CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE

It seems like we've been losing control

Being in love is something that Sunggyu always imagines as something so sweet and soft, like a cotton candy in the middle of winter. He should listen that nothing ever stays beautiful and everything is bound to have an expired date, including happiness. There’s only a limited amount of happiness you can experience before a heartache and the aftermath of falling in love come to bite you in the back.

Leaving Woohyun is something that Sunggyu didn’t imagine to ever happened, but deep insides, he knows, it’s inevitable. He thoughts, after some time, he could convince the other to accept his uality and his irreversible attractions towards Sunggyu, and finally fight for their right in the society.

But everything goes down the drain when the dark truth making an appearance.

Yes, being with Sunggyu won’t solve their company problem, but then, after two years, how could Woohyun still treat their relationship lightly, like it doesn’t emotionally hurt Sunggyu and breaking his heart again and again with his ignorance? How can he keeps on taking, but not giving back anything?

How can he keep on treating and putting the brunette as a second choice?

After two ing years?

Deciding that he has had enough with Woohyun’s incredible ability to up his life, Sunggyu scramble out of the raven’s penthouse complex in an urgency and hustle manner, bringing his breaking piece of shattered soul along, regretting the choice of opening his fragile heart to the President, and took the first train ride to Jeonju, his home.

The ride is sickeningly long and fill will unwelcome silences and a self-reminder of what he has lost. A train ride of a lifetime, indeed, since it has been awhile since the last time he visits his hometown, deciding to keep the younger company and not leaving his side, putting the raven as a priority, and looks where he is right now.

Surely, Hoya won’t pass the chance to say ‘I told you so’ right on his face.

“Idiot.”

He gives a quick call to his brother to “pick me up, please?” when the train arrives at his destination, and with a heart as heavy as a mountain, a swollen eyes, and dishevelled clothes, he walks out of the first class compartment and down to the arrival bay for Sungjong to pick him up.

Lee Sungjong was someone without a care in the world, or so it seems. But, as he stopped his range rover (because Rolls Royce is too mainstream) in front of Sunggyu, a smug smile planting his face, he could see the rot must have changed. He was without their grandfather, something that Sunggyu find as amusing, but that was about it. Gloominess aside, their hometown is as comfortable as usual. Nothing beats your home.

“Welcome back home, hyung.”

Feeling a sudden urge to cried, Sunggyu quickly close his eyes and took a deep breath before exhaling loudly. He has enough of crying and tears, he wants a fresh start right now. And maybe if letting one thing that keeps on anchoring him until now is the only things to make him happy, he will. 

“Hey, Jongie. It’s been a while.”

A while, indeed. He was twenty and immature when he first take a decision to leave their home and the whole package of luxury that comes with it, over a stupid fight and misunderstanding with his grandparents. He makes a run to Seoul, living like a poor hobbit, which is something that he’s unfamiliar with, parading his ego and refused to listen to anyone’s advice.

And thanks to his luck, he met Dongwoo, his best friend who helps him to survive in the midst of the cruel society, and taking a quick job everywhere to support the living cost, on top of their education, since college can be a quite a . And when he met Hoya two years after, he can’t be more grateful for his help.

They arrived at Kim’s private Residences over some time, and Sungjong quickly ushered Sunggyu to “take a good rest, hyung” before disappearing through the door. His room is kept untouched and judging from the sparkling tile and neatly arranged table, he knows his grandad has instructed their maid to make a constant visit to his room to clean the dust, to actually treat the room like the owner is present and is going to come back home anytime soon.

Which brought him back to the bitter fight five years ago.

“Something bad must have happened for you to take an instant ride back home.” After what felt like hours and hours of running from confrontation, Sungjong finally drag his brother to make a quick conversation over a cup of Jasmine tea, in their private residence’s foyer. 

“Don’t worry about me,” Sunggyu whispered. His heart dropped every time he thought about his boyfriend (or should he say ex-boyfriend?) making a quick visit to his sanity, taking his entire mind and soul, again and again. He’s so ing damn tired but he knows the confrontation is inevitable.

Sungjong, after all, deserves the truth. The whole lot of truth.

The younger put down his cup and take Sunggyu’s hand into his hold, caressing the slender finger with so much love and tenderness, something that their late mother used to do a lot. “You look like hell, hyung. What-what happened to you?”

Sunggyu winced at his brother’s tone. “Do we really need to talk right now? I don’t think I’m ready yet.”

“It’s bound to happen sooner or later. Better now than later, hyung. I’m worried…” He played with Sunggyu’s ring finger, contemplating his decision to interfere with his brother’s love life. “You looks like you’ve been crying to the moon since I pick you up from the station.”

“I was.” Sunggyu bit his lips. “But I’m okay now, aren’t I?”

“Hyung?”

“Yeah?”

“I’m your bother. I know everything that happens inside your little head right now, but I want you to talk to me. Please, hyung.”

“I know. I’m sorry.” Sunggyu said. “It’s just, so many things have happened Jongie and I don’t think—that I—uh—if I’m strong enough to recall the event.”

“But hyung, seeing you crying and getting sad over something that I didn’t know frustrating me! I don’t want to spend another minute guessing on ‘what-if’s’ when I can talk to you.”

“Don’t worry about me.” He repeats, again.

“It’s not fair, hyung. Because no matter what, I’m still worried about you. We all are.”

Deciding to change the topic, Sunggyu takes his fingers out of Sungjong’s hold to take a deep taste of the tea. “You’v