Sua’s POV

I have begun to get used to the fact that Jiu will no longer be by my side. I have grown numb to the aching pain that was caressing the inside of my chest. Enough to make it fuzzy but each time this gentle feeling happens it becomes numb. Numb from the colors that used to

Sua’s POV

I have begun to get used to the fact that Jiu will no longer be by my side. I have grown numb to the aching pain that was caressing the inside of my chest. Enough to make it fuzzy but each time this gentle feeling happens it becomes numb. Numb from the colors that used to brighten my life. Numb from the constant aching pain that travels alongside me with each passing day. Numb from feeling something happy in my life once again. Is this the effect of losing your soulmate? Will this pain subside enough for me to be the girl I used to be without Jiu?

It’s colorless. There’s no use to try and change now that Jiu is not with me. No one truly cares about me that’s why no one ever stays friends with me long enough to know all sides about me. Maybe those bullies were right, no one needs me in this world why try living it. Jiu wouldn’t be sad with me gone. She said so herself that she needs to evaluate her life without me. I should just disappear and never return.

I gasped at my own thoughts and how quickly they escalated to the point that might have put me in a very bad place. I shake my head to clear those thoughts however that just pushed it to the back of my mind where they would be suppressed for only a small amount of time.

It’s been 3 months since I’ve entered high school, and not once did Jiu tried to contact me, however, she might be busy since I’m kind of struggling with my studies. It’s also hard for me to make friends but at least the bullying hasn’t started… yet.

I contact my parents as often as I can but knowing them, they will always be worried for me which is a good thing. It shows that someone cares for me. That’s something for me to look forward to in life… I guess… it’s just different from having my soulmate by my side but I must live with it.

It’s not like Jiu is going to venture out there forever… right? Of course not, Jiu isn’t that cold-hearted. Okay, Sua fighting. Your goal is to make at least one friend today.

I entered the classroom and all I see were the designated groups that people already put themselves in from day one. I could feel myself stiffen up as an automatic response that I’d have to spend another 7 months with them and none of them will know me if I don’t break out of my shell.

I quickly walk to my seat, but someone was blocking it, well, more like sitting on top of it while other people were surrounding her. It reminded me of Jiu always smiling while other people were infected with her bright mood and always want to be with her. That single memory brought tears into my eyes, oh no, I don’t want to be the girl that cries in class. It’ll make me weak and I’m trying to make myself strong. Come on, Sua you got to fight through this.

…

Ah, Sua you can’t do this. The pain is too much, the aching in my chest isn’t lessening. I begin to crouch down as the tears started threatening my eyes as my vision started getting blurry. Suddenly, I felt warm hands touch my shoulders, but I couldn’t care who was touching me now. I just wanted the pain to go away. I felt myself moving to somewhere as my thoughts started going back to the good moments I had with Jiu Unnie.

Her bright smile that makes me smile with her. The way she snuggled close to me just because she found me cute. Her foolishness when she couldn’t become mature enough to keep a stoic face. The way her glasses were too big on her as her eyes were never at the center of her lenses but a little bit above it. The way she would sway her body as she is too excited to do something alone. The playful arguments on which color was the best or how she says that our favorite colors compliment each other. Mine was red and Jiu’s pink. She is my light which makes the red turn into pink when adding white to the red color.

Flashback 3^rd POV

“You know Sua… we are kind of like the sun and moon.” Jiu said out of nowhere as she rolled herself over and peaked over the bed where Sua was busy watching yet another drama. She was so immersed into the drama that she shut out all the noisy sounds that might interrupt her from the good parts. That also meant missing Jiu’s sweet voice that never fails to bring a smile to her face.

“Hey~” Jiu called out to Sua once again only to be ignored by the girl. Jiu sulked at the fact that Sua had the special skill to ignore her just because she had the patience to see everything through. Jiu got up from Sua’s bed and laid her head on the arch of Sua’s back. It wasn’t a good position to lie in, but Jiu didn’t care she wanted her lover to notice her even if it was just a little second. Sua felt the heavy presence on her back and paused her drama.

