hello?”
“Yunho, this is Yesung.” The other line answered.
“Yesung hyung?” Yunho asked in disbelief. “When did you arrive? Does Sungmin know you are here in Seoul?”
“I arrived two days ago, and yes, Sungmin knows I am here. I wanted to ask if he’s with you right now. I am really worried about him after what happened in his office this morning. He did not even come back.” Yesung replied worriedly.
“Yes, hyung. He’s currently sleeping.” Yunho replied.
“Thank God.” Yesung muttered in relief.
“Ahm…. Hyung? Can I ask you what happened in his office this morning?” Yunho asked curiously.
“Me and Ryeowook are actually planning to surprise him at his office, but Kyuhyun was there. And… Yeah… Ahm…. Actually, Ryeowook and Kyuhyun had some misunderstandings in the past. I’m sorry but I felt awkward telling you this.”
“It’s okay, hyung. I hope they are going to fix that misunderstanding.” Yunho replied as he still didn’t know what really happened.
“Y-yes… I really hope so. I’ll sleep now. Tell Sungmin to call me when he wakes up.” Yesung said before ending the call.
Yunho went back to his room and slowly lay down beside Sungmin. He carefully examined Sungmin’s face and notice a tear stain in the latter’s cheek. He gently caressed it before kissing Sungmin’s forehead. “I wonder what made you cry hard today. I can’t stand seeing you so down like that. It breaks my heart. Is it because of Kyuhyun? Tell me, Sungmin. I am willing to listen even if it hurts. Please trust me. I realy love you.” Yunho whispered before closing his eyes.
~*~*~*~*~
It’s been a week and Sungmin was back into his self again. He tried to forget and be strong in front of other people. He’s back again to the time where he was still mourning over Sunny, only this time he’s not mourning anymore, but currently trying to heal his heart. He heard what Yunho told him and he can’t help but feel pity for his best friend. How he wanted to fall in love with Yunho too, but he can’t. He won’t do something like what Kyuhyun had done to him. He won’t use other people just to mend his aching heart. He won’t even use Yunho to pretend as his lover like what Ryeowook had done to his brother. He hated Ryeowook for using his brother, for cheating on him, and for responding to Kyuhyun’s kiss. He can’t looked at Ryeowook the same way like before whenever they see each other. He sometimes hoped that Kyuhyun would call or visit him and would apologize or say goodbye to him, but none of it happened.
“Hey! I brought you something.” Yunho called to him from the door while hiding something behind his back.
“What is it this time?” Sungmin asked as he tried to sound lively.
“Tada!” Yunho handed him a pink tulip.
”I’m not a girl. Why are you even giving me that?” Sungmin asked in amusement.
“Because I care.” Yunho replied while smiling warmly. He paused when he saw Sungmin suddenly avoided his gaze. “That’s the meaning.”
“Huh?” Sungmin looked at him questioningly.
“This pink tulip means I care.”
“T-thank you, Yunho.” Sungmin muttered.
“Anytime for you. By the way, Mr. Cho is having a party tomorrow night. Something like farewell party, or something.” Yunho sat on a chair as he examined Sungmin’s reaction.
“You go, Yunho. I won’t be part of that.” Sungmin said before returning back to his work.
“I didn’t tell you that we are invited. Actually, we are there to do some surveillance. Who knows if the person we’re looking for is there, ready to kill and ruin the party. It’s gonna be full of action. I know you love action.”
“S-sure. I’ll be there then.” Sungmin stuttered.
There was a moment of silence before Yunho suddenly asked him. “Sungmin, what happened on the day that I had found you walking under the rain?”
“I… I just had some mental breakdown. You know due to stress and other stuff.” Sungmin replied trying to sound convincing, but Yunho didn’t believe him.
“Kyuhyun is one of those stuff, am I right?”
“Yunho, if you don’t have anything else to say just leave me alone and go back to work.”
“I know you are the kind who will not let what you truly feels show. You tried to act strong and you know how good I can see through you. I’m just here ready to listen, you know I’ve always been even though how many times you tried pushing me away. Please try to open up to me again, Sungmin. Don’t treat me like a stranger. I miss the way we were before.” Yunho replied in a sad tone. “I love you, but that doesn’t mean that you should return it. I am contented having you around me.”
“I’m sorry, Yunho,” Sungmin whispered.
“Don’t be. I’ll leave you now. See you tomorrow.” Yunho said before heading towards the door. His expression suddenly changed when he saw Kyuhyun standing outside the office. “What are you doing here?”
