Mingyu leaned against the door frame, staring at the frail back before Wonwoo put on his shirt. The bruises on his wrists and arms were almost completely gone and Mingyu was careful not to leave any marks on that milky neck. His hair was still a bit wet from the shower so the alpha took a towel and placed them on the other’s head, drying them lightly while sighing inwardly.

Wonwoo turned his whole body around suddenly, shocking the alpha and looked up a bit, smirking triumphantly, satisfied with the surprised gasp. Mingyu couldn’t do anything at the sweet face and smiled back. Wonwoo was being mischievous and it was cute. Everything about the man when he is in his right mind was just adorable to him. Caressing his bangs a few times, Mingyu returned to the kitchen to make the omega’s final meal before leaving his apartment.

His heat was over. There was nothing left to hold him here.

Although he was almost driven crazy a few times, in the past few days, Mingyu learned so many things about the pale man, be it good or bad. His favourite thing would be how Wonwoo likes to play with his decorations whenever he was bored, which would be every time Mingyu read the omega guidebook to him, and how he likes to lay down on the floor whenever he gets the chance. The worst would be how Wonwoo would wake up in the middle of the night crying while looking for his pills when Mingyu left him to write his report in the living room a few times. The alpha would have to hold him in a tight hug to calm him down. He hated when the omega begged and screamed in his nightmare because he now know what messed him up so badly. He knew someone forced himself on Wonwoo. And he was sure the reason why Wonwoo would lost his mind when Mingyu accidentally knotted inside was because of that bastard.

Which was why he now found it really hard to let the omega go back. Because he would have to wake up alone in the room without anyone by his side. Mingyu never asked Wonwoo about it though. He doubt the other had a clue he knew about it either.

‘Wae?’

‘Nothing…’ Mingyu brushed it off and watched as Wonwoo continued to munch on his sandwich. Noticing the stare, Wonwoo pushed a piece towards the alpha who beamed happily and took a bite. ‘You sure you don’t want me to send you?’

‘Yeah. You’ve done enough. You still need to finish your report.’

‘I wanna send you. Can’t I drive you back?’ Wonwoo only gave him a small smile and a shake. Mingyu rolled his eyes when he remembered ‘Owh yeah. Your friends might kill me.’

‘They won’t… I think.’ He didn’t seem to be convinced by his own words because his friends were really mad at their argument a few days ago and were still worked up over it. He doubt they would let Mingyu near him without causing a commotion. And though Wonwoo thinks he need not answer to anybody regarding his personal matters, he knew they feel responsible and overprotective over him out of guilt of letting that night happen. The least he could do was not worry them. And telling them about this week would. This was a big deal. He just spent his first heat with Mingyu. He just slept with an alpha for the first time after his attack. Jeonghan would understand him, Seungcheol might or might not, Jun would flip out completely. ‘I’ll tell them.’

‘About us? Wonwoo, what are we?’

Wonwoo sighed, putting the sandwich down. ‘I… I just broke up few weeks ago. It’s still too early for me.’

That was not it. Soonyoung and him ended way before. The only reason why he rejected Mingyu’s offer to be lovers was because he felt that the reason why he stayed with the alpha was, in Mingyu’s words, out of convenience. He needed someone to be with him and Mingyu just happened to be there. Even if he had meet some other alpha who could make him feel safe, Wonwoo couldn’t be completely sure he wouldn’t sleep with that alpha either.   

In fact, he could actually think of a few other reasons why he didn’t mind being around Mingyu such as him actually already recovering from his trauma and was not afraid of the other kind anymore, or him already making peace with his change to an omega and all his responsibility as an alpha’s mate. Whatever the reason, Wonwoo was not ready for other commitments. He still need medicine to cope with his daily life. He was not in the position to be someone’s lover.

Nodding in understanding, Mingyu held up his hand to touch the other but before he could do so, Wonwoo got up from his seat and moved to the sink to wash his plate. ‘I guess uh… I’ll see you after the break? We can hang out if you want…’

‘Can I call you during the break? Let’s keep in touch.’

‘Sure! Yeah… you’re not that boring so why not…’ Wonwoo laughed and the tanned male pouted. ‘You can make me more food if you want. A packed lunch everyday would be nice.’

‘Make you food? Owh… okay.’ Mingyu rolled his eyes playfully. ‘Sure. I always have time to make you food.’ Wonwoo laughed at the sarcastic remark accompanied by a failed over-reactive facial expression. The taller of the two simpered at the nose scrunch and hit Wonwoo lightly, suddenly embarrassed with himself. ‘What’re you doing during the break?’

‘It’s Coups-hyung’s last year, so we’re gonna go for a graduation trip!’

‘Sounds good. Where to?’ Wonwoo shrugged and walked towards the door, ready to leave. Mingyu forced a smile,  disheartened by the simple gesture as he was actually planning to drag Wonwoo’s time here longer. ‘Wonwoo… Remember not to see any of your alpha or omegas friends fo-‘

‘-at least two days or they’ll know we were together and they’ll kill you. Okay.’ Wonwoo finished his sentence, staring bemusedly at Mingyu. The latter had been repeating the same thing over and over again since yesterday, making sure he remembered so their time together wouldn’t be exposed, as per Wonwoo’s own request. According to the guidebook, since they slept together, their scents linger around each other for a while. Most alphas’ scents only last for a day but Mingyu’s a noble so his lasts longer. ‘Mingyu?’

