Winter's head is a mess.

Winter did not peg herself out as someone who can handle long-distance relationships.

If she's being honest, she didn't think she'd be in a relationship during high school too. Maybe, college. Maybe after graduating.

Maybe she'll meet someone at a library or a coffee shop or a movie theater if she ends up watching a movie alone again. 

Not that she's currently in a relationship, no.

Not yet, at least.

But being in a long-distance relationship is something she never has given a thought, ever. 

She thinks about Karina, her Min-min unnie, her confident smile, her expressive eyes, and it makes her want to cry.

So here she is, bundled in her blanket with a pillow on top of her head and a nosy sister knocking on her door.

"Minjeongie, are you awake?"

Winter thinks Taeyeon is a great sister. If you grow up idolizing your sister a lot, you'd always have lingering thoughts in your head thinking 'will I be ever as good as her?'

Winter knows she won't. 

Taeyeon is built differently. Maybe because their parents had her at a young age? Maybe because she was used to being the only child for quite some time? Maybe because—

"I'm coming in."

Winter should lock her door more often.

She felt her bed dip but she didn't make any move to let her sister know she's awake. She's not in the mood to cry again anyway, so she'd stay quiet and hidden and just wait till her sister comes out of her room.

"Minjeongie... Are you alright?"

Winter thinks about the answer to that. 

When people ask you how you are, your automatic response is always along the lines of yeah I'm fine, I'm doing good, and all the ways you can tell them quickly that you're not up to discuss what's going on in your life.

But when her sister asked that, Winter felt her heart sting.

Enough for her to grip her chest because damn, that hurts.

Winter feels the sheets getting pulled away from her body and the next moment, her sister is spooning her.

"I'm so sorry Minjeongie." Taeyeon coos in her neck and that's when the tears just showered down like waterfalls. 

Winter cries quietly in her sister's arms, shoulders moving up and down as she tries her best to be quiet. 

These kinds of tears are the most painful ones. The ones where you try so hard not to let them out so you sob real quiet and it hurts your chest, hurts your eyes, hurts your heart. 

"Shhh. Let it all out." Taeyeon rubs her back and Winter flips herself over to face her sister, basking in the comfort of her touch and letting her tears fall into her sister's chest. 

"If you really want this, I can't fight for this alone." Taeyeon murmurs. "You have to fight for this yourself. So I can back you up." 

Winter knows it's not going to be easy. 

How many times did she have to explain to her mom that she's happy and healthy and is doing great here, living with Taeyeon and going to AE-U?

Four?

Five?

She lost count.

She can't find the words— no, she can't speak a word because she's crying so hard hurts.

If she's just like her sister...

If she can only face her mom and be like—No, I will not come home. 

This...

This is my home...

-

August came rushing in like floating dried maple leaves and drying rivers.

Minjeong thinks her analogy doesn't make sense (because it doesn't) but she looks at the dates passing by her calendar, a heavy reminder of a virtual deadline set by her mom.

Two more weeks.

Two more weeks before the summer break ends.

Two more weeks before she's expected to come home.

Two more weeks before—

Winter sees her phone ringing from her bedside table.

min-min unnie calling...

Winter clears before sliding her finger to answer the call.

"Winter?"

"Karina-unnie?"

"How— how are you?" 

"I've had better days." Winter chuckles.

There was a brief silence on the line. Winter clears again.

"How are you? How's everyone?" Winter asked.

"They're... fine, I guess? I did not tell them anything, if that's what you mean."

Winter sighs and internally thanked the older. She knows the rest of the gang are probably confused as to what's going on with her, having received nothing but radio silence from her after their trip. 

Of course, Ningning and Chaeryeong had been reaching out as well and knows her predicament, but no one else aside from them and Karina is aware of what's going on with Winter's life.

"I— I have resigned from the coffee shop." Winter starts.

"Does this mean—"

"I don't know. I know I promised you but..."

"Winter—"

"...but I really tried to tell her. I did. A lot of times. It's just that, omma, she— umm..."

"Winter, you don't have to explain. I understand." Karina whispers on the other line. "If you— if you really have to go... I'll understand."

"I don't want to go."

"I know, baby. I know."

"Can we meet?" Winter said, though surprised by her sudden decision as well.

"I— are you sure? Will you be fine?"

"Yeah, yeah. I mean, omma is not here anymore, but she'll be back next week to— umm... to-"

"I'd love to see you." Karina answers and Winter can hear a sigh from the older. It sounded like something she had been holding back for a while now.

"I'll ask appa to drive me to your place. Can I umm— can I sleep over?"

Winter closed her eyes in relief.

"Please."

-

Karina arrives just in time for dinner. 

Taeyeon hugs the younger apologetically, grabbing her bag, ready to bring it upstairs to Winter's room. Karina sat at the living room couch, nodding to Taeyeon.

"Stay here, I'll call Minjeongie so we can eat dinner okay?" Taeyeon rubs Karina's back, the action oddly comforting for the younger.

After few minutes, Winter comes down in her large hoodie and boy shorts (a little too short if you ask Karina—that it looks like she's not wearing anything underneath the hoodie). Karina blushed at this and looked away, embarrassed that she's thinking inappropriate things at a very inappropriate time. 

She was brought back to the present with silence.

Silence because Winter is suddenly on her lap, face buried in her neck, with arms hugging her tight. 

"Bogoshipoyo...."

Karina smiles and hugs her back, feeling too soft to function properly.

She hears the clinking of plates from the kitchen and knows Taeyeon can see them, but she doesn't let go.

"I missed you too, min-min baby."

Karina feels Winter's hold tighten and she did the same, her arms s around the younger's waist.

"Come on babies, let's have dinner." Taeyeon calls, but Karina waits for Winter to let go before she does the same.

They sat in silence, passing the food to each other and munching on their dinner quietly. 

Taeyeon looks at them back and forth, unsure of what she can do to make it easier for the youngsters.

"I don't really understand what's happening, to be fair. Omma is just insisting on having Minjeong back home, and I don't even understand why." She starts.

"It's okay, unnie. Don't