“Hey baby.” 

“Siwon-sshi!” 

“How’s your first day back at work?” 

“Good. No one was judgmental. My boss was very understanding, and concerned.” 

“What!? What did he do? Did he touch you?” Siwon'a hackles are all raised prone for ready attack. The chuckle that came through the receiver confused him momentarily. 

“My boss is 60, bald with a paunch. I don’t think he is hitting on me, Siwon-sshi. Besides, he’s my mentor from school.” 

Kyuhyun continued to chuckle while Siwon mutters darkly about old men adoring young flesh. 

“You are so protective of me, Siwon-sshi.” Kyuhyun’s laugh gladdens Siwon’s heart and he smiled as he listens. “Thank you.” 

“You are very welcomed.” Siwon beamed. 

“I believe I have a meeting with….Hyukjae tomorrow.” Kyuhyun said absently as he runs through his work diary.

“With me, you mean.” 

“You? I thought you aren’t supposed to attend our meetings anymore?” 

“Well, that’s true. But Hyukkie is going to take medical leave tomorrow and Chullie is taking the day off so that leaves only me.” 

“Going to?” Amusement crept into Kyuhyun’s voice. 

“Yeah, you know…sometimes you know just when he needs to see the doctor.” Siwon mutters unconvincingly. 

“Ahuh.” Kyuhyun’s laughter is music to Siwon’s ears. 

“And I..erm….heard Hyukkie’s illness is going to take some time to heal and Chullie will be taking days off on those days when we have our meetings.” Siwon explains playfully and Kyuhyun burst out laughing at the other end of the line.

“I see.” He said wisely when he paused to breath. “I’ve to get back to work. 4 back to back meetings in an hour. How would I survive!” Kyuhyun pretends to grumble. 

“My poor baby, you will think about me and get through those meetings unscathed.” Siwon assures. “And tonight I will treat you to a BBQ dinner.” 

Siwon chuckled when he heard Kyuhyun’s breath hitched. BBQ has to be one of his absolute favorite food. 

‘Can I order prime cuts?” Kyuhyun asks. 

“Sure. As many as you want.” 

“Yesss….that promise will help me through.” 

Siwon laughed at the note of naivety in the other’s voice. ‘See you later, baby. I’ll pick you up at 7.” 

@ 

“Siwon-shii!!!”  

Siwon raised his head in a flash in response to the beautiful voice calling out to him. His text message abandoned as he watched Kyuhyun bounds towards him. 

“You look tired.” Siwon observed with a trace of worry. 

“After the second meeting, it’s all non-stop droning to me.” Kyuhyun laughed. The way he could laugh so carefreely made the man before him smiled too. “But I did hear something important!” 

“What is it?”

“I’ll tell you over dinner.” Kyuhyun said secretively. “I’m hungry! Let’s go! Let’s go!” 

@ 

“And a green tea ice cream to be served last.” Kyuhyun concluded his order much to the waitress’ relief. Siwon shook his head and laughed as she scurried away to prepare their order. 

“I think she’s in shock.” Siwon remarked. 

“What’s wrong with two healthy men eating that small amount of food?” Kyuhyun pouts cutely.

Siwon couldn’t quite answer. Kyuhyun’s definition of ‘small’ is vastly different from the normal definition. “So tell me this secret you have been harbouring inside you all this time.” He asks instead.

“Oh! Oh, yes!” Kyuhyun’s sullen expression cleared instantly. “My boss is sending me to Japan to consult on a project there.” 

“What!? How long?” Shock made Siwon drop his jaw.

“Minimum half a year.” Kyuhyun replied excitedly. “But I think it’s closer to two.” 

“WHAT?! There’s a great difference between half a year and two years!” Siwon cried out. 

“Well, the plan was for another architect to take over half a year later after I done the initial work but he’s not quite ready to leave his family and since I have no ties here I don’t mind doing the whole stint.” Kyuhyun grinned. ‘Besides I love Japan! I always wanted to live there. Now’s the best chance ever!” 

But you have me here….what’s going to happen to me? What’s going to happen to us? 

Kyuhyun did not notice how subdued Siwon suddenly became as he pattered on about all the things he plan to see and do during his two year stay. 

“I was thinking of taking up a language course and maybe a ~” Kyuhyun stops when he saw that Siwon is not listening. “Siwon-sshi? Siwon-sshi! Are you listening?”

“Hmm? Y-yes…yes I am.” Siwon tried to look interested.

‘As I was saying, I was thinking of taking up a short architect course there too!” 

“Why?” 

“Maybe I will get a job over there once I am done with the course.”

“You don’t want to come back?” Siwon’s chest is hurting so bad he couldn’t breathe. 

“Well, if I can find opportunities over there I guess I won’t mind moving there permanently.” Kyuhyun said in a surprisingly sad tone.

Please Kyu, don’t escape. Don’t run and leave me here all alone.

“Oh, here comes the food!” Kyuhyun brightens as the waitress came back with the first of their orders.

 Siwon realized that he has lost his appetite. 

