“Baby?” Siwon opened his front door and found Kyuhyun sitting in the living room lost in thought. Despite his calling him, Kyuhyun remained far off. “Baby? Are you feeling alright?”

Putting down his case, he approached the non-responsive man slowly so as not to startle him and sat down next to him, watching him carefully.

After a seemingly long time, Kyuhyun turned to him with a look of exasperation. “Wonnie……”

“Yes, babe?”

“Who am I?” Siwon is alarmed.

“You are Cho Kyuhyun, baby. Don’t you remember?” Siwon is almost pleading.

A sigh. “I know that, Wonnie.”

“What was that all about?” Siwon asks clearly relieved.

Instead of answering, Kyuhyun looked down at his hand. Siwon followed his stare and saw his rubber ball in the other’s hand. He looked up to give Kyuhyun a questioning look.

“I started seeing a psychologist 5 months back.” Kyuhyun explains.

5 months? That’s when…..I asked him to move in with me. Siwon thought silently.

“I wanted to overcome my fears….” Kyuhyun continues. “I can’t bear to see you sacrificing alone for me.”

“Oh baby!!!!” Siwon cried at the touching moment, crushing the slender man against him.

Kyuhyun closed his eyes to wait. Experience tells him that Siwon takes a few minutes to get over his spontaneous cheesiness. ‘Why did you not tell me? I would have gone with you.”

“It’s my problem, I wanted to face it myself. I wanted to surprise you.” Kyuhyun mutters his reply. In an instance he suddenly realised that it probably wasn’t a good idea to leave Siwon out of his therapy after all.

“Ok, I’m done.” Siwon cleared his throat after letting Kyuhyun out of his arms. “You were saying?”

“I had light hypnosis in the last couple of sessions to remove some anxiety.” Kyuhyun continued and Siwon nodded for him to go on. “I had one today…..and Dr. Lee said we probably went too far because…….” Kyuhyun looked down at the ball in his hand and rub it gently.

“Because?”

“I saw my childhood….I went back to before I was 9.”

‘That’s wonderful news, baby!” Siwon cheered. “You always wanted to know what happened before you were 9.”

As soon as his words are out of his mouth, Siwon regretted it. Remembering what Jungsu said, he doesn’t think it’s a good idea for Kyuhyun to remember after all. And judging by how gloomy Kyuhyun is right now, he knows it’s not a good idea.

“Won……I was the one who gave you this ball.” Kyuhyun announced calmly. It’s Siwon’s turn to reel in shock.

“Are….are you sure?”

“Yes. I was going to leave with my adoptive parents that day. You ran up to me just before I was about to climb into the car. You said “Hi, I am Choi Siwon.” But I did not say anything in return. I pressed this ball into your hand.”

“Oh.My.God!” Siwon exclaimed in disbelief. ‘Oh my god….baby…..it took us so long to find each other!” They embraced, still in disbelief that they actually managed to find each other amongst the millions of people.

Lying quietly in each other’s arms on the couch, they reminisced. “I remembered that they fought a lot. I can still hear them shouting and screaming at each other.” Siwon’s heart clenched painfully but he chose not to say anything else at this point of time. “They thought having a child will save their marriage. But I am not that child ~”

Siwon tightened his grip anticipating tears to fall but Kyuhyun remained dry-eyed. “I’m not the child they needed. That’s why they broke apart in the end…..if I had been more lovable, more precocious ~”

‘You are all of that and more!” Siwon cuts in. “That’s why they chose you in the first place. You are not the reason they split. No one should rely on a child to hold a marriage together.”

Kyuhyun felt his eyes ache and turned to bury his face into Siwon’s chest. Inhaling Siwon’s musky scent mixed with his spicy cologne calmed him down considerably.

“I don’t blame them for leaving me at the orphanage. Who wants a sick child?”

Siwon waits in silence and soon Kyuhyun’s body began to tremble as tears finally fell.

@

“How did the therapy sessions go?” Heechul asks one day.

“Those light hypnosis really helped. Kyu is less anxious these days.” Siwon beamed.

“That’s good. He does look happier.” Heechul agrees offhandedly.

“You saw him? Where?” Siwon frowned.

“Hmm? Erm…..owww…..tummyache….Gotta go!” Heechul dashed out of the room before Siwon could respond.

“Something’s up.” Siwon mutters to himself as his phone rang. “What’s up, baby?”

“Wonnie!”

‘Yes, baby?”

“I have to work late tonight. Can you eat alone tonight?” Kyuhyun asks from the other line. Siwon’s heart fell. He was so looking forward to tonight; he has plans.

“But baby…..I got plans for us tonight!”

“Sorry, Wonnie. I need to rush a report.”

“Can’t you do that at home after dinner?” Siwon pouts.

“No, I need to submit it before midnight!”

“But ba~” Siwon is very close to whining.

“Be a good boy, get your own dinner. I’ll make it up to you tomorrow, ok?”

“But ~” Siwon is ready to throw a tantrum.

“AISH! Not again! I gotta go, Wonnie, the figures are changed again, I have to get the report going!”

Siwon’s lips are caught in the process of forming another ‘Baby’ but there’s a click and the phonecall ended. He stared at the handset in his hand with disbelief. Then he got really upset.

“How could you, Cho Kyuhyun!” He mutters in extreme disappointment. ‘Fine! You don’t wanna be with me tonight, I’ve got friends and they would want to keep me company!”

“Sorry, I’ve a date.” Heechul replied with a show of extreme boredom when he was asked.

