Kibum has been in his coma for nine days now. Except when you left to shower and change, you were always at his side; you even skipped classes to see Kibum. Sometimes you talked to him: you told him about Song Qian and Ryeowook and all your other friends at university (you didn't bring up Hyukjae—it was a topic you were trying to avoid for the time being); you told him about all your favorite memories growing up together; you told him about how a surprising number of fans had come up to support Kibum in the hospital and how often the security had to come by and regulate. But a lot of the time, you just sat there and stared at him, watching his chest rise and fall evenly. His wounds were healing gradually, but he was still pale and fragile-looking, still not the Kibum you knew and loved.
You tried your best to keep his hospital room friendly and welcoming, for when he woke up. You displayed all the fan letters and even brought pictures of his family and friends in. Flowers weren't allowed, but you changed the balloons when they deflated. You kept the TV on to funny variety shows and even made sure you yourself were clean and looking nice, because you didn't want to look or smell like trash when we woke up. And you were convinced he would.
That day, the ninth day of Kibum's coma, the doctor came in again. He was a friendly man with a kind smile and a professional manner.
He sat down next to you and held up some charts, waving them with a smile. "His brain activity is increasing. Actually, it's been increasing over the past two days. This is a sign that he's bound to wake up. Inside, he's thinking, feeling, maybe even dreaming. He seems to be aware of his surroundings, through smell, sound, and touch, because his brain is processing his nerve transmissions."
"He'll wake up soon, then?" You turned to the doctor, a hopeful, triumphant look dawning on your face. You knew Kibum would come back. You knew it. It was always just a matter of time.
"I can't tell you how soon," the doctor said cautiously. "But if you talk to him, get his friends and family to talk to him, it might speed the process up, give him something to work for, something to wake up to. I'm pretty certain that he can hear you. In fact, he could be listening to you right now."
You gasped slightly and turned to rest your gaze on Kibum's peaceful face. "Bummie? Can you really hear me?" You grabbed his hand. "Please wake up soon. I really…miss you."
Smiling at the tender scene before him, the doctor got up quietly and left the two young people to themselves.
He was a man of science, one who believed in the powers of technology, medicine, and good, hard research. But in all his years as a doctor, he had witnessed something just as—if not more—powerful than medicine. And he could easily see how lucky you and Kibum were to share it—to share love.
~*~
"Yah, Kim Kibum!"
"Ryeowook, shhh!" you scolded the boy as he walked into the hospital room, shouting. "You're in a hospital; stop being so loud!"
"____, you are such a spoilsport," he stuck his tongue out at you. He dragged a chair to sit next to you at Kibum's bedside. "Besides, I was just trying to wake this pabo up."
"He'll come around eventually," you said, smiling brightly. "Today might even be the day!"
Ryeowook grinned down at his friend, who was lying on the hospital, looking as peaceful as ever, if not a bit skinny. "As soon as he gets out of here, I'm going to cook him up a feast. He's way too skinny now."
"You hear that, Kim Kibum?" he added in a slight shout. "You better wake up soon because my kitchen is waiting!"
"Did someone say kitchen? Are you cooking?"
You lifted your eyes from Kibum's face. "Siwon!"
Siwon walked in with his classic dimpled smile on his face. "How's our boy?" he asked, tossing his jacket—and his body—into a nearby chair.
"He's getting better," you told him, getting up to give him a hug. "I'm sure he'd be glad you're here."
"If only we had Han Geng hyung with us, we'd practically be complete again," Siwon said with a sigh, staring at his friend.
"Han Geng's off making his dreams come true," you said with a small smile. "But I'm sure he'd want to be here for Kibum, too."
You sat in silence for a moment thinking about Heechul and Han Geng and Kibum all at once, until you were startled out of your reverie by the sound of knocking.
"Unni!" a chorus of cheerful voices cried out. "We came to visit you!"
"Soonkyu!" you gasped. "Sooyoung! Miyoung...Sooyeon, all of you! What are you doing here?"
"We came to visit Kibum oppa, and you of course! We brought you some of your schoolwork, and some cake and cookies. And we wanted to keep you company. We heard you've been here for a long time now."
You enveloped them all in a warm hug. "Thank you so much! This is so thoughtful and sweet. You guys are the best."
The girls bowed in greeting to Siwon and begun chattering away, talking and laughing and making the room a whole lot brighter than it ever had been in the past two weeks. Ryeowook pulled his girlfriend, Miyoung, to him, placing a soft kiss on her forehead and talking to her softly.
You watched them regretfully. You placed a hand over Kibum's, thinking to yourself, Please wake up, Bummie. Don't leave me alone like this.
"Unni?"