@ 

“And so being the big dumb horse you really are, you did not try to tell him not to go?” Heechul asks unkindly. 

“I couldn’t! He was so excited about the opportunity.” Siwon argues weakly. 

“And money grows on trees.” Heechul mutters angrily under his breath. 

“What?” 

“All I am saying is, you could have frigging try! He could have been really genuinely excited and forgotten about you. Or he is testing you!” Heechul continued with his condescending explanation.

 “Testing?” 

“Yes, like he really want to see if you want him bad enough to forbid him to leave.”

“But why does he need to do that? He knows how much I love him!” Siwon asks irritably.

“Love is all about tests, big guy. I told you agreeing to stay just friends was a bad idea. He’s probably wondering now if you want him as a friend or as a lover.”

Siwon fell silent. He needs to consider Heechul’s words and decide how much trust he wants to warrant them. 

“By the way, I heard Japanese guys are so much more good-looking and they invented ‘’.” Heechul dropped his last bomb before leaving. 

But now as he watched Kyuhyun happily shopping for stuff he will need for the trip, Siwon still couldn’t bring himself to ask him to reconsider.  

He seems so happy and excited. 

“Siwon-sshi, should I get the blue or the green one?” Kyuhyun asks from beside him, holding up two pairs of indoor slippers. 

Neither. If you will only choose to stay instead. 

“Blue.” Siwon answered with forced cheer. 

“Hmm…I think I will get both. One for me, and one for you.” Kyuhyun said with a smile.

“Me?” 

“Yes, when you come over to visit.” 

“Oh.” 

Thank god for small miracles; like airplanes and budget airlines. 

“You are going to visit, aren’t you?” Kyuhyun asks his eyes narrowing with unexpected sadness. 

“Of-of course! Nothing can keep me away.” Siwon’s laughed nervously. Kyuhyun’s face lightened as he led him to another part of the store. 

“Cancel his order for coffee. Give him a cup of steamed soy milk.” Kyuhyun tells the waitress. “You already drank 4 cups of coffee today, no more please.” He said to the man sitting next to him.

The shopping is done. They are sitting in a café resting their aching feet, and in Kyuhyun’s case, nursing a growling stomach too. 

“Do you think this is a good idea, baby?” Siwon asks after the waitress left.

“What is? Stopping you from drinking coffee? Of course it is.”

“No, I meant you staying in Japan all alone for 2 years.”

“Why would you think it’s not a good idea?” Kyuhyun frowned. 

“Beca-cause….no one will be here to stop me from overdosing on caffeine if you are not here.” Siwon attempts to flash sad puppy eyes at the man who is laughing. 

“Awww Siwon-sshi!!! You survived despite my absence from your life the past 20 odd years, didn’t you?”

“B-but ~” 

“And I will do the same. I will take good care of myself, I promise.” Kyuhyun said with a smile.

“Why can’t you stay here and let me take care of you?” 

“I need to leave for a while.” The reply is filled with so much grief Siwon regretted immediately that he asked. “It’s not easy waking up everyday and being reminded wherever you turned of how much a failure you are.”

“You are not a failure!” Siwon protested hotly. 

“Being dumped was bad enough. Losing the baby brought failure to a whole different level.” 

Once again Siwon is struck dumb. He reached out to put his hand over Kyuhyun’s. “I’m sorry for my thoughtless words. I’m sorry…”

Kyuhyun looked at the sad man with his own sad eyes flooding with unfallen tears. He smiled, sad and weak and Siwon squeezed his hand tightly as a sign of encouragement.

@

Watching Kyuhyun moved towards the customs counter, Siwon could only look with sad eyes. After getting his passport inspected, he turned to wave for the last time and Siwon waved back, not bothering to smile anymore. 

Hence, the start of their two years’ long distance courtship. 

“God, you look like seagulls ted all over you!” Was Heechul’s first remark on Monday morning.

“Thanks.” Siwon mutters tiredly as he stirs his first cup of coffee with his eyes half closed. 

‘Good morning, Siwon-sshi.” Hyukjae greeted with his usual eye blinding super duper gummy grin.  

‘Morning, Hyukkie.”

“Wow, you look bad.” Hyukjae remarked sincerely. 

“I flew in this morning. Touched down at 6am.” Siwon replied as if that is a good explanation.

“I would understand if you two are ing like rabbits in March. But no, you are just friends. So I presumed you get to rest at normal hours.” Heechul analysed seriously. “So why do you look so worn out?” 

“Sleep is over-rated when you can talk all through the night.” Siwon took a large swig of his extra strong black coffee and grimaced. And then he is temporarily wide awake.

“You gotta be kidding.” Heechul sneers. 

“You guys talk over the phone every night.” Hyukjae points out with disbelief.

“You have no idea how much Kyuhyun has to tell me when I go over.” Siwon corrects him. 

“You poor sod!” Heechul chortles mercilessly. 

“Hey, hey, hey, I actually love listening to him talk!” Siwon disagrees.  

Heechul and Hyukjae exchanged an amused knowing look before bursting into laughter much to Siwon’s chagrin.