Dear Journal,

You wouldn't believe what I got today. I was just collecting signed field trip forms and just as I am checking everyones if there are signatures, Seunghan's section for the volunteer driver was filled out. Seungcheol's name was written and he signed it. Just what the . I spoke to Junhui last night and he agreed to be the driver and now Seungcheol..... Oh God.

I spoke to the board of teachers if I can void Seungcheol's submission over lunch but they said I can't because it's already been done. I can ask for help still if I wanted to though. I told them i'm bringing Junhui and they approved. Thank God, it won't be just me and Seungcheol. Atleast I have him beside me. 

I'm kind of nervous now. What if Seungcheol gets upset because I brought Junhui with me? Would he be upset if he knows i'm in a relationship? Would he be upset if I dated someone he didn't approve? Because before, every milestone in my life, he was there to make decisions for me. Like when I got my first job and he told me to quit because I started to hang out less with him. What if Seungcheol knows I no longer love him? Would he stop doing everything he can think of to come to me? Would I stop seeing his smile, his damn smile...? Would he stop using Seunghan to see me? Would he stop using his stupid reasons of buying a damn cricket just to see me again? Would he stop making efforts?

Oh god.... this is so frustrating. So d