CHAPTER XXII

“I thought I already said no surprise?” Rosé confront all Jennie, Lisa and Jisoo when she get back home from meeting Jungkook at the cafe earlier. “Why are you all turning your back on me now? Am I not your friend anymore?” she asked. She is not mad towards them but she is quite disappointed that her request is not being taken seriously. She thought she could count on her friends or she has already considered them as family.

All Jennie, Lisa and Jisoo looks at each other.

“It was all my fault, Chae. I know that the bride and groom wouldn’t have the time to settle down on the wedding and that they would ask their friend to come meet you instead but I didn’t ask for the name. I never expected that their friend would be him,” Jisoo explained.

Rosé sighed.

“Alright never mind. But I wouldn’t go to discuss it with him anymore. Lisa, you do it after this okay? I will prepare all the works, you go and discuss,” Rosé says and walks upstairs to her room.

She throw herself onto the bed and left out a heavy sigh. She is exhausted. Of everything that had happened. Who would’ve thought that the first thing she had to face upon her arrival in Korea is meeting Jungkook. She closed her eyes for a while.

(knocks on door)

Rosé opens up her eyes and look at the door. The door clink open. She sees Lisa walking inside towards her and lay besides her, staring at the ceiling blankly. Rosé looks at Lisa beside her.

“Are you mad at us?” Lisa asks silently.

Rosé turns her look at the ceiling.

“No,” she said.

Both of them are silent for a while before Lisa broke the silence between them.

“I know how it feels,” Lisa said. Rosé turns to look back at Lisa. “Being broken hearted,” she continued. “When my parents broke up, I was only 7. But I was very sad to think that I won’t be able to meet my dad again after that day. I blame my mother for being so heartless, allowing my abusive dad to leave. What’s more when my mother remarried.” Lisa tells. “But as I grew up, I see the difference between how my real dad and my step dad taking care of my mom. And I finally understand, that it takes the right person and the right time for us to finally achieve that highest level of happiness as long as you are bold enough to make decision and give chances.”

Rosé smiles.

“How is it the same with my broken hearted?” she asks.

“Chae, can you imagine who will be the victim if my mom chose to stay with my dad? I will. I doubt my life will be like now if we were still living with my dad,” Lisa turns to look at Rose who is looking at her. “Just like you,” she said. “Your action denied but do your heart are saying likewise? Have you think of your daughter?” Lisa asked seriously.

“She is fine, Lisa. Don’t make a fuss over it,” Rosé said.

“She is fine now. But she knows that her dad exists. What if she grew up later and thinking why can’t she live a normal life with her parents just like her friends?” Lisa questioned Rosé. “Don’t abuse her emotional state, Chae. If you really can’t accept him, talk to him about it. Explain it to Jiyeon together with him. So that she knew, and well prepared for the future. Don’t stop her from meeting him.” Lisa continued. “Of course, the situation between my parents and yours is contrary, but I hope you could understand my point. To me, he seems sincere with you. It’s not wrong to give him a chance, right?”

Rosé thinks for a while.

“Can I ask you something?” Rosé said.

“Mm-”

“How hurt would you be if you were being left alone after getting pregnant, being thrown away by your family, struggle alone to brought up a child when you yourself just barely escaped your teenage years and being ignored by people because you’re just a nobody towards them?” Rosé asked.

Lisa did not answer.

“I don’t mind if you don’t understand how hurt it is for me, because I am very thankful of you, Jennie and Jisoo unnie for not leaving me behind when I was at the bottom. But, I just want your support in every decision I make continuously. Do you think it’s easy for me to walk away just like this? He is the one I throw my heart and my life to back then. But he crushed it in a blink of an eye. I gave him another chances despite not recognizing myself, he stepped on my trust for him. Do you think I still have the courage to risk my life and my feelings for the same person? I don’t,” Rosé’s tears flows out of her eyes.

“Chae-”

“I really wanted to give him another chance, but I am too scared. I am too vulnerable now to accept another heartbreak. I am not as strong as before, Lisa. Every single time I think of what is going to happen tomorrow really scares me a lot. Because I could not predict if I would meet him again or not, or if I would accept if I ever heard that he is getting married the next day, or if he decided to take away Jiyeon and left me all alone. I started to accept that his mistakes in the past was because we were too young back then, but what excuses should I make to myself for him if he breaks my heart again in the future?” Rosé cried.

(knocks on door)

“Chae,” Jennie came in. Rosé wipes her tears and sit up on her bed. Lisa did the same. “He’s downstairs. Do you want me to chase him out?” Jennie asks. Her expression looks concern.

“It’s okay. I’ll come down in a bit,” Rosé said.

Jennie nods and left the room.

Rosé washes her face and come downstairs a bit later. She sees everyone are already at the living room including Lisa. Jiyeon is sitting on Jungkook’s lap. Rosé left out a small sigh and walks towards them, taking a seat beside Lisa.

“Why did you come here?” she asked.

“I figured you don’t like it if you have to come and discuss with me about the wedding, so I came to tell you that I will ask someone else to meet up with you instead after this,” Jungkook tells her. Of course, that was just another excuse of his.

“You can just text me,” Rosé said.

“Em-” Jungkook cleared his throat. “I wanted to meet Jiyeon as well,” he said silently.

Rosé nods lightly.

“Go ahead if you want to bring her out. Just make sure to send her back before 9pm,” Rose allows him. He looks at Rosé, disbelief. The same reaction came from Jennie, Lisa and Jisoo. “Just-” Rosé stops and gulped. “- don’t sneakily meets up with her at school if you come visit in Aussie and video calling her late at night again after this. She had troubled waking up in the morning,” Rose said. She stood up and ready to walks away when Jungkook holds her arm. Rosé stops.

“You knew?” he asked.

Rosé pulled back her arm. “I gave birth to her. I can smell her every action.”

“Mommy,” Jiyeon called her. Rosé turns to look at Jiyeon on Jungkook’s lap. “I’m sorry for not telling you,” she pouted.

Rosé her head.

“It’s okay,” she replied silently.

“Chae,” Lisa called when she was about to leave. Rosé stops but didn’t turn around. “I’m sorry for misunderstanding you,” she said. Rosé smiles and nods without even looking at Lisa.

Jungkook lift Jiyeon and put her aside on the couch. He stood up in front of Rose and looks at her attentively.

“Do you want to come out to play with us tomorrow? Just for one day,” Jungkook pleads.

Jiyeon suddenly came and holds Rose’s hand. Rosé looks at Jiyeon blinking her eyes, silently begging Rosé to come along. Rosé kneels down facing Jiyeon and puts her hand on Jiyeon’s shoulder.

“Mommy has a lot of work to do. Jiyeon go out and play with Daddy alone okay?” Rosé said.

Jiyeon pouted.

“But I want you to come along,” Jiyeon said.

Rosé thinks for a while. She turns to look at the girls sitting on the couch.

“Just one day. We’ll be fine,” Jennie smiles.

“I can’t, honey. And even if I can, I won’t,” Rosé said. Jungkook feels so down hearing what Rosé had just said. “I didn’t stop you if you want to play with your dad, and I won’t forbid you from meeting him. I gave you permission to video call him if you want to. But you have to promise me something. Never ask something that I don’t like okay?” Rosé said to Jiyeon.

Jiyeon pouted and nods slightly.