“Ya! What are you doing, Jiu Unnie?” Sua faked being angry but she was kind of sad that she had to put on a good episode on hold. Jiu sat up and looked at Sua in the eyes and smiled herself.

“Now that I got your attention, I want you to know that we are like the sun and moon,” Jiu stated as she grinned to herself for being so smart to make themselves a symbol. Sua didn’t understand what Jiu meant by them being the sun and moon.

“The sun and the moon?” Sua replied to the overly excited lover. She knew that she was going to hear a long speech, but she’ll endure it since she loved the sound of Jiu speaking.

“Yes, my little Sua, we are like the sun and moon. Why you may ask? Well, I’ll tell you why. First reason because of our personalities. I’m bright and cheerful like the sun and people are always up to be with me and such but sometimes being with the sun causes consequences like cancer, or people might have an allergic reaction. That and people are naturally drawn to me and stuff like that.” Jiu was becoming sad as her words were hitting home to Sua who was the opposite of her. It was like she was rubbing salt on Sua’s fears and wounds. Jiu scooted closer to her lover and grabbed her hands. “I’m not done yet.” She kissed the tip of her nose and that made Sua feel a little bit better.

Jiu continued. “The moon is pretty, even though it’s in the night. It illuminates all by itself and no one appreciates its beauty. However, when people become closer to that moon, they find out all these hidden sides to it that no one hasn’t seen before. Once the full moon comes out it only lasts for a little bit. The people who finally see that full moon can only see it once a month. That’s how hard it is to get full trust from the moon. It’s rare and people don’t look for full moons. You represent that moon, Sua, I’ve got to know all your sides. You are pretty, caring, strong and overall, the light the shines in my heart.” Jiu said as Sua was touched by Jiu’s words. She shyly smiled at them not knowing what to say anything else. Jiu put her hand on Sua’s cheek and brought them into a kiss.

When they broke apart Jiu placed her forehead on Sua’s and continued. “We’ll dance a dance no one else knows the tune to. Even though the sun and moon are separated we always find ourselves back to each other. We witness things from different perspectives, but we never let that change us. We are the sun and moon, and no one can change that about us. No matter what life throws at us we will stand strong and always be back in each other’s arms to dance or cry or whatever we want.” Jiu said and Sua just laughed as she noticed that Jiu ran out of words to say after that.

“You’re adorable, do you know that?” Sua said as she giggled while Jiu pouted at Sua’s words.

“I’m supposed to be cool once I said that.” She started sulking which made Sua laugh even more.

“You are such a dolt.” She placed her hand on Jiu’s hand that was on her cheek. She kissed the inside of the palm, “but you are my dolt.” Jiu blushed at the statement and gesture. When did Sua become aggressive? Jiu thought to herself as she found this change in Sua kind of exciting.

“Did you just call me a dolt?” Jiu countered back surprised that Sua would call her that. “I just gave you insight on why we were symbols.” She was dumbfounded that Sua said it naturally, but she just laughed at Jiu.

“Have you seen yourself?” Sua said as she was trying to not laugh at Jiu’s shocked expression, however, after a couple of seconds, Sua started laughing which Jiu couldn’t help but join in on the laughing even though she was offended by Sua’s declaration.

"I'm going to get you back for that statement," Jiu said as Sua paled at her tone. She started running away from Jiu and her following soon after that. Laughter filled the house so much that neither girl thought that none of them were going to lose those precious moments.

Present

Sua shook her head as the memories kept playing through her head. It kept repeating until she felt a strong slap across her face. She was facing herself in the mirror as another person still had their right hand raised into the air. Sua noticed that she was in tears and the pain was still present, however, the memories were no longer overwhelming her mind as it didn’t flash before her eyes. Her mind was now in reality. She looked at the girl who seemed to have saved her from the torment that might have been going on for a while if she hadn’t slapped her. She looked at the girl and she was speechless about her beauty.