Your head snapped up. "Oh—yeah?"
"Are you okay?" Soonkyu asked, her face and voice filled with concern.
"It's—it's nothing," you said lamely, hanging your head.
"You miss him, don't you?" Siwon said quietly.
"I miss him a lot," you admitted, your voice catching. "I'm just...worried. And scared."
Ryeowook came to put his arm around you, rubbing your arm and reassuring, "He will wake up. He will be fine, and I'll be there for you every step of the you."
"Me too," Siwon said, flashing his dimples at you.
"And me," each of the girls added.
"Thank you, guys," you told them gratefully, feeling a little silly for letting your doubts get the best of you. You turned back to sit and look at Kibum, still holding his hand gently in yours. Eventually the conversations around you started up again.
You were thankful for their presence. For the laughter you never could quite bring to the room, for doing their best to support you and Kibum and cheer you up. But the truth was...
Kibum-ah, you whispered to him in your head. As terrible as this is, I would trade all of them just to see you smile at me again.
~*~
Long after all the guests had left—or rather, had been kicked out by the nurses for going over the guest limit—you were sitting quietly by Kibum's bedside, flipping through your phone, occassionally updating Kibum with what you were reading about the news, the world, the celebrities, and your friends. However, one of your moments of silence was interrupted by yet another knock.
"Come in," you said absently, still flicking through your phone.
"_____."
You jumped. That voice...
"Hyukjae?!"
"Hi," he said with a slight smile, pulling up a chair to sit next to you. "How have you been?"
You glanced at Kibum, then at Hyukjae, before averting your gaze. "Not too good..."
"I bet," he sighed. "I haven't seen you in two weeks, you know."
"Hyuk, I'm sorry," you began, but he cut you off.
"I know. I get it. But I really missed you," he said, picking up your hand and lacing his fingers through yours. You could feel his eyes burning the side of your face, though you still refused to look at him. "I had a dance performance, but you missed it."
"I'm—"
He kept going, determined to speak. "And I was so worried about you, with all the time you've been spending at the hospital. I kept hoping that somehow, you would try to contact me in any way...but you never did."
"Lee Hyukjae, I'm so sor—"
He sighed again. "I get it. You're sorry."
"What do you want me to say?" you said, not even defending yourself. You could only let the remorse and guilt leak into your voice.
"Tell me honestly," he said, using his other hand to grab your chin and force you to look at him. "How long do you plan on staying here?"
"As long as it takes!" you cried, staring into his frustrated eyes.
"What if he doesn't wake up?" Hyukjae asked, unintentionally letting his frustration slip through.
"Don't say that!" you said desparately, ripping your hand from his. "He will; I know he will!"
"And until that happens, you plan on waiting here?" he asked, sounding tired all of a sudden.
You didn't answer him for a moment.
Hyukjae asked you again, in a pleading tone, this time begging for you to say what he wanted, what he needed to hear. "Will you wait for him?"
No answer.
"_____, look at me and tell me! Are you going to wait for him for forever?!"
"I will," you said, tears slipping out. Tears for what you've done to Hyukjae, what you were about to do. Tears for Kibum, tears because you messed everything and everyone up because you were too messed up to fix your own problems, tears for your regret and everything that should've been. "I will wait, because I know he would do the same for me."
"And me?" he asked, his eyes soft, his voice broken.
"I'm...going to be where I've been for the past two weeks."
Hyukjae found his answer. He felt a little grateful that you had held back from saying the words he feared, but he still felt the message loud and clear.
The girl he had liked so much for so long was picking another man over him.
Is this how you feel right now, Kim Kibum? he thought, staring blankly at his rival, lying in front of him. Do you feel numb? Do you feel pain? Do you feel everything all at once, so much that you can't bear it?
"I'll go then," he finally said.
"Hyukjae..."
"Take care of yourself," he said. He tried to smile but failed. "For me."
"You take care of yourself, too," you told him, trying to comfort him in any way that you could. As he walked out, you felt a little piece of your heart breaking. "I liked him, too, Kibum. He was special to me, too."
You his face ever-so-gently. "But you...you are everything to me. I'd do anything for you, even hurt Hyukjae and myself like that again, if only you would wake up. Please, wake up!"
His face seemed to twitch under your fingertips.
"Bummie? Kibum-ah?"
"_____..."
"KIBUM!"
A/N: Wow. I'm sorry it's been so long. I'm starting university soon, so I decided to update while I still definitely had time. Thank you all for waiting! We're almost there, my lovely readers!!! I'm so done with this story, LOL. But because I have such amazing, sweet, readers who always encourage me, I will definitely finish this story for you guys. Thank you so much for your support.
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