Eccedentesiast (n.) – A person who fakes a smile, when all they want to do is cry, disappear or die.

(JONGIN)

I couldn’t leave Yoona at the hospital alone. Her health isn’t going well, her face became paler and paler but she tried to suppress it with makeup. Sometimes, she needed to inject blood.

But thank God she’s strong and optimistic. She looks as pretty as always.

“Why do you keep coming here?”

Although she’s strong, she sometimes feels irritated and inferior due to the illness. You have to be very patient with her, “You need me. The nurses are not your maid and you easily get lonely.”

She was sitting on the patient’s bed, “My brother needs you at the hotel, too.”

“He can handle that,” I tried to explain, “He’s a good manager.”

“I don’t want you to be here,” she said, “You don’t even like me. You said you wouldn’t date me unless you are crazy.”

She has been keeping that in her mind.

“Don’t take it seriously. I was joking.”

“So, do you like me?” she was so liberal and open in things like this. I was speechless over her question.

“I’m asking if you like me,” she repeated, “It’s been years. You kept me hanging.”

She sounded serious, unlike her usual self, “Don’t tell me that we’re just friends. Both of us know we are not. Now, I’m literally dying, waiting for you to confirm your feeling, you dramatic !”

I’ve always thought she deserved a better guy. When she called me dramatic, I came to realize I was one.

Her tears started to fall along her cheeks which hurts me, “Please, don’t,” I uttered, “Don’t cry.”

I got closer to her. I wanted to hold her but my hands couldn’t do as I wanted. My heart and head were against each other.

“Am I suffering from this alone? Don’t you like me, too?” she sobbed, “Why can’t you just accept the fact?”

My heart couldn’t handle more of her tears. It was so heavy.

She couldn’t stop sobbing. I slowly grabbed her neck to draw her closer to my face. I opened my soul as I kissed her in her lips since my feeling for her couldn’t be expressed with words.

As my lips touched hers, the fireworks glowed inside my both heart and mind. They’ve finally united.

I slowly let go of her.

I did it.

But the awkwardness after it was torture. How do people cope with their first kiss, especially with a person they are not yet lovers?

“I’m gonna get some water.”

I had to get out of here but I cannot blame myself enough for saying that. I should have been more romantic.

I could have been more rational.

Yoona seemed to be awkward with the situation. I said I’d go get water but I came out of that room without any water bottle. I slapped my face to check the level of reality.

Then I saw Irene. Okay, let’s talk to her to calm me down.

“Irene!” I called her, “are you here to meet Yoona?”

She shook her head, “I’m here to meet my dad.”

Of course, her dad. He is the vice-president. Just as I was about to say any further words, “Jongin, can you excuse me? I am on my way to Sehun. I need to talk about something important.”

She was in a rush, “Oh… I’m sorry. Okay. See you.”

She smiled, “See you.”

(IRENE)