“Th-thank…. You.” Sua whispered out as her voice sounded hoarse from what probably been the underuse of it since she rarely spoke to her parents after moving into the dorms.

The girl slowly puts her raised hand down and just watched Sua as she dried her tears and tried to quiet down her sniffles. She nodded her head as she began debating on leaving the poor girl alone to freshen up before classes start. She looked so broken when I saw her enter the classroom. I hope she is okay. She thought to herself.

“You don’t have to wait up for me… I’ll be in class after a couple more minutes.” Sua said but somehow her words didn’t ease the helpful girl who was still standing before her.

“Are you okay?” She said to Sua who still looked distraught from her mini breakdown. There was something about the helpless Sua that made the girl think that she needed to be by her side. That this girl needs someone who can fix her from her broken state.

Sua couldn’t help but laugh at the harmless question. She was far from being okay at all. She was lost. She was broken. She was struggling and most of all she was already giving up on life. “I’ll be fine soon enough,” Sua said as she didn’t look at the girl. She didn’t need someone who was already looking at her with pity.

“You don’t look fine right now. Well… more like at all.” Sua tensed at how the girl noticed that about her. She couldn’t help but think back to Jiu who would always see through her facades. It was déjà vu all over again, however, this time, there were no soul mates involved.

“You don’t know me at all so please leave me alone,” Sua said as she steeled herself from getting close to someone again. She needed to be less dependent on someone. She didn’t need anyone to fight her battles, however, she needed friends, but she didn’t want to make them just by crying and them thinking that she was weak.

“I’d like to get to know you. Let’s start, now shall we? I’m Lee Siyeon, what is your name?” She extended her hand to let Sua know that she was being friendly, and the look of her eyes didn’t show pity. Sua looked at Siyeon for a while before shaking her hand.

“I’m Kim Sua.” Her voice came out cold and that was when she knew that her whole life would change by this person. Siyeon was stunned at the change in Sua. It was like she had built a wall around her in a short period of time, but she didn’t mind it at all. This is going to be an interesting friendship. Siyeon thought as they let go and started going back to the classroom.

righten my life. Numb from the constant aching pain that travels alongside me with each passing day. Numb from feeling something happy in my life once again. Is this the effect of losing your soulmate? Will this pain subside enough for me to be the girl I used to be without Jiu?

It’s colorless. There’s no use to try and change now that Jiu is not with me. No one truly cares about me that’s why no one ever stays friends with me long enough to know all sides about me. Maybe those bullies were right, no one needs me in this world why try living it. Jiu wouldn’t be sad with me gone. She said so herself that she needs to evaluate her life without me. I should just disappear and never return.

I gasped at my own thoughts and how quickly they escalated to the point that might have put me in a very bad place. I shake my head to clear those thoughts however that just pushed to the back of my mind where they would be suppressed for only a small amount of time.

It’s been 3 months since I’ve entered high school, and not once did Jiu tried to contact me, however, she might be busy since I’m kind of struggling with my studies. It’s also hard for me to make friends but at least the bullying hasn’t started… yet. I contact my parents as often as I can but knowing them they will always be worried for me which is a good thing. It shows that someone cares for me. That’s something for me to look forward to in life… I guess… it’s just different from having my soulmate by my side but I must live with it. It’s not like Jiu is going to venture out there forever… right? Of course not, Jiu isn’t that cold-hearted. Okay, Sua fighting. Your goal is to make at least one friend today.

I entered the classroom and all I see were the designated groups that people already put themselves in from day one. I could feel myself stiffen up as an automatic response that I’d have to spend another 7 months with them and none of them will know me if I don’t break out of my shell. I quickly walk to my seat, but someone was blocking it, well, more like sitting on top of it while other people were surrounding her. It reminded me of Jiu always smiling while other people were infected with her bright mood and always want to be with her. That single memory brought tears into my eyes, oh no, I don’t want to be the girl that cries in class. It’ll make me weak and I’m trying to make myself strong. Come on, Sua you got to fight through this.

