Sehun is waiting in the line to get some foods for both him and Haewon, the line isn’t really long so he can quickly orders.

“Double shack burger, single smoke shack, and two lemonades please.” he says as he pulls out his wallet, he pays for the foods and waits until all are in the tray. “Here you go, enjoy your food!” the cashier says and Sehun smiles at her before taking the tray and walks to where Haewon is sitting. She is playing with her phone until he comes. He puts all the foods on the table and sits. “Thank you,” Haewons thanks him and he just nods at her as he’s already hungry.

“Here, I don’t want to owe anything.” Haewon hands him some money and he looks up from his foods, “No, keep it. It’s okay,” Sehun refuses and she insists by keeping her hand in front of him. He chuckles and then put her hand back, “You can pay me back with something else though,” he suggests and she raises her brows, “What do you mean?” she asks him. “You can pay me back with foods too, anything but money.” he adds and she thinks for a while, “Okay then,” she says and starts to dig in her burger.

Sehun eats his burger and sometimes takes a glance at Haewon. He rarely goes out and eat with a girl like this. He seems like someone who would date two girls at the same time but he’s not. He may loves to hang out with his friends but they’re not your typical athletes who doubles as playboys at the same time. They loves sports and they are popular, that doesn’t make them as a playboy. He respects girls and thinks that they deserve what boys deserve too. He did date before though.

“So, you said that English is your second language?”

Sehun starts a conversation, makes the girl in front of him looks up from her food.

“Yeah, I used to live in New York until I moved to Seoul three years ago. So it is my second language, I guess.” Haewon recounts and he nods in understanding manner.

“So you live here with your parents?” he asks her again, “Nope, I’ve been living alone for three years now. My parents still live in New York.” she answers him again and he is quite shock with the reveals.

“It sounds lonely…” he mutters and she takes a glance at him, “It is, but sometimes being alone is my favorite thing in the world” she chuckles.

“Really? I’m not really fond of being alone,” Sehun says while taking a sip of his drink, “Why?” she asks him because she’s curious. He seems succeeded in making her curious about him.

“Because being alone means that I’m completely alone with my mind? I’m not a fan of my own mind, sometimes they work differently, weird different.” Sehun admits and Haewon look at him before starts to eat her burger again.

“Different with me, the more people I’m with, the more empty feeling I have so I tend to spend some times alone.” Haewon confesses, Sehun looks at her with disbelief. He never think that someone like her would feel something different like him. He keeps looking at her until she looks back at him, “What? Something’s wrong?” she asks him and he shakes his head.

“I never thought you would think the same way I do,” he says and she laughs.

They finish their dinner and walk in the street, it’s getting late and a lot of people coming to the place. “Where do you live?” Sehun asks her as they are walking to the subway station together, “Hannam-dong, you?” she answers while kicking some rocks in her walk. “Nonhyeon-dong,” he answers and she stares at him before a chuckle come out from .

“So we’re on the different train then,” she says while they’re walking down the stairs, “I guess, see you tomorrow?” he asks to assure her presence. “Good luck on your game,” she nods and then waits for her train to open the door. She steps in with the other people and then turn around to see him still waiting for his train, he waves at her and she smiles at him before the train starts to move.

Sehun watches as her train leaving the subway station, his train will come really soon so he fishes out his phone from his pocket and sees his friends’ weird messages in the chat room.

‘Sehun’s missing! He’s missing!’ -Ttaemdong

‘Hey liar! I thought you’re coming!’ -Kkamjjong

‘What the is happening now?’ -Dyosa

He laughs at his friend before replying their messages, he didn’t realize that he hasn’t checked his phone for two hours during his time with Haewon. Weird thing but it’s real. He replies to their messages and his train soon arrives. It takes about half an hour for him to get to his station so he uses that time so ‘stalk’ Haewon’s Instagram account. He’s no stalker, he just wants to know more about her.

Her Instagram account is normal, doesn’t really have a tons of follower. Just normal people around her he guess. There’s about 25 photos and mostly doesn’t have her face in it. A bunch of photos of her cheerleading with her friends, he scrolls down to see more. She looks fine and from her conversation in the comments with her friends, she looks just like another girl from a famous squad. What she shows to him earlier doesn’t show anywhere. Any trace of loneliness or emptiness can’t be seen from her instagram account.

Maybe she’s just like him. None of his friends know about his other side. Oh Sehun whose actually feeling lonely and helpless. He grows up practically without his parents. He may has everything, great house, full facility, big pocket money. But his parents are never at home. That’s why he hates it at home because it’s just another reminder that he’s alone. That no one is there for him. No one will be waiting for him at home. The last time he and his parents are having a dinner together is when he was 10 years old. Ever since his father expands his business to Europe and his mother builds an online shop business, they are never really live at home. That’s when the symptoms show themselves.

‘Depression due to lack of affections and night terrors’

He remembers the first time he goes to see a psychiatrist for his problem, the doctor said that his parents’ lack of affection caused depression symptoms that also caused a trouble in sleeping.

No one knows about that, not even Taemin, Jongin, or Kyungsoo.

That’s how scary depression is. It could attack anyone, anytime, and anywhere. Even the brightest and happiest person in the earth could be the saddest and loneliest person in the earth. But he never tells anyone about this until he meets Haewon. Somehow he feels connected to her, that’s why he wants to understand her. To see her true self, maybe she can helps him and he can helps her.

