Jihoon shut his door behind him as he leaned his back against it. He lets himself slide to the ground, burying his head in his hands. His mind was racing, wrists throbbing under his suit. Soonyoung was like a different man that night. Jihoon felt flattered. He would like to think that Soonyoung was jealous because of him, but he didn’t want to get his hopes up. He didn’t think he could deal with rejection from Soonyoung. Jihoon sighed once again, bringing a hand to clutch his heart. Calm down Lee Jihoon. Soonyoung had to pretend to be jealous. It wasn’t genuine.

~

Soonyoung woke up with a throbbing headache and sore eyes. He pushed himself off his bed, dragging himself into his bathroom where he stood in front of his mirror. He gaped at the image staring back at him. His hair was completely disheveled, his button-down wrinkled and stained with red wine. What shocked him the most was his face. The Kwon Soonyoung now was a ghost of what he normally looked like. His eyes and face were swollen, nose red from the excessive rubbing, tear stains streaked down his cheeks. He gripped the sides of his sink, letting the sounds of running water clear his thoughts. I hurt Jihoon.

“Soonyoung? Oh you’re up!” Seokmin smiles as he watches Soonyoung pull on a shirt. “I’ve called the office, saying that we both can’t come in today.”

“Thanks Seokmin. I smell bacon, what’s cooking?” Soonyoung beams, trying to hide his misery behind tired eyes, head still pounding like as if someone was hitting his head with a club.

“I made breakfast, and stop with the act. We are going to have a talk after we eat. Bestfriend to bestfriend.”

Soonyoung let his pretence fall, eyes that curved into crescent moons immediately giving in to sorrow. He sighed as he nodded towards Seokmin, legs carrying him to the food.

“Spit it out.” Seokmin demands as he shovels a mouthful of french toast into his mouth.

Soonyoung gulped some water together with some aspirin. “I thought we were going to have this talk after the food.”

“I’m impatient. Don’t act like as if you don’t already know that.”

“It’s a long story.”

“We have time, and I think I have an idea of the situation.”

That comment got Soonyoung raising his eyes to meet Seokmin’s. “What do you mean.”

“Look. I’m your best friend. I’m pretty sure I would have noticed if you were dating Jihoon for months. But no, I had to find out through the press. I know you Soonyoung.”

“You got it then. Right in the head. I’m not dating Jihoon for real. It’s all an act.”

“No it isn’t, and you know it.” Seokmin grew mad. Soonyoung was not accepting his feelings despite it being so blatantly obvious. He was ing stubborn!

“It isn’t real, man. We were just trying to save our jobs and now that the whole world thinks we are dating, we have to keep this up. It’s called an obligation. Sooner or later, we will break up and then we will be done with each other.”

“Do you hear yourself? Are you ing listening to what you’re saying?!” Seokmin stood up, causing his chair to screech against marble before tumbling to hit the ground.

“Say it. Say that you don’t love Jihoon. Say it to my face.”

“I don’t love Jihoon.”

“Bull.”

“I can say it again for you Seok. I don’t love Lee Jihoon.”

Seokmin sees the broken look in Soonyoung’s eyes, allowing himself to calm down, his voice becomes calmer and more gentle. “You’re just hurting yourself Soonyoung. And you’re hurting Jihoon too. Nothing good will ever come out of this. You need to man up and listen to your own heart.”

Seokmin leaves Soonyoung’s apartment, frustrated with his stupidity. Soonyoung on the other hand was left sitting on his couch, face looking up to the ceiling. He lets Seokmin’s words replay in his head as they sink in. Listen to my heart? It stopped telling me anything a long time ago. For the second time in less than twenty-four hours, Soonyoung cries, letting pain engulf him. His chest tightens and he finds it hard to breathe. He reckons the only cure to his pain could only be Jihoon.

~

The sun rose, signalling a start to a Tuesday. Soonyoung was already up by dawn, feet busy pacing his room. He would have to go into work that day, which meant that he had to face Jihoon, and try to salvage the situation. 

“Jihoon, I’m sorry. I know I keep saying this and you must be thinking that this is going nowhere. I don’t know what came over me. When I saw you with Kim Mingyu, it was like as if a switch flipped and I grew so mad. I didn’t mean to hurt you… I just couldn’t stand you looking and anybody else that was not me. I wanted to be the one to make you smile like that. I would never hurt you. Never in my life.”

