One-hundred-and seventy. 

 

I stare at the swipe of the red marker against the stark white contrast of the calendar with a heavy sigh. 

 

One-hundred-and-seventy-one.

 

When will you be back? I counted down the days like a mantra, the days passing by like an old ancient film and here I waited for you as I always did.

 

My gaze moves to the desk, the mass of letters, postcards and pictures strewn all over. I see one of you smiling, the bindi and purple turban constrasting against that beautiful pale skin of yours. An unbidden smile falls on my lips. You have always been interested in different cultures, eager and curious about everything.

 

I look outside my window, the snow falling lazily on the ground, enveloping the entire place white. It was a beautiful sight, but chilly and I unconsciously shivered, pulling the thick cardigan closer to my body.

 

I move towards the desk, one of the recent postcards you sent along with a snapshot. This time you were in Australia, holding a baby kangaroo, your smile bright and happy. My heart warms at the sight.

 

 

Jinki, it read in pink ink of course, this little guy here reminds me of you with the puffy cheeks and squinty eyes. Anyways, how are you? I miss you. Are you getting enough sleep? Have you been eating properly? Don't make me come there and scold you.

 

I love you. 

 

 

I move to another postcard and this time you were in Scotland, standing by some ancient stones with one of the tour guides.

 

 

I'm here in Scotland Jinki!!! Can you believe it?!

 

I have so much to tell you! Skype date tonight? I need to tell you more about my trip to Scotland so far... and guess what? I learned some Gaelic! 

 

"Tha gradh agam ort" (that's "I love you" in Gaelic btw.)

 

I miss you. 

 

 

It was difficult to be away from you like this. I didn't mind it so much but on days like these I wish you were here with me more than ever. 

 

It was Valentine's Day after all.

 

Then there was a sudden vibrating felt against my pocket. My blackberry was blinking and I instantly reach for it. I open my inbox to read:

 

Look outside.

 

I was left standing there, surprised. What?

 

I walk towards the window and that's when I saw: you, in your thick pink jacket, the same jacket you left with the last time I saw you. A pack of bags and luggage around you. My heart felt like bursting at the seams and I wasn't sure if my feet were going to hold me up and trip me. I wasn't the most coordinated person in the world but with my heart pounding, I ran, ran and went straight to the door and into your arms. I didn't even care that I didn't wear my jacket or boots. 

 

I inhaled the sweet scent of lemon and strawberries. I missed your scent so damn much.

 

"Oh my god." I whisper against your bright yellow scarf. "Are--are you really here? Kibum?"

 

I felt your arms wrapping around my waist and then you pull away. "I'm really here, and Jinki-yah what the heck? Why aren't you wearing your jacket? Do you want to catch a cold?"

 

I laugh. I missed this. You were already back to being your usual bossy self and I wouldn't it have it any other way.

 

Then you pull me back into your arms and say softly, "Happy Valentine's Day, Jinki. It's so good to be home."