Hansol slowly opened his eyes. He must have dozed off eventually. He could tell it was still early, the sun was just starting to make its way into the room. Seungkwan wasn't lying next to him anymore, but was sitting on the edge of the bed. Hansol propped himself up on his elbows. “Hey.” He said, voice still hoarse with sleep.

Seungkwan didn't look at him. He was staring at his hand. “Please take this from me.” He said with a small shaky voice. Hansol got closer and gently took the pill out of his hand.

“Where did you get this?” He asked calmly.

“Mattress. I hid it under there.”

Hansol got up from the bed and held out his hand for Seungkwan to get up too. He stuck his hands down the mattress and felt around for more. He pulled out a couple and shoved them in his pocket. He turned to look at Seungkwan who had his arms wrapped around himself. He his arms and lifted his face with one hand in the most gentle way he could, just so he would look him in the eye. “Was that all?”

Seungkwan nodded. Hansol kept their eye contact for a few seconds before he chose to believe he was telling the truth. “What about the rest of the house? Anything in your bag? The kitchen? Bathroom?”

Seungkwan shook his head, “Just my bag, but Seungcheol got that.”

Hansol pulled him in for a hug, “Okay.” He felt Seungkwan wrap his arms around him. “How are you feeling?”

“Not too bad yet. Physically anyway. But it's going to get worse. It's only been a few hours.”

“Maybe we should go to the hospital? They can help you-”

Seungkwan pulled back, keeping his arms on Hansol's waist, “No! Please. I don't want to go anywhere. I just want to stay here with you.”

Hansol pulled him back in his arms. “Okay. Okay, we'll stay here. But it's not going to be easy. You know that right?”

“I know. But you'll stay with me, right?”

“Of course. And I know you're strong. You can do this. How about we try to get a bit more sleep? It's still early.”

Seungkwan had trouble believing Hansol's words. He didn't feel strong. But he felt like with Hansol by his side he would be able to get through this. Somehow.

<>

Mingyu was up early. He carefully opened the door to Seungkwan's bedroom to find him sleeping in his bed with Hansol. He had been trying to figure out the unknown Chinese label, but came up with nothing. He sighed and ran a hand through his messy hair. He would prefer to know exactly what they were dealing with before Seungkwan woke up. So he took out his phone and hoped Jun was awake. Luckily he picked up right away. Apparently he had been working late and was still awake after getting home. Mingyu asked him to come over. He didn't want to send a picture of the stuff in case it was, as he suspected, illegal. He'd rather not have that on his phone. In the time it took for Jun to get there Seungcheol and Soonyoung had also woken up. Jun arrived together with Jisoo.

“Chan wanted to come to, but I told him it's probably better to wait a while.” Jisoo said to Seungcheol who nodded in agreement. “He feels terrible, Seungcheol. He never meant any harm and he says he didn't know Seungkwan was taking anything else, he-”

“Jisoo.” Seungcheol interrupted him, “No offense, but right now I don't really care. I'm sure he didn't want to hurt Seungkwan and he may have thought he was helping him in some way, but right now I don't care about how he is feeling. He and Hansol can deal with that later.”

Jisoo nodded and placed a comforting hand on his arm, “Of course. I hope you don't mind I came?”

Seungcheol reached up and shortly Jisoo's cheek, “Of course not. I'm sorry I asked you to leave yesterday. Why did you come anyway? I wasn't expecting you and Jeonghan yesterday, was I?”

Jisoo felt like a stone was dropped in his stomach. “We came to see you.”

“Well, I kind of thought.”

“We wanted to talk to you, but...you know what? That can wait.” This was probably the worst time to discuss the talk he'd had with Jeonghan.

“Is it something serious?”

“Really, let's talk later.” Jisoo was a terrible liar when it came to these type of things and he was sure it read all over his face that it wasn't a pleasant thing they had wanted to talk with him about.

“Jisoo? What's going on?”

“I...”

“Look, you've already put it in my head that something is wrong now, so you might as well just tell me.”

“It's Jeonghan...he talked to me yesterday...”

“About what?” Jisoo looked at the other people in the room. They weren't paying any attention to them, but he felt uncomfortable discussing this out in the open, “Can we talk somewhere private?”

Seungcheol nodded. “We can go to the bedroom.” He signaled his friends before they went. “Let me know when he wakes up, okay?”

Jisoo sat down with Seungcheol on the bed. He still wasn't sure if it was the right thing to do to tell him right now, but they might as well get it over with. He didn't like keeping anything from him.

