Looking out the window, seeing the kimchi restaurant lady making her way back to her restaurant after conversing with Mrs. Choi, Jeonghan leaned back against the chair and let his head fall on the desk. It had been almost a week and he was already feeling better but the family didn’t let him return to his dorm room until the bruises heal. Well, they were healing, and now there were only red marks. Only scabs were left on his lips and around his eyes, they didn’t hurt.

Jeonghan didn’t know why they were making such a big deal out of what happened.

Such a weird bunch, the Chois.

His phone buzzed and Jeonghan looked to see a message from Nayeon, a girl from the singing club with whom he shares most his classes. She sent him a picture of her notes and the assignments for the day, like she had been doing for the past few days. Joshua told him about the note she left in his room, offering to him to and from his classes when the news about his attack broke out. Apparently, a few other acquaintances did the same thing, but he didn’t know because he hadn’t been back since.

They were weird too, offering to go so far for a stranger. If it were him, he couldn’t care less.

Typing the usual thanks, Jeonghan got to his laptop and started on his assignment. He tried to search for the free copy of the book online, since he didn’t bring his from his room, but decided to use the chance to go out instead; this has got to be the longest he had been without going out. There should be a library here he can go to.

Owh, but he needs a library card. Seungcheol must have it.

Looking around the desk, he pulled out the drawers one by one with no luck. He did saw a few doodles Seungcheol made during his student life, which were amusing. Laughing to himself, he closed the drawers and stared at the picture of small Choi Seungcheol smiling at him on the desk.

The alpha had always been pretty, his eyes big and bright since birth. Such a cute boy.

Suddenly interested in all the alpha’s ‘masterpieces’, Jeonghan glanced around to and grabbed one of his old textbooks from high school. If Seungcheol was like any normal students, he would have drawn some things in his books out of boredom. And knowing how passionate his frie-, his lov-, Seungcheol is about Physics and Mathematics, Jeonghan chose the history book to be his first attempt.

‘Pffttt…’ Indeed, there were a lot of doodles on the historical figures’ faces. Seungcheol even wrote some interesting dialogues. His handwriting… really bad. Smiling to himself, he brought the book as he flopped on the bed, just imagining how bored the alpha must have been to have written so much. He wondered if the guy even passed his History exams, or how well he did as a student. Jeonghan himself is a really good one, even acing all his science subjects despite his passion in literature. Seungcheol looks like he would struggle. Not that, he was looking down on the male. He just thought with all the extra activities the alpha were doing, he might have less focus in his studies.

Finally done flipping the book, Jeonghan was about to put it back in its place before the noticing the back. A new handwriting was on the back cover along with two stick figures, behind them a picture of a house and a dog.

Woori + Seungie.

Mouth twitching, Jeonghan pushed the book back, not feeling too good. He forgot the alpha used to have a girlfriend he adored all throughout high school.

Seungie.

What a joke. It didn’t even fit him. The alpha is definitely a ‘Cheol’.

Out of curiousity, Jeonghan scanned the whole place for any other signs of the girl. They dated for so long, surely he has her photo or gifts from her in his room. Walking around, biting his thumbnail, not really caring about the other’s privacy which he had been so careful not to breach, Jeonghan finally shook his head in relief.

There was none of such thing in the room.

Of course, they broke up. Seungcheol already moved on. Obviously he threw everything away. He must have forgotten about the one in the book.

Yes. Seungcheol already moved on.

Sitting on the floor, Jeonghan let out a soft chuckle. Why the hell was he so anxious anyway? So what if the alpha still has her pictures? He hadn’t told Seungcheol about his feeling yet so it was not as if they were official or anything…

*****

‘What’re you making?’ the young omega asked as he made his way down, finding the bedroom a bit suffocating.  Mrs. Choi was frying something, there were a few other ingredients on the table. She noticed Jeonghan standing on one of the steps, just looking and called him down before answering.

‘Need any help?’

‘Can you clean the fish?’ She pointed at the fresh ones in the sink. She knew from their trip that the young man couldn’t cook, but he went fishing with them, surely they taught him how to prepare the fish. On the other hand, Jeonghan nodded his head, telling her to let him handle it. He saw how the alphas and Haneul did it. Looked simple enough.