Ah, Sua you can’t do this. The pain is too much, the aching in my chest isn’t lessening. I begin to crouch down as the tears started threatening my eyes as my vision started getting blurry. Suddenly, I felt warm hands touch my shoulders, but I couldn’t care who was touching me now. I just wanted the pain to go away. I felt myself moving to somewhere as my thoughts started going back to the good moments I had with Jiu Unnie. Her bright smile that makes me smile with her. The way she snuggled close to me just because she found me cute. Her foolishness when she couldn’t become mature enough to keep a stoic face. The way her glasses were too big on her as it didn’t stay at the center of the glass but a little bit above it. The way she would sway her body as she is too excited to do something alone. The playful arguments on which color was the best or how she says that our favorite colors compliment each other. Mine was red and Jiu’s was pink she is my light which makes the red turn into pink when adding white to the red color.

Flashback 3^rd POV

“You know Sua… we are kind of like the sun and moon.” Jiu said out of nowhere as she rolled herself over and peaked over the bed where Sua was busy watching yet another drama. She was so immersed into the drama that she shut out all the noisy sounds that might interrupt her from the good parts. That also meant missing Jiu’s sweet voice that never fails to bring a smile to her face. “Hey~” Jiu called out to Sua once again only to be ignored by the girl. Jiu sulked at the fact that Sua had the special skill to ignore her just because she had the patience to see everything through. Jiu got up from Sua’s bed and laid her head on the arch of Sua’s back. It wasn’t a good position to lie in, but Jiu didn’t care she wanted her lover to notice her even if it was just a little second. Sua felt the heavy presence on her back and paused her drama.

“Ya! What are you doing, Jiu Unnie?” Sua faked being angry but she was kind of sad that she had to put on a good episode on hold. Jiu sat up and looked at Sua in the eyes and smiled herself.

“Now that I got your attention, I want you to know that we are like the sun and moon,” Jiu stated as she grinned to herself for being so smart to make themselves a symbol. Sua didn’t understand what Jiu meant by them being the sun and moon.

“The sun and the moon?” Sua replied to the overly excited lover. She knew that she was going to hear a long speech, but she’ll endure it since she loved the sound of Jiu speaking.

“Yes, my little Sua, we are like the sun and moon. Why you may ask? Well, I’ll tell you why. First reason because of our personalities. I’m bright and cheerful like the sun and people are always up to be with me and such but sometimes being with the sun causes consequences like cancer, or people might have an allergic reaction. That and people are naturally drawn to me and stuff like that.” Jiu was becoming sad as her words were hitting home to Sua who was the opposite of her. It was like she was rubbing salt on Sua’s fears and wounds. Jiu scooted closer to her lover and grabbed her hands. “I’m not done yet.” She kissed the tip of her nose and that made Sua feel a little bit better. Jiu continued. “The moon is pretty, even though it’s in the night it illuminates all alone and no one appreciates its beauty. However, when people become closer to that moon they find out all these hidden sides to it that no one hasn’t seen before. Once the full moon comes out it only lasts for a little bit. The people who finally see that full moon can only see it once a month. That’s how hard it is to get full trust from the moon. It’s rare and people don’t look for full moons. You represent that moon, Sua, I’ve got to know all your sides. You are pretty, caring, strong and overall the light the shines in my heart.” Jiu said as Sua was touched by Jiu’s words. She shyly smiled at them not knowing what to say anything else. Jiu put her hand on Sua’s cheek and brought them into a kiss. When they broke apart Jiu placed her forehead on Sua’s and continued. “We’ll dance a dance no one else knows the tune to. Even though the sun and moon are separated we always find ourselves back to each other. We witness things from different perspectives, but we never let that change us. We are the sun and moon, and no one can change that about us. No matter what life throws at us we will stand strong and always be back in each other’s arms to dance or cry or whatever we want.” Jiu said and Sua just laughed as she noticed that Jiu ran out of words to say after that.