“So,” Seungcheol started, “You said Jeonghan came to talk to you yesterday?”

'Actually,” Jisoo started but stopped. He felt like he had to tell him now about how Jeonghan felt about their relationship, but he would leave the whole expulsion story for a later time. “Ehm, sort of. He came over to our hang-out. I wanted to see him and thought maybe we could see you too, but we somehow got to talking and he expressed that...”

“That what?”

“He...he thinks it's better if he's no longer part of this relationship. He said it's a two person relationship with three people in it.”

“Oh...and what did you say?”

“I honestly wasn't sure what to say, Seungcheol. He talked about how you and I are together and how it's different from how we are with him and...it hurts, but it's not entirely untrue, is it? I don't know if it's just me, and I feel terrible for saying this because I do care for him, a lot, but...I think I do feel different about you. And if you feel like that too, it's also not fair to him.” He was choking up again and he could tell Seungcheol needed a moment to process. He took his hand and they just sat there for a moment.

“Do you mind if I call him? Alone? I...I see what you're saying and I understand that it might be for the best but...I can't just have it end like this, you know?”

Jisoo nodded. “Of course. I'll go out, buy some stuff or whatever and come back later. I'm sorry I'm burdening you with this right now.”

“No, I'm glad you told me what's going on.” Seungcheol said with a weak smile. He leaned in and pecked Jisoo on the lips. “I love you.”

“I love you too.”

Jisoo left and Seungcheol pulled up Jeonghan's contact on his phone. It was still early, but he didn't want to wait with this. It would be better to meet in person maybe, but right now he didn't want to leave Seungkwan. He pressed call and waited for him to pick up.

“Hello?” Jeonghan's voice was soft.

“Hey, it's me. Sorry, did I wake you?”

“Don't worry about it. Are you okay? How is Seungkwan?” On the other side of town Jeonghan sat on his bed with his knees pulled up to his chest and his blanket wrapped around his slender shoulders.

“Seungkwan is still sleeping. Not for much longer I'm guessing. But that's not why I'm calling.”

Jeonghan had figured as much.

“I talked with Jisoo just now.”

“I see.”

“He told me about what you guys wanted to talk to me about when you came over yesterday.”

“Seungcheol, I'm sorry. I wanted to talk to you about this in person. I-”

“Don't be sorry. I'm sorry. Sorry if I ever made you feel like there wasn't enough room for you.”

Jeonghan could hear the crack in Seungcheol's voice and neither of them spoke for a moment. They both understood this was the end of their relationship.

“Can we still be friends?” Jeonghan asked with a hushed voice.

Seungcheol took a deep breath to get himself together. Tears were stinging his eyes and he was glad Jeonghan wasn't there to see it. “Of course. But maybe not right away.”

Jeonghan bit his lip. Yesterday with Jisoo had already been hard and now he was going through it again. In his life he had broken up with plenty of people, but he almost never cried. He usually didn't care enough. But now there were silent tears running down his cheeks. He knew it was for the better. He didn't belong in that relationship. But it hurt.

<>

Mingyu handed Jun the bottle with the Chinese label, “Can you tell me what this is? And more importantly, what's in it?”

Jun took the bottle from him and looked at the label. “It's a type of pain medication. It hasn't been on the market for very long and it's not legal yet in most countries.”

So Jun knew what it was. That probably wasn't a good thing. “Why not?”

Jun shrugged, “Not enough testing yet I guess. There are some studies indicating it's quite addictive, but it's effective and lots of people want it.”

Mingyu sighed and held out a notepad, “Can you write down the ingredients for me?”

Jun did what Mingyu asked and handed it back to him when he was done. “Here.”

“Thanks.” Now that he got what he needed, there was one more thing Mingyu wanted to know. “Did you sell it to him?”

“No.” Jun answered truthfully. There was something he wanted to know as well. “Why did you ask me for this information? Why not Hao?”

“Because I think there is a high possibility he's the one who gave or sold it to him and I can't deal with that right now.”

“What if I had been the one to sell it to him?”

“I would be angry for sure, but it's different. You're not my boyfriend.”

“Right.”

“Anyway...thanks for the info. Sorry for keeping you up after you've worked all night.”

Jun shook his head. “Nah, it's okay. But I think I'll head home again to get some sleep. I think Jisoo will stick around here for a bit longer anyway. Can you tell him I left and to keep me posted?”

Mingyu nodded. Jun left and Mingyu sat down on the couch next to Soonyoung. “You look like you haven't slept much.”

“I haven't. How could we, I, have missed it, Gyu? .”