“I would love to, but Hae…he….he wants to…you know….” Hyukjae tried to explain but began tripping over his tongue with so much discomfort that Siwon had to stop him out of sympathy.

So poor lonely Siwon b with angst made his way to a takeout shop and bought himself a small sized dinner and half a dozen bottles of soju.

If no one will celebrate for me, I’ll celebrate it myself! Siwon thought defiantly as he dragged his feet home. No matter how macho he may sound, he really isn’t looking forward to an empty home and getting horribly drunk. By the time he reached his front door, he is wallowing in so much self-pity he’s drowning in it.

Heaving a heavy sigh he unlocked the door and walked into the darkness. As he fumbled about for the switch, lights sprung alive at the same moment when loud cheers rang out at such force almost knocking him off his feet. His eyes bulged as he stood frozen at his doorway staring at the beaming faces before him.

“Wh ~”

Kyuhyun detached himself from the crowd as he came forward to peck Siwon on the cheek. “Happy Birthday, Wonnie.” He whispers before pulling away to admire the transience from surprise to disbelief then joy on Siwon’s attractive face.

“How did you ~ but you said…..” Siwon mumbled incoherently as he looked at everyone present at his birthday bash. There’s Heechul, Hyukjae, Donghae, his colleagues from his office too.

The house is decorated in a haphazard manner with party ts, and the kitchen table is piled with lots of food while the kitchen counter is covered with drinks of every imaginable kind.

How did Kyuhyun managed all this?

Heechul declared that the party begins and music began playing. Kyuhyun led Siwon to the kitchen and relieved him of everything he is still grasping in his hand, having no opportunities to put anything down since he entered the house.

“You did all this for me, baby?” Siwon asks in wonderment.

“Yes, it’s your birthday and I thought a party would be great, everyone’s here to celebrate it for you.” Kyuhyun giggled. However, Siwon is so touched that he is speechless, and even looked like he is about to cry. He felt so guilty for thinking bad things about his thoughtful mate.

“I’m so sorry baby, I was angry and I became spiteful and I-I didn’t mean it…..” Siwon mutters tearfully face stricken with guilt.

Kyuhyun smiled at his usually impeccable lover reduced to tears. Caressing his damp cheek, he it tenderly. “You are human, Wonnie. Humans have dark thoughts all the time.” He consoles.

“Not you, baby. You never had them.” Siwon muttered still unconvinced but Kyuhyun only smiled.

“It’s your birthday today, everyone is waiting to give you your birthday wishes. Go on out, don’t keep your guests waiting.” Kyuhyun urged gesturing at the roomful of people.

Siwon turned and saw through the doorway his colleagues looking curiously at him. “You coming baby?” He turned back to ask.

“In a minute. I’ll serve another round of drinks. You go on.” Kyuhyun replied, pressing a bottle of lager into his hand. Siwon left Kyuhyun’s side reluctantly, walking out to join the merrymaking. As Kyuhyun watched, his colleagues surround him pretty quick and soon Siwon is smiling again.

The party went on smoothly. While Siwon mingled and entertained, Kyuhyun made sure every guest is fed well. That’s not to mean Siwon forgotten about his hard at work lover. Every so often he will turn to search the room for him, always finding him smiling or chatting or serving.

@

“Baby?” Siwon wanders into his bedroom after seeing the last of his guests out. The party had started to wind down and by the time it ended, Siwon couldn’t recall when Kyuhyun had disappeared to. Frowning lightly, he enters the dimly lit room. A trace of fragrance lingered in the air and tickled his nose. “Baby?”

“Yes Won?” Kyuhyun’s sultry voice replied. Siwon took another step then froze. His eyes bulged for the second time today.

Kyuhyun is lying on his side across their bed wearing only a pair of boxer briefs and a bowtie made out of ribbons. One hand propped his head up while the other is drawing circles on the mattress next to his bare chest.

“Baby ~” Siwon swallowed hungrily.

“You have not forgotten to open my present to you, have you?” Kyuhyun murmurs with a cute pout as he blinks at Siwon.

“I-I……” Siwon stutters nervously.

the bowtie around his bare neck, “What are you waiting for?” Kyuhyun giggled.

Siwon dashed to bed and jumped in, colliding into Kyuhyun. “Ca-can I taste my present first?” he asks eagerly.

“It’s your present. You can do anything you want.” Kyuhyun whispers invitingly and immediately found himself pressed onto his back against the bed and his lips attached to Siwon’s.

Silence follows as Siwon , nip, nibble and his way around all the bare skin proffered to him. He used his teeth to pull the bowtie loose, growling like a hungry bear and that made Kyuhyun giggle.

“Won…Wonnie…..” Kyuhyun pants as Siwon is busy savouring the skin in the dip under his chest ribs. ‘Wonnie…..”

“Hmmm?” Siwon hummed his reply, too preoccupied to stop.

“Wonnie…..”Kyuhyun gasps louder. “Let’s try again please?”

Siwon’s head snapped up in a hurry. Kyuhyun looked back at him with eyes bright and cheeks flushed. “You sure, babe?”

“Yes….I want to give you a real birthday present, Won.”

Siwon nodded solemnly as he debated with himself if it’s a good idea. Another look at Kyuhyun’s face filled with anticipation decides it for him. He shifts and got onto his knees. “Baby, remember, don’t push yourself. If you need to stop don’t hesitate.”

Kyuhyun nodded timidly, his mind already reminding him of the pain he will be experiencing. But he is determined to go through it because Siwon deserves better.

“Won ~” He beckons and Siwon nears.