Haewon doesn’t know how it starts, she suddenly finds herself stalking Sehun’s instagram account. She looks at the photos that he posted, running through his account that mostly filled with his basketball achievements or when he’s travelling with his friends. Looking through his feeds, she knows that he’s not your regular athlete who would date several girls at the same time just for fun. He doesn’t look like someone who cares about girls or popularity too much. Although he has almost a thousand followers, he doesn’t look like a casanova at all.

She smiles at his photo with his friends that copied The Beatles’ Abbey Road album cover.

After 20 minutes riding the train, Haewon finally arrives at her station and gets off the train. She walks for 15 minutes before finally arrives at her apartment complex.

“Good evening, Ms.Son.”

One of the security greets her and she smiles at him as she greets him back. Her apartment is on top of the hill so she needs to walk for a few minutes before she finally reaches her apartment. She puts her index finger on the fingerprint scanner and after it has read her fingerprint successfully, the door opened and she gets in her apartment.

“Welcome home,”

Haewon is greeted by her smart home device once she already put her shoes on the rack. The lights starts to turn on by themselves as she passes them by. She puts her bag on the countertop and turns on the water heater to make a cup of hot cocoa for herself. While she waits for the hot water, she looks around her apartment. She’s all alone and that is one of the reason why she love staying at home. Living alone does have a lot of plus point. But during winter, she would get the winter blues (or medically called as seasonal affective disorder by Jin) and tries to get her off to the crowd. The silence and loneliness would eat her up during winter and Jin has already said that she needs to be with people or she might do something ‘funny’.

She puts the hot boiled water into a big mug and stirs it while walking to the living room. Still using her school uniform, she sits on the couch and turns on the television. She looks at the watch on her phone that shows it’s already 7.30 p.m. She should have taken a shower but she is waiting for a call.

Her phone goes off and she quickly answers the call.

“Hey mom,” she says in english as she settles herself on the sofa.

“How’s your day? How’s the weather in Korea?” her mom asks her through the phone, Haewon looks outside to the bright night lights view from her big window.

“I’m fine, everything’s good. It’s sunny but not too hot. The basketball tournament starts really soon so the cheerleading team is starting to busy.” Haewon answers and she can hear her mother’s chuckles on the other side of the phone.

“That sounds fun, high school is always fun so enjoy that while it lasts.” her mom says and Haewon hums, “What are you doing now, mom? It’s still six o’clock in the morning, isn’t it?” she guesses while resting her head.

“Yeah, I just woke up. Your father is out for an early jog, how are you holding up?” her mom asks her and Haewon knows that she’s asking about her condition. “I’m okay…. I think,” she murmurs like a kid who is caught eating candy at night. “Remember, we love you honey.” her mom says, more like assuring Haewon to know that they love her. Haewon smiles weakly, her mom always know what to say.

“Love you too mom, also dad. I should be coming home during Christmas,” she says again, “You don’t have to if you can’t. Just make sure to eat well and sleep well, we miss you. We should be the one who come down to visit you, not the other way around.” her mom says and she just laughs, they end their conversation a couple minutes later.

Haewon put her phone on the coffee table before leaving her TV in a music channel. She goes to her bathroom and decides to take a bath before enjoying her me-time in the living room.

Sehun pushes open his bedroom door and quickly throws his bag to the soft carpet in his room. He takes off his shirt and sits on the bed while scrolling his phone. Taemin and the others are taunting him about why he hasn’t replying to their messages since hours ago. His friends could be the most supportive yet annoying friends at the same time. He chuckles at Jongin’s last reply (which filled with poop emoticon) and then turns on his Bluetooth before put it near his night light Bluetooth speaker.

A few moments later, songs could be heard through the speaker and he walks to his bathroom to take a shower. Sehun loves listening to music, it’s his way to reduce the depression inside him. Music has been his medium to channel out his depression and frustration.  He enjoys listening to music in his free time so he could easily spots with earphones at most of the time.

After ten minutes, he comes out from the bathroom and put on a loose t-shirt and pants. He takes his phone and turns of the music before heading out to downstairs. He greets some of the maids on his way to the kitchen, he’s looking for some snacks to eat. After grabbing a bag of Doritos and a can of soda, he makes his way to the living room to watch some movies or just simply go through some channels.

Sehun always come home to an empty house, not literally empty because his family has several maids who also live in the house. But empty in the terms of family, his parents are rarely at home. They would come home really late or early in the morning and then leave before he wakes up. So he decides it’s better to eat with his friends rather than eating in a big dining table all by himself. When he’s a kid, he used to wait for his parents. Sometimes they do come home at normal hours but as he slowly grows older, their quality time becomes lesser and lesser. He’s the only child in the family so he does feel lonely.

He decides to flip through Netflix to finish his marathon of The Defenders. He clicks on the show and wait for it to start while playing with his phone. He suddenly remembers Haewon and smiles at himself. She’s unique, he likes it. He enjoys his time with her, she seems like a very okay girl. She’s not your usual cheerleader-bully type of girl. He smiles as he recounts his ‘dinner’ with her earlier.

Oh, he definitely would love to do it again.

The beeping of the heart rate monitor is clear, the smell of medicine filled the room. Everything is white.

⇒ Finally an update^^ I hope you like this~ I'm was having my pre-exams and next week I have a practical exam, Why there's so many exams in my life lmao 
Anyway, thank you for the subscribers and readers:D Do leave a comment and tell me what you think about this:) I'm not a comment craver (wtf) but at least tell me what do you think about this story :| Can't stop my love for marvel even in this ff lol 
Happy Chinese New Year everyone:D