Soonyoung stood in front of the wall in his room, rehearsing his conversation with Jihoon. He gulped and nodded to himself. All that was left to his plan was actually finding Jihoon and apologising.

~

The male exited the elevator, entering the ninth floor, where both his office and Jihoon’s resided. He peeped into the glass door that indicated the entrance to Team B’s section of the floor, trying to find Jihoon in his office or anywhere in fact. Just then, he heard a voice rounding the corner and he immediately flew to hide behind one of the pillars.

“Why didn’t you come into work yesterday Jihoon.”

“Sorry Seungkwan, but I wasn’t feeling too good.”

“You need a break sometimes, I swear, sometimes I get so scared that you may snap in half under all that pressure.”

Jihoon softly chuckles, bringing his hands up to cover his mouth. Soonyoung emerged behind the pillar upon hearing Jihoon’s name, determined to get a hold of the smaller before he locks himself in his office. He noticed that Jihoon had the sleeves of his dress shirt rolled down, even though he normally has them up. He sees the angry red marks under them as Jihoon brought his delicately pale hands up to his face. The red marks contrasted the pale skin. Soonyoung immediately deflated, retreating behind the pillar. Guilt crashes over him like huge waves, and he lets himself drown. The apoplogy that was at the tip of his tongue died, leaving him feeling as lost as ever and hopeless. Will Jihoon ever forgive him?

~

Jihoon face planted his couch. The weekend was one huge drama that he did not expect, and it was so overwhelming that he had to skip work on Monday to just collect his thoughts and to calm down. He gently fingers the marks on his wrists and laughs cynically. He was ready to forgive Soonyoung regardless of what he said. He knew that it wasn’t on purpose and he would forget the whole thing happened if Soonyoung could turn up in front of him right this instant. But he sighed internally. Soonyoung was not at his office this morning when Jihoon entered the building. Maybe Soonyoung was avoiding him? He would never know. He feels his face heat up as he wonders why he was so affected by what Soonoyoung did (or did not do). He must have been in too deep in this whole acting thing.

~

“Jihoon? We need to talk.” Soonyoung had gathered all his courage and approached Jihoon who was in the lounge, munching on some cookies. The moment he saw Jihoon in there, he headed straight towards the said male, not giving himself any time to run away again.

“Yeah… sure. My office?” Jihoon nodded towards the location he suggested, legs already taking him there. Soonyoung followed behind him.

“So… What was it you wanted to talk about?”

“I’m sorry Jihoon. I didn’t mean to hurt you. I was so blinded by rage that I unconsciously gripped your wrists tighter and tighter. I didn’t want you to leave. I’m so sorry. I don’t know what came over me. I just.. I…”

“Hey hey hey Soonyoung, it’s alright. I’m alright. It doesn’t hurt that much. I'm a man, I can take a little bit of pain. What happened on Sunday was partly my fault too. Everyone thought we were dating, so I guess hugging Mingyu like that was ridiculous. I wasn’t thinking straight.”

“No Jihoon! It’s not your fault. Don’t you think that!”

“Then stop thinking that it’s your fault.”

Soonyoung was unable to control himself any longer and he reached for Jihoon, pulling him into the softest, gentlest hugs. He buries his face into the crook of Jihoon’s neck, indulging in his scent. “You’re so perfect Jihoon. I must have saved a country in my previous life to deserve you.”

“You definitely got lucky when you asked me to pretend to be your boyfriend.”

“You’re amazing. You really are.”

“Let’s just forget about Sunday, Soonyoung.”

“I will never forget that I hurt you.”

“Forget about it. For me. What happened was a mistake and I don’t want anything to change between us.”

“I can’t forgive myself Jihoon.”

“Well, I will forgive you, but on one condition. Let’s forget it ever happened. Okay?”

Soonyoung sighed defeatedly. If there was anyone who could be more stubborn than him, it would be Lee Jihoon. “Okay.”

Authors note:

A really short chapter to kind of wrap up the drama for now. We need some closure before we bring in sweetness :)

The title is as such even though there was no mention of flowers at all. This is so as a purple hyacinth is an emblem of forgiveness and means "I am sorry," "Please forgive me" and "Sorrow." To tell someone that you are sorrowful over an event and wish for them to forgive you, give them a bouquet of purple hyacinth flowers to represent these emotions.