‘Yeah?’

‘Is our scent lingering the same as bonding?’ Mingyu almost burst out laughing before noticing the genuine confused look on the other. ‘Nope. Urm, how do I explain this… for bonding, you’ll feel like the other’s mate is always nearby but our scents mixing after is just like… hrmm… you wearing my shirt?’

‘I don’t get it. You .’

‘Yah! I never have to explain something like that to someone!’

‘Annyeong.’ Ignoring the excited alpha, Wonwoo waved to the other, grabbing the knob to exit but was pulled in a hug. ‘Hey. You should take responsibility for my deteriorating mental health.’

Freeing himself from the bear hug, Wonwoo knocked the giant’s head lightly. ‘I like redecorating your house. Okay then, don’t miss me too much. I’m going now.’ He noticed the smirk before making his way towards the elevator.

He truly enjoyed his time with Mingyu. The man didn’t hold anything back at all. Though he hated being screamed at, it was somewhat a breath of fresh air when Mingyu scolded him to snap him out of his hysteric attacks. Wonwoo might actually be crazy, but he somehow felt a sense of security that someone would pull him back from his nightmare by any means possible. Except for Jeonghan who stopped halfway when Wonwoo fought back, everyone else only tried to talk to him whenever he felt like losing his mind. Though that sometimes calm him down, he would end up feeling like a burden when it was over. On the contrary, Mingyu plainly showed how agitated he was about his random outbursts but he never left not treat Wonwoo any different. And that made Wonwoo comfortable, knowing that someone is always there beside him, even when he couldn’t hold everything together, even when he clearly drove the other crazy.

*****

Humming his favourite song while resting his head on the headrest, looking out at the street, Wonwoo closed his eyes. It had been a while since he last ride the bus back to campus. Since that night, he never ventured out of his university alone. In fact, the only reason he would go out to the city was to see his therapist, and even then, Jeonghan would drive him to and from.  

Taking advantage of being under the protection of Mingyu’s lingering scent, Wonwoo decided to challenge himself by riding the bus instead of the more expensive taxi. It could be another step to building his self confidence. And he had to admit, the long ride back really gave him some kind of tranquility. Since there were very few people inside, that is.

Wonwoo looked around him, observing other passengers, something he liked to do back then. There was a really old lady with her big hat, a rebellious-looking teenager who kept singing some unknown song while headbanging lightly, a sweet little kid with huge glasses looking back at him with a grumpy look… This view too, had been a while. Almost a year to be exact. He had been too bitter and scared to lift his head up in public places, afraid that they knew what happened just by looking despite it being impossible.  That being said, he felt really accomplished today.

Wonwoo smiled at the kid, waving to her despite the deep frown as she was dragged out by her mother. He tried to close his eyes but sat back up when he realized something.

This scent. He smelled this before.

Turning around quickly, Wonwoo almost lost his mind when he saw a familiar alpha. The man was there that night. He didn’t remember what he did, whether he was one of those who attacked him, beat him or the ones watching but he was there. In fact, he had been close enough for Wonwoo to recognize his scent.

Owh no.

The man was staring back at him. There was a look of recognition.

Feeling sick to his stomach and trying hard not to throw up, Wonwoo pressed the stop button as quickly as he could. He needed to get out. He didn’t want to be in the bus anymore. He needed to get away. Away from the alphas. Why wasn’t the bus stopping??

‘Kid, stop pressing the button!’ Wonwoo flinched at the command, afraid to look at the owner. He could feel his whole body shaking as his breaths got shorter. He didn’t want to have a breakdown now. Not in front of his attacker.

Closing his eyes to try to distract himself, he heard the door opened and rushed out the bus, almost forgetting to pay.  He ran a few steps towards the nearest traffic light before stopping to catch his breath.

. The scent was still there. The man’s scent was getting stronger!

He couldn’t cross the street. There were too many cars. He should go straight ahead.

. He couldn’t move his legs anymore. They were shaking violently.

The man was right behind him.

Wonwoo held his breath, waiting for the pain to come but it never did. The scent got weaker, moreover at a pace quicker than it was stronger. Daring to lift his head, he saw the man holding groceries, rushing somewhere. Running away from him.

Waiting anxiously until the alpha was out of sight, plus a few more minutes until his legs would cooperate, Wonwoo stopped a blue taxi. To hell with building confidence. He just wanted to lock himself in his room and wrap himself in the blanket.

He should never have taken the bus.

*****

Wonwoo laid on the floor, fully cocooned inside his blanket, staring at the legs of his desk. He didn’t want to take his pills, Mingyu said he was becoming too dependant on them. But it was hard. His mind was a mess and his heart wouldn’t calm down. His chest hurt so bad, so was his throat from his desperate gasps for air.