Well, it looked simple. Except, the fish they caught didn’t have such big eyes. Jeonghan poked. These ones were squishy. And smelly. He poked again. So squishy. These must have gone bad. Jeonghan turned to face the mother, ‘clean them?’ 

‘And cut them into two pieces.’ Taking a deep breath, he took one of the floppy fishes and washed them under the water. Then he forcefully pushed the knife right in the middle before gasping. Something slimy was coming out of the fish!

‘Eomeoni!’ He called, at lost at what to do. The lady turned, eyes wide, looking at Jeonghan who just stared back at her. ‘I think it’s bad.’

‘That’s the inside. You need to clean that out.’

‘Aaah…’ Jeonghan dragged his words, face red in embarrassment. Bringing the fish back to the tap, he heard her laugh before she came and took it from him, showing how to do it. ‘What’re you doing down here?’

‘I-uh, was bored.’

‘Owh…’ She replied and Jeonghan grabbed another fish and cleaned it with her. This was fun. Helping her prepare the dinner was fun. He never enjoyed preparing the food back at the shelter hence why he always ran away by volunteering with the venues. Well, the thought of being stuck with gossiping and nagging ahjummas was never pleasant so that was that. Had there been someone as delightful as Mrs. Choi, he would’ve learned how to cook years ago.

*****

Jeonghan sat at the dining table, looking at Seungcheol who was eating his dinner. He just got back from his part-time job, it was already really late. Jeonghan would have thought the man would stay at his dorm room since it was nearer but just like he promised, he came back despite having to take one of the last buses. ‘What?’

‘I cleaned the fish.’ Seungcheol laughed through his nose at the report. Such an adorable gesture, to be excited over such small thing. He asked whether the omega helped with anything else and Jeonghan enthusiastically talked about how he had a hand during the whole cooking process. ‘Really? You’ll be as good as eomma in no time.’

Jeonghan simpered, he could tell the man was embarrassed. Suddenly imagining them together as a young family, Seungcheol cleared his throat and continued eating, asking how Jeonghan’s day went to change the atmosphere. His parents were already sleeping so there were only the two of them downstairs. If things get awkward, it would stay awkward. He didn’t want that.

‘You have your library card?’ the omega asked, and Seungcheol looked up, trying to remember. He went to the library a few times but doesn’t remember ever making one. His brother, on the other hand, might have it. Jeonghan nodded a few times at the reveal, now knowing why he couldn’t find it. Just then, the alpha offered to borrow the book for him from the school library which he rejected.

‘I can do that. I’m already good enough to go back.’

Seungcheol felt heavy from the words. Forcing himself a bitter smile, he continued eating. Ignoring it. Trying to figure out what to say. He was reminded of the time Jeonghan wanted to go back during the trip because he was uncomfortable being with them. Was he uncomfortable now?

‘I should go back. I’ve been here too long.’

‘You-, urm.’ He halted, trying to rearrange his words. Truthfully, Seungcheol never want the omega to leave. Getting to see him everyday, knowing he is safe, he really loves the last week Jeonghan had been in the house. Even now, the man waiting for him to be back and sitting with him like this, talking about random things, he never thought he needed this.

He loves seeing this part of Jeonghan. He wanted to keep seeing this part of Jeonghan.

He didn’t want to get back to wondering if Jeonghan was in his room or if he went out to party and get himself in trouble. He didn’t want to wonder if this man in front of him was having a nightmare or if he was sound asleep.

He wanted to keep Jeonghan near him.

But apparently that was not what the man wanted. It was time to stop being selfish and let him do what he desires. ‘I’ll send you back Sunday?’

‘Okay…’ Jeonghan seemed satisfied with the answer, much to his disappointment. ‘Thank you.’

‘Yeah.’

*****

Jeonghan gave the alpha one last look before closing the bedroom door, letting himself fall to a sitting position.

Feeling comforted by the alpha’s presence just now, it struck him that he had an anxiety attack this evening, scared that Seungcheol would return to his past lover. That was messed up. How did he came to depend on the man so much? When did he became like this? It scared him that the alpha can have such effect on him. He needed to put some