Oh my God.

That was the only coherent thought going through Byunghun's mind as he left the classroom. He'd hung back, not wanting to try his luck. He was already awed by the thought of what had happened. He already suspected that he might've imagined it all; it was simply too good to be true, in his eyes. He was worried that if he left at the same time as them, he might come across as desperate and then they would pretend today had never happened. Although to be fair, Byunghun already expected them to do just that.

To Byunghun, there was one group of students that simply defined cool at university. No one could compare to them; these guys were in a world of their own. They were what made university bearable for Byunghun; watching them. His mind was always filled with fanciful images of what it'd be like to be a part of that; to be one of them.

And today, one of them had just spoken to him!

The one and only Lee Chanhee had spoken to him!

Only two of the members of their little group actually attended university, the others all being in high school, judging by the uniforms Byunghun would see them wear whenever he would spy them around the campus. They'd probably be coming here, joining their friends, any year now. But that only made their little group seem more exclusive.

He had been lucky enough to share a couple of classes with both CAP and Chanhee over the last year, but they'd never so much as crossed eyes, let alone spoke. From the very first moment Byunghun had laid eyes on the pair he'd admired them.

Well, to be precise, he'd always admired CAP more than Chanhee. CAP had it all. CAP had everything that Byunghun didn't, so he looked up to him. He was laid back, and spent most of his time sleeping. He never paid any attention in class, and yet his grades never seemed to suffer for it. But he also had the body most guys would kill for. He'd seen him, playing sports with some of his friends on one of the university ovals during a break. He knew CAP must put a lot of time into his body.

Byunghun's own body always seemed to remain skinny and pale, no matter what he tried to do about it. His body refused to build up muscle, leaving him scrawny for his age. He couldn't say that he'd found that to be very appealing to anyone, from his experience. Then, where CAP had a nice tanned, hue to his skin, Byunghun's complexion was pale, always erupting in a dark burn when he tried to tan it, only for the new skin to come up paler than ever.

But CAP's laid back confidence and intimidating physical presence weren't the first things that had caught Byunghun's eye about the other teen. There was one thing he'd noticed , that he envied even more than all of those things put together, that were the reason he saw CAP and all of his friends as the coolest people alive.

It was their recklessness. The way they did whatever they liked, without worrying about the consequences. The way that it always seemed to work out for them, in the end. Byunghun longed for the confidence to do things like that too. He'd been lusting after new experiences for as long as he could remember. He'd wanted to do whatever he liked, like all the pop stars did; all the rappers in the songs. He wanted to do wild things; dangerous things. He wanted to try something different; to experience something new.

But Byunghun could never convince himself to give it a go. He'd hear his mother's warning voice in his head. Thoughts of all the possible outcomes of his actions would flash through his mind, and he wouldn't be able to convince himself to go through with it. He longed to be as wild and crazy as CAP and his friends were, but he could never bring himself to do anything.

Even going up and talking to them, would present too much of a risk, which is why Byunghun had only ever admired them from afar before today.

As much as he admired CAP, he'd long since realised that Chanhee, despite his almost blindingly good looks, was the more approachable one of the two of them. He also seemed milder than CAP though, which is why in Byunghun's mind, he was not quite as cool as CAP was.

Still, he'd never been able to bring himself to do anything more than stare after the other boys longingly, from afar. If Chanhee was the only one prepared to talk to him, he didn't mind. Chanhee was cool and so pretty it should be illegal, and he was the first person to speak to him since he'd started university. He was grateful that someone as cool as Chanhee paid him enough attention to have spoken to him for a few minutes.

But in true, Byunghun style, he'd been a complete failure. He and his body never seemed to agree with one another, and so he was constantly bumping into things, tripping over things, and just generally being clumsy. At the biggest moment in his life to date; when the pretty, cool kid, Chanhee, who is best friends with Byunghun's role model, CAP spoke to him, he managed to poke himself in the eye with his own fringe.

Nice one.

Even as he started his trek home, the moment they shared in the classroom, growing more and more distant, still his heart raced. He'd been so nervous and so excited at the knowledge that he was talking to someone he admired so much, that he had gotten all choked up. He'd heard that light, cheerful voice flowing to others, so easily, a million times before, but the one time it was directed towards him, his words had dried on his tongue.

He always had to go stuffing it up, like that. Curse his shy ways! He didn't mean to get like that, he really didn't. He'd longed for the day when Chunji or CAP or anyone of their friends would notice his existence enough, just to look at him when they passed each other on the street, and instead he gets gifted with a conversation, and he can't find his voice.

But he'd been so worried that he'd say the wrong thing, and he'd sound like an idiot and then Chanhee wouldn't want to talk to him anymore. Byunghun didn't want that. Not only was Chanhee a nice guy in his own right, but he also happened to be best friends with the one and only CAP. If Byunghun made an enemy of himself with Chanhee, he'd never stand a chance of getting acknowledged by his idol.

But then, Chanhee had probably interpreted his silence as unfriendliness, hadn't he? He just had no idea what to say, and he hadn't wanted to say the wrong thing, and it was all out of his hands. He was no good at things like that. He was far too inexperienced and shy to start conversations, or keep them going with cool and important people like Chanhee.

Still, as much as he kept berating himself for all the things that he should have done differently, and all the ways that he had stuffed up his first encounter, he had good feelings about all of this. He was hopeful that they would speak to one another again the next day. Or the day after. Or next week. He wasn't sure. But he was really hopeful that Chanhee would speak to him again. He wanted a second chance; he wanted to try and do things differently with the friendly boy. He wanted to make friends, for a change. He wanted to get this right.

But before that, he'd have to decide what he should do about this latest development. Should he call his parents to brag, or just write a journal entry that went into excessive amounts of detail about the subtle nuances of their conversation and it's possible meanings for their future encounters?