“You’re adorable, do you know that?” Sua said as she giggled while Jiu pouted at Sua’s words.

“I’m supposed to be cool once I said that.” She started sulking which made Sua laugh even more.

“You are such a dolt.” She placed her hand on Jiu’s hand that was on her cheek. She kissed the inside of the palm, “but you are my dolt.” Jiu blushed at the statement and gesture. When did Sua become aggressive?  Jiu thought to herself as she found this change in Sua kind of exciting.

”Did you just call me a dolt?” Jiu countered back surprised that Sua would call her that. “I just gave you insight on why we were symbols.” She was dumbfounded that Sua said it naturally but Sua just laughed at Jiu.

“Have you seen yourself?” Sua said as she was trying to not laugh at Jiu’s shocked expression, however, after a couple of seconds, Sua started laughing which Jiu couldn’t help but join in on the laughing even though she was offended by Sua’s declaration.

"I'm going to get you back for that statement," Jiu said as Sua paled at Jiu's tone. She started running away from Jiu and her following her soon after. Laughter filled the house so much that neither girl thought that none of them were going to lose those precious moments.

Present

Sua shook her head as the memories kept playing through her head. It kept repeating until she felt a strong slap across her face. She was facing herself in the mirror as another person still had their right hand raised into the air. Sua noticed that she was in tears and the pain was still present, however, the memories were no longer overwhelming her mind as it didn’t flash before her eyes. Her mind was now in reality. She looked at the girl who seemed to have saved her from the torment that might have been going on for a while if she hadn’t slapped her. She looked at the girl and she was speechless about her beauty.

“Th-thank…. You.” Sua whispered out as her voice sounded hoarse from what probably been the underuse of it since she rarely spoke to her parents after moving into the dorms. The girl slowly puts her raised hand down and just watched Sua as she dried her tears and tried to quiet down her sniffles. She nodded her head as she began debating on leaving the poor girl alone to freshen up before classes start. She looked so broken when I saw her enter the classroom. I hope she is okay. She thought to herself. “You don’t have to wait up for me… I’ll be in class after a couple more minutes.” Sua said but somehow her words didn’t ease the helpful girl who was still standing before her.

“Are you okay?” She said to Sua who still looked distraught from her mini breakdown. There was something about the helpless Sua that made the girl think that she needed to be by her side. That this girl that was before needed someone who can fix her from her broken state.

Sua couldn’t help but laugh at the harmless question. She was far from being okay at all. She was lost. She was broken. She was struggling and most of all she was already giving up on life. “I’ll be fine soon enough,” Sua said as she didn’t look at the girl. She didn’t need someone who was already looking at her with pity.

“You don’t look fine at all. Well… more like at all.” Sua tensed at how the girl noticed that about Sua. She couldn’t help but think back to Jiu who would always see through her facades. It was déjà vu all over again, however, this time, there were no soul mates involved.

“You don’t know me at all so please leave me alone,” Sua said as she steeled herself from getting close to someone again. She needed to be less dependent on someone. She didn’t need anyone to fight her battles, however, she needed friends, but she didn’t want to make them just by crying and them thinking that she was weak.

“I’d like to get to know you. Let’s start, now shall we? I’m Lee Siyeon, what is your name?” She extended her hand to let Sua know that she was being friendly, and the look of her eyes didn’t show pity. Sua looked at Siyeon for a while before shaking her hand.

“I’m Kim Sua.” Her voice came out cold and that was when she knew that her whole life would change by this person. Siyeon was stunned at the change in Sua. It was like she had built a wall around her in a short period of time, but she didn’t mind it at all. This is going to be an interesting friendship. Siyeon thought as they let go and started going back to the classroom.