“None of your business.” Kyuhyun replied trying to get pass Yunho.
“You always say that. But you know that everything about Sungmin is part of my business, especially after seeing him cry and get soaked in the rain.”
Kyuhyun looked at him. “What? Why did he cry?”
“I don’t know. Maybe you know the real reason.”
“Let me through. I’ll go and talk to him.” Kyuhyun muttered. Yunho let him walked towards Sungmin’s office to his relief.
“I’m watching you, Cho Kyuhyun.” Kyuhyun heard Yunho said to him.
~*~*~*~*~
There was a soft knock on the door before Sungmin opened it. His heart suddenly start jumping inside his chest when he saw Kyuhyun. The younger immediately enveloped him in a tight hug, and Sungmin tried to break free.
“Let me hold hold you one last time.” Sungmin heard Kyuhyun whispered. He wanted to cry as he heard Kyuhyun say those words to him. What does he mean? Is he really going to leave him?
“I only found out that you are Yesung’s brother a couple of days ago. I hated him for stealing Ryeowook away from me. But now, I can assure you that I am not hating him anymore since Ryeowook came back to me.”
Sungmin’s eyes were filled with tears and he allowed them to fall down his cheeks. Ryeowook and Kyuhyun are back together? What about Yesung? What about him? Why is he even not pushing Kyuhyun away?
“I’m… I’m glad.” Sungmin whispered while biting his lower lip to prevent a sob from escaping. “What else do y-you want to say?”
“I am sorry. I really am. I thought I am completely over him. But-“
“What am I to you?” Sungmin asked in a broken voice. He pushed Kyuhyun away from him and the latter tried to hold his hand. Sungmin walked towards his desk and face his back towards Kyuhyun. “Ryeowook and Yesung hyung are married. My brother sacrificed a lot just to be with him. He even pretended to be Ryeowook’s lover. I even don’t know if he’s still using my brother until now.”
“What did you say? Yesung and Ryeowook are-“
“Yes they are married already. Ryeowook didn’t tell you?” Sungmin asked trying to sound sarcastic.
“You are lying, Sungmin. Tell me you are just kidding me.”
“Why don’t you asked Ryeowook?”
“Why are you telling me this? Are you that really dense not to understand that I love Ryeowook?” Kyuhyun asked him angrily.
“Dense? Wow! You are unbelievable, Cho Kyuhyun.” Sungmin yelled in anger. “I understand everything! I ing understand all of it! I understand now that you only used me to forget about him! I clearly understood that you and Ryeowook used me and my brother in your drama. I can’t believe how I got easily tricked by you. I love you but I guess I had fallen in love with the wrong person.”
“Used you? I never used you, Sungmin.” Kyuhyun retorted back.
“Really? Tell me the truth, Kyuhyun. Did you really love me? Or am I just your playmate in bed?”
Kyuhyun was taken aback by Sungmin’s question. He was supposed to tell Sungmin to give him some time to make up his mind about Ryeowook. He don’t know what will be the right words he will say to Sungmin. He wanted to hug him again, calm him, and tell him everything he needed to know but this is not the right time. He needed to be clear from his past. He didn’t mean to tell those words to Sungmin. He wanted to take it back as he saw the tears fell from Sungmin’s eyes while waiting for his reply.
“I understand.” Sungmin whispered before wiping his tears with the back of his hands. Realizing that Kyuhyun does not have any plans in answering him, he decided to end it right now. He can hear how his heart break in his chest as he gathered enough courage to say the things he wanted to tell to Kyuhyun.
“I understand that you still love him and I cannot compare to him. I am letting you go now, Kyuhyun. Don’t worry I will not chase after you. Please go now.” Sungmin said before staring outside his office’s window. After a long moment of silence, Kyuhyun had finally decided to leave. And as soon as he heard the door closed, he let himself fall on the floor, releasing all of the hurtful emotions he’s feeling on his chest. He suddenly felt strong arms wrapped around him comfortingly.
“I’m here, Sungmin. I’m here for you. Shh.” Yunho whispered soothingly while kissing Sungmin’s hair.
“It hurts. W-why does it h-have to h-hurt like this all the time?” Sungmin asked between sobs.
-------------------
(A/N) Failed angst....
btw, this is going to end soon :(
I was actually planning to make the ending a tragic one....
but since I never expected this piece of crap to be liked by a lot of you, I'm having second thoughts ^^
I'm gonna miss this and all of your wonderful comments.....
I am glad that through this, I was able to gain some friends here....thanks guys!Saranghae~~^^
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