I was eight when my greatest fantasy about love was ruined— the rainbows and unicorns, the roses and gentle smiles. The promise of I love you and the epiphany of butterflies inside you while you kiss them. The crimson red cheeks as you hold each other hands and the great euphoria felt by just being with them, heart beats fast.
 

It was the day where everything changed, my dreams and perspective about love completely changed in just a snap of a finger. That was the day when my mother broke her vows as a wife, gave up her marriage in the name of lust and drowned herself in her temptations— the very same day my father first raised his fists, screaming of such profanities that I know have managed to break not only her heart but as well as her soul.
 

I used to believe that love only comes with joy. I used to think it was ethereal and just utterly beautiful. I fell in love with the idea of love that somehow, in the midst of comprehending, I forgot that love couldn't be love without it's flaws. I forgot the one real thing existing in this cruel world; pain.
 

Love can never be perfect, and as a famous author once said, pain demands to be felt. No love can ever be pain-free. Love demands sacrifice no matter how strong the bond may be. Love is messy, sometimes it's stupid and other times, it drives you insane. But that's love, I guess. It is love in it's realest form— idiotic, psychotic and pure of bulls.
 

But still, we crave for it nevertheless.
 

Stupid Humans, smh.
 

I sat on my seat, frozen and unable to move, eyes close to tears as I bit my lip. I watch as my two hyungs argued, anger painted in their very eyes, their hearts going farther and farther away as they rather share profanities and such expletive words, hands fisted on their sides like they were so close to punching the other on the face. 
 

Slowly, I could feel my heart tighten, not liking this moment one bit. "I ing told you she's nothing but my goddamn ex!" Hoseok yelled in anger. I could see red in his eyes, gone was the sweet and serene hoseok everybody have come to know. "For 's sake taehyung, grow the up!"
 

"I told you to ing stop replying to her messages!" Taehyung argued, the corners of his eyes glistening with tears. "That still loves you, you dickhead! That mothering whale still wants you! Don't you ing get that?!"
 

"You talk as if I cheated," hoseok hissed. "I told you, I love you. Isn't that enough?!"
 

"You went behind my back, hoseok. Don't you ing dare tell me you never did. I told you stop any forms of communications with her, you told me you already did. So how the is she still ing texting you?" Taehyung asked in disbelief, a tear cascading down his left eye. "You ing lied to me, hoseok. You ing cheated on me!"<