Mingyu sank back into the couch, “I know. But you know, he was probably pretty good at hiding it and it wasn't strange or unusual for him to be stressed, especially with everything that has happened.”

“Do you think none of this would have happened if our gang hadn't gotten more involved with the others?”

Mingyu thought about that for a second. His thoughts again went to his boyfriend. “I don't know. Thinking back to that time in high school it was all pressure from his parents and stress from school, wasn't it? He's had a lot to deal with over the last year and I think the chance that he would have a relapse at some point was always there. We should have been more attentive after he landed in the hospital.”

“I thought he was doing alright, you know? I just...I'm so tired of myself being such a crappy friend. Maybe he never should have moved in here. I know I said I thought it was better for him, but looking back I might just have been selfish. Maybe I just wanted to prove that I was a better choice for him than Hansol was. But I think he might have been happier when he was living with him. I just wanted to continue to be his best friend, you know?”

“Maybe.” Mingyu replied. “But can I just point out that you're doing it again? You're making this about you when it's really not.”

Soonyoung bit his lip. He hadn't even noticed that he was talking about himself again.

“How about we just focus on being there for him now? He's going to need us. And I'm not just talking about when he's getting the stuff out of his system.”

Soonyoung nodded. The door to room Seungcheol and Jisoo had been in opened but only Jisoo came out. He looked upset, but he didn't seem like he was going to talk about it with them. Instead he came over to the couch and focused his attention on Mingyu, “I'm going to the supermarket to get some food and stuff. Is there anything I can get that Seungkwan might want or need?”

“Oh, ehm, I guess, but you don't have to go all the way to the supermarket. We always just have it delivered.”

“I know, but I feel like I have to do something right now and this is all I can think of.”

Soonyoung stood up. “Give me ten minutes and I'll drive you. Jun left and probably took the car you came in.”

“Oh, thanks.”

Jisoo sat down and waited.

“Give me your phone.” Mingyu said, “I'll write you a shopping list. Have Soonyoung pay by the way.” As he was typing he offered Jisoo a quick glance, “Everything alright with you and Cheol?”

“Yeah, sort of. It will be. It's nothing for you to worry about.”

Without asking anything else he handed the phone back. Soonyoung came back and the two of them left, leaving Mingyu by himself in the living room. He checked his own phone and saw several unread messages from his boyfriend asking what was going on. He didn't answer.

<>

Seungcheol was just getting out of the shower when he heard voices in the living room. He quickly got out and saw Seungkwan and Hansol had woken up and were sitting at the table. Jisoo and Soonyoung didn't seem to be back yet. He sat down as well.

“Morning. How are you?” He didn't really have to ask to know how he was. Seungkwan was bouncing his leg, something he always did when he was feeling stressed or anxious.

“I was just saying,” Mingyu responded instead, “That we can get him something to help him with this. To make it a bit easier.”

“And I said I don't want anything.” Seungkwan snapped.

Mingyu clicked his tongue, but Seungcheol stayed calm. “You really want to go cold turkey on this?”

Seungkwan nodded.

Hansol placed his hand on Seungkwan's restless leg, “Babe, if it can help you, maybe you should-”

“Don't tell me what to do!” He snapped again, but immediately seemed to regret losing his temper. His leg stopped bouncing for a moment. “I'm sorry. I just. I don't want anything, okay? Don't offer me anything.”

“Fine.” Mingyu bit back, “But if your withdrawal symptoms get too bad I'm taking you to the hospital! It's going to get worse over the next few days. You know that.”

Seungkwan found Hansol's hand and he didn't say anything. He knew.

Mingyu got up from the table. “I'm making you a light breakfast. Go take a shower.”

Seungkwan watched him go into the kitchen and he looked over at Seungcheol, “Is he mad at me? Are you all mad at me?”

“Nobody is mad, Seungkwan.”

“Just disappointed?”

“Just worried. And sorry for not noticing you were having such a hard time sooner. We all love you, okay?”

Seungkwan nodded.

He took a shower together with Hansol and he tried to eat as much from the breakfast Mingyu had made him as he could. Throughout the day they tried to keep him distracted. They all knew the worst was yet to come. His withdrawal symptoms were already starting to show. He was irritable, at times his heart rate would suddenly increase, and he felt like he was getting the flu with a stuffy nose and an upcoming fever. But the worst part was the way he constantly wanted to check his bag or his drawer just to see if maybe one or two pills had been left behind. He didn't. He got up multiple times, but sat down again each time. He was grateful that everytime he needed it there was someone nearby whose hand he could reach out for.